Learning To Swim: How Jews Build Resilient Families

Wondering Jews with Mijal and Noam - Unpacked

Mijal and Noam explore Jewish family dynamics through rituals like the priestly blessing, sibling relationships in Genesis, and how conflict resolution builds resilient communities. The episode blends personal stories wi

Key takeaways

• Priestly blessings symbolize unconditional love and spiritual authority

Transcript preview

Hey friends I want to ask you for a quick favor. We are always looking to understand our audience who listen to unpacked even better, who watch it, who engage with us even more. So to do that we want to hear from you directly what you're loving, what you're curious about, what you want to see more of, what you'd want to see covered, whatever it is. It's a super short survey, just two minutes, but your answers help us shape where this show goes next. So really appreciate, really appreciate it. So, really appreciate it. The link is in the link is in the show notes, or you can go to slash pod survey. Thanks for listening. Thanks for watching. Thanks for being part of this community. Now go fill out that survey please. Pretty please. Coming up on wondering Jews. Everyone's like like goes to the rabbi and kisses his hand. Goes to the rabbi kisses his hand. And I just kept on thinking what do I do? Do I avoid? Do I just like walk to the back. Do I go, do I kiss his hand? Just kiss the hand. Just do it. Hi everyone welcome to wandering Jews with Michal and noam I'm michal and I'm noam and this podcast is our way of trying to unpack those really big questions being asked in the world today about Israel about Judaism and about the Jewish experience so as you might know we've been starting to do a bunch of multi-part serious how do we say serious and plural series series okay yeah you can pronounce that so we've had one on Jewish denominations we've had one one on what did we've had one on what did we call it officially officially American Jewish experience. Jewish American Heritage Month, but the Jewish American experience. Both were pretty awesome and we got so much feedback and you know just listeners writing in and asking more questions. So we are now launching another multi-part series. This one is going to be exploring the idea of family through a Jewish lens. I think a big part of this topic was you have a new edition in your family so that's a you know, you have a, you have a new edition in your family so that's a, you know, you know, you know. Yeah, it's, you know. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, you know. Yeah, it's very. Yeah, it's very, you know, it's very, it's very, you know, it's very, you know, you know, it's very, it's very, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, it's I'm thinking a lot about family, you know, we have, thank God a beautiful, beautiful baby, yes. Very exciting. But how did your, how did your family dynamic change from your, from your children to your newest, like meaning, did they, did their dynamic change? It's so funny, so many people have asked me, and you know, we're going straight for the person, right? Always. So, so people have asked me, so, people have asked me a version of this question, they mostly ask me because there's like a six year gap between our youngest and this our new baby. So people ask me, you know, what's it like to be a new mom now, you know, six years later, assuming that there's a significant difference? I had the same question. I had people, I mean, they call me a mom, they call me a dad, but like I have three older kids and then a five year gap with our last. Right, right, right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So. So. Yeah. So. Yeah. Yeah. So. So. So. So. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. So you. dynamic changed. Yeah, I mean I think I'm a little bit more probably more relaxed you know about about the baby and it's interesting like in my maternity leave I actually felt that most of my like not the physical taking care but like the parenting I spent I gave so much energy to like my older kids who don't usually have me at home so much so it was funny because I felt like I would have this leave and it would be most focused on the baby. But I feel like my older kids just just really took advantage and we've had a lot of time together. But there's no, when you have three kids, there's not like a, and there's one, two, and then three further down. There's not like a middle sibling, right? I guess not, the older two are like a pair, a little bit. Right, that's like a pair and then like now, and they take care. It's, yeah. It's, yeah. dynamic. Over time it's going to change as someone who has watched this dynamic having someone who had a baby daughter who then became a big sister five years later. You know like it's an interesting dynamic. Get ready for it. Speaking of this dynamic you. Transition you wrote in your newsletter in your sub stack about this thing called the priestly blessing, the beercock Koyne. And that's the blessing that God gives to the to Aaron's sons and every single Friday night. Is this something that you do in your tradition also? Sephardic. Yeah, yeah, we do it Friday night and also Saturday morning, Shavanti. You do both? Yeah. You don't do both? No, just Friday night. Wow, mind blown. Okay. I'm like Sephardic normativity in my head. I guess you never want that's the same. So you thought that we all like so I also didn't, I thought it was just a Friday night thing thing. Now. Now I'm it did it like 705,000 times. 4,500 times. And I was like, wait, what's, the math isn't mathing, but then I was like, oh, it's times two. So that's, that's what it was. But, so on Friday night, so tell me like, just like, let's break this down. What is this blessing? Yeah, so in the book of numbers, in one of the Torah portions, right? So God commands the priest, you're going to bless the people of Israel and God gives like a formula right the words you know you can help me translate because oh God you know I'm still with a baby at home a little bit tired you ever I'm a very I'm sure I'm a very I'm sure I'm like a hard word to translate how would you translate that word Vichoneka give you Okay, and it's a cham, but a valech have I'm a chalom. Like, may God turn the divine presence upon you and give you peace. Yeah, is that good? Thank you. So that was originally like a blessing of priests. They would literally stand in the temple and bless the people. They were the conduits for God's blessing. And... Could you do this? Could I... Yeah, what No I'm is doing right now, the Vulcan sign? Yeah, well, it's called the Vulcan sign, It's what priests do when they bless the people with this blessing. My husband and son by the way are both priests so they actually do this in synagogue. You're a priestly family. Yes we are. We are. How does that feel? It's extraordinary. I walk around you know introducing myself. Wow, you married up. Yeah. By the way as an okay there's like so many as sides here. My daughter who six is like obsessed with being the daughter of a priest. literally will ask me to explain to strangers who are not Jewish often like, mommy can you please tell them that I'm like the daughter of a priest? I'm like what? That's awesome. Anyway, sorry I got distracted. So we have this priestly blessing and sometime in the 1600s and I had to do a bit of research into this it actually became a blessing that parents started giving their children on Shabbat. So I guess some people only on Friday night and eventually other communities Friday night on Shabbat Day as well. And it's a very special moment in which after I'm going to tell you how we do it. Tell me if anything is different. But after we make kiddush the blessing over the wine in the Shabbat meal, in the Sabbath meal, then children walk over to their parents. Parents again, a little bit different in different communities. In my community, parents place their palms on their children's head. Yeah. They say the blessing. In my family, they also person. it. And then people have different customs, like in my in Middle Eastern communities you often kiss your parents hand when after you received the blessing as like a form of you're like laughing here now. No, I just like that is What do you guys do? How does it look like for you? I actually you know what like this is I The first time I saw that was when I went to Israel when