Giving Sexual Abuse Survivors a Voice

Women Road Warriors

In this episode of Women Road Warriors, hosts Shelly Johnson and Kathy Takary interview attorney and author Alreen Hedquist about her journey from

Key takeaways

• Alreen Hedquist overcame childhood physical and sexual abuse by utilizing education and therapy to find her voice.
• Statistics suggest one in two women have experienced some form of sexual violence, though underreporting remains a significant barrier.

Main topics

• Survivor advocacy
• Sexual harassment law

Notable quotes

Wealth, influence, and status should never place anyone above accountability.

Conclusion

The episode serves as an empowering guide for survivors, emphasizing t

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:01) This Speaker 2 (0:01) is Women Road Warriors with Shelly Johnson and Kathy Takaro from the corporate office to the cab of a truck. They're here to inspire and empower women in all professions. So gear down, sit back and enjoy. Speaker 3 (0:23) Welcome. We're an award-winning show dedicated to empowering women in every profession through inspiring stories and expert insights. No topics off-limits on our show. We power women on the road to success with expert and celebrity interviews and information you need. I'm Shelley. And Speaker 4 (0:42) I'm Kathy. Speaker 3 (0:44) What does it take to turn unimaginable trauma into a life dedicated to helping others heal? Our guest today has done exactly that. Alreen Hedquist is an attorney, best-selling author, and fearless advocate who spent over 20 years fighting for survivors of sexual assault, sexual harassment, workplace discrimination, retaliation, and wrongful termination. She's the founder and managing partner of Hedquist & Eck LLP. Al Reen has recovered millions of dollars for her clients while taking on some of the nation's most powerful corporations, institutions, and public figures, proving that wealth, influence, and status should never place anyone above accountability. But Al Reen's mission didn't begin in a courtroom. It began in childhood, where she endured years of sexual, physical, and verbal abuse at the hands of her father, while living with a devastating silence that often surrounds abuse. Like so many survivors, she carried that pain in secret, battling depression and even surviving multiple suicide attempts before finding the courage to reclaim her voice. Today, she uses that voice to help countless others find theirs. Beyond her legal work, Alreen is the founder of HAE Fired Up Foundation, which supports survivors through scholarships, healing programs, grants, and trauma-informed legal education. She's also the best-selling author of Fired Up, Fueling Triumph from Trauma. That's a deeply personal and empowering book that offers hope, healing, and practical guidance for survivors ready to move forward. Alreen believes breaking the silence is where healing begins and that every survivor deserves to be heard, believed, and empowered. Welcome, Alreen. Thank you so much for being on the show with us. Speaker 5 (2:34) Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here. Speaker 3 (2:37) We are so excited to have you. Oh, my goodness. You are a true warrior and you're a warrior for others. We are so impressed with you. Speaker 5 (2:46) Thank you. Likewise. I read about both of you as well. Well, Speaker 3 (2:50) thank you. I was wondering to get started here, if you could maybe give us some cliff notes of how all of this began. There's so much to unpack. Speaker 5 (2:59) Yeah, there is a lot to unpack. So I guess I'll go back to kind of a little bit about what happened to me when I was a kid. when I was a child and kind of, you know, getting out of that situation, kind of leading me up to where I'm at today. So as you mentioned, you know, I suffered abuse, you know, by my father in all the various ways. He was, you know, emotionally Speaker 4 (3:21) abusive. He was physically abusive. And he was sexually abusive. Speaker 5 (3:25) And in the household, you know, I had a mom. I was looking for my mom to save me and say something and protect me. And she never did. She didn't have the courage or the voice to ever say anything to stand up to him, to stop what was going on or to change the circumstances at home. And so when I was growing up, I just thought that was normal. That's how life was. I didn't know any different, that it could be any different in a home. And as a result, I was very depressed. Yeah, very sad. And like when I was young, the only thing that I ever prayed for, I did pray a lot, you know, was just to be happy. It was a really simple request to not live in that conflict and chaos that I lived in. And when I found out that I could get out of that house by going to college, I started putting all of my efforts into school. School came naturally for me. I was always a good student because I always wanted to be a good girl. And so I always did well in school, but then I learned, oh, if I keep doing well in school, I can go to college. And nobody in my family had gone to college, so it wasn't like I had any mentors at home to follow. But I learned how to, you know, apply for some grants and get some loans and how to apply for college, and that's what I did. And so at 18, I moved out of my house, and that's really when I would say life changed for me, right? I got to see a glimpse of... the world in a different perspective. You know, I met some really wonderful people who are still my friends today and who now, you know, my partner that I'm married to and just saw how things could be different. And so I thought I had, you know, escaped my home. Life was wonderful. Things are, you know, I'm doing really well and I'm really happy. And that took a turn. Speaker 5 (5:25) I would say, you know, after I got married, things started going downhill and I couldn't figure it out. I didn't know why I was feeling angry all the time and feeling sad all the time. And then I gave birth to my daughter. And, you know, when you have a child, everybody talked about how this was supposed to be this magical experience. And I was just constantly worried and just. always worried about like being like hurting her, right? Like that, that disease that my dad had that passed on to me and I was going to do something to her. And so I, I couldn't be present with her. I couldn't just enjoy her. And so I started therapy. And again, since a lot of different healing modalities, working through a lot of different things and signing my voice, like acknowledging what had happened to me, you know, coming out with it. to myself through therapy and, you know, now publicly, the only thing that's happened through that process is that I've become stronger, more empowered. I feel good in my own skin. I have better relationships. And so now that's why I'm on such a mission to share that with other women and share kind of the power of speaking out and the transformation it can have in your life. Speaker 3 (6:48) You know, So many survivors are silent. And isn't that also kind of what the predator or the perp kind of pushes? They force the person into silence, especially with shame? Speaker 5 (7:04) Yeah, that is a natural consequence of it. The silence comes because you are so ashamed as to what happened to you. You also feel like... You are all alone. Like this doesn't happen to anybody else. It only happened to you. And so you keep, you know, you don't want anybody to know about it. And I think that's what's so amazing. When I started, you know, doing this work and coming out to myself as to what had happened, you know, the statistics, it's like one in two women have experienced some sort of sexual violence in their life. It's like shocking, right? Half of us. And Speaker 4 (7:39) I Speaker 5 (7:39) actually think that number is low because of Speaker 4 (7:42) the Speaker 5 (7:42) underreporting that occurs. The only way to change that is to talk about it and to, you know, flip the script. Like, we shouldn't be the ones that are feeling the shame. We should be putting it back on the person who did it. Speaker 4 (7:53) That's right. First of all, I'm really sorry that you went through that. That's just absolutely horrific. And I, too, have been through much, much, much abuse and sexual abuse from all sorts. And so I... I cannot actually honestly say I understand, you know, where you're coming from. And the hardest part about all that is just rising that fear, you know, the fear of saying something, the fear of retribution, the fear of consequences. And I, too, never said anything at all. And it took me till I was 42 to actually say something. And once I did, oh, my God, like it was unbelievable. Speaker 4 (8:37) I'm really glad that you found your voice through therapy early on and that you are doing what you do to help others rise and be that light for those that are still in the dark. Thank you. Speaker 5 (8:50) Yeah. Thank you for doing the same. And I'm glad you said that, right? Just like before you do it, you don't think it's possible, right? It's like, Speaker 4 (8:58) I Speaker 5 (8:58) can never say it. I could, you know, never let this out. And then once you do, you're like, oh, wow. Speaker 3 (9:04) Well, I would imagine what you've experienced has really been a catalyst for representing survivors. I would think that that has really given you the torch you're carrying to help these survivors, to give them a voice, to get them justice. Speaker 5 (9:20) Yeah, you know, I think for me, the catalyst and it could be, you know, the abuse itself, but I think the big part of it is how silent my mom was, right? Like, I think that's a big catalyst for me, but I never wanted to be that. And now with any injustice, I can't keep my mouth shut. I can't not say anything because I think that's something I wanted for so long. And then the other piece of it is my own silence, right? As I'm the youngest of 10 kids. And so there's seeing things happen to your siblings and also not saying anything. And I know I was a child and I've worked through that, but that also was a big impetus. Like I didn't say anything when I was a kid for all of these things that were going on in the home. And my mom didn't say anything. And so just wanting to not do that again. Right. And so I let it all out. I let people know when they have harmed somebody else that has, you know, given me the honor to represent them. They're not just going to get away with it. Speaker 3 (10:19) Sure. Speaker 2 (10:23) Stay tuned for more of Women Road Warriors coming up. Speaker 1 (10:30) Dean Michael, the tax doctor here. I have one question for you. Do you want to stop worrying about the IRS? If the answer is yes, then look no further. I've been around for years. I've helped countless people across the country, and my success rate speaks for itself. So now you know where to find good, honest help with your tax problems. What are you waiting for? If you owe more than $10,000 to the IRS, or haven't filed in years, call me now at 888-557-4020, or go to mytaxhelpmd.com for a free consultation and get your life back. Welcome Speaker 2 (11:04) back to Women Road Warriors with Shelly Johnson and Kathy Takaro. Speaker 3 (11:12) If you're enjoying this informative episode of Women Road Warriors, I wanted to mention Kathy and I explore all kinds of topics that will power you on the road to success. We feature a lot of expert interviews. Plus, we feature celebrities and women who've been trailblazers. Please check out our podcast at womenroadwarriors.com and click on our episodes page. We're also available wherever you listen to podcasts on all the major podcast channels like Spotify, Apple, YouTube, Amazon Music, Audible. You name it. Check us out and bookmark our podcast. Also, don't forget to follow us on social media. We're on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, LinkedIn, YouTube, and other sites. And tell others about us. We want to help as many women as possible. We're talking with attorney, best-selling author, and survivor advocate, Alreen Hedquist, who spent over 20 years fighting for survivors of sexual assault, sexual harassment, workplace discrimination, retaliation, and wrongful termination. The statistics are staggering. One in two women have experienced some sort of sexual violence in their life, but too many don't tell anybody. They remain silent. Silence could be one of the most powerful weapons an abuser has. Fear, shame, and the belief that no one will understand keeps survivors from speaking about what has happened for years or even decades. Alreen knows that silence personally. She endured sexual, physical, and verbal abuse as a child and carried that trauma without telling anybody. But the story didn't end there. She eventually found her voice and built a career around helping other people find theirs. Today, after more than 20 years as an attorney, she's helped survivors confront powerful people and institutions and seek accountability for what happened to them. Alreen's story is about what can happen when silence finally gives way to a voice. You know, Alreen, survivors need that voice to get justice. Too often it's Speaker 4 (13:11) been blame the victim. And I think Speaker 3 (13:13) that that's also why people don't come out and say something