#3562 RHOSLC S7E3: I Left My Toothbrush in San Francisco - Live in KC!

Watch What Crappens

The hosts kick off their live "In The Mix" tour in Kansas City before diving into a recap of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 7, Episode 3. They dissect Lisa

Key takeaways

• Lisa Barlow claims she was invited to the Oscars every year and handled red carpet commentary for E! People, which the hosts immediately mock as a delusional fabrication.
• Whitney Rose reveals that Kwai (Ashley) once used her fiancé's toothbrush to clean a toilet bowl after finding texts about him cheating, then returned it to him anyway.
• Angie Safaei hands out individually wrapped toothbrushes to the entire group on a trolley, citing hygiene fears directly sparked by Whitney's gossip.
• Heather Gay calls Kwai
• and
• after Kwai claims Heather was intense toward Meredith Marks during an earlier confrontation.

Main topics

• RHOSLC Season 7 Episode 3 Recap
• Lisa Barlow's Oscars Claims
• Whitney Rose & Kwai/Ashley Conflict

Notable quotes

"I get invited like every year... I was actually in the control room. So like Bron was on camera, but I was actually controlling that entire telecast."

Conclusion

The hosts use this recap to highlight the franchise's reliance on manu

Transcript preview

Speaker 1 (0:00) Justice Speaker 3 (0:24) Peach life, sweet life, the peach life, life, life, life. Speaker 4 (0:40) Now what else is going on? Speaker 2 (1:28) Hello Kansas City! Speaker 1 (1:33) Welcome to the kickoff night of the In The Mix Tour. Speaker 4 (1:38) First night. First night, you guys. Speaker 1 (1:41) First night. Our first night back. Real quickly, are there any McBees in the audience? Speaker 1 (1:49) Great. Has anyone killed any chickens recently? Okay, it's a safe house. Speaker 4 (1:57) Safe space. It's a safe Speaker 1 (1:59) spot. Speaker 4 (1:59) You guys, this is a magical place, Kansas City. It is. Speaker 4 (2:05) Literally today, we were walking. We went to eat. Oh, my God. Well, we're Speaker 1 (2:09) going Speaker 4 (2:09) to have coffee at this really good place. And we're walking down the road, and Ben said, what is that man doing to that pigeon? Speaker 1 (2:19) It's true because there was a pigeon in the middle of the street walking on the double yellow lines and there was someone... It was drunk. It was Shannon Bedore. Oh, well. Speaker 2 (2:32) I'm just going to take a little walk. Speaker 3 (2:33) A Speaker 1 (2:34) little hoo-hoo. What, David? Speaker 1 (2:39) The pigeon was just walking and there was a guy, I don't know what the term is, but he had like the Speaker 2 (2:45) yellow... A picker-upper guy. Speaker 1 (2:46) Yeah, he had like the yellow, like sanitation worker, yellow shirt, and he had the prong with the picker-upper thing, the claw, you know? Speaker 4 (2:54) You don't want to get your hands dirty. So he was... trying to pick up this pigeon. And Ben's like, what is that guy doing to the pigeon? He had a Speaker 1 (3:02) trash bag and he had the claw around the back of the pigeon. And I was like, are you going to throw the pigeon in the trash? Speaker 4 (3:09) And it was one of those moments like, do we interfere? Because, like, what do you do? Like, if it's a kid, you know, like, you are Speaker 3 (3:16) abusing that child. Speaker 4 (3:18) You know, you're supposed to say something. Yeah. Or like terrorism, see something, say something. Or do we say something? I mean, it's a pigeon, you know. So he had this big moral quandary, and I was like, maybe he's helping the pigeon. You guys, he was helping the fucking pigeon. He Speaker 1 (3:31) was helping. He Speaker 4 (3:31) was pushing the pigeon. He Speaker 1 (3:33) was guiding the pigeon with a claw like this. The pigeon was Speaker 4 (3:35) limping. How the pigeon got that way, I don't know. Get out of the road, first of all. I Speaker 1 (3:40) know. He guided the sweet little pigeon to the sidewalk, got it onto the sidewalk, and then he just walked away. And we're like, Kansas City. What a Speaker 4 (3:50) magical place. Speaker 4 (3:53) Also... Not every city you would see that. Where we're from, you get the fucking thing with the trashing, you bang it on the head, you throw it in the... Speaker 1 (4:00) We love coming to the Midwest. The Midwesterners are so nice. Speaker 1 (4:06) Paula, where's Paula? That's you, Paula. Paula brought a giant tin of cookies for us. Thank you. Paula! And then someone, I don't know if this was you too, Paula, but someone brought me Ina Garten socks. Speaker 4 (4:22) Is that you? Thank you. And Bueller socks. Speaker 1 (4:25) And Bueller socks. My Speaker 4 (4:27) God. We have Speaker 1 (4:27) to represent the true queen here. I have to say, I don't know if you guys saw my Instagram stories from yesterday, but I went through hell and high water. To get here. And it's been all worth it for just these socks. I'll tell you that much. Speaker 4 (4:42) Socks and cookies. Way to a man's heart. Yes. Well, I was leaving the hotel today to get some water right by me. There's a convenience store. And I walked out and there was a wing bone, a chicken wing bone just on the ground. I thought, man, birds really have it rough in this fucking town. What are you doing? Speaker 1 (5:03) That bird was on the road because it's like, please, there's a giant predator on this sidewalk. The road is my safety. And now, oh well. Speaker 4 (5:11) Welcome to Watch What Crappens! Speaker 4 (5:19) Tonight, we're recovering, you guys. We are. It's not that dire. Can you tell I'm nervous? I can't believe I'm fucking nervous. Speaker 1 (5:27) It's exciting. How are Speaker 4 (5:28) we doing this? How long has it been? It feels like it's been 30 years. Speaker 1 (5:32) I know. I know. We haven't done a live recap since last year. All right. Look, everyone loves you. We're Speaker 2 (5:40) going to Speaker 1 (5:40) do it. Speaker 2 (5:40) We're going to do this. You are the most pessimistic person ever about recapping. Speaker 4 (5:46) Is Galena here? Is Galena here from McBee Dynasty? God damn it. I shouldn't have asked that. I'm going to be upset before we even started. Galena, I know you are close. Speaker 4 (5:59) Always feel free to come to me. Speaker 1 (6:02) Wait, did anyone here watch Big Brother? Speaker 1 (6:06) You know the red-headed girl, Haley? You know, she's a local, right? Speaker 1 (6:13) She was on my flight yesterday. I will say that. And the flight, we missed our connection, and I did not tell her about the new flight that I got on. Speaker 4 (6:23) And bam Speaker 1 (6:25) I didn't like her. Speaker 4 (6:28) The pigeon got more respect than this poor... Speaker 1 (6:31) I would have had that pigeon on my Southwest flight, but I was not going to get thogs. Point is... Speaker 3 (6:37) Previously on the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Speaker 4 (6:45) Welcome to Opry Ski with Lisa B. Speaker 3 (6:47) Yay! Speaker 3 (6:52) I love skiing. It's so chic. Jessica Albee taught me to ski. Speaker 2 (6:57) Stop lying, Lisa. In this sisterhood, we do not lie. I'm so sick Speaker 3 (7:05) of being bullied. Speaker 2 (7:06) I'm sick Speaker 3 (7:07) of it. I'm a ski. I'm a skier. I ski. Speaker 1 (7:13) No one lies more than Lisa Barlow. I am Greek. Speaker 1 (7:20) If by liar you mean skier, then you're Speaker 4 (7:22) right. I ski. Watch. Oh my God, I hate skiing. Get me down this hill. Speaker 2 (7:31) I want to introduce you guys to the new girl, someone who is like a real sister to me, and I won't betray her in less than one episode. Speaker 2 (7:46) Hi, Speaker 4 (7:47) I'm Kwai. My husband looks like Rush Limbaugh and has a mystery job somewhere in Florida that I know nothing about. And I own a mountain and I ride a motorcycle. I'm that girl. Speaker 2 (7:59) I will not be skiing because I have a toddler Speaker 4 (8:03) at home. Speaker 3 (8:06) Oh yeah? Well, I have a new boyfriend at home. I hired him on Angie's list years ago. Speaker 3 (8:15) He cheated on me and I just hired him again from Angie's List. Speaker 2 (8:24) Well, I have a new boyfriend too. And his name is Model. And he is not old and gross like Todd. And he does get boners. And it's a new chapter for me. Speaker 3 (8:39) What? I have a new relationship too. with alcohol Speaker 3 (8:51) Murdered. Speaker 3 (8:55) I called you a cut fitness and a bitch and said I hated you. Speaker 3 (9:01) It was at a drag brunch. It wasn't me. It was the devil. Speaker 3 (9:08) The devil's name is Speaker 2 (9:10) alcohol. Speaker 2 (9:13) That's a cheap excuse, and I do not accept Speaker 1 (9:17) your apology. But Speaker 3 (9:19) I love your facelift. And your wig. I Speaker 2 (9:24) do not wear a wig. Speaker 3 (9:28) Bad Margarita, bad! Speaker 1 (9:31) Guys, guys, let Meredith work through her feelings. Shut Speaker 3 (9:35) up, lying Lisa Barlow. Speaker 1 (9:37) No one lies more than Lisa Barlow. I am Greek. You already said that. Liar. Everyone's bullying me. And scene. Speaker 1 (9:50) you Speaker 1 (9:53) Yeah, so much goes on on that show. So much. By the way, could you guys remember, we forgot to remind you to make sure the Zoom is recording it back. We have not been on the road for a long time, so we got to make sure everything is recording right now. Thank you very much. Thank you. All right, everyone. Let's get into Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, season seven, episode three, Little Green Leprechaun, Big Dirty Secret. Speaker 1 (10:24) Awwwww. It's a big dirty secret. You know what? Some secrets are small, some are really big, okay? Speaker 3 (10:31) That's a big leprechaun. Speaker 1 (10:34) Fucking Heather. Whoa, I didn't know that lepers could be cons, but whoa, anyone could be a criminal. I'll tell you what, if anyone's gonna con anyone, Speaker 4 (10:47) it's gonna be a leper. Speaker 3 (10:50) He'll be like, your arm's falling off. Wah, Speaker 2 (10:52) wah, wah. You don't get $5 from me. Whoa. Speaker 4 (10:55) He Speaker 2 (10:56) said he had a hand, but guess what? It fell off. Sounds like a con job to me. Speaker 4 (11:03) Okay, Ben has been out of town and didn't get to even recap the last Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Speaker 1 (11:10) I know, it was very sad. Well, I'm excited because I feel like this is the third episode of the season and the first one was a very serious, moving episode and then I missed last week. And so now I'm like, oh, it's the first super fun episode I get to dive into. So I'm excited. I'm also curious about this Kwai woman. Why? Why is she not a full-time housewife? Do we know why? Well, I Speaker 3 (11:35) quite know that her fashion is really bad. Mm-hmm. What'd she say? I quite... What'd she say? I'll tell you why. She dresses terribly. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Speaker 1 (11:45) I'm assuming something terrible is going to come out about her, and Bravo's like, yeah, we got to order, right? We're just waiting for that to happen. Yeah, Speaker 4 (11:51) her first scene where she's like, oh, yeah, I'm married to this guy. No idea what he does. Somewhere in Florida. He's never really here. He's in Florida. No idea. And you see the guy's like, jail. You're going to jail. She's going Speaker 1 (12:06) to jail. Speaker 4 (12:07) It's happening. I feel like a judge in a Tom Cruise movie. Like, I already know the crime is going to happen. Your ass is going to prison. Rush. Speaker 1 (12:15) You, like, literally can't even handle the truth. Yeah. Speaker 4 (12:19) That Speaker 1 (12:19) was Speaker 4 (12:19) a different Tom Cruise movie. What's the one that he saw into the future? Minority Report. Speaker 3 (12:25) Yeah. Speaker 4 (12:26) Minority Report. Speaker 3 (12:27) Well, Speaker 4 (12:28) it sounds like a walk Speaker 3 (12:30) in the neighborhood with Vicky. Yeah. More like John Jansen Report. Speaker 1 (12:41) I feel uncomfortable. I feel uncomfortable. I don't know what it is. I just feel uncomfortable. Um... Speaker 4 (12:47) All right. Okay. Go to a bar named Sue. No. Speaker 1 (12:53) Already now. Don't they have enough suing that happened on this show? So we're at this place. It's like a real, like, you know, you show up on your hog. And in fact, Kwai shows up on her hog, shows up on her motorcycle, takes off her helmet and her hair. It's like Leanne locking around and stuff. Speaker 1 (13:13) I'm quiet. I have a motorcycle. Speaker 4 (13:17) Whitney comes, a bar named Sue. I can't, every time I see that, I get angry. Why do I get angry? I have an aunt named Sue. Do you think that she wants to be a bar? She doesn't. So we see them arriving, and then we go to Heather and Lisa, and they're shopping. This is that scene. Every season, this show starts over again, where Heather's like, me Speaker 3 (13:38) and Lisa Barlow, we're just like sis. Speaker 4 (13:42) And then she just stabs her in the back and betrays her every two seconds. So we're having that kind of Speaker 1 (13:47) scene. And they're in some boutique where they're always like pawing through some shirts next to like a Jamba Juice. They're like, yeah, Speaker 2 (13:52) so what's new with you? Yeah, it's so good to Speaker 1 (13:55) see you. And Lisa's like, yeah, these looks, they're curated for the Oscars. Speaker 3 (14:00) Oh my God, are the Oscars even this weekend? Speaker 1 (14:04) I don't even know when they are. Speaker 3 (14:08) Are you going to the Oscars, Lisa Speaker 1 (14:10) Barlow? No, normally I do. Like, I famously always, they wanted me to be a presenter at the Oscars this year. You know? And I was like, I would be so perfect for one battle after another. It's like being on this cast. Or Sinners. But unfortunately, I just couldn't make it. Yeah. Wait, Speaker 3 (14:28) you. go to the Oscars, Lisa Barlow? Speaker 1 (14:31) Yeah, yeah. I do the red carpet. I present. I win. I've got like five Oscars that I've won. Yeah. Speaker 3 (14:38) Name one Oscar film. Speaker 1 (14:42) Lawrence of Serbia. Speaker 1 (14:45) Chariots of Water, Schindler's Notepad. All Speaker 3 (14:50) right, I'll give you that one. I'll give you that one. Speaker 4 (14:56) By Speaker 1 (14:57) the way, notepad is good. Speaker 4 (14:59) That's like the 2026 version of Schindler's List. Like our attention spans are so gone. It's just like Schindler's sticky. Schindler's sticky. There was a couple of people that got in trouble. All right, roll the credits. We've got TikTok attention spans. But Speaker 1 (15:14) also like what like rando boutique in the strip mall down like three stops down from Beauty Lab and Laser has looks that are curated for the Oscars. Speaker 1 (15:27) Yeah, yeah, Blake's gonna be in here shopping soon. Speaker 4 (15:33) I'll take an awesome blossom. I'll wear an awesome thing. No, that is an onion ring meal, man. Speaker 1 (15:39) And then, you know, Heather sort of has turned into the villain on this show, which I'm totally down for. But I was on her side when she just looked at Lisa like, hmm? And she had this look and she just kept it and they kept cutting back to it. They went to a whole other scene and then they flashed back. Meanwhile, at the boutique, I was still either going, hmm? Speaker 4 (15:59) I'm trying to be nice to you, Lisa Barlow. It's like, what? Speaker 3 (16:02) I go to the Oscars. I've been invited. I'm invited every year. I totally got, I'm there right now. Yeah. Hi. Yeah. Would like to thank my agent, Ben Affleck, Matt Duman, but whatever. I don't care. Thank you so much. It's such hard work. Speaker 1 (16:18) Yeah, it's Speaker 2 (16:18) great. I love being Speaker 1 (16:19) there. So we see Mary and she's overseeing a housekeeper or a cousin preparing snacks. Speaker 1 (16:31) You know Speaker 4 (16:32) that that person is not being paid. Mary is going to stay problematic. She has real horrible things going on in her life. That does not automatically make you a better person. Speaker 1 (16:43) Yeah. Speaker 4 (16:45) And God bless her for it. This poor cousin, this distant cousin, Mary's probably got her passport or her credit card or something hidden. Speaker 1 (16:53) She's just trying to put out some better cheddars. And Mary's like, uh-uh, not like that. Not Speaker 4 (16:57) like that. Mary's like, do it with love. And she's like, uh, like this? No, no, I'll do it. You have to do it with love. And then Mary just slams him on the plate too. They're not crackers that line Speaker 1 (17:10) up well on a plate. They're not. They're not. They're not ergonomic. Well, that's not even ergonomic. But they're not ergonomic either. So then we go back to Heather and Lisa. And Heather goes, so you really been invited to the Oscars? Speaker 2 (17:22) Yeah. And you just never went? Yeah. No, it's like hard. Speaker 4 (17:27) It's like work. Like when you're a big person like me, it's really difficult. It's not just like glamour. It's like people Speaker 3 (17:34) needing things. It's hard. It's hard. Speaker 2 (17:37) So can I have your ticket for the sisterhood? Speaker 4 (17:41) No, it doesn't work like that. You don't understand. You don't understand people like me. You're too small. Little people don't understand big awards. Speaker 1 (17:50) So then we go back to Mary's house and she talks about how she's been compartmentalizing since the passing of her son and she's just trying to throw herself back into life. Did you say Mary or Meredith? Mary. Scared me. I'm also compartmentalizing into a bathtub. Speaker 4 (18:08) Because Meredith is good. Meredith finally comes out of the closet this season about so many things. Yeah. She's a DJ. Speaker 4 (18:18) We've never heard about it before. Finally, she's like, well, Speaker 3 (18:21) I have something new. I'm a DJ. Speaker 4 (18:24) We know, girl. I got facelifts. We know. You've had a facelift every year. Why are you pretending you just got your first facelift? She's hilarious. Like, well, I think it's very important for a woman to speak. Speaker 4 (18:43) When she has a facelift. You have been speaking for 19 years on this show, and every time it's with a different face. And it's better each time. Who is her doctor? You look amazing. Speaker 1 (18:54) I know. She really is. They're doing great work there. The wig work may need some improvement, but the face. The face is killing it. You know, the wigs, that's okay. Wigs can be changed. They can be shifted. They can fall off. It's okay. Did Speaker 4 (19:06) you see today, someone was like, oh, Meredith's doll hair, whatever, they were making fun of her wig. They're like, I hate Meredith. And she's like, Speaker 3 (19:13) oh, well, every woman who's ever been on this show has worn a wig. I am so sorry that you're so offended and bored. Speaker 3 (19:24) I'll be honest. Speaker 1 (19:27) I feel like she does that at Starbucks, too. Here's your grande. Well, I'm sorry that I ordered a grande. Like, everyone's done it before. Okay. Speaker 4 (19:38) We're not even there yet. I'm just jumping now. I know. Okay, so now we go back to Heather and Lisa shopping. No, we don't. What are we doing? Oh, we're at Angie and Mary. Oh, we're talking about a motorcycle. Speaker 1 (19:46) Yeah, we're at Angie and Mary's, like, you know, it's sad. Speaker 4 (19:51) Okay, so Bron... Speaker 1 (19:52) Well, Angie comes in, by the way. We love Angie, but she comes in with this orchid and she has a giant picture of Robert there. And I was like, Angie. And Mary's like, I can't do photos too soon. It's just too soon. And Angie's like, uh-huh. Take the photo off, Angie. She Speaker 4 (20:09) faces the photo away from her. She just turns the orchid. She's like, but it is an orchid. Speaker 4 (20:18) Okay, well, thanks for the flower. Get the picture out of here. So it's actually a really nice scene and they're still friends. I can't wait to see what happens in this one. And you know it's going to be something stupid because Mary just, she gets upset in a relationship over the craziest things. Do you remember when she got really upset with Whitney because she was calling Whitney like 10 times a day and Whitney was doing carpool and she's like, how dare you? Speaker 1 (20:44) Little girl. Speaker 1 (20:48) So, obviously, actually, I think in that moment was the bobblehead. I don't know what it was. But Angie. Little girl. Both little girl bobblehead, two great Mary Cosby-isms. So, Mary's basically like, so, what have I been missing? And Angie's like, well, you know how Lisa invited everyone to go non-Greek skiing. So, Lisa brought her friend Ashley and introduced her to the group. And Mary already is like, please tell me she's better than Brittany. Speaker 1 (21:18) Please. Speaker 4 (21:18) That reaction. If she's anything like Britney. And Andy's like, ha, ha, ha, ha. Greek laugh, Greek laugh. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Speaker 3 (21:27) Ha, ha. Speaker 4 (21:28) Then we go to Bronwyn, Ashley, and Whitney back at a bar named Sue. And Ashley's Kwai. I have to call her Kwai. Why do they call her Ashley? You can't call someone Kwai and then start calling them Ashley, too. It's Kwai. You're going to go with quiet, go with quiet. If I came up to you and I'm like, my name's Ronnie, but call me Steve. Speaker 1 (21:48) Fuck, who are you? This is probably why Kawhi is not a full-time housewife. They couldn't figure out what her name would be in the titles. Like, you know what? Just tell her. Speaker 2 (21:55) She's not. That's what I was saying before. Speaker 1 (21:57) She's full-time. She's a friend of? She Speaker 4 (22:02) is a friend of? Speaker 1 (22:04) And it's weird. It is weird. She feels very full time. And so I'm wondering, like, are we going to see a lot of her and then she'll peter off? Does she quit halfway through? Or is it like something problematic is going to come out about her that Bravo knows? And I was like, OK, we're waiting. That Rush Limbaugh has been prison. Speaker 4 (22:19) It's time for a commercial. It's time Speaker 3 (22:22) for a crappin's commercial. Speaker 4 (22:26) Okay, so the friend of is like, wow, Bromwyn and Whitney, how did you guys meet? And they're like, um, Lisa, Lisa. I better lock with people that Lisa introduces me to. But I do it, Lisa. Speaker 3