#3536 Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip S506 Part Two: Time To Let Lu-se

Watch What Crappens

In this second part of a two-part recap, the cast of The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip heads to Miami, where Luann's increasingly unhinged

Key takeaways

• Luann's unfiltered, drunken monologues become a comedic highlight, showcasing her larger-than-life persona and self-empowerment through absurdity.

Main topics

• Luann's chaotic behavior at the Miami girls trip

Notable quotes

"We want you to zipline in. We want two guys dressed like bushes."

Conclusion

The episode ends with Luann's delirious celebration and her monologue do

Transcript preview

Speaker 1 (0:21) and welcome to Watch What Happens. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're like, hey, wait a minute, I didn't hear part one. Guys, it's because we put out a lot of recaps. Go back and listen to part one, okay? It's before this one. Bye. Enjoy the show. Okay, so some ladies head to the restroom. Alexia, Giselle, and Portia have a chat. And Alexia's like, okay, fill me in. What have you guys been doing? Which cities have you gone to? Who's fault? And let me tell you, whatever's happened, it's not Peter's fault. You know Peter. You know, he didn't mean it. I'm telling you right now. Speaker 4 (0:58) Peter, he's a really good judge of character. So Giselle is like, well, we started in Orange County. And Marisol, by the way, is giving out bedazzled cups. I have got Speaker 1 (1:10) bedazzled cockies for everybody. It's for me. I don't know if you guys have seen my show. It's pretty bad. I have a bedazzled cup whenever. It's cocky. So you only have one with your name on it. Speaker 4 (1:24) Vicky's like, we got to clean up. The birds are going to come. The birds are going to come. And then they cut to this like one seagull just strolling along on the beach very slowly, which I don't know, I thought was so funny. And then Giselle is like, so we went to Beverly Hills and Kyle had a nice white party. And then we went to Atlanta and it was fun. And Lex is like, oh, I heard that Nini's back. That's great. You know, like, I don't know if you know this, but Nini is the second person to come back after a long pause after, of course, all of us. So we're still number one, you know? And then they talk about Vicky. Portia's like, Vicky, you know, like, you left the party. Like, why'd you leave the party? She's like, it was time to go. It was time to go. Time for the quiet game. Turned on the TV and quiet game was starting. So, time to go. Speaker 1 (2:01) Yeah, but Speaker 3 (2:02) you Speaker 1 (2:02) know what I was thinking about? Are you talking about last night? Yes, Vicky. What do you think they're talking about? She's like, yeah, you left my party. She's like, well, you know, I had to go. My leg hurt. I got back. You know what? I got back. My knee was so huge. It was huge. And I was not finding my people to talk to. I was not finding my people. Everywhere I turned, there were just people I wanted to kick out of my neighborhood. I just didn't understand it. Speaker 1 (2:27) And I was Speaker 4 (2:28) just Speaker 1 (2:28) watching up to people saying, do you belong in this neighborhood? Show me your address. Show me your address. And then they started filming me on TikTok calling me Karen. I really don't appreciate that. Who's Karen? Who is Karen? Speaker 4 (2:40) Well, you have to honor the OGs. So then Portia was saying like, well, were you, what was the real feeling that you felt out of place or that your leg hurt? She goes, well, the real feeling, first of all, is that like, I wasn't feeling well. And second of all. I just kept standing there by myself. And I'd like go over there. And then like I'd go over there. And then we'd all go over there. And I just felt like out of place. And Portia's like, but why did you feel out of place? And Giselle's like, yes. Why did you feel out of place, Vicky? Come on. Articulate exactly what it was. She's like, I don't know. I just, you know how sometimes you just sort of get out of place? And they're both like, no. Speaker 1 (3:14) You know how sometimes you're driving and then you go over trade tracks and then suddenly you're like, oh my God, I'm not in the right neighborhood. What neighborhood am I in? Get me out of this daybreak. That's how I felt. You know what I mean? They're like, no. Could you explain it a little bit Speaker 2 (3:27) more? Speaker 1 (3:28) Okay. Look, I feel like... Just someone call it out. Please, someone call it out. So Portia basically gives her an acceptable answer. Meanwhile, which is... Were you mad that they didn't celebrate Speaker 3 (3:44) you, Speaker 1 (3:45) Vicky? But meanwhile, Teresa and Vicky are walking back and a mannequin fell. Speaker 1 (3:51) Teresa's like, Speaker 3 (3:52) wait, I wanted a mannequin style. Speaker 1 (3:54) It's like, oh my God, her head fell off. So then we go back to Portia and she's like, were you jealous that Nini was being celebrated? No, I don't get jealous. I don't get jealous. Yeah, but they didn't celebrate you on the OC and they did celebrate Nini. Do you Speaker 3 (4:07) feel bad about that? Speaker 1 (4:08) It's like, oh, well, I guess I don't need attention. I've got, stop, stop giving me. If you don't need attention, then you wouldn't have walked around to everybody saying. i can't stay here nobody's being nice to me you literally left the party because you didn't get attention and now you're saying you don't need attention come on Speaker 4 (4:22) yeah exactly and then lisa's like hey guys wait hold on a second where's luanne and this is where we see luanne talking to this random dude on a bike just like the shirtless guy like hey there she's like oh so where are you from you know i love latin guys you know why because i've never been to argentina so i just love latin you know what i love I love a dead language. I love a dead language. Never made me feel more alive. Wow. I have a question. If you were to be sent back in time, and you went to Rome, would you be able to talk with him? Because you're Latin. Tell me everything. What's Speaker 2 (4:54) it Speaker 4 (4:54) like in Argentina? Where is Argentina anyway? Is it in Europe? Is it in Greenland? It's Speaker 2 (4:58) in Speaker 4 (4:58) Greenland. I knew it. I knew it all along. Speaker 2 (5:02) You know another language I've always really wanted to learn was wingdings. You know anybody from wingdings? That Speaker 4 (5:07) would be great. Speaker 4 (5:10) What's your name? Speaker 2 (5:12) Symbols, give me some stories, original Bible, what even happened in it? Tell me, Latin person. Speaker 4 (5:18) Hey, what's your name? Jose. Jose. Jose all day. See, that rhymes. You know when you're a songwriter like I am, you look for the rhyme. Okay, have a great day. Jose all day. Whoa, three for one. Speaker 2 (5:29) Well, I could really swallow a glass of Jose right now. I'm all right. Jose all day. Speaker 1 (5:37) All right, great. Say Speaker 4 (5:38) you tell all your friends you met an icon today. Have a great day. So back at the table, Giselle's like, Vicky, did you want to get carried in like Mimi got carried in? She's like, no, no, no, that's extra. I'm not that good. I don't want to be carried in at all. It's like, but it's okay if you did die. I said, no, no, I didn't feel that way. Look, I'm not jealous. I'm a lot of things, but I'm not jealous of me coming in on a flying carpet, like not coming in on a flying carpet. So Lisa's like, Vicky. I just like want people to beg me to be part of the group. Like they're begging you. It's like a good thing. Does anyone want to beg for me to be here? Anyone? Speaker 1 (6:16) Forrest is like, okay, do you want the attention on you now, Lisa? She's like, oh, no, but you know what I mean? Like she should feel flattered because we're asking her questions. That's all I'm saying. And Forrest is like, yeah, you might want to sit this one out. Speaker 4 (6:30) Wait, wait a second. Girls, girls, girls. I just got back from talking to a very hot man named Jose who speaks Latin. The language is alive, it turns out. Anyway, I'm just going to say this. Can I say this? I'm going to say it. Can I say it? I'm going to say it. Even though we've been on the franchise for so long, all of us, you starting it off, Vicky, you know, we want to see you come in on a zip line. We want to see you come in on a chariot. We want to see you come in singing an iconic song that lifts women up. Preferably on the zipline and Kyle's party. We want to see you do all those things because only a true icon would do something like that. Am I right? Am I right? Listen, Speaker 2 (7:03) here's what we want. We want you to zipline in. We want two guys dressed like bushes. You guys pretend you're guys dressed like bushes. All right. Hold me up. Lisa, lift me. All right. Here I come. All right. I'm singing an iconic song. All right. Hit it, boys. Speaker 4 (7:16) Even though you're first, we want you to do what I do. Okay? Does that sound good? Speaker 2 (7:21) Be an icon. Just be more of an icon. Listen, it's like I told Bette Midler. Enough with the picking up the freeway trash. Be an icon already. Speaker 4 (7:29) I mean, from a distance. How about you get up close? Get with the people. I'm not here to take you down, believe me. Your cast already did a great job with that. Ha! Remember? Remember when Tamra walked in and said you're a bitch, then Chan said you're a bitch, then you cried? Oh, that was great. Anyway, I won't take you down. I like to lift women up. That's what I'm famous for. Everyone knows. Countess Luan, the woman who lifts women up. And the best way to lift women up is if they're talking to a hot guy, you get right in there and you talk to that hot guy too to show that you made a good choice. That's how you lift someone up. And then if you steal that hot guy, that's your way of saying, hey, young lady, now you've got some free time. you've been lifted up by me countess luanne listen Speaker 2 (8:06) just think one of my Speaker 1 (8:07) songs if you need to be inspired about something Speaker 2 (8:09) i mean listen the lyrics say lovey boy savoy blah blah blah blah blah blah walk around the block cross it cross the red light watch both ways or traffic's gonna hit you probably whatever the lyrics are you guys know them but it's an iconic song lifts women i Speaker 4 (8:24) mean Chic C'est La Vie is honestly a feminist anthem. I mean, when was the last time you heard a song telling Kelly Bentham directly within the lyrics to bring jelly beans somewhere? That is called female empowerment. Speaker 1 (8:38) Because like, oh my God, Luann has a song about everything. You could say like, I need some more bread at the table. And she's like, I got a song about it, which is true. Luann's making everything about herself and she won't shut up. And they're trying to have this talk with Vicky and they keep jumping. I'm like, okay, Luann, the great point. Great, great point about female empowerment. Speaker 2 (8:57) Well, I'll tell you what's a great point. I learned today because I'm so positive about women. I learned how to say Jose in Latin. Jose. You're welcome. Speaker 4 (9:07) Listen, let me tell you something about life. Something I've learned while being on the road, being a cabaret star, having such stars as the late Shelley Duvall and Bette Midler's daughter and various other people not be part of the show, but be part of my thoughts during the show. I realized, you know what? It's about learning. It's about growing and becoming a better human in the universe. Give me that fucking megaphone I'm about to make and blow all your... fucking minds off so she takes this megaphone out of nowhere she's about to be like very empowering but then she can't figure out how to turn it off she's like no wait how do you turn this on would someone please empower this megaphone to turn on right now there Speaker 1 (9:47) gets the top button all right top button are you right just it's not working still it's not working okay the the top the top button all Speaker 2 (9:54) right got it Still not working. What the hell? Okay, I don't even need a megaphone. Here's what I was going to say to the megaphone. I'm not here to toot my horn. I'm here to toot your horn. Give me your horn to toot. All right? What are you, a tooth serbator? You need someone tooting your own kid over here. Speaker 4 (10:09) There. Your good Speaker 2 (10:11) self Jose'd right Your Speaker 4 (10:14) girls in the OC. What do they do for you shit? They did shit. Everybody tried to take you down Well, guess what Vicki maybe next time you should have a sold-out cabaret somewhere. Ha Speaker 1 (10:24) ha Speaker 1 (10:27) So Vicky's like, you know, I just, I don't need them to like kiss my butt or anything like that. I just, I just need respect. I need respect. Okay.