#3515 Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip S503: Bushwhacked

Watch What Crappens

In this episode of Watch What Crappens, the hosts dive into Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip S503: Bushwhacked, a bottle episode centered around Kyle's

Key takeaways

• Kyle's White Party is a long-running tradition that has evolved from birthday celebrations into a grand anniversary spectacle.

Main topics

• Kyle's White Party as a 20th-anniversary celebration
• Glamorous preparations amid chaos (e.g., power outage)

Notable quotes

'I've been doing white parties since 2004.'

'It's like a speck of dirt on this world.'

Conclusion

The episode captures the essence of Real Housewives' over-the-top culture through Kyle's extravagant White Party, blending

Transcript preview

Speaker 6 (0:21) Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast for all the crap we love to talk about on Ye Olde Broths. I'm Ronnie. That is Ben over there. Hello, Ben. Speaker 2 (0:34) Hello, birthday boy. I have to wish you happy birthday a second time because I know there are a lot of people who don't listen to, who don't watch Below Deck, and I would give you a big birthday thing over there, and I won't do it all as big over here. But I don't want people to be like, wow, I tuned in and Ben just didn't even wish Ronnie happy birthday. So I did do it on Below Deck, but I'm going to do it again because you can never be told happy birthday enough, Ronnie. The angel of the airwaves. Thank Speaker 6 (1:01) you, Ben. Thank Speaker 2 (1:01) you. Speaker 6 (1:01) Birthday. And RIP to Dolly Parton. What a bummer. Cheese. RIP. The world keeps throwing it. What the fuck, world? Cut it out. Love you, Dolly. Love you, Dolly. Love you, Speaker 3 (1:14) Dolly. Speaker 6 (1:14) It costs Speaker 3 (1:15) a lot of money to look this cheap. Speaker 6 (1:17) I love her. Amen. Amen. God bless. Sending it out to that little angel today. Welcome to Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip. If you want this on video, as usual, go over to Patreon. That's where you get our videos of all our recaps. You can also get bonus episodes. Speaker 6 (1:35) ad-free listening, access to our Discord server, and a free newsletter, which I write every week. It's just kind of a comedy recap of all this crap that we talk about. Ben is also coming out with a new YouTube show tomorrow called What's Your Order? on our YouTube, our Watch What Crappens YouTube. So I'm psyched to hear it. What's it like, Speaker 2 (1:55) Ben? Tell us. Well, let me tell you all about it. I hope you guys all go and check it out. We're trying to grow our YouTube channel. And so I am launching this show. It's called What's Your Order? Counting down top five of a Bravo subject. The first episode is top five craziest housewife dinner parties. And that's with Courtney Frayn from Two Judge Girls. The second episode is top five iconic Bravo locations with Eric Williams of That's A Gay Ass Podcast. The third one is. Top five one and done housewives with Kiki Monique of Reality Checked. So I'm going to drop all three of those tomorrow. And then there will be weekly drops. And it's going to be about an eight episode season. And next week we will have top five summer house characters or cast members with Julia Cunningham from Radio Andy. So, yeah, come check it out. It's really, really, really fun. And it's a nice way to spend 30 minutes of your time. Speaker 6 (2:51) Nice. Well, congratulations. I saw a little bit of it today. It looks amazing. Thank you so Speaker 2 (2:57) much. Speaker 6 (2:57) Enjoy, everybody. Go check that out at our YouTube. And today it is Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip. Speaker 2 (3:07) How exciting. It's a bottle episode. All took place at the White Party, at Kyle's famous White Party. Just all there. One big party. Yes, and Speaker 6 (3:22) I've been calling it White People Party for years, and I was cracking up that Portia called it White People Party. I felt hurt. Yep. That's a good old 15 years we've been saying that or whatever. How long has that show been on? 15 years, right? About Speaker 2 (3:39) 15 years, I think. 16? A little bit longer. I Speaker 6 (3:42) think Speaker 2 (3:42) it started in 2009. Speaker 6 (3:44) Well, we should know because we're going to see about 90,000 clips from it today. Speaker 2 (3:51) Yes. So we're at Beverly Hills and glam. Kyle's getting glam. And Kyle's checking in on what the temperature is going to be in Atlanta because that's where they're going next. And then. Speaker 2 (4:08) Kyle starts talking about the white party tonight and she's like, I've been doing white parties since 2004. Okay. uh 10 minutes later after all the clips and it was like originally for like mo and alexia's birthdays and it just like grew so big it was like overwhelming i really thought like i would never do another one again since the last white party i did was at sofa stadium has anyone else here done a party at sofa stadium no just me okay but since this is the 20th anniversary of the housewives i thought if i'm gonna have a party it's going to be a white party Speaker 6 (4:43) Yeah, Kyle's White Party. That SoFi Stadium one was sad. Remember? That was kind of Speaker 2 (4:49) a Speaker 6 (4:49) sad one. It was sad. People were stuck in the middle of this giant, vast, empty place. Also, SoFi Stadium generally is pretty far from, I think, wherever you... I don't know. I would have complained the whole time. Also, it was Kyle's Party, and your entertainment was Erica. So... Yeah. Speaker 2 (5:05) I don't know. It's like... It's a weird thing. Like you had a bunch of people in this party space. So I feel like that's cool. But then you sort of see this big stadium around you and I can't tell, does that like augment it or just emphasize how vast it is and how many more people you could have had? We're just Speaker 6 (5:24) a speck of dirt on this world. You know, that's one of those parties you look around and you're like, God, wait, there's, Speaker 2 (5:29) I'm so alone. I'm so alone. Someone else had a party at a stadium this season, this summer. And they pack them in, talking, of course, about... Speaker 2 (5:42) Taylor Swift and Travis Kelty, everyone. I mean, come on. I'm very ignorant. Oh, yeah. Speaker 6 (5:47) Tay-Tay. So she's like, you know, I have emotional moments because of my anniversary, but I'm looking forward to the distraction. Speaker 4 (5:56) You Speaker 6 (5:56) know, it's going to be fun. Also, it's the 20th anniversary, and I am the longest-running consecutive housewife, so I really need to bring it. Speaker 2 (6:03) Really need to bring it. Yeah. People are loving Kyle this season, by the way. I'm like, I think she's fine, but... People are loving her. So then we see Lisa's getting ready. She's like, oh my God, I can't believe like we blew a fuse. Guess what? Like we're like in the dark right now. Like, are you kidding me? We're in the Beverly Hills with no power and we're like glamming with like a flashlight. I'm like, well, Speaker 6 (6:25) it's not like city glam. So it's probably an improvement. Then we cut over to Teresa, who's FaceTiming with Melania, and she's like, Hey, Speaker 4 (6:34) Melania, I got the letter you sent me. That's all letters from magazines cut into words. I don't read it very well. She's like, give me the fucking money or Louie. You Speaker 6 (6:47) see her with Louie in a chokehold. Let Speaker 2 (6:52) my Speaker 3 (6:52) eggplant go. Bling, bling, bling, bling. Bling, bling, bling, bling. Speaker 2 (6:57) Then we go to Vicky's room and Vicky's like, she's like, I gotta like cramp. Oh my God, I got, it's hard to do everything for myself. Oh my God, I gotta like cramp. So she's injured even just getting glam somehow. And then Giselle goes over to see Lisa and Teresa and she's like, it's going down tonight, ladies. Speaker 6 (7:19) So Kyle does something where now she does it a few times in this episode, but she keeps referencing people that she doesn't like and don't like her as kind of classics, which cracks me up. And the whole episode, they're like, wasn't this the most fun part of Beverly Hills? And almost every clip is Lisa Vanderpump. And Speaker 2 (7:40) I loved Speaker 5 (7:41) it. I loved that for Speaker 2 (7:42) Kyle. Yeah, Kyle starts making fun of Dorit doing her pose against the window. Kyle loves making fun of that. And then... Everything she brings up to reference is like something iconic somebody else did. It's just very Kyle, Speaker 6 (7:57) you Speaker 2 (7:58) know? Yeah. So now the women meet up downstairs. They're ready to go to Kyle's, but Luanne's not there because she's already at Kyle's. And she's actually... She's trying on some angel wings. She's like, okay, boys. put on the angel wings and she's like i kind of feel like it's victoria's secret right now well guess what victoria's secret is that her mother is a cabaret star that's right victoria de la steps i'm talking about Speaker 5 (8:27) Yeah, I wore a boy's shirt today because the harness is gonna go here and the skirt's gonna cover that. All this show business, that's what we do, girls. It's the 20th anniversary, we gotta do something really grand, so it's gonna be big and fabulous. Kyle and I have cooked up a great surprise for the lady. What everybody wants, me singing. Me singing. Speaker 2 (8:49) That's right, for the 20th anniversary, we're gonna do something big and fabulous. Or just me. floating in on a low speed zipline and dancing with a bunch of people dressed like bushes Speaker 2 (9:05) It was so camp. I loved it. Speaker 6 (9:07) Although the zip line, you know, I get it. Like, let's fly Luann in. But they had curtains. And then the zip line was up this ladder. So she climbs up this huge ladder to come down the zip line. But then by the time she gets past the curtain, she's almost already on the ground. You barely see her. I know. You just kind of see her Speaker 2 (9:25) sliding across the ground. And then Speaker 6 (9:28) she Speaker 2 (9:28) was stuck in that harness. for like half the song i'm like is anyone gonna release her from that like no it makes her sing better um Speaker 6 (9:36) that's the only way we can tighten her diaphragm okay it's Speaker 3 (9:41) time for a commercial it's time for a crappin's Speaker 2 (9:44) commercial Speaker 2 (9:48) So then people start to arrive at the white party and get excited, everyone, because if you enjoy entrances, this show has many of them. You want to watch a housewife walk in, but you want to watch another one walk in and then another and then another. You're in luck. Here it is. Yeah. And it starts with big lines. Speaker 6 (10:08) Erica comes in Speaker 2 (10:09) and Speaker 6 (10:09) we we cut to her going or Speaker 4 (10:11) what or what? Speaker 6 (10:14) Then there's name them, Speaker 4 (10:17) name them, name them. Speaker 6 (10:18) And then Teddy comes in. Oh, I'm Teddy. It's a thrill. Speaker 2 (10:25) A lot of Speaker 6 (10:25) people walking in. Speaker 2 (10:26) And. Speaker 2 (10:29) And Sutton's like, well, it better get colder because my jacket's part of my outfit. I like that she's still furious about something. And then Teddy's like, hi, I'm Teddy. Kyle, you look stunning. I'm obsessed with the hair. It's like, oh yeah, this. And this dress I'm wearing, I have it in black for the homeless not toothless event. Remember that? Did I say it right? I always get it wrong. Isn't that funny? Roll the clip of me getting it wrong, everyone. Can you believe it? So we see clips of that. And then everyone starts showing up. And we see Eileen and we see Camille. They give us a very long pernicious clip, which I did appreciate Camille saying like, these Speaker 4 (11:05) women are just like, they're just pernicious. They're just so pernicious. Speaker 3 (11:10) Yeah, it's pernicious. Speaker 2 (11:13) It's pernicious. Of course, if they were really. if they were really kind they would have played the ultimate camille that Speaker 1 (11:21) we're gonna be celebrating somebody Speaker 5 (11:23) else's yeah the same day that we hear about our friends uh split so Speaker 1 (11:28) upsetting i Speaker 6 (11:29) know you Speaker 2 (11:31) know all these years later that is still one of the funniest clips ever if you've never heard us play that clip before the beauty in it is the way that camille starts a sentence but doesn't know what to do with it some research just decides to take the reins and he just crafts his sentence of his own and then she tries to keep up and she can't and then she just winds up on this sort of generic sentiment i'm gonna play it again how sad Speaker 1 (11:53) that we're gonna be celebrating somebody Speaker 5 (11:55) else's yeah on the same day that we hear about our friends uh split so Speaker 1 (12:00) upsetting i know Speaker 6 (12:08) So Camille's asking Eileen how it is to be back. And she's like, interesting. Speaker 3 (12:13) Yeah, well, last time I saw you here, Lisa Rinna was screaming at me. That wasn't a fun night for me then, but this is going to be fun. Speaker 6 (12:22) This one's going to be fun, right, girls? And then we see Crystal come in and Denise. Bravo, bravo, fucking bravo, Kyle. And Kevin Lee's even there. And Lee, what's that? Speaker 2 (12:38) He represents Lisa Vanderpump, I believe. Speaker 6 (12:42) Yeah, Lisa Vanderpump's like, no! They didn't have Lisa Vanderpump. They didn't have Lisa Rinna. They didn't have Garcelle. They were kind of missing a lot. I feel like you need Speaker 2 (12:52) to bring everybody out here. But we had Adrienne. Adrienne was having a great time. She just had this smile on her face. She's like, wow, big year for me with Bravo. First I get to be on Atlanta, now here I am. And she's just sitting there smiling like the FAO Schwartz clock. Left to right, left to right. Wow, yeah, this is great. Great to be back. Where's Jackpot the dog? Right, remember? Flashback. No, you don't want to take my flashback cue. That's okay. Just happy to be here. Me, Adrian Malouf, my husband's an asshole. Okay, Speaker 5 (13:27) Paul, shut up, Paul. Speaker 6 (13:30) Adrian's back. Iconic Adrian Yanks. I remember really nothing about her season, except they showed her washing the chicken, and I remember she hated Paul. Speaker 2 (13:40) So Lisa is talking to Teresa and Vicky, and I think they're on their way, and Lisa's like, ah, is there anyone you don't want to see tonight? Or is like, are you like good with everyone? And Teresa's like, Speaker 4 (13:53) yeah, I don't have any like, um. problem with like no other housewives so like i'm like pretty good yeah you know and Speaker 2 (14:02) uh lisa's upset because some of her cast members will be there Speaker 6 (14:07) Uh-oh. Dun, dun, dun. And she's been doing so well on this show. Everybody likes her. And Giselle talks to Portia, and she's like, what are we feeling about tonight? Are we getting the energy? It's like, well, I Speaker 3 (14:23) remember, you know, she was doing that all-white party, and, you know, she was hugged up on Mauricio. I saw that one. Speaker 6 (14:30) And, um... Giselle's like, oh, yes, I saw it. Do you remember when she made that woman get off her husband? And then we see the clips of Kyle being like, get off of my husband. Get Speaker 4 (14:41) off of him. Speaker 2 (14:43) and they just like laugh at how kyle just like tore that woman off of off of of mauricio so now we see kyle saying hi to adrian and camille and kyle's like oh my god i'm like trying not to touch everybody too much because of the all the way but like 20 years of housewives isn't that like crazy and to know that i've been consistently on the show all this time adrian what's it like to not be on it consistently and just like try to claw your way into these scenes that's fun Adrian's like, yeah, I know. I can't believe it. Remember 15, 15 years ago. Yeah, 15 years ago. Wow. And you know what? They had our photos, season one, like down in Orange County. And I was like, oh my God, I look disgusting. I was just like wearing some hideous one shoulder dress. Like who would even wear something as awful as that? Right, guys? Oh, you mean like the dress that I'm Speaker 3 (15:30) wearing right now, Kyle? Speaker 2 (15:32) Whoops. Oh, like the dress that. Speaker 5 (15:35) Camille's wearing right Speaker 2 (15:36) now. It's like one strap, but it's actually quite stylish. Like, you know, fashion trends go out, but then they come back in, they come back around Speaker 6 (15:43) again. It looks nice. Speaker 3 (15:45) So upsetting. So upsetting. Everyone Speaker 6 (15:50) arrives and we just hear Meredith. Now you're drinking them. Remember Speaker 3 (15:55) she's Speaker 6 (15:56) right. Whenever Camille kisses someone, she can't even make her lips go. So she's like. Speaker 6 (16:05) Just kind of hits their face at the side of her face. And her eyes are like half closed. Speaker 4 (16:13) She's Speaker 6 (16:14) my favorite kisser on all of Housewives. So everybody arrives and we hear Meredith like. Camille's talking to Kevin Lee and we don't hear their whole conversation. We just hear her going, Speaker 3 (16:27) yeah, I changed my body a little. I made a few adjustments. So Speaker 6 (16:31) did he. But I love that that's the conversation in Beverly Hills. Like, what do you have done? What do you have done? Looks great. Yours too. Are you healed yet? Speaker 2 (16:41) So then Lisa's so excited. She's going to a Beverly Hills party. She's like, oh my gosh, we're like arriving at Kyle's. This is like when I hang out with like Ben and Blake. Like, wow, the white party. I've seen it on TV before. It just looks like amazing. I'm like, you live in Salt Lake City. I think you've been to probably Speaker 6 (16:57) many white parties. Speaker 6 (17:00) Yeah, I know. It's like the set of