Let's Marry Harry Finalists & Kelsey Darragh

The Viall Files

In this episode of The Viall Files, Kelsey Darragh returns to discuss her new book 'Don't Do What I Did: Break Up and Bounce Back,' a science-backed workbook exploring

Key takeaways

• Breakups trigger brain responses similar to grief or addiction withdrawal, requiring serious emotional processing.
• Social media exacerbates post-breakup pain by keeping ex-partners constantly visible.

Main topics

• Emotional recovery from breakups
• Impact of social media on post-relationship healing

Notable quotes

He was tangled in a web of his own lies.

Conclusion

The episode offers both personal healing insights through Kelsey Darragh

Transcript preview

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We're doing our best. We have a fantastic episode lined up for you. The ladies, the finalists of Let's Marry Harry. Amber, Sam, and Danelle are with us later this episode to unpack all the drama of Let's Marry Harry. The reunion aired last night. We had them in studio, like, right, like, they basically recorded the reunion, and then they came into our studio. It looked like they went through it, but there was a lot of drama to unpack. I guess there was some, you Speaker 6 (2:15) know, Speaker 1 (2:15) Amber and Danelle got into it at the reunion. They unpacked it on the couch. Sam was sitting in between them. amazingly awkward lots to get into obviously they have a lot to say about harry which is unsurprising uh but it is a fantastic episode i can't wait for everyone to listen to that but before we get to the ladies of let's marry harry we have kelsey darra hey if you've been with us for a long time kelsey uh was a guest maybe six seven years ago we were in acting class together way back in the day we Speaker 5 (2:45) were Are you still acting out there? Yeah, sure. Speaker 4 (2:48) What Speaker 5 (2:48) happened? I Speaker 4 (2:49) mean, I get the occasional Speaker 1 (2:50) audition. I'm booked and busy right now with the podcast and being a dad. How is his craft, Speaker 5 (2:57) Kelsey? Speaker 1 (2:58) You Speaker 5 (2:58) know, he took it very seriously. I remember our acting coach was like, I'm going to put you with him because I feel like you're going to be able to just talk to him straight about it. And I was really prepared for a different kind of human, but he took it very seriously. I was like, okay. Okay. Speaker 1 (3:13) I mean, you know, I'm not here to fuck around, you know, I'm here to book jobs. I'm a thespian. Speaker 5 (3:19) Yeah. He learned his lines. Okay. That was big time. Speaker 1 (3:23) I always had a, what was it? What did they say? Have a beginning thought or something? What am I? What's my thought before? Have your before moment. Yeah. Well, welcome Speaker 6 (3:33) back, Kelsey. Kelsey has Speaker 1 (3:35) a new book. I do. Speaker 6 (3:36) That I Speaker 1 (3:36) think all you will appreciate in the relationship space. Don't do what I did. Break up and bounce back. Speaker 6 (3:41) That Speaker 5 (3:42) is Speaker 6 (3:42) a great Speaker 5 (3:42) title. Speaker 1 (3:42) Yeah. Yeah. What'd you do? Speaker 5 (3:44) What didn't I do, Nick? I've done everything the wrong way. I mean, from the social stalking to showing up unannounced at houses to completely ghosting motherfuckers. Like I've done it all. I've put it in this book. That's also a science backed workbook. So it's fun. You Speaker 3 (4:02) can Speaker 5 (4:02) open any page. It's for the heartbroken. It's for the relationship. It's for anyone that is embarrassed. By, yes, the things that they've done and want to get out of that rut. So check it out. Was Speaker 7 (4:14) that so fun to go back in your memory bank and pull out all of the shit that you did? Speaker 5 (4:19) I honestly had to book so many therapy appointments in between writing and looking back at like my 20s, you know, to just see all the crazy shit I did. I could not believe. You're brave. Truly. Going back into your 20s and documenting it. Yes. Proud of you. But I really I just wanted to figure out like why it fucked me up so bad, like why breakups absolutely obliterated me. And so I really wanted to get down to like the science of it and understand what was happening in the body and the brain. And so that was really fun. That kept me sane. Speaker 7 (4:53) Yeah. Speaker 5 (4:53) Like being able to fix the broken pieces. The broken pieces were were sharp and scary and messy and had a lot of cum all over them. And I had to really kind of put that together. Did Speaker 1 (5:03) you wipe those off? What Speaker 5 (5:04) was Speaker 1 (5:05) that? What was one of the most surprising things you learned? Speaker 5 (5:10) Man, I did not treat breakups as seriously as they need to be treated. Like, I did not understand that your brain treats a breakup the same way it treats a death. Like, it is a literal grieving process. And you get addicted to a person the same way an addict can get addicted to drugs or alcohol. And so when we are cut off from our source, our drug dealer, a.k.a. our ex. We go through withdrawal. And I felt crazy. Like breakups made me crazy. And so putting it in that frame and understanding again, like what the brain is doing, what the body is reacting to. I was like, oh, I have an addiction and I need to treat it as such during a breakup. So that was really revelatory for me. The Speaker 1 (5:51) worst part, you know, not that we're wishing death on our exes at all. But the problem with it, it feels like death, but they're still around. They're still there and they're still posting. And psychologically, it's like, you know, torture, torture. Yeah. Speaker 5 (6:06) Yeah. And we didn't have this problem before social media, too. So like all the stuff that now we have access to, it's very hard. And so I wanted to write this for the people that knew that it was hurting deeper than they were willing to admit. And the people that really wanted to figure out how to fix it and, you know, make. healthy relationships moving forward. Is Speaker 1 (6:26) it out? Is it available to order right now? Pre-order? It Speaker 5 (6:28) is. We are just out and you can get it wherever you buy your books. And Speaker 1 (6:31) can we listen if we are back? Audiobook Speaker 5 (6:35) is coming this fall. Speaker 1 (6:37) Okay. Speaker 5 (6:37) Ooh. Yeah. But this Speaker 1 (6:40) is one of those books that even if you want to listen to, probably good to get the paperback because like you said, it's something you want to page through. There's lessons. Speaker 5 (6:47) Yeah. It's got. exercises, journal entries, games. Like a big thing with my first book was like, I wanted it to be fun and funny. So that worked really well. So for the second book, I wanted to make sure that even when you're crying, screaming, throwing up on the floor or, you know, in a place where you don't want to dive into the pain, I wanted there to still be something fun and funny and light and like a game to participate with that. That could still be something that's healing, but not so traumatic. Speaker 1 (7:15) Well, we will have the link of the book in our show bio. So check out the book. So buy, subscribe, not subscribe. Bye. Speaker 7 (7:23) Bye. You can subscribe. It's with Speaker 1 (7:28) great sadness. Obviously, the world, everyone knows about this, but Dolly Parton passed, which is tragic. Speaker 7 (7:34) Oh, my God. River. This was a new thing in River's life was introducing Dolly Parton. And I've never seen a two year old take to such legend. I mean, it's not surprising. But my sister gifted her this book of Dolly Parton, and it's like her autobiography. It's the cutest thing ever. But she, this is her reading it. Speaker 7 (8:07) So this is her just like reading the book, just like obsessed with Dolly Parton. And then, of course, we Speaker 6 (8:12) were Speaker 7 (8:13) in the car and, you know, Dolly Parton's playing on the radio and they've got a picture of her. And she just says out of nowhere. Speaker 5 (8:22) So she can hear you. Speaker 7 (8:29) It's I will always love you. And she's just like, hi, Dolly Parton. And then I take her to the grocery store Speaker 1 (8:34) and Dolly Parton's picture is still on there. And same thing. Speaker 3 (8:39) Dolly Parton. Dolly Speaker 1 (8:41) Parton. Speaker 3 (8:42) In the car. Speaker 1 (8:50) And I play it. Speaker 7 (8:58) Like what two and a half year old. She has a vocal stim. Truly just loves Dolly Parton. Dolly Parton. Speaker 1 (9:03) We are grateful for Dolly Parton for touching her daughter's heart and she will be a fan forever. But it's just Dolly Parton, one of the absolute legends of America. Incredibly talented. I don't think people appreciate how talented Dolly Parton was. I mean, acting, performing, songwriting. I mean, the... I think she's got thousands. Speaker 7 (9:23) She also did so many things for children. Her father couldn't read, is this right? And she sent out all of these books to all of these children. Her younger siblings, she took in all her younger siblings when she got married to Carl Dean and took care of them. Speaker 1 (9:39) Beautiful soul. Beautiful soul. Also, Tim Curry passed away. You may not know him by his name, but everyone knows him from Home Alone 2 and Clue. A comedy... Genius. So many great characters he played. Speaker 4 (9:53) Pennywise and It. The original Pennywise. Rocky Speaker 1 (9:56) Horror Picture Speaker 5 (9:56) Show. Yeah, wow. The drag queen. Yes. Was Speaker 1 (10:00) he also 80? They were both 80 years old? Oh, wow. Both Speaker 4 (10:04) 80. The Grim Reaper just taking all the whimsy from the world. Honestly, the Speaker 5 (10:07) wrong one. You know what I mean? Like, wrong target. Who are the right Speaker 1 (10:11) ones? Speaker 5 (10:12) Well, you know. Could have been. I have other choices I would choose. Speaker 4 (10:17) Tim Curry and Dolly Parton weren't top of the list, I'll tell you that much. Speaker 5 (10:20) Really Speaker 4 (10:21) sad. Also recently, Hayden Panettiere as well, Speaker 6 (10:24) a Speaker 8 (10:25) younger one, which is tragic. All legends. All legends. Speaker 5 (10:29) All sparkle. Speaker 1 (10:31) Well, all of these people obviously gone too soon and just sending love to all of their families. They will be remembered fondly by all of us. And it's always sad to see legends no longer with us. If you are following the Lindsay Clancy case, we had a fantastic episode. I'm afraid to ask you, Kelsey. Speaker 5 (10:50) I've gone too far. I need someone actually to call somebody because I am on TikTok to the point where you Speaker 1 (10:56) need to listen to our episode yesterday. We had Dr. Curry on a forensic psychologist. She's, I think, world renowned. I don't know. Very impressive guest. And we obviously because there's so much information on TikTok about this case and so much misinformation. We talked with her in great length about obviously just postpartum and how that works. You know, we're going through it right now. You know, what's. what's accurate, what's not accurate, how you can be a supportive partner, et cetera, et cetera. But she also covers in great detail the merits of this case from a professional lens. And if you are down a rabbit hole on TikTok and you're not sure what's true or you're arguing with your friends, give it a listen. I think you might learn a lot. I am, you know, this is just my opinion, but the latest expert on this case, I think she's going, I think she's... Speaker 6 (11:45) I think she's going to lose Speaker 1 (11:46) her case. I thought it was really interesting, the doctor who we talked about with Dr. Curry. Basically, the voices she claims that she's heard, she only heard them for the 18 minutes in which she did this horrible thing. And this world-renowned psychologist was like, that's just very rare. And honestly, based off this, just my humble opinion, could be wrong, I think she made up the voices. Speaker 5 (12:14) There's a lot, too, about postpartum that is misunderstood or not even known. And what's bothered me about this case is they have clowns up there acting like they are talking about postpartum from an expert standpoint. And it's like the basic knowledge. I personally know people who have gone through psychosis of postpartum induced or otherwise. And they. won't remember a lot of things or they think they have done things that they haven't done like I'll be like oh did you do this and they'll be like yeah that was me and I'm like that no it wasn't and and so just the nuance feels like it's missing so deeply and I feel so terrible for her because I can only imagine how scary it is going through her but what I think the light at the end of the tunnel with a case this big is people are curious about postpartum in a way yeah um that we've never really seen before. And postpartum psychosis is such a shameful thing that is so terrifying and scary for a mom to talk about openly that I think if there's a light at the end of the tunnel, it's that there's going to be a little bit more conversation and nuance around that. The Speaker 1 (13:22) only thing, and I think Dr. Curry pointed this out, is that the hope is that that interest in the awareness of postpartum remains after the... fascination with the case goes away. So it'll go away. And then the next crazy story will come out and people will hyper focus on that. And, and the fear is that it's more about the case than the awareness of, uh, postpartum depression and postpartum sarcosis. And to your point, yes, there's very little, there's no real bright spot in this case, but if there is more awareness for the suffering moms, and there are so many and millions out there who deal with this, who, uh, don't do what Lindsay did. And hopefully that awareness remains after the case ends because it's going to end soon. But I don't know. I think she's going to be found guilty and go to jail. Speaker 5 (14:12) Jail? Yeah. Well, I think she's either in jail or a mental. Well, that's Speaker 1 (14:17) without question that she's not getting out. But I mean, that psychologist, that was a damning testimony. Him basically saying in my 20 plus years of experience, this is. I haven't really seen this before, and this doesn't really track with the other, you know, patients I've, you know, treated who have heard these types of voices and things like that. Who knows what the jury is going to come up with. But that's, you know, it kind of it kind of implies that she made up the voices. Did Speaker 5 (14:48) she say that she heard physical? Because in psychosis, there is like a narrator. There is someone talking to you, but it's like your inner voice versus like a schizophrenia where you're hearing an outside, like a man's voice. Well, my understanding Speaker 1 (15:03) of the confusion, and again, I might get this wrong. Listen to the interview with Dr. Curry. But a lot of people are confusing the fact that she went to her husband and said, I have these intrusive thoughts. I have these negative thoughts about doing things to my kids and doing things to myself. That is not the same as. I have I'm hearing voices telling me to do something and people are confusing the two and they're not the same. And her her argument is like, I did it because of these voices, but she only heard these voices. But that is a good question Speaker 7 (15:34) that Kelsey has is like, or is was it other people's voices in her head or was it like Speaker 5 (15:40) it was just some guy? Speaker 1 (15:42) Or Speaker 5 (15:42) like, how willing are you to say, like, I'm having these intrusive thoughts and like. my mind is telling me to do these things. You're not really going to say like, I'm hearing someone else's voice because you're going to be called crazy. Well, that's true. I mean, Speaker 1 (15:53) Dr. Curry talked about that, that sometimes people who hear this, they won't, you know, it's part of the paranoia. They won't say it. But in the evaluation after the act happened, that was her story. And she stuck with that story. Speaker 7 (16:07) She did tell someone right after in one of these evaluations like that her kids were safe now. which does connect with hearing voices. It's a sad situation, Speaker 1 (16:18) obviously. And just sending love to the families affected by this. Yeah, it's really gone off the rails. There's a now writer for Vanity Fair who's claiming to be a childhood friend who got fired from Vanity Fair because she's in court smiling. Speaker 5 (16:33) Oh, that was actually psychopathic behavior. That clip you've seen of the camera panning to her? Oh my Speaker 1 (16:39) God. That's Speaker 5 (16:40) like something out of Smile too. Get that girl to Speaker 1 (16:43) another rate. Speaker 5 (16:43) Did you see her explanation, Speaker 7 (16:44) Kelsey? Speaker 5 (16:45) What was it? Speaker 7 (16:46) Oh, she said that her dad saw her in the news coverage and was like, hey, you look too serious. Like, maybe you should smile more. No, no, no. It Speaker 1 (16:53) wasn't just her dad. It was her dad and Hilary Duff's stylist. I mean, how does Hilary Duff catch a stray? Don't Speaker 4 (17:01) drag her into Speaker 1 (17:01) this. Speaker 4 (17:01) First the mom Speaker 7 (17:02) or Speaker 4 (17:02) the friend group, now this. Can't catch a Speaker 7 (17:04) break. Speaker 6 (17:05) But Speaker 7 (17:06) yeah, told her that she needs Speaker 5 (17:07) to stop looking so serious. Yeah, but that's a comedic version of advice. Like that's gone too far. Like get in an improv troupe. Do something beneficial with your time. But the Speaker 1 (17:19) way the people have lost this plot, there's this, this is this horrible situation and people are using it to their own personal benefit and sensationalizing and receiving attention off of this. It's gross. I mean, we just get off your phones, people. Like, you know. I think it's the social media. No, it's all social media. Speaker 5 (17:36) So look at Casey Anthony, right? She's come back. all these years later. She stands with Lindsay. Yeah. Speaker 1 (17:42) She what? She stands with Lindsay. Speaker 5 (17:43) Of course. Speaker 1 (17:44) Yeah. Speaker 5 (17:45) She's a mom advocate. Like if that would have, if social media would have been around during her trial, I can't even imagine. Oh Speaker 1 (17:50) my Speaker 5 (17:50) God. So Speaker 1 (17:52) true. Speaker 7 (17:52) Well, Speaker 1 (17:53) we haven't talked about the double lives of suburban wives in a bit. You've been watching Kelsey. Isn't it just a beautiful, wonderful show about the Speaker 5 (18:02) perfect reality show. It's amazing. We've been missing. something like this with real people real families they look real they look like americans i i i am obsessed as an understatement do you guys love it Speaker 1 (18:17) natural milf how incredible she's farting and making money i Speaker 7 (18:24) can't Speaker 5 (18:24) did you guys have you looked have you looked i haven't no you haven't That was the first thing I did. I think it's different for you Speaker 1 (18:36) than it is for me, Kelsey. Speaker 5 (18:37) But you're a researcher. This is your profession. We've got people on the team. Yeah, we've Speaker 1 (18:42) got people on the team for that. Speaker 5 (18:43) Where's your interns? I need to talk to them. Did you look? Speaker 1 (18:47) I wish. Speaker 5 (18:48) Guys. I know. Talk to us about it. What did you find? Okay. Where do I even start? It's literally a mine. It's so much space. It's almost like a parlor trick. It almost seems like a circus act. It seems very athletic. You know, there's like a queef fetish that I didn't know was a thing. Whenever it happens for us, it's like mortifying. I didn't know that this was something that you want to actively practice. Speaker 4 (19:17) Yeah. People will pay for it. She's getting on all fours Speaker 1 (19:20) bending over and just letting it rip. And cha-ching. It's just like cha Speaker 5 (19:24) -ching. Certain flexing positions and yoga positions that I'm like, wait a minute. Can I do that? Is that something we all can do? But there's a lot about the anatomy I didn't know that I've learned. Speaker 1 (19:36) And maybe natural milk is cashing in the most, but they do buy a lot of cars. And I'm no financial expert, but I feel like I've been told it's a bad investment. And they're living in the sticks. They have a fleet of automobiles. So much so that their neighbors think they're drug dealers. Speaker 5 (19:56) Some people collect Pokemon cards. Some people invest in the stock market. Speaker 4 (20:01) She did say that she was holding on to the Escalade or whatever. So it's like she's just got some cars that they're just testing out, seeing how they feel, how they drive. Speaker 7 (20:10) Yeah, Speaker 5 (20:10) it's freedom. Speaker 7 (20:11) Have you ever Speaker 5 (20:12) wondered what your neighbors do, Kelsey? Not like that, but now this show has me wondering. Everyone I talk to, I'm like, you Speaker 3 (20:20) know what I mean? When I bought Speaker 1 (20:21) my first house in LA, my neighbor. It parked in the car. Giant pickup truck. And my first thought was, I bought a house in LA and I bought a house next to the only Trump supporter in LA because there was this big pickup truck. Speaker 5 (20:36) Oh, you know, listen, Speaker 1 (20:38) if I'm not here to talk politics and, you know, I, I, I don't dislike people because of who they vote for. But I was just more like, I don't know, this might be too intense for me. You know, it just it was a big pickup truck. And then I met him and he was he's from Jamaica. He grew weed in his background and gave it to me all the time. And he's Ken Handyman. Incredible man. Speaker 5 (20:55) It's just a resourceful vehicle. So Speaker 1 (20:57) don't judge a book by its car. Speaker 5 (20:59) Yeah. Don't judge a milf, a natural milf by their pickups. Have Speaker 1 (21:03) you ever been accused of being a drug dealer? Speaker 5 (21:05) Anyone? Oh, I was once in high school. I sold weed to my teachers, but that was just because I was bored and in Florida. To your teachers. Speaker 4 (21:12) Such Speaker 8 (21:12) a Speaker 4 (21:12) Florida story. Such a Florida story. Speaker 5 (21:16) Yeah. Well, it's everything they say about Florida is true. And you don't realize how crazy that it is until you leave. You're like, oh, you also weren't doing drugs in the bathroom at school. And, you know. throwing an alligator through a gas station window to steal beer when you were 17? You weren't? I was like, no. What Speaker 1 (21:34) do you tell people when they ask you what you do? Speaker 5 (21:37) Oh, I don't. I lie. Speaker 5 (21:41) What do you say? What's your go-to? I lie. I'm an accountant. I'm an accountant. Speaker 1 (21:45) I mean, I used to be. Because no Speaker 5 (21:47) follow-up questions? No follow-up questions. No one cares about what an accountant does. How do I explain? What do Speaker 1 (21:51) I Speaker 5 (21:51) say? I get Speaker 1 (21:52) really awkward and cagey, and then I say I work in entertainment, and they're like, what do you mean? And I'm like, I don't know. Speaker 5 (21:57) Then it gets like porny. Yeah. Oh, that's something I've had to do. I've been crossing the border a lot because my boyfriend's in Canada. And every time they go, what do you do for a living? And I say, I'm a content creator. And then they look like an extra second. And I go, not the OnlyFans kind. Speaker 7 (22:13) But I would. I would. If anyone Speaker 5 (22:15) would. Like, yeah, I Speaker 7 (22:17) would. If anyone Speaker 5 (22:17) would. Speaker 7 (22:18) I mean, it's so funny because, like, I was telling my chiropractor. He asked me what I did. And I was like, oh, me and my husband, they host a podcast. And he was like, oh. Yeah. You know, it's kind of like a little like, ugh. Yeah, you know, another one. Speaker 1 (22:31) You quit your good paying job to chase some dream that's never going to happen. Speaker 7 (22:37) But then it clicked. I should just start telling people that we're hosts of a Netflix dating show. Speaker 1 (22:42) There you go. Oh, Speaker 7 (22:43) hell Speaker 1 (22:44) yeah. Speaker 7 (22:44) Much cooler. Speaker 5 (22:45) Oh, yeah. And then people have exciting follow-up questions. It goes from oh to oh. Speaker 1 (22:50) Yeah. Speaker 7 (22:50) Then you're like, oh, okay, you've made it. Got it. You're legit. It's like, aw. Speaker 1 (22:56) And then they're like, well, what's the name of the show? Well, we match really old people with really young people. In a not creepy way. In a not creepy way. They're like, sure. In a Speaker 5 (23:05) legal way. Legal. In a legal, Speaker 4 (23:07) they signed up for this way. Exactly. Speaker 1 (23:09) Yeah. And then I wish I said I did OnlyFans. Speaker 5 (23:13) No follow-up questions. Yeah. Speaker 1 (23:14) It's better when she says it than when I say it. Speaker 3 (23:16) Oh. Speaker 5 (23:17) Well, she's a natural milf. I am a natural Speaker 7 (23:19) milf. And I am. Speaker 1 (23:22) Looking really hot, by Speaker 7 (23:23) the Speaker 1 (23:23) way, these days. Speaker 7 (23:24) Hell yeah. Speaker 5 (23:25) You're making it look cool and good. And that's bad for my brand as like a childless woman in her 30s. Speaker 7 (23:33) Making it look really chic, coding that baby right here. Well, we have a lot of people at our Speaker 1 (23:38) house helping out, particularly her mom often, who's not here right now. But I got to tell you, I really got to sneak in the ass grabs. Speaker 5 (23:46) It's Speaker 1 (23:46) hard, you know, to try to be. I mean. Speaker 7 (23:49) If you have the time in the hell, you're human. No, last night we're feeding. I'm pumping and he's feeding both babies. And then he's like, so should we? I'm like, this is this feels like a terrible time. This is like the worst possible. It's three in the morning. We're exhausted. He's like, you didn't feel that? Yeah. You're not turned on right now, do you? You're not being shared something there, no? No. I just pumped for 20 minutes and he puts his hand on my boob, but I'm like, I just already got a lot of stimulation. Speaker 6 (24:24) It Speaker 5 (24:24) could be worse. He could be repelled and like, I have no energy or attraction to you. That is true. I think this is actually champagne problems. Speaker 1 (24:35) I'm just letting you know that I'm standing by and ready to go whenever she Speaker 5 (24:38) is. That is true. He could be Speaker 7 (24:40) repelled. He could be like, oh, God, Speaker 1 (24:41) look at all that milk squirting Speaker 7 (24:42) out. Disgusting. Speaker 5 (24:45) That's Speaker 7 (24:45) a Speaker 5 (24:45) kink I found out via our natural milfs. Our researcher here. Yes. I am your new intern. And turns out being a mommy is a whole place. It's a whole Speaker 1 (24:56) place. There's a space for that. That's too much. Speaker 4 (24:59) Natural MILF was feeding the camera where I was like, I wonder what that fetish is like on the other end. Yeah, what are they doing? Can I pose a Speaker 5 (25:06) question to the group? Have any of you ever tried that type of porn where it's like someone talking to you and it's audio only? Speaker 4 (25:18) No. Oh. I didn't even know this existed. Like ASMR. Speaker 5 (25:21) Like Speaker 4 (25:22) ASMR. Audio book? Whoa. Speaker 5 (25:24) It's not a fetish. It's just imagine listening to porn with your eyes closed. Like an audio book. It's an audio book. I strongly recommend it. Speaker 1 (25:33) Yeah. Speaker 5 (25:34) If you want to switch up the routine. Do Speaker 1 (25:37) you have a favorite double life content creator? Speaker 5 (25:41) I think it's a healthy thing to participate in a good. It's not hurting anyone. It's a healthy outlet, you know. Helps with anxiety when you just got to rub one out real fast. And if I can find something very specific that hurts nobody. And yeah, you don't. It's too much. There's too much choice now. Right. So when you find a good niche, you got a niche down. You got to stick to what you know. And that's Speaker 7 (26:04) what our double lives of suburban wives moms are doing. They're giving you the niches. Yeah. And I think Speaker 5 (26:09) it's beautiful that she's putting like kink life out there for everyone to see, like for her to own. Though that kink life so strongly, I think is really cool. Speaker 4 (26:19) I've saw things I have never seen before. Like Speaker 5 (26:21) the giant content. Speaker 4 (26:23) Oh, that was. Yeah. What little man wants to be put in someone's pocket Speaker 5 (26:26) sexually? I just got to meet that guy. Do you Speaker 1 (26:29) feel like the guys into the giant porn are short kings who are embracing their shortness? Or do you think it's tall men who want to know what it feels like to be a short king? Speaker 4 (26:39) I want I want it to be the second answer. I want it to be a tall fetish. That they're like, well, I'll never know what it feels like to look up at someone. Speaker 5 (26:48) It's kind of Speaker 4 (26:49) cutesy. I do Speaker 5 (26:49) think Speaker 4 (26:50) that's adorable. Well, Speaker 5 (26:51) I Speaker 1 (26:51) will say as a man who is six, too, there's not many people I have to physically literally look up to. And it is an intimidating, weird thing when you're, you know. But Speaker 5 (27:00) what if you also got a boner when you did that? Like. Speaker 5 (27:05) That's the people I want to talk to. Speaker 7 (27:08) Anything Speaker 1 (27:08) else before we get to our Let's Marry? Did you watch Let's Marry, Harry? Speaker 5 (27:14) Obsessed. Obsessed and following all the TikToks. Speaker 1 (27:18) Were you familiar with Mr. Harry Jowsey before the show? Speaker 5 (27:22) Yeah, of course. It's the guy I love to hate and hate to love, right? I'm right down the middle with him. Speaker 1 (27:28) What did you just think about the earnestness of the women on the show? Because it was more like, have you not seen his content? Speaker 5 (27:37) Yeah, I think it's fantastic. The producers did a great job of making sure all of these girls have TikToks and Instagrams afterwards because it's such a good supplement to the show that I think they're setting sort of like this new precedent about because Love Island kind of did it. But this being so now and happening with the reunion and everything, like I think it's a great marketing tactic. But I love how. honest and free and real all of the girls are. Yeah, Speaker 1 (28:04) no, they're very. Apparently, you guys Speaker 5 (28:05) know what happened and you're going to be giving me. Well, the Speaker 1 (28:09) women we have coming up next, Amber, Danelle and Sam, the three finalists at the reunion that many people have now listened to this episode probably have seen. And I guess Amber came in guns a blazing, the one who got married, quote unquote, and is no longer with Harry. There's a lot to unpack post post filming of the show. Speaker 7 (28:30) He's currently dating someone he met on their honeymoon. Speaker 1 (28:33) Allegedly. Allegedly. Yeah. Speaker 4 (28:35) What? Which is very Jerry Seinfeld. Speaker 1 (28:37) Is that not the Speaker 4 (28:37) most fitting thing for Harry Jousey? Well, he can't have another show if he changed and got married. Speaker 5 (28:45) But also Speaker 1 (28:45) somewhere in between that, he broke up with Amber and then reached out to Danelle. And then they hooked up and then Amber found out about this. But Speaker 7 (28:53) Amber didn't know that they were broken up. Amber didn't Speaker 1 (28:55) know this and they address it on the couch. And when they got in, when they came into the studio, Sam and Danelle came in first and we had them sitting like, we're actually literally where you two are sitting right now. And we put three of them on the couch. And before Amber, before Amber came in, then I was like, slide over Sam. And so you have Sam sitting in between Danelle and, and Amber and it's. I can't wait for you guys to listen. Stay tuned. Oh my Speaker 5 (29:20) God. Good stuff. Harry. We need a man to blame. Speaker 1 (29:28) Well, I'm going to give a, we opened up the interview. I'll give this away before we do the interview, but I wanted to know their familiarity with Harry Jowsey while filming the show. And they claim, who have not known much, they wanted to meet him for himself. You're joking. That's their story. Speaker 5 (29:43) But haven't I feel like Harry said that in the contract, it clearly said, let's marry Harry. But like what girls are reading all of that fine print when they signed up for the show? Speaker 1 (29:53) It's not the fine print, but it's just like, don't you look up the guy you might marry and someone who is very accessible via. Yeah, there's no way they didn't Speaker 5 (30:02) know. I'm calling them all liars. I've never Speaker 4 (30:05) seen too hot to handle. I know far more about Harry Jowsey than I would like to know. And it's all been against my will. So there's no way that you don't know. I do not follow that man. Yeah. Only show that I've ever seen him on was The Perfect Match with Jess. Other than that, I know nothing else about this man besides I know so much about this man. And I'm just like, wait, why? Because it just gets bombarded onto me. So I'm just like, there's no way you sign up for a show like this to marry someone and be like, nope. And he's such a public figure. And he puts himself in the headlines that I'm just like, how could you not know? If you just Google Harry Jousey one time, the amount of stuff that pops up. Speaker 5 (30:43) And I think he was really he was really playing into the I'm a reformed fuck boy. Like he really had us all thinking we're watching a change man. And that's all we want as women is we want to see the guy prove that it can happen. And then that way we can project that out into all the fuck boys. We've Speaker 1 (31:02) for sure. Speaker 5 (31:03) But you waste your time. You Speaker 4 (31:04) must Speaker 1 (31:04) go into this thinking it might not happen, though. Right. Like there's. Maybe. Maybe he's changed. But Speaker 4 (31:10) I also... He really acted like he changed. But as I said, I kind of appreciate the rollout of this all where it was like the breakup with Jess and I'm going to be a changed man, the boyfriend material, the whole thing. Like, I'm really, really working on it for him to do this show where we obviously knew he wasn't actually going to get married. But then it was like, oh, and on my honeymoon, I met my girlfriend. But then I called one of the other contestants. It's like, oh, we're just back at square one. Speaker 5 (31:31) And he was giving us like live therapy during all of his confessionals and interviews with producers. Like, he really had me thinking like, oh, no, I can. the work. I'm watching it live in his brain like his little I'm watching his little mechanisms turn. Speaker 4 (31:45) I'm like what's worse a fuck boy or a self-proclaimed fixed fuck boy. The second. Right. Much more dangerous. Definitely. You Speaker 1 (31:53) cast a house full of beautiful women. You have them live in the house with these women. Him living Speaker 5 (31:59) in there is nuts. Speaker 1 (32:00) And he's hooking up left and right. Are Speaker 5 (32:03) they all have mono like the whole time. Was this like a Love Island situation. I got sick the whole time. You have to. Speaker 7 (32:10) Pink eye, mono, everyone's sick. Yeah. Not Speaker 4 (32:13) pink eye. Speaker 7 (32:14) Definitely pink Speaker 1 (32:14) eye. Speaker 7 (32:15) Definitely. Speaker 5 (32:15) You're touching bits and pieces and Speaker 7 (32:17) like they're on pillows. There's lots happening on beds. Well, Speaker 1 (32:21) I think it's time to get to these ladies. It's Speaker 5 (32:23) an Speaker 1 (32:23) interview. You definitely are going to enjoy Kelsey. I want to thank you for coming by and just having some fun with us. Don't forget to buy Kelsey's new book. The link is in our bio. It is called Don't Do What I Did. Break up and bounce back. Kelsey, thanks so much for coming. Always great to have you come back. Don't make it another seven years before you come back. You guys are so hot. Have some fun with us. It's good to see you. Where can people follow you? Follow all that fun stuff. Subscribe. Do it. You know, just only fans. Speaker 5 (32:50) What do you. Yeah, I'm going to start one today at Kelsey Dara on all the things. And yeah, go check out. Don't do what I did. All Speaker 1 (32:57) right. Well, up next, we have Amber Donnell and Sam, the three finalists of Let's Marry Harry, unpacking all of their trauma, both on the show and at the reunion. And it is something I hope you all enjoy. They're up next. Well, don't forget, Vofos Plus is ad-free and available to you all. And if you are looking