Cindy Crawford's Parenting Choices, Meghan Markle's Latest Branding Fail, & Tom Kenniff's Debut Novel

The Nerve with Maureen Callahan

Maureen Callahan dissects the fallout surrounding Presley Gerber's tragic death, heavily criticizing Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber for their calculated reputation management while contrasting

Key takeaways

• Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber are accused of orchestrating a PR campaign via People Magazine to control the narrative around Presley's death rather than expressing genuine grief or holding their sober coach accountable.
• George Clooney publicly stated he will never expose his twins to Hollywood fame, a move Callahan interprets as a direct criticism of how the Gerbers raised their children in the industry spotlight.

Main topics

• Presley Gerber tragedy and Gerber family reputation management
• George Clooney's parenting philosophy vs. Hollywood lifestyle

Notable quotes

"Fame brought extraordinary privilege, but it also brought danger."

Conclusion

The episode serves as a sharp cultural critique of celebrity crisis management,

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:00) you Speaker 3 (0:02) Hello and welcome to your Friday edition of The Nerve. I am your host Maureen Callahan and we have some wood shedding to do today. We will begin with new developments in the Presley Gerber tragedy. Trust me when I tell you that Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber are busy trying to make sure that their reputations survive this intact. Speaker 3 (0:33) The nerve isn't having it. It's not. Then we're going to look into, you know, Meghan Markle has a new holiday offering over on her as ever website. And we're going to have a lot of fun with that. She put this thing up. Of course she did up on her social media and blared it out. Like everybody picked it up. Oh, Meghan Markle has a new holiday product available at as ever. And it was supposed to be on sale at like 5 p.m. Eastern yesterday. And it took hours and hours Speaker 4 (1:10) and hours later for her to get it up there. Speaker 3 (1:13) which again, it's just like the metaphor of all metaphors. We have other celebrities in the marketplace who have been selling us stuff that, you know, this is very Dr. Jen adjacent saying, oh, would you like to look like me? Buy my beauty products. A major, major celebrity has just announced her concern is shuttering. And we're going to talk about it. And then we're going to bookend it with some more celebrity model spawn. You would think these people would learn. You would think. But everybody thinks they're special. Everybody thinks it's not going to happen to their kid. Okay. Then we've got troublemaker feedback, troublemaker artwork, and a friend of the nerve who hasn't been on in a while is back. You guys love your book talk. I love book talk. He's got a debut novel and he is back in. the news. So we have an incredibly rich show for you today. And so we ask, are you ready? Are you ready? Let's go. Speaker 3 (2:26) Fall is officially here, at least in some parts of the world. 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That's 25 % off when you use code Maureen at cowboy colostrum.com slash Maureen. Speaker 3 (3:46) I've said it before in our very brief life, and I will say it again. The nerve is moving the culture. In Touch Weekly, their headline, Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber raised kids Kaya and Presley in a, quote, adult world. In Touch, that should be an adult world. Full of, quote, dark stuff. Not what you typically would see from these very celebrity-friendly outlets. Published September 28th by Jennifer Lenhart. And listen, I'm going to read it because it's remarkable in that it's as if they're all listening to the nerve over at InTouch and summarized our thesis, the evidence that we have presented in our cultural criminal court. and talk to some insiders who are like, yeah, that's all right. You are correct. Dead on, bull's fucking eye. Quote, they looked like the genetically blessed American dream, but behind those gates, there was some really dark stuff. End quote. That's a longtime family friend of Cindy Crawford, age 60, Randy Gerber, age 64, telling InTouch, open quote, Fame brought extraordinary privilege, but it also brought danger. My aside, brings danger, brings present tense. The insider continues, young people. It's a very generic way of saying Randy and Cindy's children. Young people, my opinion, were constantly being pulled into a very adult world. It goes on to cite the part of the Studio 22 podcast that The Nerve has played. A former modeling agent telling InTouch they're doing some reporting over there. Good for you guys. Quote, fashion eats childhood incredibly quickly. At 16, everyone treats you like a man because you look like one in photographs. Speaker 3 (6:02) You're traveling with adults, taking your shirt off for photographers, adults, and learning how to perform for strangers emotionally. You're still a kid. Close quote. A veteran makeup artist remembers seeing that disconnect repeatedly. Open quote. I've watched children. Children. Speaker 3 (6:28) Sit in makeup chairs while adults discuss drugs, bodies, diets, and money around them. Trust me, they're talking about sex too. Trust me. Speaker 3 (6:41) Open quote, eventually everyone forgets there's a kid underneath all that makeup. That's when it gets dangerous. My side, I don't think they ever forget there's a kid underneath all that makeup. I think that's the thing that titillates them all. Most of them. My opinion, just my opinion. And it remains my opinion that nobody was in a better place to know that stuff than Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber. And when we get further down in this discussion. Wait till you see and hear. What Cindy and Randy's BFF George Clooney has had to say, he's singing a different song now. I don't think this friendship is going to survive this tragedy. I do not. Speaker 3 (7:25) Continuing on from the InTouch piece, the Gerber home, finally, the mainstream media is beginning to pick this up. Again, I ask, Entertainment Tonight, would you like some eyeballs, some virality, some cultural relevance? Why don't you dig into this shit? The Gerber home, InTouch writes, also attracted some of the world's biggest stars, including Harry Styles. Again, picking up on the NERV's report. The NERV was the first to raise this question in the immediate aftermath of Presley Gerber's death to ask what the actual fuck has been going on in the Crawford Gerber home. Harry was 19. Speaker 3 (8:09) I'm reading from the report when he entered the family's orbit in 2013. And while many assumed Harry was friendly with teenage Presley and Kaya, insiders say the lasting relationship was actually with their father, who was 51 at the time. Harry's 19, Randy's 51. Who do you think, again, Rob and I talked about this on The Nerve at night just a couple of days ago. Who do you think, between the two of them, the 19-year-old Harry Styles, a boy bander from England, and Randy Gerber? A man of the world, a nightlife impresario turned tequila magnate. Who do you think made that first overture? Speaker 3 (8:57) Continuing from the InTouch report. The pair, meaning Harry and Randy, were subsequently photographed together over the years, including at lunch in Malibu, per photos obtained by the celebrity gossip site Just Jared, and dinner in New York City in 2020, per Page Six. And by the way, these are just the ones we know about. Speaker 3 (9:20) Continuing on, sources stress there is absolutely no suggestion that their friendship was anything other than platonic. My aside, when a media outlet puts such obvious legalese in their piece, like I'm going to guess just based on my years of doing this, that in touch, the lawyer said to them, you got to make this very, very, very clear. And there's a way to do it where you like overdo it, where the outlet overdoes it so that that leaps out. And you look at that and you go, yeah, wait, wait, wait, wait. Speaker 3 (10:02) A 51-year-old married father of two young children is running around in a one-on-one Speaker 3 (10:13) relationship with a 19 year old boy bander. Speaker 3 (10:24) Harry wasn't really the kid's friend. He was Randy's friend, says an insider. That was what people found unusual. Here was one of the most famous teenagers on earth becoming incredibly close with a married businessman in his 50s. Nobody was alleging anything inappropriate. People simply wondered what connected them so strongly. Close quote. Indeed. Speaker 3 (10:54) Now we will go take a look over at People Magazine's coverage and People is doing their due diligence. They're doing their humiliating job as celebrity court stenographers. Again, People Magazine, if you would like virality, influence, people talking about you, eyeballs, newsstand sales, subscriptions. Speaker 3 (11:18) You you're digging in. You're you're doing it wrong. You're doing it wrong. People magazine's headline. Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber, quote, tried everything possible, close quote, to help son Presley as his addiction spiraled, colon, exclusive sources. Speaker 3 (11:39) Updated September 24th by Michelle Lee. Now. Speaker 3 (11:44) Again, my very well-educated guests. Speaker 3 (11:50) is that these sources are Randy and Cindy. And it may not be them directly on the phone with People Magazine, but it's their publicist. It's a mouthpiece. It's someone whose job is crisis management and reputation preservation. Speaker 3 (12:09) And I am sure that I am right. Again, this is just my supposition, but I would bet you anything I am right. Speaker 3 (12:19) And this tells us everything because while Randy and Cindy are saying the family asks for privacy at this very, very difficult time. This is what they're concerned with. their images. Speaker 3 (12:33) their careers Remember when Rob was on Wednesday night, we were talking about how it was that Backgrid was getting such clear, unobstructed photographs of Cindy and Randy in the hours and days after Presley died. How is it they got? such a tip about what time George and Amal Clooney would be showing up at their house to pay their condolences. Speaker 3 (13:03) It's because these people. call the paparazzi and tell them when and where to be. Speaker 3 (13:11) Rob said it. He said it. And it was a brilliant observation that Cindy Crawford and Randy Gerber are basically the American Beckhams. They are as much a business unit, if not more so than a family. That is just an outside observation. Speaker 3 (13:33) I mean, what other conclusion can you draw? Speaker 3 (13:38) They just cremated him. They're out talking to People magazine. And guess who's going to get blamed for this? Speaker 3 (13:49) A source tells people that before the 27-year-old suffered a suspected overdose and went into cardiac arrest on Sunday, September 20th, his parents spent, quote, years helping him seek treatment, including therapy, inpatient and outpatient rehab, and, quote, so many types of homeopathic therapies. Close quote. Who else would know this shit? Who else? Do you think anybody in the Crawford Gerber world is going to speak to an outlet like people without their direct dissent, without them saying, absolutely speak to them. Here are the parameters of what we're happy you can talk about and what you can't talk about. Speaker 3 (14:31) I don't know about you guys, but like, if that's my kid who just died of a fucking drug overdose, who spent years, years in a fucking cesspool of an industry that I knew all too well. And I'm just going to guess Cindy knew it all too well. You know, I mean, I think the last thing I would be doing is making sure people magazine could Blair out, um, how much help, uh, we tried to give our loser son. who just couldn't get better. Speaker 3 (15:03) The source of his misery is a complete and utter mystery. Speaker 3 (15:09) We tried. We tried. Speaker 3 (15:14) The source also says that the supermodel and businessman who also shared daughter, Kaya Gerber, 25, had hired, this is an open quote, hired more than one sober coach, close quote, who were with Presley, open quote, almost always, close quote, almost always is not always. Speaker 3 (15:37) And we're going to hear about the dire straits Presley was in the weekend he died. The dire straits and how I think I find that phrase almost always extremely deliberate and calculated. Speaker 3 (15:55) Because Presley Sobercoach, who delivered him to that facility over the weekend, dumped him there. He was high. Presley was high. He was actively using. In fact, he was using because he knew he was getting sent to rehab on Monday. This is very common in the recovery world where people, where addicts, like before they go into rehab, they like have one last fucking hurrah. So that was the most dangerous time for Presley, the most. And the sober coach fucking dumped him there. Where were the parents? Were they not like on top of the sober coach? Like you're still with him. You're still with him, right? We're paying you overtime. We're paying you extra to stay there with him and make sure he is sober. Speaker 3 (16:47) They added, they add that the pair, meaning Cindy and Randy, sorry, this is flying here. Cindy and Randy would quote, guide Presley into quote, working as a model photographer, anything he was excited about, they would support him. Close quote. We've heard Presley speak about how overwhelmed. and depressed he became while working in the modeling industry. Speaker 3 (17:14) And this was a kid who seemed to know himself. Speaker 3 (17:19) I find it incredibly difficult to believe that he was begging his parents to let him begin modeling at the tender age of 14 on September 29th on TMZ. Harvey Levin broke news about this very thing I just mentioned about Presley's sober coach dropping him at the sober house like an Amazon package. Here you go. I'm out. Speaker 1 (17:48) Here we go. What we are told is that the plan appeared to be that the sober coach was going to take Presley to some rehab facility, presumably that following Monday. But he needed a place to put Presley and figured a sober house was the safest place. So the facility accepted him. And the sober coach put him in there, and what we're told is the sober coach left. And Presley was there, as far as we can see, alone. And Presley, from what we're being told, he was doing drugs inside that sober house because what we're told, and I can't be more specific than this, but we do have information, is that Presley knew he was going to be going to rehab. that following Monday, and this would be his last chance to do drugs and get high before he had to get clean. And he did drugs inside the sober house, we're told, and then again found dead just hours later. So. Why did this facility allow Presley inside? From everybody we have spoken with that absolutely should not have been done Why did the sober coach put him in there and then leave? great fucking question Speaker 3 (19:25) You know. If I'm Cindy and Randy and I have the wherewithal to begin gaming out. How I'm going to. Speaker 3 (19:37) try to save my skin reputationally. I don't think my messaging is going to be, listen, we did everything we could. And it's not like we didn't push him into modeling. We just supported him, whatever he wanted to do. My messaging would be that we are furious with the person, the sober coach, whose job was to stay by our son's side minute by minute until He was safely deposited into rehab. We are furious that our son somehow was openly using drugs, ostensibly, reportedly, allegedly, inside a sober house. We're going to file criminal charges. We're going to look into this. People are going to pay. Our son's death isn't going to be in vain. We're going to make sure this doesn't happen to somebody else's child. Speaker 3 (20:33) I think they give a shit. I really don't. I really don't. I realize what this sounds like, but I'm sorry. The nerve, it's like, again, leave this lane wide open for us. This is not an unthinkable tragedy. This is all too fucking thinkable. These people, again, when we're done with this segment, you're not going to ever look at these two the same way again, ever. Cindy Crawford did an interview with Vogue. It was like one of those 73 questions interview. And I, you know what, it's interesting because when we do these pieces and we start putting together like the newest reporting and we want to go back and look at like older archival footage that can help really illuminate what was going on behind closed doors or like the subtext, what's really underneath the sediment. this was in the YouTube algorithm for me to look at, like the Vogue interview. But I thought to myself, oh, it's Vogue 73 questions. Like there's not going to be anything illuminating in there. And then I was watching Megan's show, Megan Kelly, and she had obviously looked at this and found that it actually was an illuminating piece of footage. And so all credit to Megan Kelly and her show. And we're going to show a little bit of it here because this is going to work very nicely into what we are presenting as our evidence to the culture at large. I am the prosecutor, the title of this Vogue piece, which by the way, just before we even get into it, the house is spotless. It's spotless. You don't see a straight piece of mail. You don't see a post-it anywhere. Okay. You don't see an open magazine. I don't think this is a house of readers. Do you know what I'm saying? Randy and Cindy. I don't think that that's their major pastime, but, um, it's all, all staged. It's all staged. And all of these questions have been given to Cindy in advance. And she has come up with her, um, her canned lines and, um, Speaker 3 (22:42) You know, she's such a terrible actress. She tried to become an actress back in the 90s when she was like a major supermodel. She did a terrible movie. I think she co-starred with Billy Baldwin. It was a movie. It was one of those like Joel Silver movies where things just blow up. And she was so terrible. She is just an awful actress. I never understood how she had such a long tenure as the host of MTV's House of Style because her voice was always sing-songy. And no matter what she was saying, she ended up like that. It didn't really matter. She could be talking about a designer who died of AIDS. Speaker 3 (23:22) The title, Cindy Crawford sings George Michael and tours her Malibu home. Here she is showing off her children's artwork. Now this struck me because this is very personal stuff and the kids putting, thinking like journalistically, legally, the kids own the copyright. Okay. Speaker 3 (23:43) But she's showing her children's artwork so that we see what a great mom she is, what a great, proud mom she is. Here they are. Speaker 6 (23:49) This is a little self-portrait by Kaya. And this is Presley's surf photography, shaka. Speaker 7 (23:56) What was your most memorable runway show? Speaker 6 (23:58) Versace, a 91, when all of us came down the runway, lip-syncing to George Michael, Freedom. Speaker 7 (24:05) And what song do you know all the words to? Speaker 6 (24:08) Well, Freedom 90. Speaker 3 (24:15) What struck me about that is like, she's like, here's Kaya's self-portrait and here's Presley's surf photo. Shaka. Like she has this demeanor that like, she doesn't take his love of surfing very seriously. And what I also love is like, she's roaming around the kitchen, putting together like a little beverage and some snacks on like, like a charcuterie board or something as if this person eats. Okay. Sorry. Now. She's going to, oh, and what song do you know, like the lyrics to, all the lyrics to? And she's like, well, Freedom 90. Like, you know, the video, the legendary video I was in. Like, I don't think this is also a very culturally interested person. I don't. Now, note her answer to this question about. Speaker 3 (25:06) Prince, the reports that Prince wrote a song about, I think it was called Cindy C. That was the song, I think. He wrote a song about her and what her favorite lyric is before her daughter just casually happens to wander into the frame and open up the refrigerator and get something out because Kaya also may be a budding supermodel who's way too thin, but she definitely eats whenever she wants. whatever she wants. She doesn't need Cindy's permission. Here we go. Is it true that Prince wrote a song about Speaker 7 (25:39) you? Speaker 6 (25:40) Yes. What Speaker 7 (25:41) was that like? Speaker 6 (25:42) It was surprising. What Speaker 7 (25:43) were the best lyrics? Speaker 6 (25:45) When he said he'd pay the usual fee. Speaker 7 (25:48) Who's one model everyone should be following right now? Speaker 6 (25:50) Kaia Gerber. Speaker 7 (25:51) What's your advice to young models? Speaker 6 (25:54) Be on time and stay off your phone. Speaker 7 (25:57) You recently discovered you're descended from royalty. Speaker 6 (26:01) Yes? Speaker 7 (26:02) No, that wasn't a question. I just think it's cool. Speaker 6 (26:04) Hey, Mom. Hey, Kay. Speaker 7 (26:05) So, Cindy, do you have any nicknames for your kids? Speaker 6 (26:08) She calls me Kiki and my brother P. Speaker 7 (26:11) Do your kids have any nicknames for you? Speaker 6 (26:13) Not that we can say in front of her. Speaker 7 (26:15) What's your favorite thing about your kids? Speaker 6 (26:17) That we're amazing. Uh, Kaya, whose interview is this anyway? Sorry. Ask her about her sense of humor. Speaker 7 (26:23) So, Cindy, what's up with your sense of humor? Speaker 6 (26:26) Um, well, I mean, everyone in my family, they think I have a very inappropriate sense of humor at times. Speaker 3 (26:38) Okay. Again. Speaker 3 (26:44) There are plenty of very wealthy, famous people whose children you never see. Speaker 3 (26:52) her daughter coming in there in this very stage staged scripted exchange where they're both like they're both doing these very flat high-pitched line reading you know line readings Oh, my children think I have it. My family thinks that I have an inappropriate sense of humor at times. We're going to watch and listen to a little bit of Cindy Crawford's inappropriate humor at times. Here she is on Conan on TBS, December 9th, 2015. The title of this clip on YouTube, Cindy Crawford nearly ended up in bed with George Clooney that she thinks what she's about to. this anecdote. First of all, she doesn't know how to tell a story. She really can't. And what happens before these people ever wind up on a talk show stage talking to the host, they go through this stuff with a producer. They do a pre-interview. And the idea is to help have them tell concise, punchy, funny stories before they promote whatever they're promoting. and have a beginning, a middle, and end, a punchline. But Cindy Crawford really can't tell a story. Okay. So this is interesting to watch for that alone. But again, she thinks that this is a funny, charming story. Speaker 3 (28:19) Here we go. Speaker 2 (28:21) George Clooney is very good friends with your husband, Randy, and I understand that those two enjoy going out on the town together sometimes, having a few drinks. Is that fair to say? Speaker 6 (28:32) They have been known to go out and have a few tequilas, yes. Speaker 2 (28:36) And it's got a little out of hand at some point, I understand? Speaker 6 (28:39) Yes, George is very well behaved now that he's married to the lovely Amal. Speaker 2 (28:43) Sounds like a press release. Okay, go ahead. But there Speaker 6 (28:46) was a time before he met Amal that he and Randy had gone out. And they did ask me if I wanted to come, but it was a Sunday night and I stayed home with the kids. And sometimes if Randy goes out late, he'll go into the guest room because the kids will end up falling. to sleep with me in my room. And so I got up because I wanted to make sure he was home safe. And I went in the guest room and I see Randy like face down on the bed. Speaker 7 (29:13) And Speaker 6 (29:13) I'm like, oh my, and he still has his motorcycle boots on. And I'm like, really? Like, so I go over, I get on the bed and I'm like, hey babe. Speaker 1 (29:23) And Speaker 6 (29:23) he Speaker 1 (29:23) looks and it wasn't Randy. It Speaker 6 (29:25) was Speaker 1 (29:26) George. Speaker 6 (29:27) And I don't know who was more shocked, me or George, because, you know, I've woken George up out of a dead, slightly inebriated slumber. And so he's like, oh, my God. And I was like, oh, my God. Speaker 3 (29:39) Okay. Speaker 3 (29:42) A lot about this story is disturbing. Okay. So Randy and George, um, Speaker 3 (29:52) She says that George stopped this once he married Amal Clooney. I don't think so. I don't. So Randy and George would go out and get shit-faced. Speaker 3 (30:04) And, um, This was a usual occurrence. You know, again, Randy is a married middle-aged father of two children. We're going to get to uncle George, but they would get so shit faced, like so blackout fucking drunk. My interpretation based on what Cindy's relaying here, it's a cute story that she, and I don't, I also don't believe that the children would be sleeping in her bed. Speaker 3 (30:35) whenever Randy goes out to get shit-faced. Like, that doesn't make any sense. Okay? So, at the time of this appearance on Conan, Speaker 3 (30:45) Presley would have been 16. He was born on July 2nd, 1999. Kaya would have been 14. She was born on September 3rd, 2001. Okay. So this is the cute story. Daddy and uncle George go out all the time and they get shit faced. Dad would rather be out partying with his middle-aged movie star friend than home with us. Speaker 3 (31:09) Also, those two think it's totally fucking appropriate because she's not telling the story like this. This was a one and done. You know, I said to him after that, we're cutting this off. This is not happening again. I don't I don't like this around the kids. This is not good. This is not good to be modeling for our very young children. Your friend, Uncle George, passed out face down in the guest bedroom. Then she says, I awoke George from a slightly