#2555 - Ron White

The Joe Rogan Experience

Comedian Ron White discusses his stand-up career, touring life, and the evolving comedy scene with Joe Rogan. He shares insights on crowd wo

Key takeaways

• Crowd work is a high-pressure improvisational skill that requires timing, presence, and emotional intelligence.
• Breakout moments for comedians often come after years of grinding and self-reflection, not just luck.

Main topics

• Stand-up comedy performance
• Crowd work dynamics

Notable quotes

"I just had to get my shit together, man. I didn't figure out what the fuck I'm doing." – Brent Reid

Conclusion

Ron White reflects on the journey of comedy as both an art and a craft

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:01) Joe Rogan podcast, check it out. Speaker 5 (0:03) The Joe Rogan Experience. Train Speaker 3 (0:06) by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. Speaker 7 (0:12) I like him, though. I mean, he's a nice kid. I talked to him a little on the green room, and then I thought he had a pretty good set. He's funny. Speaker 6 (0:20) Matt's funny. Matt Rife is very funny. What the fuck's going on? Speaker 7 (0:23) I don't get fucking crowd work. It's not my thing, but I get it. It's a tough skill. Some people are really good at it. I guess they are, but I won't let my opening act do it. Oh, it becomes a problem. Because then they feel like they can talk to me, which they cannot. Yes. Because I just... I always looked at it as a time killer back when I had 41 minutes, but I was supposed to do 45 minutes. And I'm like, I got to talk to these fucking hayseeds for four minutes and get this thing wrapped up. But once I had the jokes, you know, I just do the fucking jokes. Yeah. I mean, I don't knock Speaker 6 (0:57) it. It's cool. It's a different thing. It's a different thing. It's it's relies on a very strong improvisational muscle because like you're under the gun to come up with something funny to say. But it is always funnier. because it's under the gun than it would be in a normal circumstance, like the things that you're saying. Speaker 7 (1:15) But you can never use Speaker 6 (1:16) it Speaker 7 (1:16) again. I mean, you can use the skill all the time. I mean, I guess some people are that good at it. Speaker 6 (1:21) Ingram's really good at it. Rick Ingram, he's got a lot of, like, built-in stuff, like material he could pull out to because he does it so often. Oh, yeah. So he's Speaker 7 (1:29) got Speaker 6 (1:29) to Speaker 7 (1:29) blend the two together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He Speaker 6 (1:31) seamlessly integrates the two of them together. He's really good at it. Big Jay, Big Jay Oakerson, he's really good at it. He's really good at it because he knows how to hold a moment. He knows how to hold, like, when someone says something ridiculous, he knows how to pause. He knows how to, like, he's got great storytelling. Yeah, Speaker 7 (1:49) he's a nice guy, too. He's Speaker 6 (1:50) a great guy, but he also is a great comic. Like, he just does funny stand-up comedy on top of that. So it's like... Yeah, the crowd work is nice, but it's not the only thing he does. Whereas some people, that's their whole thing. Well, Speaker 7 (2:02) I Speaker 6 (2:02) hear these Speaker 7 (2:02) young comics at the club, I gotta work on my crowd work, I gotta work on my crowd work. And I'm like, well, you don't, but... Speaker 6 (2:07) Is your Pat O'Neill's joke about that? I don't want to give it up on the air, but it's really hilarious. He's funny, man. That guy's a fuck. That guy's a joke machine. Pat O'Neill. I Speaker 7 (2:17) think Pat is, you know, I had him on my show, too, right after I saw him on Kill Tony. Speaker 6 (2:22) So funny. Speaker 7 (2:23) And, you know, it's amazing. Kill Tony, what was the kid's name that opened last night? Oh, you weren't there Monday night. I was there Monday night. The young kid, he's from Alabama. Do you know who I'm talking about? I Speaker 6 (2:37) do Speaker 7 (2:37) know. Speaker 6 (2:37) He just got the golden ticket. Yeah. When I Speaker 7 (2:40) was hosting. And you were there that night. Let me text Speaker 6 (2:43) Tony. I'll find out. Find out. It might not have been aired yet. No, Speaker 5 (2:47) it Speaker 6 (2:47) hasn't. Has it aired? I just don't know his name. Fuck, Speaker 5 (2:49) the Speaker 6 (2:49) kid's hilarious. He works at the club, too. Cool kid, too. And, you know, I was living in Alabama. Decided to take a chance. Brent Reid? Brent Reid. Speaker 7 (2:56) Yeah, Brent Reid. He's opening for me tonight. Funny Speaker 6 (2:58) motherfucker, dude. And he was saying, that's right, because he was saying, like you said after you saw him on Kill Tony, hey, I'd like to have you open for me. And he was like, holy fucking shit, man. He had called his dad. He's like, Speaker 3 (3:10) I'm Speaker 6 (3:12) fucking opening for Ron White. His dad was giving him shit about Speaker 7 (3:16) his comedy career. Stand-up, you know, stand-up's not as funny as it used to be to me. It's very, very rare that I'll sit and watch somebody do stand-up and laugh out loud if I'm up on the balcony. But that kid cracked me up. He's very good. Great writing. What's amazing is that when he came back on Kill Tony, he'd only been on one time. One time. Actually not. Speaker 3 (3:42) And Speaker 7 (3:42) they already knew who he was. I mean, they gave him a round of applause like it was one of the biggest comics in the country, and he'd been on once. Yeah. And the second time was... He'd actually, Speaker 6 (3:52) I thought that too, but he had actually been on before and bombed. And he talked about that, about how he came back. And this set, he was just, he'd been working at the club. He'd been living in Austin. It's way more comfortable. Built his act up. And he was like. super honest about it. We're all chilling in the back. Very cool guy. We were just talking about it. He's like, yeah, I just had to get my shit together, man. I didn't figure out what the fuck I'm doing. And the first time I did, I kind of froze. But this time I was like, and this time he had to follow that other dude. Who was that other dude who also got a golden ticket? Right, Speaker 7 (4:25) right. Two in Speaker 6 (4:26) a row. Who's that guy? That guy was funny. Speaker 7 (4:27) Have we seen him since? I haven't seen him back up at the club. I haven't seen him Speaker 6 (4:29) since, but that guy's fucking talented, too. He was very funny. So they got two golden tickets in a row. Who was the other guy that got a golden ticket that row? He had a fun name. Like a made-up name. Give Speaker 7 (4:42) me a second, sorry. Yeah, it was like Sir... I remember. Speaker 6 (4:46) Something. Speaker 7 (4:46) I don't remember. Speaker 6 (4:47) I don't either. I don't remember, but it was hilarious. It was ridiculous. Whatever his name was was ridiculous. Speaker 7 (4:52) So I just got back from Lake Como and Verona and Zermatt, Switzerland. Oh, damn, dude. Fucking 20, 21 days. Speaker 4 (5:03) Wow. Speaker 7 (5:04) Of just... Pure relaxation. And I got to tell you, I dug every goddamn minute of it. It was 107 degrees here in Texas. Oh, the high today is 62. Yeah, that guy right there. What is his Speaker 6 (5:16) name? It's French, I think. Yeah, I know Speaker 7 (5:25) it. Speaker 6 (5:26) Francois something, right? I think it's a fake name. Speaker 5 (5:29) Let's see if he says it here. Sorry. Speaker 6 (5:31) Does he say it? Speaker 5 (5:33) I can't hear. I'll find out. Okay, Speaker 6 (5:36) tell me what it is. But that dude is very funny, too. Yeah, he's talented. Super funny in the interview, too. Like, very funny back and forth. Just a funny dude. Right. So two golden tickets in a row. But anyway, that guy killed so hard that when the other guy came on after him, it's like, holy shit. Like, you've got a tough spot here. And he murdered. And he murdered right Speaker 7 (5:55) on top of it. So when he opened for me. There were still a couple of jokes that didn't work. I mean, it wasn't like playing a Kill Tony crowd. Right, right, right. Of course, it's your crowd. And so, but he got his footing back and, you know, and did a great job for me. So, and then, is it Diedrich, the other guy? Yes, Diedrich. Yeah, Diedrich Flynn. Yeah. Fucking hilarious. I think he's... One of the best around. Absolutely. Just his demeanor on stage. He's on the show tonight, too. And that's another Speaker 6 (6:30) dude that almost didn't, like, leave Atlanta. He was stuck in Atlanta and just spinning his wheels, and he couldn't make it happen. And then he came out here and got on Keltonium. Boom! Speaker 7 (6:40) It's just such a great opportunity if you're ready for it. If you're not, it's just another passing moment, and the crowds love it, too. I mean, the crowds get it. But if you're not ready, it ain't going to happen. Steve Francois. Francois, Speaker 6 (6:54) yeah. The Speaker 5 (6:55) Comedy Cellar. I think he has that added. Speaker 6 (6:57) That's what he calls himself, the Comedy Cellar, like S-E-L-L-E-R, unlike the club. That's right. That was his crazy name, the Comedy Cellar. But very funny dude. Yeah, I mean. It's the greatest thing for comedians in the history of comedy in terms of having a real platform that if you've been banging it out on the road for seven, eight, nine, ten years, you put together a solid half hour, hour, you're really starting to tour, you're middling for guys, you're really starting to feel like a real comic, and you got one banger minute on Kill Tony, boom. Next thing you know, you show up like... Look at all these guys. Look at Ari Matty. Ari Matty goes on stage. They go fucking bananas now. Yeah, they do. William Montgomery. The Black Keys asked me to bring William Montgomery to the club because I was going up that night and they were coming to the club. They go, hey, is William Montgomery coming? I go, I'll make sure he comes. I called him up. Speaker 7 (7:49) Fuck, man. It's so much fun. Even though I enjoyed it when I first saw it out in L.A., I did not have the vision that Tony has of what it could be someday. I just thought it was a great idea, and I didn't know if it would ever go anywhere. But good God. Speaker 6 (8:08) I told him maybe like four or five years in, I go, whatever you do, don't stop doing this. I go, this is going to be one of the biggest shows in comedy. I go, this is so unique and so huge and so different. And the way you host and the way you do it is different than the way anybody else would do it. And nobody Speaker 7 (8:23) else could do it. It's all Speaker 6 (8:25) him. Speaker 7 (8:27) He really is pure genius, the show is. He's a genius host. People Speaker 6 (8:33) hate on that guy. You have no idea how talented he is. That improvisational talent that he has off the bat Speaker 7 (8:40) like Speaker 6 (8:40) that. Oh, I have an Speaker 7 (8:41) idea. Second to none. No. Second to none. Second to none. It's Speaker 6 (8:44) incredible. I was telling him a lot. He's like, really? You think so? I go, do not ever stop doing this show. This show is going to be fucking huge. Fuck, and Speaker 7 (8:51) it is too. And Speaker 6 (8:52) now it's. sells out Madison Square Garden two nights in a row. Yeah, Speaker 7 (8:55) I wish I could do that. Speaker 6 (8:57) It's amazing. I love it. I'm so happy for him. And it's so cool to watch. And it's such a positive karma show because all the comics that leave that show and they take off. Like, you know, it's just. Watching Cam Patterson on SNL, watching all these different comedians just sell out all over the country. It's incredible. I Speaker 7 (9:17) love it, man. I love it when somebody hits it. Well, Speaker 6 (9:20) it's great for all of us. It is. It's great for the club. It's great for the young people coming up to see that it's possible that someone else can make it there. It's like... It's the new, like, Hollywood, you got a sitcom thing. You know what I mean? It's, like, very similar. Because back in those days, like, when one of your friends got a sitcom, you're like, holy shit, Mike got cast on fucking Bob's cousin, whatever the fuck it is. Right. Some stupid-ass sitcom. And everybody was like, wow, maybe I can make it, too. This is the new version of that. You're seeing guys, but now it's just stand-up. Like, you have a real career in stand-up from it. Speaker 7 (9:55) Right. Which is all I've ever done. Speaker 7 (9:59) Right. That's all I've ever done is stand-up comedy. And so that's kind of a weird career, you know, not to be able to bounce to here off of anything other than just jokes. Speaker 6 (10:11) Stand-up comedy is Speaker 7 (10:12) a Speaker 6 (10:12) weird career, period. Because, you know, everyone's like psychologically fragile, right? And then you're going through these ups and downs and you're trying to sell tickets and you're trying to be relevant. Speaker 7 (10:23) And something's got to happen. Speaker 6 (10:25) Something's got to happen. Right? I mean, Speaker 7 (10:26) there's got to be a catalyst, right? And for me, it was all, you know, the blue-collar comedy tour, which now people don't even remember what that is. But at one time, it was a big deal, you know? I think most people Speaker 6 (10:37) my age remember Speaker 7 (10:38) it. Most people are Speaker 6 (10:39) also shocked that there's not another one. Some other guys haven't figured out how to do something like that. Like take that level of comics, like four of them, put them together and go on tour. Right. Well, you know, Speaker 7 (10:52) with the killers that killed Tony, it's kind of like that. It's Speaker 6 (10:56) a Speaker 7 (10:56) little bit like that. The group of some guys not as big as, you know, Foxworthy. And Foxworthy was the only real star of that show when it started. You know, he was willing to share a stage with me. And that's... That was the catalyst for me. But I'd also been doing stand-up for 14 years, and I'd been headlining comedy clubs for 11 of them. Speaker 6 (11:16) That's the thing, right? There's no substitute for the time in. And there's so many guys that are right about to crack. That's where Kill Tony really comes along. Guys that have really put that time in, really been on the road. Yeah, if Speaker 7 (11:29) you're prepared for the opportunity, then that's the best thing out there for you. And if you're not, then it was just another fucking day at the park, you know? No big deal. Then you have to figure out what the fuck you're going to do with your life. Yeah, good Speaker 6 (11:41) luck. Because you Speaker 7 (11:42) bomb Speaker 6 (11:42) on Kill Tony and you're an Uber Eats driver and you're like, oh, no. What is my life now? Speaker 7 (11:48) Yeah, you know, I'm glad that I didn't really get weird exposure early. That's the worst thing that can happen is you win a contest or something and you don't have the show to back it up with, but all of a sudden you can sell tickets and that's just a death spiral is what that is. Yeah, Speaker 6 (12:04) that could do you in. Speaker 7 (12:07) It's all there's a such a dance like Speaker 6 (12:09) what works and what doesn't work guys trying to find their voice on stage and trying to write and trying to figure out what to do and then Also might have a drinking problem also might do cocaine Also might we have oh the IRS $50,000, you know, they're like some of these guys are so fucked up but like there's some of our favorite artists. Yeah And when they crack through and then all of a sudden become comfortable and make a living, it's a fucking glorious thing to see. Speaker 7 (12:35) Yeah, it was always neat at the comedy store because all the comics park in that parking lot. And you could tell when something happened because it's either shitty cars or great cars. There was no medium cars out there. You were either broke or you had cash. And if you had cash, you had a new car. I Speaker 6 (12:49) know. There would be times you go back there. It was like Mercedes, Ferrari, Porsche, Corvette. Right, Vega. Speaker 6 (12:58) Well, there was always a lot of people that drank. I always try to talk Mark Maron to get a nice car. He would never do it. Him and Ari. I had an M3 once. I'm like, Mark, this is a sensible car. This is not too crazy. It's not too look at me. Fun to drive. It's so fun to drive. I go, dude, it makes driving a ride. You don't even have to go fast. Just the way it handles, the way it accelerates, the braking, carbon fiber brakes. It's got carbon ceramic brakes, man. It's fucking incredible. It's on rails, this thing. I was like, he goes, how much is it? And we're going back. He just couldn't be that ostentatious, I've got a lot of money guy. Even when he had a Speaker 7 (13:34) lot of money. I'm like, what's the point? I was the same way when I first started making money. Because I just assumed it was all going to end, right? Which it does, normally. And so I was like. Fuck, man. I just got to be ready for when this, I got to make as much money as I can and work as hard as I can before this whole thing comes tumbling fucking down. Wow. And it never fucking did. So now, then I was like, oh, somebody's got to put a stop to this. And then I tried to quit for a little while, but fuck, it's just too much fun. I Speaker 6 (14:06) spent every penny I had for years. I didn't give a fuck. Even when I was on TV, I was living like a baller. I was just spending all my money. I didn't save anything. I was like, if it doesn't go, if it goes out, I'm not living normal now so I could live normal forever. I'll figure out a way to live normal. But like right now I'm on fucking television. Like, give me a car. Let's go. I want to buy a house. I was like, look, if I go bankrupt, I've had my car repossessed before. I've been broke before. Like, okay, I'll be broke again. But right now I'm not broke. So I'm going to live like I'm not broke. I was living like I wasn't broke this. The past three weeks in Switzerland. That's a nice way to live, man, but I don't think you could do it forever. I think that's the thing. You have to work as hard as you do. You're always touring. You're always working on your material. You're always writing. You're always doing sets. You're at the club all the time. You're always banging it out. So for you, you've earned that. When you kick back and Speaker 3 (15:05) you got a Speaker 6 (15:05) fucking pina colada, you don't drink anymore, but you're sitting back with whatever you're doing, just... Taking in that sun, not a damn thing to do. People are feeding you food. Speaker 7 (15:14) Yeah. Speaker 6 (15:15) The Speaker 7 (15:15) work's already been done. Yeah. But you have to Speaker 6 (15:19) earn that. If you just do that, that's not good on its own. People look to that thing as if it's like Jordan Peterson's talked about that before. Like the people imagine their retirement sitting on a beach drinking margaritas. Like how many margaritas can you drink? Right. How long can you sit on that beach before now you're depressed? Or Speaker 7 (15:36) even if it's Speaker 6 (15:37) you bought a yacht. Speaker 7 (15:39) Right. How Speaker 2 (15:39) long can you sit on that? That's Speaker 6 (15:41) crazy. Speaker 7 (15:42) Before you're bored out of your skull. But, yeah, you know, it's almost 70 years old. You know, fuck yeah, I deserve all the – I get to do whatever I want. Speaker 6 (15:53) Yeah, you get to do whatever you want. But, again, like 20 days is good. Have you ever been to Switzerland? Speaker 7 (15:59) I have Speaker 6 (15:59) not. Fuck. Speaker 7 (16:01) It's beautiful. It's so gorgeous. And it's not even that. It's the infrastructure of it. You know, we're – $40 trillion in debt. We don't have a high-speed train to anywhere. Where's our shit? But you can get to the top of almost any mountain there at 70 years old. You'll take a train to here, a fucking auger cut through a mountain here, then a gondola over there, and then over the top. You can actually go to fucking Italy on gondolas from Switzerland and have dinner and come back. It was fucking gorgeous. The only thing I didn't like was pay toilets. And because I didn't have it, you have to have a dollar in Swiss francs. To Speaker 6 (16:41) take a shit? To Speaker 7 (16:41) take a shit. And I'm like, that's discrimination. Why is it discrimination? Only people with a dollar can shit here? And then, and it wouldn't take a euro, and it wouldn't take American money. But then I found out, oh, you can use a credit card. So I have to borrow money to shit. Speaker 4 (16:58) And make Speaker 7 (16:59) payments. It's a dollar. A dollar to Speaker 3 (17:02) shit. Yeah, but if you don't have Speaker 7 (17:03) one of those dollars, you've got to get your credit card out and swipe it on this toilet. Speaker 6 (17:07) I guess after a while, everybody adjusts, and you just keep a dollar with you if you're going to go out in case you have to shit. And that way, at least you keep the riffraff out of the toilets. Yeah, well, Speaker 7 (17:17) the riffraff got to shit somewhere. They do. You don't want them shitting on the street. And I was about to shit on the floor if I couldn't find a way in, and finally another guy behind me said, your credit card works. Speaker 6 (17:28) You should be able to do Apple Pay. Speaker 7 (17:30) Yeah, straight through to the shitter. Yeah. Speaker 6 (17:33) But Speaker 7 (17:33) I loved it. I had so much fun. Lake Como was so beautiful. Well, you know, Speaker 6 (17:37) Switzerland has famously been neutral, right? That's Switzerland. And a lot of banks. A lot of banks go over there, right? A lot of money, and they don't spend any of it on war. Speaker 7 (17:48) Yeah, they don't spend a dime of it on war. And I was asking, you know, it was kind of interesting because I went to – to France almost exactly a year before. And I got kicked off that cruise ship, the little Viking cruise. Did I ever Speaker 2 (18:04) tell you that story about getting kicked off of that fucking thing? Speaker 6 (18:07) This episode is brought to you by NBC. When you put agents from the Secret Service, U.S. Marshals, DOJ, and FBI together, it makes for pretty lively dinner table conversation. Line of Fire is NBC's gripping new drama about the Hollingsworths, a tight-knit family of law enforcement agents. Each week, they work together on high-stakes cases, taking down the country's most dangerous criminals. Like any family, the Hollingsworths don't always see eye to eye, but they always have each other's backs. After all, working in the federal government isn't just their job, it's the family business. Line of Fire premieres Monday, September 21 at 10, 9 central, after The Voice on NBC and the next day on Peacock. Speaker 7 (18:52) I knew it was going to be a problem when I saw the boat, right, because I got weed and gummies and shit. And I'm like, I don't know if this is going to work or not, but I'll just see what I can get away with, right? And then I'll deny it and then do something different. You know, we park the boat every day. I can just get off the boat and smoke. I don't really care. Speaker 1 (19:11) And the fucking people came down on me so hard at Speaker 7 (19:15) Viking Cruises. And the captain of the ship confronted me in front of a bunch of people, really loud and aggressive. And called me a liar. Were you lying? No, I was smoking pot out on my deck. Which is where the first guy came in and said, hey, listen, you can't smoke pot in your room. But if you want to smoke pot on your deck, well, that's what I had been doing. But I hadn't been real careful about keeping the doors shut. And this was the hotel manager guy, not the captain of the ship. And he was the nicest guy ever. And he meant me no harm. Just figure this out, you know. Well, the next day we were parked right at the dock, and the dock was right there, right off my balcony. And I'm sitting there in a cloud, in a little puff, going anywhere. And he calls and says, hey, the captain wants to talk to you. And I'm like, do I know what it's about? And he goes, yeah, you know. And I'm like, all right. And they came in just in the hallway, just dressed me down. And I said, no, I was smoking pot where that guy told me to. other dude. And he goes, I think you were smoking pot in your, in your bathroom. And he got in the ventilation system. Oh, you just made that shit up, dude. You just called me a liar. I'm one of your customers. I bought a suite on this goddamn thing. And he said, you listen to me. And at the end of it, he goes, well, listen, if you want to smoke pot on the top deck, maybe I could look the other way. Why didn't you open with that? Speaker 6 (20:38) Yeah. Instead of jumping Speaker 7 (20:39) my Speaker 6 (20:39) fucking ass. And how illegal is pot over there? Speaker 7 (20:42) Oh, you know, I was in the wrong. You know, it's probably illegal. But I mean, how illegal? No, not really. I Speaker 6 (20:48) mean, Speaker 7 (20:48) you can still buy in Paris. You can get a fucking card and go in and buy weed. Okay. Well, that's silly, man. Speaker 6 (20:55) God, the whole thing's so silly that that's still an issue. I get the whole smoking pot publicly. It is gross, especially to non-smokers and people with families. Yeah, and I forget how strong the Speaker 7 (21:06) smell is. Yeah, Speaker 6 (21:07) it's strong. I get that. I understand that. That makes sense to me, but the laws against it are just stupid. They're just fucking stupid Speaking of Speaker 7 (21:17) felon, you can't Speaker 3 (21:18) do Speaker 7 (21:18) that on the air. Speaker 3 (21:19) I'm Speaker 7 (21:19) not it's a cigar. Okay Speaker 6 (21:22) You can smoke that on the air. I brought you one, too. Oh, thank Speaker 7 (21:25) you. Speaker 6 (21:25) Let's go. Speaker 7 (21:26) Actually, I can't tell you where it's from. Uh-oh. Because that's a felony, too. Why? Huh? Oh, is this from that other country? Some foreign country. I actually bought it. I Speaker 6 (21:37) think those are legal to have. No, they're not. I think Cuban cigars are legal to have, and that's not what we're talking about. Because these definitely wouldn't be Cuban cigars. No. But I think Cuban cigars are legal to have. I think you're allowed to have a certain amount of them now. Where it used to be there was an embargo to all trade to Cuba, and I think there's a limited amount of Cuban cigars you're allowed to possess. Speaker 7 (21:58) Let's look that up. I don't think that's right. Speaker 6 (22:00) I believe that's the case. Do you need a lighter, sir? There you go. Thank you very much. Ron White, ladies and gentlemen. Boy, this smells like south of Florida. Yeah. Speaker 5 (22:17) This is tough. Speaker 6 (22:19) Damn, these are legit. Speaker 6 (22:22) Damn this is a real thing Ron White. Yeah it is. There's like a loophole. Isn't it weird? There's a loophole? Yeah. Isn't it weird how like some countries are just way better at certain shit? Can you buy Cuban cigars at a U.S. shop? No. No. Can you order Cuban cigars online for delivery to the U.S.? No. Yeah you can. Smoke a Cuban cigar while abroad where the law permits it? Generally yes, but do not bring it back. What? That's crazy. Imagine... They're telling you whether or not you can smoke a Cuban cigar if you're in England. Right. I used to get them from England. I had a dude in England that would send them to me. This is way back in the Dizzee. And he would send me a box of them with no bands on them. And then he would send me a separate bag with all the bands in it in an envelope. Speaker 7 (23:12) Notice these don't have bands on them. Speaker 6 (23:13) That's the thing. Yeah. But there's so many fake ones. Speaker 7 (23:17) No, that's the most counterfeited thing in the world is. Cohiba cigars. Speaker 6 (23:24) It Speaker 7 (23:25) says for Speaker 6 (23:26) a period ending September 2020, travelers could bring limited Cuban cigars back for personal use. That exemption was removed. Exception was removed. Current CBP guidance says people subject to U.S. jurisdiction may acquire Cuban goods while outside the United States in certain circumstances. but may not import Cuban-origin tobacco products into the country. Well, thank Speaker 7 (23:49) God these aren't Cuban. Yeah, thank God. Well, I bought them in Switzerland, so I assume they're Swiss. They must be. They must be. Speaker 6 (23:55) They're really Speaker 7 (23:55) good at everything over there, including cheese. Well, they're good at cigars. That's Zeno Davidoff from Switzerland. Speaker 6 (24:02) Oh, really? Speaker 7 (24:02) Yeah. Where do they get Speaker 6 (24:03) their tobacco? Speaker 7 (24:05) Well, he was rolling cigars. He was making cigars in Cuba, but he smelled the whole thing coming before everybody else did and moved to Dominican Republic. And before he did that, he moved seeds over there, started plantations, moved his rollers over there. So really, when that all went down, the only really good cigar you could get was Davidoff. Speaker 6 (24:23) It's kind of crazy how the Cubans really are so much better. Speaker 7 (24:28) There's like a level. They're a level above. They're a level above, and one of it is the rollers. You know, they just had generational rollers, and they have these big rolling rooms. Somebody would sit up in front of the thing and read them books, and they'd just sit there and roll these beautiful fucking classic cigars that smoke gorgeous and taste gorgeous. Well, if you don't have that, there have been companies that have bought other cigar companies just to get their rollers and then discontinue the line altogether. Now I need these guys twisting up some fucking— Speaker 6 (24:55) Yeah, you need the wizards. Speaker 7 (24:57) Yeah. Speaker 6 (24:57) There was a place in Miami where we used to go to when we would do the Miami improv. And you could go and watch these people who used to be in Cuba, and now they're in Miami, rolling cigars. Watch them do it. And making beautiful cigars. Speaker 7 (25:11) And they'd cut it and Speaker 6 (25:11) roll it out, and they'd sell you the cigars right there. It was incredible. You'd watch them do it. Speaker 7 (25:16) And that is pure contraband, too, you know, because that tobacco's coming from somewhere. Yeah, I don't know Speaker 6 (25:22) where they're getting it. I don't know if they even said. I don't remember. It was a long time ago. You know, you can get great cigars from Nicaragua, great cigars from the Dominican Republic, but there is a difference. Yeah, there's a difference. It's crazy. You know, it's a really small area, too, where they grow the best. It's a little tiny Speaker 7 (25:39) place. And actually, you can still buy pre-embargo Cuban cigars in America. So if it was rolled and brought into the country before the embargo, they're legal. And there's Speaker 1 (25:51) a Speaker 7 (25:51) market for them. And they're expensive. Speaker 1 (25:52) Pre Speaker 7 (25:53) -embargo Speaker 1 (25:53) Cuban cigars. How Speaker 3 (25:55) old are Speaker 7 (25:55) those? Well, they have to have been kept the whole time in humidors. Whoa. But these big, rich guys that, you know, cigars were a penny. And then Cuban cigars came available, and they were a nickel. Nobody going to pay a nickel. You know, this is 120 years ago. And... But it turns out they did pay a nickel, and they were just that much better. And then those guys, when they heard about that embargo, they bought everything there was and built these huge humidors. And when they died, those things went on the market. Oh, wow. I stayed at the Fairmont Hotel in San Francisco, and they have a Cuban cigar. outlet in that hotel. Whoa. I bought one because it was like $200. So Speaker 6 (26:39) it was like a 1960 cigar? Speaker 7 (26:41) 62 or something like that. That's crazy. See if you Speaker 6 (26:44) can find those online. Are those available online? Speaker 7 (26:47) I'm sure they are. Speaker 6 (26:48) That's a crazy Speaker 7 (26:49) thing. Speaker 6 (26:49) Yeah, Speaker 7 (26:49) it's pre-embargo Speaker 6 (26:50) Cubans. You know, JFK, or RF, yeah, JFK, rather. JFK did that before he made the embargo. He bought a shitload of cigars and brought them back. You motherfucker. Yeah, and he knew what he was doing. You motherfucker. He knew what he was doing. You motherfucker. Yeah. You did that, and then you made them illegal. Speaker 6 (27:06) Yeah. What's up? Speaker 5 (27:09) I had to click when I was 18 plus on Reddit to look at a picture of them. It says it's NSFW Speaker 6 (27:15) content, Speaker 5 (27:15) and it's just pictures of cigars. Why Speaker 6 (27:18) is that not safe for work? I have no idea. Speaker 5 (27:20) It looks like the whole cigar thing is all NSFW. Speaker 6 (27:23) Pre-embargo 1962. Are those for sale, or are they just photos? I was just Speaker 5 (27:27) finding a photo. I thought that was super strange. Speaker 6 (27:29) I Speaker 5 (27:29) didn't even get to see Speaker 6 (27:30) it. Speaker 5 (27:30) That is super Speaker 6 (27:30) strange. Speaker 5 (27:31) I probably can't find them on eBay, I bet. Speaker 6 (27:33) It's porn for cigar people. Yeah. Right? They just want to stare at them. I felt it move. Speaker 3 (27:40) What Speaker 6 (27:40) is it about men who love collecting things that are hard to Speaker 7 (27:45) get? Well, I think that once you have money and then all the things you thought you wanted, you get those, and then you want something you can't have. This is not too bad. This one is 300 Speaker 6 (27:57) bucks for Speaker 5 (27:58) one Speaker 6 (27:58) cigar. I wonder if it's Speaker 5 (28:00) a bundle of 25. Speaker 6 (28:01) What? Really? I Speaker 5 (28:02) think it's a bundle of 25. Speaker 6 (28:03) That's ridiculous. That's really cheap. That's cheap for any Cuban cigar. Wow. That can't be possible. No. Speaker 7 (28:11) I paid more than that for it. These guys are fucking you. Speaker 6 (28:14) Probably Speaker 5 (28:14) fake. This is how you get. I bet. Maybe Speaker 6 (28:16) it's not. Stumble across Speaker 7 (28:17) fake Speaker 4 (28:17) sneakers Speaker 5 (28:17) really quickly. But Speaker 4 (28:19) is Speaker 5 (28:19) that Speaker 6 (28:19) really? Speaker 5 (28:20) Look at Speaker 4 (28:20) the reviews. You think it's real? Speaker 6 (28:22) It's all four stars. I would just say if Speaker 5 (28:24) you guys are already saying the price isn't right, this is some fake shit. Speaker 6 (28:26) I don't know. Ron would be the one to know. I didn't even know about this until 20 minutes ago. Maybe it's real. Speaker 5 (28:32) This is how people. I'm telling you to buy fake Jordans. Jamie, let's order a Speaker 6 (28:35) box. Speaker 5 (28:36) I can't imagine that that's real. Order a box, Speaker 6 (28:38) please. Add to cart. Speaker 5 (28:39) Who's going to smoke it first and test it? Me. Speaker 6 (28:41) I will. Ron and I will. We'll bring it to the club. Just pause that. Just put that aside. Send it to me. I'll order a box. We'll see what's up. All right. As long as we don't get in trouble. That's totally legal? Yeah, it's totally Speaker 7 (28:57) legal. If it's pre-embargo. It didn't say that in the other thing. It didn't say pre-embargo. Speaker 5 (29:01) Here's Speaker 7 (29:01) a Speaker 5 (29:01) review. First five-pack I bought was not good. Every single cigar was plugged and didn't have a smooth and easy draw. Not just from this particular cigar, but Camacho as a whole. And Speaker 6 (29:10) he still gave him four stars? However, the handwritten thank you card I received, I never forgot. It gave Cigar City a second chance for the latest five-pack I bought. It was well worth the price. It's a sad day when the Cuba tobacco bundlers for this cigar are all used up. This may be my number one favorite cigar hands down. The transition between each third is absolutely incredible. So the first five-pack sucked, and the second five-pack was insane. Speaker 5 (29:37) Interesting. Speaker 6 (29:37) Huh. Well, they're cheap. Maybe they have ten Speaker 5 (29:41) reviews total, seven or fives, and three or fours. I'm just saying. Speaker 6 (29:47) Take a swing at five cigars. Fuck it. Speaker 7 (29:52) You can handle it. Yeah, we'll see what's up. We'll be all Speaker 6 (29:56) right. I bought Speaker 7 (29:57) dumber shit. No. Speaker 6 (30:00) For Speaker 7 (30:00) sure. How's that Speaker 6 (30:02) fucking Corvette you got baby? How's that thing Speaker 7 (30:05) somebody wants to buy it from you know who who? Jay McGraw does he oh yeah, he Speaker 6 (30:12) get one of those he can get one built. You don't want to sell yours Yours is yours. You're set up. Yeah, that's my Speaker 7 (30:17) car that Speaker 6 (30:18) thing's beautiful man. Yeah, you can't sell that That's you have to keep that that's someday when you die that'll go on auction It'll be worth a fuckload of money that thing is beautiful, and it's got a bar in the trunk Speaker 7 (30:30) It doesn't have it anymore. I took it out because it didn't have a top because I wanted that bar for whatever fucking reason, Joe. Did you get Speaker 6 (30:40) Colvin in Austin? Did they do the work on it? I think they did, right? Yeah. Casey? Yeah, he's the best. Speaker 7 (30:46) They've done some of the work. Some of it was done in Atlanta. I mean, the basic build was done in Atlanta, but the setup on it was done by Kurt Busch's race team. He was testing tires at his oval track, and he said, bring it out here, because he knew I was building it. And he said, I'll have a guy set it up for you. Oh, that's awesome. And so there's footage on the internet of him driving at 170 miles an hour on an oval track and me going, what the fuck, dude? He's doing donuts in it. I'm like, god damn, I just had that fucking paint job. You Speaker 3 (31:17) could drive it. Set Speaker 7 (31:18) it Speaker 3 (31:18) up. Speaker 7 (31:20) He said, we need to drop that front end an inch. And I said, well, yeah, what if we drop that front? Ron, we need to drop the front end an inch. You don't need to ask questions. I'm like, okay. Drop the front end an inch, buddy. You know more about this shit than I do, don't you? Those Speaker 6 (31:37) guys, I can't really drive. I can drive. I mean, I've been around a track a few times. I know how to drive, but not like. These guys know, they feel things that you and I wouldn't feel. They're like, oh, the left camber is off. This is off. There's something going on. It's, you know, they have all, you know, the understeer is off. Something's off. I don't like these tires. Like, they feel it with their ass. Speaker 7 (31:57) Yeah. Yeah. And they did a beautiful fucking job on it. And it's so much fun to drive. It scares me a little bit because, you know, it's just got so much power. It's so light. And nothing to it. But running over. running over 500 horsepower. I just had fuel injection put on it because it was running kind of rough early on, you know, when I'd get a start and start cold. But now it just, boom, boom. Speaker 6 (32:21) Yeah, was it a carburetor set up before that? Yeah. Yeah, those stink too. The problem is they make your whole car stink like gasoline. You're like, whew. I used to like that. I still Speaker 7 (32:31) like the smell of gasoline. There's something about you getting in an old muscle car, you smell that Speaker 6 (32:35) gasoline, you're like, yeah, America. Speaker 6 (32:39) A lot of it is nostalgia. Nostalgia from the time when I was a kid, muscle cars were the thing. Well, Speaker 7 (32:47) mine was born the same year I was, 1956. So it's been around 70 years, that car, just like me, still running, just like me. Right, Speaker 6 (32:59) but it's got all new parts. Speaker 7 (33:00) Yeah, it's not the same Speaker 6 (33:01) car. Speaker 7 (33:01) We've got to work on that with you. We could have driven away what we didn't use. Speaker 6 (33:05) Yeah, that's Speaker 7 (33:06) the Speaker 6 (33:06) same with mine, my 65. There's nothing in that other than the outside. Right, that's all mine is too. The frame and Speaker 7 (33:12) everything. Speaker 6 (33:13) Dashboard and some of that stuff. Everything else, it's got an Art Morrison chassis on it and coilover springs and disc brakes and supercharger. It's got an LS engine in it. That thing is, there's nothing about that that's an old car. I Speaker 7 (33:31) got to tell you, that yours is the prettiest Corvette I've seen. When I first saw that one, I was like, man, I didn't think anybody could beat me in the Corvette department. Speaker 6 (33:41) That thing's stunning. Speaker 7 (33:42) That thing's a dream boat. When I first saw it, Speaker 6 (33:44) I was like, oh, shit. When I first saw it, it was a lot different. I brought it to my friend Steve Strope. When I first saw it, it had the grossest interior. It had cheap Corvette. bucket seats from like a maybe like a c4 corvette or a c5 they were terrible seats and the interior sucked and the the shifter sucked And it was a little underpowered. It didn't have the supercharger in it. And I brought it to Steve Strope. But it did have the chassis. And so we upgraded the suspension. And then he upgraded everything else and completely redid the interior and put, like, really solid bucket seats that grip you and wider tire and brake set up. And Speaker 7 (34:24) we Speaker 6 (34:24) got those cool wheels. Those wheels are sick. Yeah, that's what really set it Speaker 7 (34:29) off. Show a Speaker 6 (34:30) photo of that, Jamie. There's a photo of me with Jamie. Jay Leno when I did Jay Leno's garage with it. The wheels are controversial. People either love them or they hate them. I fucking love them. I think it just, I wouldn't like them on, I don't think on many cars, but on that car, it's like the perfect wheel for it. Speaker 7 (34:46) What's that green car? I saw you driving out last night. Yeah, that's my other car. Oh, yeah, look at that son of a bitch. Look at Speaker 6 (34:52) that. Those wheels rule, dude. Those are fucking badass wheels, Speaker 7 (34:56) man. They Speaker 6 (34:56) rule for that car. That thing is sick. So that was all red. The stripe was red. Steve Strope turned