Hey, Bad or Badder!? (Feat. Geoff Schwartz)

The Dan Le Batard Show

In this episode of The Dan Le Batard Show, Dan and guest Geoff Schwartz dive into a mix of sports culture, NFL updates, and absurd hypotheticals, including debating the relative offensiveness of leaving grocery carts versus spitting in urinals. The conversation also touches on NFL uniform numbers, player recoveries, team strategies, and the irony of the NFL banning alcohol in locker rooms despite

Key takeaways

• Leaving grocery carts out is a minor social offense, but spitting gum in urinals is a 'war crime' in the hosts' view.
• The NFL's strict anti-gambling rules are maintained despite partnerships with betting companies like DraftKings.
• The hosts highlight the contradiction of banning alcohol in locker rooms while allowing beer sponsorships.

Transcript preview

got a lot to get to here. Jeff Schwartz is jumping in to talk about Stafford and Penix and two and all the rest of it, but you know people bellyache all the time fellas about the grocery card guy, the guy who doesn't return it to its station, but I contend that even worse is the guy who spits his gum into the u-r-r-t-in fact let's start the show and then we can talk about it. Yes, hi and hello my fellow football Americans and welcome to football America presented as ever by our pals over at D.K. sports now in 50 states that's all of them if my math is correct so good news for you if you are in fact in one of those states and I we have a lot to get to as I just said there very quickly hello Gina Fuentes and hello buddy Badowski which is worse the grocery cart non-participant or you only use it for what you need it for and then you just leave it right there or is it before you respond the gum in the urinal guy you understand that when you spit your gum into the urinal that you are peeing in or just peed in that means another grown up has to go in there and clean out that gun with his hand whether there's no device I don't you put your hand in there and now yeah now your gum which is already enough to make me throw up now is also stained by your pee. How say you? It's not just your pee, it's everyone else's pee that came in after you. So that's European, right. Yeah, exactly. That guy is definitely the worst. And in fact, we have friends that work at supermarkets that said they love going out to collect carts. They go outside, they don't have to listen to their boss for a little while they're put on their headphones. Sometimes they listen to a playlist while they're out there. Vitamin. I don't see a problem with the guy. They don't. They go outside. They don't. They don't. They go outside. They don't. They don't. They don't. They don't I don't see what's so bad about that you just pee right over it gives you a little I just told you why are you a human being do you want to pick up somebody's gum that has been stained and pee no but I feel like they just kind of leave it there and it just kind of breaks down or does whatever it does doesn't find away and gets you know turn off buddies mike I don't see a problem with this guy I have I like being able to have a little target down there you know something to aim at and you whenever I want to but also I'm aware that I am a participant in the game of life with other people who are out there playing it too. Listen enough from you buddy for a second here very quickly Gina let's tend to our business as we do at the top of every episode this is episode number 70 I like this number quite a bit as a uniform number which NFL or nay which athlete wore it best in man's recorded history. Okay we're gonna go to recent memory here is Zach Martin Dallas Cowboys Guard probably one probably one dominant guards in NFL history. Jim Marshall might get some play later on in the show and stay tuned for that. He actually wore number 70 as well. But I mean in terms of NFL players. Wrong way. Not a Hall of Fame. Not a Hall of Fame. There's some hockey influence here, right? Yeah, we got the hockey number I found. I mean 70 you would just kind of expect to be a great hockey number. The most important, most influential hockey guy I saw was Bray and Holtby who won the Stanley Cup with the Washington capitals in 2018. off Zach Martin, has there ever been a guard that came out in the draft that was more coveted that was more like, this guy will change your entire team than Zach Martin. A guard. Quentin Nelson comes close. Okay, yeah, that was the cold. Yeah, that was the cold. Yeah, that was the other guy was singing of. Yeah, yeah. And Sam Huff, too, wore it for Washington and for the giants. And it's a great, it feels like an old number. Yeah. But I think I think it's high time to bring it back to bring it back. number Vita Veia out there in 50 is lame. Why would you take like 61 when 70 is there waiting for you to grab off the rack right? I think I think it's a it's what's close to this and if you're at 70 why not drop it to 69? It's much more fun. Oh yeah. You know what? I think that's bad and now I want to go back to some more of these because I'm not done complaining yet. Yes that's right. The guy who wears number 69 or the guy who wears number 1. Buddy Badowski, which is worse. I like this now. This is... We have we have a new segment now. Worse or worser. Bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Hey bad or batter. Okay, batter. Bad or batter. Okay, batter. The guy who thinks he's hysterical. 69 for the guy who's so arrogant or narcissistic or whatever that he's like yeah one well Dave I'm gonna tell you number one I'm gonna tell you right now that when I was a kid I played little league I was the smallest kid on my team every year so I got number one because it was the smallest Jersey because the Jersey sizes went in order from like small to large so 13 would be like the biggest guy on the team were 13 I wore one so one became my favorite number and I would ask I would get one I would get one for one every year so it's absolutely the guy who thinks he's funny and cheeky by wearing 69 like the guy who buys a jersey at the team store and presses number 16 I'm not a guy you got to go with a player that's on you see what number I got dudes exactly oh dude I'm so funny I got 69 no I hate don't put your own last name don't put anything stupid you know beers 69 or anything like that or you know anything stupid like that pick your favorite player put your favorite player on the back of the jersey and go on with your day 70 is nice is what I think here's another one hey batter batter hey batter batter hey bad or batter to this now now let's get topical because you guys are obsessed with the soccer right now and we'll give you some picks for the weekend in just a little bit here for the World Cup action the pundit Becky, the pounding of the table, that she apologized for having the temerity, the gall, to make a prediction that a team with Jaylon Brunson, who is short, is not capable of winning a title if he's your best player, a guy that diminutive, and people now say, you were wrong. Well, that's her job is to some degree is to make predictions. Badder, or Gino Fuentes. Why are we messing with her? I mean, she took a shot. on a prediction she got it wrong a lot of how many sports pundits got that one wrong I thought it was gonna be one banyama season starting right away yeah I mean well I have everybody got it wrong neither one is bad what it that's my answer no I mean she's doing her job she made a prediction how long ago two years ago three years ago and you're because you're think it's new york it's sensitive pretty obvious what happened here is a shit about this water break thing what am i'm missing they're drinking a game, huh? I don't give a shit about the hydration breaks. My problem is there is some sanctity to the no commercials during a soccer game. And the fact that Fox immediately from the first game was like, hey, we're going to have commercials during this hydration break. Hydration breaks have been in the game for a long time. I don't mind them at all. I think in fact, they're good. You don't want anybody passing out there out out there from heat stroke. It's fine with me. The bigger problem is. The bigger problem is. that's 90 minutes long with no commercials and that's the best thing about it and I hate that they've thrown this three minutes of commercials into my soccer I don't like it. If I'm not mistaken the first one on Fox they even missed the the re kick right? Yeah yeah and that's just something the first thing I learned in sports journalism school was you cannot miss any live action. You're a journalist oh I didn't really I meant my regard for you is through the roof now all of a sudden you know me and as we're journalists. answers for us because he does not just play or used to play the game of football. No he's an active member at the game of life. He is Jeff Schwartz. Host of Jeff Schwartz is smarter than you getting a little upgrade with all due respect to Jeff because now two Schwartz is better than one Mitchell Schwartz joining the show these days that's going to be even better why I've already indulged it a little bit it's great stuff it's Jeff. It's Jeff Schwartz what's the poop fella how you've been how some are going beyond you coaching up this giant human being little league baseball and such. It's summer's good. Kids go to camp in about like 10 days for a month. One goes for a month, one goes for a month, one goes for two weeks, so we'll have some downtime here in the Schwartz household. We have my brothers are in the podcast women as you. We're kind of with names. I look, the power of the shorts, I like that one obviously, I don't know if we have to get some permission to use that. Let's work on that's the easy. Don't go with the first one that hit your brain that's trademarked so that would probably be out. So we'll let smarter people than me come up with a name. One of the things that Mitch, I was like, Mitch, you want to do the pocket, he says, yeah, we just, we had changed the name. That was like, his first thing he said to me was, he got changed the name. It was like, fine, you could be smarter than me, okay? Maybe it's just smart as smart as everyone else. But Mitch and I'm planning and they have a question. You guys are more handsome though. You'll have. So, though. You'll have. You'll have. You'll have. So, you'll have. We definitely are more handsome. I think people would agree on that. Yeah. We don't have a famous musician in our circle. I was telling my buddy with online masterminds. We have our offensive line convention coming up soon. You know, the tight ends are doing the tight end you thing. They bring Taylor Swift on stage. We need an office line to marry an international music star so we can upgrade our activities. I'm not a singer necessarily. I'll do it if that's what you need. But I'd rather just come up there. I could just tell stories. I could just tell stories. or so that would get that like that would be a good warm up I'll just sit out there and tell my my little anecdotes you know would that be yeah I'm sure that would draw the crowd I'm sure that would be quite better way who thinks he's cooler the difference between how cool he thinks he looks versus how the rest of us think who's more off the guy who dresses in the tour to France gear to go for a bike ride or the motorcycle guy on the freeway who when he goes by you and you like pull overlay he gives you the deuce as he goes by because he thinks he's so cool on the back of his bike but really is a huge pain and they ass slowing you down. Okay I think it's definitely the motorcycle because at least the bikers getting some exercise it's something productive what they're like I'm not saying you can't be productive on a motorcycle but you know they're getting to work out it right like they you know they got an aerodynamic helmet the expensive bike like they're working out the guy the motorcycle to your point like just just move it along buddy like we're all here we're all getting somewhere we're all driving somewhere for purpose and just this can they get angry like what what you're you try to get by ain't my concern friend in his effort to trademark Iceman, which is of course somebody else's nickname. It's actually a few other people's nickname before you even arrived on the on the big blue marble, Caleb. There was George Gervin, there was Val Kilmer, that's just off the top of my head. Would you rather have to deal with the shame, the indignity of wearing someone else's a previous legend's nickname? Or would you rather go by stink? As Mark Schler. Oh, I'd much rather go by stink. Why would. Why would you want to nickname in the world? Well, so the idea is that you basically have a unique nickname, right? Like not just, so you have to go by Stink or any unique nickname. Because I mean obviously the stink one is, you know, it's not the best nickname in the world for what it's. But also I just think going by someone else's nickname is kind of lame. Like come up with your own thing. Yeah, amen. Amen. Okay, you're good at this game as I expected that you would be. Hey, you hear the great news my initial Super Bowl 61 pick is now out I know you know it because I texted it to you because I was I was excited for your response to it once again we're doing it once upon a time in Hollywood or in Inglewood L. A V L A. L A. L A. A. How say you I think the Rams are certainly capable of doing that the chargers again I love you just you just can't quit the chargers. What's Jim Harbaw? You understand it's not like I'm doing it's not doing it just out of like they've updated the team. The team. The team. I'm because both of the tackles are hurt and that's the way Harbot teams are found out foundational bill right so it makes sense to do it that way I and Mike McDaniels are really really impressive hire for them I would like to see them like win a couple of playoff games before I decide they're gonna be in the Super Bowl you know I mean and again it's it's fair to say that sometimes you don't you haven't done it yet like doing didn't do it until they did it right so you can't So they're very, the charges I think are going to be very good this season. The tackles being back is hugely important to them. The McDaniel is a big deal. The wide receiver room is a little bit thin, but I think defensively they're going to be good. So they don't need to have great wide receivers. Herbrick's got to put it together, right? Like all of it together. There's a lot