The Adventure Zone Providence: Episode 1

The Adventure Zone

In the premiere episode of The Adventure Zone Providence, three minor gods—Spintura, Tintabula, and Minutiae—are tasked with investigating a

Key takeaways

• The gods are investigating the 'anti-God' ritual, which threatens to sever the connection between the Providence and Mortal planes.
• Spira serves as the God of Bellows, Tintabula as the God of Bells, and Minutiae as the God of Marine Chronometers.

Main topics

• TTRPG gameplay mechanics
• The Providence Plane lore

Notable quotes

We're God thick in this one.

Conclusion

A high-energy, comedic introduction to a new campaign that establishes

Transcript preview

Speaker 5 (1:04) Welcome, mortals, to Taz Providence, an adventure of divine proportions. Huh? Is that anything? Proportions, you think? Divine energy. I like divine proportions. Divine Speaker 6 (1:20) proportions Speaker 5 (1:20) sounds like we're size queens. Speaker 6 (1:21) We're God Speaker 5 (1:21) thick in this one. And we're coming Speaker 7 (1:23) up on the Thanksgiving holiday, so divine proportions sounds great. I love Speaker 5 (1:27) divine portions. Big pies. Speaker 7 (1:30) Big meats. You Speaker 5 (1:31) know, that's what I'm Speaker 6 (1:32) all about. Big pies, thin meats. Big pies, thin meats. We Speaker 7 (1:37) have Speaker 4 (1:37) thin meats. Speaker 6 (1:41) I don't actually love the energy this one's starting off with. It's a little randy if I'm being Speaker 4 (1:45) frank. If it's possible for us. Thin meets big franks. Thick gods. Speaker 5 (1:54) We're going to be using Supernormal, which is a one-page game system created by Ursadice. U-R-S-I-D-I-C-E. If you want to follow along, you can go to Ursadice.com slash Supernormal for the PDF of it there. Support them in any way that you can. It's a super fun game system. If you've heard our live show, Just Us. where they played as superheroes trying to blend in with the world than you've heard us use it before. Was Speaker 4 (2:20) that the one at the company picnic? Speaker 5 (2:21) Yes, it was. Oh, yeah, God, yeah. I didn't hear that one. I'm going to be lost. Right, Trev? Well, no, Justin, you were there. Speaker 6 (2:27) I know. It was like for the audience. Speaker 5 (2:29) No, Speaker 6 (2:30) they Speaker 5 (2:30) don't. This is not a continuation of this. This is a brand new. Yeah, a brand new adventure iteration. No well Speaker 6 (2:38) god. Speaker 5 (2:38) God. I hate Speaker 6 (2:39) calling things adventures. It's Speaker 7 (2:40) such a Speaker 6 (2:41) big check It's in the name of the fucking thing too right? I know it's so Speaker 7 (2:44) tough. You can't just have a like here's a Confection you know yeah, like Speaker 6 (2:49) here's a simple twistery for you like it's another one another bubble from McElroy's mind Yeah, it can't ever be that Let Speaker 5 (3:00) us begin Our actual play TTRPG begins as all actual play TTRPGs begin with a god complex. Specifically, the god complex building at the center of the Providence Plain, which is home to those that the people of the Mortal Plain would refer to as the gods. These two planes overlap each other, but exist on two separate celestial wavelengths. The two planes have a symbiotic relationship with one another. You see, while the inanimate objects of the mortal plane lack free will, they are still charged up with erratic random potential energy, which they are unable to disperse. If this weren't dealt with, all of these things would begin to behave so wildly that there is no way of telling what chaos would be unleashed. Fortunately for the mortals, the beings of the Providence plane need this random potential energy to survive. Every inhabitant is synced with one or more type of object, draws on its energy, and filters it back as pure potential energy. In short, for every type of thing on the mortal plane, there is a god in the providence plane connected to it. That said, not all these objects are created equally, which leads us back to the god complex, where the most charged up of the gods are gathered to discuss an issue of the utmost importance. The god of fire calls the meeting to order. A symbol of the gods of the Pantheon. We have had troubling reports from the mortal realm. Someone is putting together a ritual. A chorus of haramps erupts from the room. If you guys could help me out with that. Speaker 4 (4:37) Harumph, harumph, harumph, harumph, harumph. Oh, yes, yes. Speaker 6 (4:40) Justin Speaker 4 (4:41) didn't harumph. Speaker 6 (4:42) I harumphed. I harumphed. It just wasn't very loud. Yes, we gods Speaker 5 (4:47) all hate rituals. But it's worse than that. This ritual is a dark ritual. The gods let out a simultaneous and terrified harumph. Speaker 2 (4:59) Harumph? Speaker 5 (5:01) The god of storms stands. Fire. Let me pop down there. I'll stop it in a flash. The whole thing will be a breeze. Yes, excellent weather-based puns aside, the last time you left the Providence Plain, storms were erratic within five minutes. Remember that tornado full of sharks? Yes, the tornado shark. Yes, of course I remember. Ah, I see that the god of both stone wheels and wooden wheels has raised his hand. Speaker 7 (5:32) Uh, yeah, I'd volunteer to go, but I'm too tired. Speaker 5 (5:37) The room erupts into powerful laughter. Speaker 4 (5:40) Oh, ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:42) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 4 (5:43) ha Speaker 5 (5:43) ha Speaker 4 (5:43) ha ha Speaker 5 (5:43) ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 4 (5:44) ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 4 (5:44) ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 1 (5:44) ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:44) ha Speaker 7 (5:45) ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:45) ha Speaker 7 (5:45) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:45) ha Speaker 7 (5:45) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha Speaker 7 (5:46) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha Speaker 7 (5:46) ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha Speaker 7 (5:46) ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha Speaker 7 (5:46) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha Speaker 7 (5:46) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaker 5 (5:46) ha ha Speaker 4 (6:01) Is he made out of tires like the Michelin Man? Speaker 6 (6:03) Is there Speaker 4 (6:03) not a god Speaker 6 (6:03) of tires? Speaker 4 (6:04) No, he is. Speaker 6 (6:05) Like, is a wooden wheel and stuff, like, is there a god of tires? Not yet. Okay. Wow, that's crazy. So it's like a futuristic joke? Uh, yeah. Cool, man. This Speaker 4 (6:15) is all in-world. Speaker 6 (6:16) That didn't make Speaker 4 (6:17) sense to us. There's no such thing as tires yet. A god of metahumor, sit down. It's just that wheels are a different thing than tires. Okay. Speaker 5 (6:27) Listen, we've heard it all before. But this investigation could take multiple days, and our connected objects are simply too important and too powerful to leave unfiltered for that long. But worry not, for I have assembled three of the Providence Plains' most non-essential gods for this task. God of Doors, send them in. And the God of Doors throws open the doors and enter in our three gods. Players, please introduce yourself. Let's start with Griffin. Speaker 4 (7:02) Walking into the chamber is a tall, lanky man with just muscles abound. Aged, I will say, older than a lot of the other gods here and has had some work done, I'll say aesthetically. Unnaturally long blonde hair that's just constantly sort of flowing in the breeze. And with every step, I sort of... bounce i contract my body shrinks and expands i am spira the god of bellows i don't know if we get names i think that was just like a name i picked maybe up here we just rock with like hey i'm i'm the bellows one yeah god of bellows here at work here at work i don't they don't know my actual name is that what you're suggesting no but you go by your title at work you know That's crazy. I mean, you hear that's crazy, right? We don't talk to each other like that. Trevor, Speaker 5 (7:53) are you Speaker 4 (7:53) second guessing it as you're Speaker 5 (7:54) saying it? Yeah, 100%. Because I was trying to find examples of jobs that do that in my head. The president is the only one, really. And Speaker 6 (8:03) even then, people aren't like, hey, president. Yeah. Speaker 7 (8:08) Hey, president. Don't make me so wild, Trevor. That's not even Griffin. Griffin's always like, hey, president of America. Speaker 6 (8:15) Come here. Speaker 6 (8:18) Ah, Speaker 5 (8:18) Spira, Speaker 6 (8:19) god of bellows. And the tapestry shifts before Speaker 4 (8:26) our very eyes. Speaker 5 (8:27) This is the power of actual play. Yep. Ah, bellows. You don't see those that often anymore. Speaker 4 (8:34) Yes, I suppose. With the rise of magic, people have other ways of getting their fires stoked and going. But, you Speaker 6 (8:42) know, some people prefer it. Some people like the old stuff. It Speaker 4 (8:47) tempers the blade better, I feel. You can keep it real steady with a strong application of wind force through a narrow channel. Sure. Yeah, I've Speaker 5 (8:57) always said that. Yeah, definitely. And who follows, Dad, who follows Spira? In walks a tiny, Speaker 7 (9:08) shriveled... Elderly lady. She's kind of hunched over, walks with a cane, comes in, squints through her glasses. She's got these very thick glasses and says, Speaker 7 (9:30) Hello? You all know me. I'm Tintabula. Yeah, God of Bells. How you doing? Doing great. Is this going to take a while? Speaker 5 (9:42) Yes, it could be a few days. Can Speaker 7 (9:45) I have a chair at least? Can I Speaker 5 (9:47) sit? Oh, yeah, not the meeting. The meeting won't take a few days. Speaker 7 (9:50) Yeah, still, though, a chair would be so nice. Sure, God of Speaker 5 (9:54) Chairs. Speaker 2 (9:55) Yeah, I'm on it. Speaker 6 (9:57) He Speaker 5 (9:57) gets a chair. Speaker 4 (9:59) He Speaker 7 (10:00) doesn't Speaker 4 (10:00) create the chairs. He just moves them. Yeah, he's just in charge of them. Speaker 7 (10:04) Oh, Chesterfield. Thank you. Oh, I'm sorry. Got a chairs. Thank you. Anything for you, Tentacular. It got Speaker 6 (10:12) a Speaker 5 (10:12) bounce Speaker 6 (10:13) to the Travis. It just physical objects. Speaker 5 (10:16) It is tangible, non-sentient objects. So like there's a God of plants. There's a God of storms. There's a God, you know, of books, right? This kind of thing. And our third God enters the room. Justin, who do we see? Speaker 6 (10:36) He's. Speaker 6 (10:40) Tall and thin. Messy hair. Kind of like he hasn't really messed with it much lately. Like he's not, he didn't get out much. Blonde. Very bright, light blonde hair. And sort of streaked up glasses. And he said. Damn. Speaker 6 (11:08) I'm Manusha. My name is Manusha. I don't really get out of the shop very much. Hello, I'm Manusha. I'm the god of the marine chronometer. The what? I'm the god of the marine chronometer. Speaker 4 (11:30) I'm getting marine chronometer. The marine Speaker 6 (11:34) chronometer. Speaker 4 (11:40) I don't know what that is. Oh, guys, you had to do this every time. I hate coming up here. Speaker 6 (11:46) Of the marine chronometer, you know. Okay, fine. Humans... have always had it easy detecting where they are in latitude because that is decided on by the equator. But longitude is arbitrary, so they needed a way to tell longitude. Many thousands of human lives were lost because they were unable to tell longitude. And over the course of 40 years, a carpenter, self-taught clockmaker named John Harrison and I worked very hard to create the marine chronometer, which is an incredibly accurate clock. that allows people at sea to tell their precise longitude by keeping extremely accurate time that they then compare with the time it was set to when they left. And that allows them to... Every time you guys make me do this. The marine chronometer, it saved lots of lives. It reinvented the way people navigate. And now I know some people have them in their watches, but at first it was really big and it took us a really long time. Speaker 4 (12:53) Okay, yeah. That really, I feel like, ate up all the energy in the room. That felt like time traveled to me. I didn't want to come up. I don't like to come up here. Speaker 7 (13:04) Honey, listen, I'm sure your mother's very proud. I thought that was very well put. Okay, if we could get Speaker 5 (13:12) back on track, ironically, time is of the essence here. Um, you three, oh, three of our most trusted gods. Oh, you three have been specially selected for this mission. Speaker 4 (13:30) Oh, Speaker 5 (13:31) yes, Speaker 4 (13:31) and we all trust... You've got to stop groaning. Why? It sounds facetious, the amount of groaning that you're doing. It feels honestly condescending. No, this is my sincere groan. It feels to me like you don't really have a great reason for why the three of us were chosen. And so in lieu of that explanation, we're just getting a lot of Tim Allen-esque sort of home improvement stinger-ass grunts. Because of your special skills? Speaker 5 (14:01) Yeah? Listen. In the mortal plane, someone is putting together a dark ritual. Speaker 7 (14:09) Oh, yes, yes. Speaker 6 (14:11) Oh, Speaker 5 (14:12) I know. Speaker 7 (14:12) Oh, Speaker 5 (14:13) tell me about it. Harumph, harumph, harumph. Speaker 7 (14:16) Harumph, harumph. Speaker 5 (14:17) And according to the God of Scouting reports, this ritual we're calling the anti-God. Speaker 5 (14:31) The reports are that this ritual would sever the connection between the gods of the Providence plane and the objects of the mortal plane, which obviously would be disastrous for both. Speaker 7 (14:47) Hmm. Because then those things would just be things. Well, Speaker 5 (14:53) no, then they would Speaker 7 (14:54) behave in Speaker 5 (14:55) unpredictable and erratic ways outside of the small scope that we expect these objects to act. Speaker 7 (15:03) Anarchy! We can't have that. Speaker 4 (15:06) And we would also starve to death. That is obviously the bigger concern. But I, oof, it is a nightmare, truly, to think of what the world would be like without functional marine chronometers. Was that it? Speaker 7 (15:22) It would be very bad. I know Speaker 4 (15:24) you're trying to hurt my feelings, but it would be very bad. Sailors rolling up to shore like, is it 638? And they're like, no, man, it's 615. Can you Speaker 6 (15:35) imagine? Speaker 4 (15:36) It's the Speaker 6 (15:37) placement. See, they'll run into the shore because they don't know what time it is. It's a map that's a clock. It's a very good clock. Yes, yes, it's just a very good clock, but I do need to watch over them. I have to watch them, so I can't. So do you have jurisdiction over any other clocks or is it just boat clocks? There are different clocks on boats to tell the time. This is just to tell where you are. So you're not Speaker 4 (16:00) even the god of all boat clocks. You're a god of all specific type of clocks for boats. Speaker 5 (16:05) It's not a Speaker 4 (16:05) clock. Speaker 6 (16:06) It's a chronometer. It measures time. It's a map. We are loving the Speaker 5 (16:09) rapport, but remember the starvation thing and the stuff happening around it. I Speaker 6 (16:15) can't go. Somebody's got to watch chronometers. Yeah, we got the god of clocks Speaker 5 (16:21) to do that Speaker 6 (16:21) for you. Jared! Speaker 5 (16:24) Yeah, Speaker