Helicopter Maintenance
Straight Forward Farming
In this episode of the Straight Forward Farming Podcast, hosts Tony Reid and Nick McCormick welcome their wives back for a rare joint appearance after years of retirement from
Key takeaways
- The wives' return to podcasting after years of absence highlights the enduring humor and camaraderie within the farming community.
- Summer heat and pest issues like hoverflies are major distractions, even affecting farm maintenance schedules.
Main topics
- Summer heat and its impact on farm operations
- Maintenance routines during school breaks
Notable quotes
'You're just going to have to deal with it because I'm not going to sit here and melt.'
'I want to see Carolyn try to helicopter 20,000 people. Yeah, she'll try.'
Conclusion
This episode blends seasonal reflections, humor, and anticipation for upcoming events, showcasing the
Transcript preview
Speaker 2 (0:30) Hello, folks. Welcome back to the Straight Forward Farming Podcast. I'm your host, Tony Reid, alongside Nick McCormick, as always. We're back. We're back on a very hot evening. You guys might hear fans and shit in the background, but guess what? You're just going to have to deal with it because I'm not going to sit here and melt. Yeah, it's warm. If you don't like it, change the channel. Nobody here is going to miss you. That's just how it is. Speaker 2 (0:51) We have special Speaker 1 (0:51) guests. Speaker 2 (0:52) Yeah, we do have two special guests in the house. Drug them out of retirement. Yeah. Our lovely wives. This is the first podcast they've done in five, six years. Speaker 1 (1:02) I think of this decade. Speaker 2 (1:03) It is. I think so. Yeah. A Speaker 4 (1:05) year. Yep. A year-ish. Yeah, Speaker 2 (1:06) so how is you guys' podcast going? Speaker 4 (1:08) It's going really good. Yeah, I'll bet it is. I appreciate that. No Speaker 2 (1:10) negative comments. Yeah. It's Speaker 4 (1:12) hardly any Speaker 1 (1:12) work at all. Speaker 4 (1:13) Yeah. Truly. Speaker 1 (1:15) Sponsored by the U.S. government. Yeah. Yeah, you guys are as fast as the Postal Service. Speaker 4 (1:21) We're busy. I know. Speaker 1 (1:23) We're busy. Speaker 4 (1:23) I Speaker 1 (1:23) know. Yep. We Speaker 4 (1:25) have to run the ship while you guys get to Speaker 1 (1:28) drink. You Speaker 2 (1:29) guys Speaker 1 (1:29) can go so fast. Speaker 2 (1:30) Yeah. Yeah, they are a lot Speaker 1 (1:32) quicker. Speaker 2 (1:32) And you're Speaker 4 (1:33) breaking that out right at the start of the evening. Yeah, Speaker 2 (1:36) pretty much. Yep. So, yeah, it's hotter than balls here in our shop because I'm too tight to buy air conditioning. So we are accepting donations for that. But summer's about over, so. What's the point now? Speaker 4 (1:50) So it's set up for next year. Yeah, exactly. Speaker 1 (1:53) Yeah, Speaker 2 (1:53) I Speaker 1 (1:53) suppose. Speaker 2 (1:54) So we've got a big week coming up this week, heading to Bowling Green, Ohio, to the big tractor pull. Yeah. That'll be a pretty good time. I don't know. I haven't confirmed it, but I've heard through my channels. I think Charlie Trucker is staying with us, and I believe Iron Mike Sharp. That Speaker 1 (2:09) shouldn't turn into a train wreck at all. It shouldn't, Speaker 2 (2:11) no. And Denny and Liv. So, yeah, and Popcorn Farmer Brian and Mo and Red Power Stew. I don't know who all is going to be there. Speaker 4 (2:17) I'm coming this year for the first time. Speaker 2 (2:19) Yeah, I'm bringing my wife. I'm Speaker 1 (2:22) excited Speaker 4 (2:22) and Speaker 1 (2:23) nervous. That'll cut down on the medevac calls out there. Yeah, it will. At least we'll have Speaker 2 (2:27) a Speaker 1 (2:27) helicopter. I want to see Carolyn try to helicopter 20,000 people. Yeah, she'll try. Hey, guess Speaker 4 (2:32) what? You're making poor choices. I will get it done. You may need to take a Speaker 1 (2:36) loudspeaker. I'm surprised she ain't going to bring cookies for everybody. Yeah, no doubt. Speaker 4 (2:41) That is an idea, Tony. That is an idea. Yeah. Speaker 1 (2:45) You had too many beers. Here, have a cookie. Yeah. Beer and sweets go excellent together. You Speaker 4 (2:50) guys can knock me all you want, but when you get drunk and I bring out the food, guess who's excited about it? Speaker 3 (2:58) Everybody. Speaker 2 (3:00) Yeah, you're not wrong. That's true. Yep. That's true. So the kids are back in school. I don't know if that's good Speaker 1 (3:07) or bad. Yeah, it's too early. What? No, it's good. Speaker 3 (3:10) It's good. It was fine. It's good. Speaker 1 (3:12) It's good. They stole some summer from them. They should have another week or two. Well, this way they can maintain the Speaker 2 (3:17) helicopters now the kids ain't here as much. Speaker 1 (3:19) That's true. Get them in the shop. Get them some maintenance runs. Yeah. Absolutely. It's been a long, hot summer. Yep. Yeah. Speaker 4 (3:28) This summer did feel exceptionally short, though, I feel like. I feel like July is when it finally felt like summer. And then that was over. Speaker 2 (3:37) Well, for me, it's because I literally planted in March. I planted in April. I planted in May. And I planted in June. Yeah. Yeah. Speaker 4 (3:43) And the weather really like it wasn't super hot until into June. Yeah. Speaker 1 (3:49) Nope. Then it got hot, hotter than I needed to be like it is today. I was Speaker 4 (3:54) saying now it's stupid hot and we should not be in school. It should be summer. I Speaker 1 (3:59) almost shut the air off this morning while it was raining and I'm like, you know. I'm not going to. It's Friday. I'm not sweating. I'm going to leave it on. That's a terrible Speaker 4 (4:07) idea. Speaker 1 (4:07) And Speaker 4 (4:07) then Speaker 1 (4:07) I come back from lunch and it was like 112 outside. And I'm like, yeah, glad I left that on. Good choice. Yeah. Speaker 4 (4:12) Never shut the air off after rain. Speaker 1 (4:15) I shut it off about three o'clock and I'm like, that was stupid. I should just let it run until five. Speaker 2 (4:19) But Speaker 1 (4:20) whatever. Yep. Now if we can just get rid of the damn hoverflies. Yes. Those things are everywhere. They Speaker 2 (4:26) claim they don't hurt anything, but Speaker 1 (4:27) they annoy the piss out of me, and that's my main concern. Speaker 2 (4:29) It's bad enough to be standing there in the sun just drenched in sweat, then you got these things just clouding over you. Which is apparently Speaker 1 (4:34) what they like. Yeah, I guess. Which is why they're big fans of me, because I sweat a lot. Do you guys Speaker 4 (4:39) remember that show, Naked and Afraid? Speaker 1 (4:41) Yes. Speaker 4 (4:42) Yes, and like they would be in these tropical climates and have all these whatever. After one day, two hours outside with the sweat bees. cornflakes, whatever you call them, I was like, I'd never make it. Ever. I'd completely lose my mind. I would tap out immediately. Speaker 2 (4:56) I'm not looking to walk through the African savannah naked, personally. Speaker 4 (5:01) Well, neither am Speaker 2 (5:02) I, but Speaker 3 (5:02) I'm just saying. Not on your bucket list. Speaker 2 (5:04) No, I don't think. I Speaker 3 (5:06) mean, Speaker 2 (5:07) I guess I should knock it until I try it, but Speaker 1 (5:08) I'm just not. I always think the same thing about Vietnam movies, though. I'm like, it's not the gunfire that would bother me as much as the humidity. Yeah. The leeches, all the vermin. I would have got Speaker 2 (5:17) sniped immediately in Vietnam, swatting mosquitoes and everything else. Absolutely. Totally Speaker 1 (5:22) give away my position. Bathe me in Agent Orange, whatever it takes to keep it off. Which Speaker 2 (5:27) actually shows even more heroic how, like, Carlos Hathcock and these guys, you can crawl through a swamp for Speaker 1 (5:32) three miles. Yeah. None of that affects you. I can't make a car ride over here from my house if there's a fly in the car. Yeah, Speaker 2 (5:38) exactly. Speaker 1 (5:39) I'm about to knock the windows out. Yeah. Yep. Couldn't pull it off. Speaker 2 (5:44) Nope. No, I don't know. Which, speaking of that, so speaking like Vietnam and this and that, I was thinking about this the other day. Have we ever fought a war in South America? Ever? Like we've fought everywhere else in the world. We've been Europe, Russia, Africa. We've never really messed with South America. Speaker 3 (6:02) Why Speaker 2 (6:02) is that? Speaker 3 (6:03) That's a good point. I don't know that we have. Not one that we admit to. Speaker 2 (6:07) Well, I mean, yeah, you had the whole. If you've ever seen the movie, is it American Made or Made in America with Tom Cruise and the whole Noriega? Yeah. Speaker 3 (6:14) That Speaker 2 (6:14) was just little skirmishes. Yeah. I don't know. Speaker 1 (6:19) We just send the occasional Special Forces team down there to secure a pipeline or two. Sure. Yeah. Yep, Speaker 2 (6:25) exactly. Speaker 1 (6:25) Whatever it takes. Speaker 2 (6:26) Yep. Speaker 1 (6:28) Yeah. No, I don't think we have no large-scale deal anyway. So what do you guys want to talk about? I see where Nambia needs some freedom. Nambia? Yeah. Interesting. Didn't they just find a bunch of oil there? An unbelievable amount of oil. They're Speaker 2 (6:42) going Speaker 1 (6:42) to need some freedom. Yeah, they're going to need some freedom. They're going to need some democracy here pretty soon. We'll Speaker 2 (6:46) send the TSA. I see you've got a little freedom on your hands. You're going to have to wipe that off. Yeah. Better get on that. Yep. So I've started watching this guy on YouTube called Sabbatical. And the guy must speak every language under the sun. So he just travels all over the world. And he goes to all these shithole places like in Uganda, these little bitty villages that are... just out of control. Like, goes all over the world. It's actually really cool to see the places that he goes. Speaker 4 (7:11) When you said that, I thought you were going to talk about the guy that does the train riding. No. Speaker 2 (7:16) So I'm totally obsessed, totally obsessed with hopping trains. Like, I'm going to hop a train and go somewhere. I don't know where. No, he is not. So every night I watch this. Veto. She freaks out. Speaker 3 (7:25) Like Amtrak? No, no. God, no. Speaker 2 (7:27) No, I actually want to get to where I'm going. I'm going to take a freight train. Speaker 3 (7:29) Like hobo style. Yeah, hobo style. Speaker 2 (7:31) Yep. Speaker 3 (7:31) Okay. Speaker 2 (7:32) Yep. So today, I had to go to Dr. to get some blood drawn for my thyroid. Pouring down rain. So I come out of the doctor's office and I see this Mexican guy walking with a backpack. In the pouring down rain, I'm like, hell, I'm always packing. You know, stay strapped or get clapped as George Washington said. So I randomly pick up hitchhikers because I think it's fun. Because I just do. I'm like, I'm carrying. It's going to be fine. So I pick this guy up and I take him to the truck stop where he's going to go. Super nice guy. Spoke good English. He didn't really give many details. I don't know. I probably helped some bank robber or serial killer. He was Speaker 4 (8:05) probably a trafficker. Could have been. Speaker 2 (8:07) Yeah, could have been. But anyway, I was telling her and another friend of ours about it, and of course they were freaking out. I'm like, well, I'm paying it forward for when I hop a train because I'm about to hitchhike between train yards when I get hung up somewhere. So that's all I was doing was paying it forward. There Speaker 1 (8:19) you Speaker 2 (8:19) go. So I can hitchhike with Speaker 1 (8:20) them. If you remember when we were in high school, a kid not too many towns over our age did that. Yes, he did. But he didn't mean to go as far as he did. No, he meant to ride a mile or two and then end up in Terre Haute if I remember right. Indianapolis, I think. Yeah, I might have been in it. Yep. Speaker 2 (8:32) I think they was out drinking one night, and there was just one of them random sightings out in the country, and the train was stopped there. And I think when they pulled up there, it was just starting to take off, so it was just barely creeping. So he jumped on and was just going to literally ride to the next Speaker 1 (8:44) intersection or whatever. Speaker 2 (8:46) Yeah, because, you know, of course, when you're drinking, you're making poor decisions. Well, once he gets on, the train just starts going faster, too fast to jump off. Oh, my gosh. He's committed at this point. His friends watch him ride off into the sunset. This is for cell phones or anything. Yeah. Speaker 2 (9:01) Yeah, he got to Indianapolis, had to call his mom and dad and explain what happened. Speaker 4 (9:04) Oh, my gosh. He had to call his mom and dad. What Speaker 2 (9:06) else? Speaker 1 (9:07) This was like 1130 at night. His friends. Oh, they probably went, oh, Speaker 2 (9:10) they Speaker 1 (9:10) didn't Speaker 2 (9:11) have Speaker 1 (9:11) cell phones. It Speaker 4 (9:11) was past Speaker 3 (9:12) curfew. Yeah. Speaker 1 (9:14) Gosh. Yep. Speaker 3 (9:16) Now all I can think of is that Roger Miller song, King of the Road, when you're talking about jumping trains. Speaker 2 (9:22) Yeah. Yeah. I Speaker 3 (9:23) think it's a terrible Speaker 2 (9:24) idea. Terrible idea. I'm going to do it once. Just once. You've got to live a little. You've got a helicopter. You can come pick me up. I don't know. So what do you guys want to talk about? Nobody's giving me Speaker 1 (9:40) any good topics here. Speaker 2 (9:40) I don't know. What Speaker 4 (9:41) do Speaker 2 (9:41) you want Speaker 4 (9:41) to talk about? Speaker 2 (9:41) I'm carrying this whole conversation. I need a little help here. Are you? Okay. I don't know. We're Speaker 1 (9:45) really carrying the load here, Carolyn. Come on. Jump on. Yeah. What do you want to do, Carol? What's on your bucket list besides picking Tony up from his train hopping? Speaker 4 (9:52) Yeah. Not doing that. I don't know. I want to travel a whole bunch more. That's my bucket listing, which is your bucket listing. That's what Speaker 2 (10:00) I'm trying to do, but you're shutting me down. Speaker 4 (10:02) We can travel in a safe environment. Speaker 2 (10:05) But it ain't as fun. Speaker 4 (10:07) How do you know? You've never done it yet. Speaker 2 (10:09) But it looks fun. But Speaker 4 (10:10) what if you try it and it's absolutely terrible? Well, Speaker 2 (10:13) then I'll just get off at Indianapolis and call my mom and dad. Speaker 4 (10:17) No, you'll call me. Speaker 4 (10:20) You'll call me and I'll be like, I told you this was a bad idea. I'm on my way. Speaker 2 (10:25) Yeah, I'm not riding Amtrak. I mean, Speaker 1 (10:27) it's not like the postal service. I actually want to get to where I'm going in a timely fashion. I only rode the Amtrak one time in my life and they'll never talk me into it again. It was 1986. I remember that because the Bears had just won the Super Bowl. Were you delivering weights to Heston, Kansas Speaker 2 (10:41) again? I didn't know Speaker 1 (10:42) if you guys packed them all on the Amtrak. This vacation was almost equally as fun. We went to Chicago on the Amtrak, and they overbooked it, so I got to sit on the floor. Ah, nice. Super handy. Yeah. Because Speaker 2 (10:55) apparently they Speaker 1 (10:55) couldn't count how many tickets versus how many seats they had. Speaker 2 (10:57) Yeah, that's a pretty tall task. Now, Speaker 1 (10:59) one guy with a briefcase did have four seats that he conveniently took up by himself. But that was nice. Yep. But I got to sit on the floor. Speaker 2 (11:06) Well, I know when Henry was just a little bitty shit, he was into trains. So for his birthday, we got on in Effingham and rode to Champaign, I think it was. Yeah, it was, because you and Michelle picked us up. So we rode to Champaign, which is an hour north. And that track was the roughest track. It's like, I thought we were going to derail. I mean, I've never seen anything like it. It was the roughest track I've ever been on in my life. It was terrible. Speaker 4 (11:27) But wasn't we were going to take him for his birthday one year, and the train actually derailed, and so we had to cancel that, and we took the kids sledding instead. Speaker 2 (11:35) Yeah, but then we ended up riding it. But we Speaker 4 (11:36) ended up doing it. Okay. Yeah, Speaker 2 (11:37) because it was him and I think Parker, maybe? Speaker 4 (11:39) Yeah, probably. Speaker 2 (11:40) Yeah, but yeah. I think it was the same year we had to reschedule. The thing literally derailed. I know. Well, good thing you weren't on that one. Speaker 1 (11:47) Yeah. Speaker 3 (11:47) Last time I took Amtrak was Chicago to Mattoon. And I ended up picking up not a hitchhiker, but I did pick up someone and take them home. Speaker 2 (11:57) See? He sees them. So you're just paying it forward. Speaker 3 (12:00) I was coming home from Chicago. Colby was just a baby. Nick was home with her. I'd been up there for workshop, work, whatever. And there were three guys. that had been drinking and started giving me a hard time on the train. And so I called Nick or texted him or whatever. And I was like, hey, this is what's going on. It was like midnight when I was getting into Mattoon, super late, 11 o'clock, something like that. And I was like, if these guys are getting off in Mattoon, I'm not getting off there. I'll just keep on to Effingham and you're going to have to come pick me up in Effingham. And because my car was at Mattoon. He's like, okay. And so there was an Amish boy in the seat in front of me. I say boy, somewhere in the age of like 17 to 24. I mean, Speaker 2 (12:45) they have beards when they're five. So it's a wide range. Speaker 3 (12:48) Exactly, exactly. And so, you know, he saw everything that was going on. As we get close to Mattoon, I tap him on the shoulder and I say, hey, are you getting off in Mattoon? Knowing he was probably going to Arthur, you know. And he's like, yeah. And I'm like, do you mind walking me to my car? And he's like, yeah. Oh, that's fine. I'll walk you to your car. So he walks me to my car. I get going and everything. I head out of the parking lot to head home. And here's the Amish boy at midnight riding his bike. I, you know, and I'm like, crap. So I pull over and I say, hey, you want a ride? I'll give you a ride. And he's like, are you sure? And I'm like, yeah. So he takes the wheels off. Speaker 2 (13:28) bike. This is where the wheels come off of this story. How fast Speaker 3 (13:32) did he do it? Pretty darn fast. He takes the wheels off of his bike and puts his bike in the trunk of my car and gets in and so I text Nick and I'm like, it's going to be a little late taking an Amish boy home. Speaker 1 (13:49) Yeah, I'm like, good. She's getting better. I'm like, well, I'm never going to see her again. Yeah, exactly. Single dad. Speaker 3 (13:56) Bye, Kelly. See you later. So I took the guy home and he's like, can we stop just a mile or two from my... And I'm like, absolutely. You know, I wouldn't want you to get caught in some way, shape, or form. Questionable behavior. So, yeah. So, he got out, got his bike out, put the tires on, and rode on Speaker 4 (14:15) home. Speaker 3 (14:15) Although, I feel like if I was going to pick up a Speaker 4 (14:17) hitchhiker, an Amish person would be top of my list of someone to pick up. Like, they're not going to harm me. Speaker 2 (14:23) I mean, Amish clearly don't tell time because if they knew that the train was supposed to get to Mattoon at 10 p.m. and then he's on their doorstep at 10.15, it's like, damn, you pedaled your ass off, son. Yeah. No doubt. Speaker 3 (14:35) And it's not like you could say it got in early because that's not happening. Yeah, not on Amtrak, right? Yeah. So that was the last time I took Amtrak. I have never rode the Amtrak, ever. It's not that bad. I did it a lot in my 20s. When I worked for Deere in the Quad Cities, there was Amtrak from Galesburg to Kansas City, and there was only one stop. So it was like a three-hour. And so whenever I had meetings in Kansas City, which was a lot, I would drive down to Galesburg and take that. and then take a cab to my hotel and then somebody from work would pick me up in the morning and take me to the office. I took that a lot versus driving the six or seven hours. Speaker 2 (15:13) Yeah, makes sense. Speaker 4 (15:14) Did you hear what she said, Nick? Speaker 2 (15:16) The six or Speaker 4 (15:17) seven hours? Oh, gosh. Speaker 2 (15:19) Absolutely. I don't even know what that means. Speaker 3 (15:22) Nobody does. Nobody does. It doesn't mean anything. Speaker 4 (15:26) It's just a made-up thing that is suddenly cool now. Speaker 1 (15:32) Yeah, I'm out on the Amtrak. Yeah, I'm good there. Speaker 2 (15:36) I mean, see, at least if you hop a freight train, you don't have people heckling you. I mean, I don't think there's other people riding in the coal wagon or anything like that. Speaker 1 (15:42) Well, Speaker 2 (15:42) there Speaker 1 (15:42) could be. Have you seen 1923? No, I haven't. Speaker 2 (15:45) I Speaker 1 (15:45) barely got to sleep in that train. Really? Yeah. Speaker 2 (15:48) No, I'm kind of out on the Taylor Sheridan stuff. I know. Me neither. Well, you've seen Speaker 1 (15:52) Harley Davidson and the Marble Man. They ride a Speaker 2 (15:54) train for a while. They did? Yeah. Speaker 1 (15:58) For a little bit. Don Johnson jumps out. Harley feels bad. He stays on, I think, but then eventually meets up with him. He might have jumped out down the road a little ways, but yeah. Are you sure? I'm positive. They were at a train for a while. Yes, absolutely. Speaker 1 (16:15) Absolutely. Interesting. Speaker 4 (16:16) Okay, so my question is, what is your obsession with riding a train? Speaker 2 (16:22) I Speaker 3 (16:22) don't know. Speaker 2 (16:22) To me, it just looks... Speaker 4 (16:23) Because it's illegal? Because you want to hop on and be out in all the elements? Speaker 2 (16:29) It's just something that looks fun and harmless, and you can just say you've done it. Like, why does somebody get a tattoo? Like, you know what I'm saying? Speaker 4 (16:40) No. No, I don't. Speaker 4 (16:43) Like you get a tattoo because you want something meaningful or whatever. Speaker 2 (16:48) That's what I'm saying. It enriches your life. So hopping a train is meaningful. It's because not a lot of people would say they've done that, right? Speaker 3 (16:54) Well, Sheldon, what's your obsession with trains? Speaker 2 (16:58) I don't know. And that's funny because I'm not a big train guy. Like I think trains are neat in their own way, but I'm not obsessed with trains. Like when the big boy was running around, I wouldn't Speaker 1 (17:06) have Speaker 2 (17:06) drove a mile to see it. It doesn't interest me. Speaker 4 (17:10) I don't know. Why are Speaker 1 (17:11) you guys pinning this all on Speaker 2 (17:12) me? Because Speaker 4 (17:13) it's your thing. The railroads are Speaker 1 (17:15) a very integral part of this country, especially this area. Exactly. This was railroad land at one time. Yep. I don't know. Speaker 4 (17:22) I'm just too worried about everything. I can totally see that. Speaker 1 (17:27) Yeah. Carolyn will take the train as long as SEAL Team 6 rides with her. Yeah. Then she'll get on. Speaker 4 (17:34) Actually, like, if Tony is with me, I'm totally fine doing whatever. He invited you Speaker 2 (17:38) to Speaker 1 (17:38) hop a train with him Speaker 2 (17:39) twice now, and Speaker 1 (17:40) you won't do it. Speaker 2 (17:41) And odds are, if I get caught, there's a 99 % chance the guys driving the train are going to know me. It's Speaker 1 (17:47) just Speaker 2 (17:47) right up front. Speaker 4 (17:48) Yeah. Oh, yeah, we watch your TikToks. Exactly. Speaker 1 (17:52) Ma'am, we don't Speaker 2 (17:53) know Speaker 1 (17:53) you. Stay back in the freight car. Yeah, exactly. Speaker 4 (17:56) No, they're going to arrest me and send me to jail for 500 years. That's Speaker 2 (18:01) fine. Speaker 4 (18:02) And that's a brand new experience, too. Yeah. I am not looking to have that experience ever, ever. Fun Speaker 1 (18:11) hater. Speaker 4 (18:12) Uh-huh. No, that being said, I do always tell Tony, I was like, as long as you're with me, I'm like, oh, we can do anything. It's fine, because Tony will help take care of it. But if I'm on my own, I got things lined out, I know what's going to happen, because I'm prepared. Speaker 2 (18:28) So if you're with me and I decide to pick up a random hitchhiker, are you cool with it? Yeah. You are? Because Speaker 4 (18:32) I know you'll take care of me. Speaker 2 (18:33) You'll bitch the entire time as I'm pulling up to him, and then you'll be real nice and polite. Speaker 4 (18:37) No, I'll be like, oh my gosh, I think this is a terrible idea, but if you think it's okay, we'll go ahead and do it. And then they'll get in and I'll be like, hi, how are you? And then I will get their entire life story. I will give them snacks. I will give them money. We'll probably exchange numbers. It's like I told you guys today. I'll be best friends. Speaker 2 (18:52) I have a firearm. He needs a ride. It's a win-win. I think it's fine. Speaker 1 (18:58) Yeah. Seems like it worked out. He's here. It's fine. That's Speaker 2 (19:02) twice Speaker 1 (19:02) now I've done it. Speaker 4 (19:04) uh was it from shelbyville last time you did it yeah Speaker 2 (19:07) last time i drove that guy like 25 miles did you text me it was colder than that day yeah was that in the buick no i was in that blue truck okay yeah because Speaker 4 (19:14) you text me and you're like hey i picked up a hitchhiker i've got my gun now Speaker 2 (19:18) the guy today i was like Speaker 4 (19:19) okay keep me posted the Speaker 2 (19:21) guy today looked like normal like he had a nice quote like i'm gonna say nice like he wasn't dressed in rags is what i'm getting at But the guy I picked up that day, he was a little rough looking. And I just told him as soon as I pulled up there. And I better not say it on the podcast. But I just made it crystal clear that there would be no monkey business in the truck. And it was fine. It worked out. Speaker 4 (19:42) So did this guy tell you anything today, like where he was going, what he was doing? No. Speaker 2 (19:47) He'd been hopping trains. I don't want to get subpoenaed, of course. I don't ask questions. But I Speaker 4 (19:52) also don't ask questions, and I can go into a random gas station and... That's why Speaker 2 (19:57) I don't go to town with you. They will tell Speaker 4 (19:58) me their entire life story. It's like literally Speaker 2 (20:01) traveling with fucking Ann Landers here. It's like... I don't know what... Most of the listeners probably don't know who that is, but... Yeah. Speaker 4 (20:08) Literally... If I don't do self-checkout, I promise you I will know this entire person's life story. I'm going to be commiserating with them about something, giving them life advice. The key is to look Speaker 1 (20:20) unapproachable and annoyed, and Speaker 2 (20:22) then they don't speak to you. Speaker 4 (20:24) I can't do that. Based Speaker 2 (20:25) on your judgment, just look like a hitchhiker. Nobody will talk to you. Speaker 2 (20:29) Unless you're Amish. Amish hitchhikers, they're good. That's right, Speaker 3 (20:32) yeah. They're safe. They're safe above the line. I feel like they're safe. So now all Speaker 2 (20:35) of Speaker 3 (20:35) our Speaker 1 (20:35) listeners think, well. After Speaker 2 (20:37) you pick up Speaker 1 (20:37) a pacifist to defend you. Yeah, exactly. Should work out just fine. So for all of our listeners out there, if you're going to do something shady, just dress Amish and everybody's going to think you're honest. Yeah. Speaker 2 (20:46) Some of that good old Amish-made furniture. Speaker 1 (20:50) Golden oak it is. Speaker 2 (20:51) Yep. Speaker 1 (20:54) Oh. So now we got awkward silence. Speaker 2 (20:56) Yeah. What are we going to do? We'll fill it, Tony. I'm trying. Speaker 1 (21:01) Got a nice rain today. We Speaker 4 (21:02) did. Got Speaker 1 (21:03) an inch of rain Speaker 4 (21:03) today. Speaker 2 (21:03) Yeah. Was glad to see that. Yeah. Speaker 4 (21:05) Finally. Yep. Speaker 2 (21:06) Oh, there's Bob's war wagon. The old Buick. Yeah. So I need the listeners to explain this to me. And I give Bob shit about this all the time. So that Buick that he's driving now is my old tan one from TikTok. I gave $300 for that car. Literally drove it all over the United States. Everywhere. So he trashes my original red Buick because that was his by then. Tears the transmission out of it, whatever. So I just give him this one. That's one because her grandpa gave me the Red Ranger. So I'm like, well, ain't no dollar figure to me either way. So you just take that. I'll take this. Fine. So he has this Buick now for. He hadn't had it a month and a half. He ripped the exhaust off, the transmission slipped, and it looks like somebody took a golf club and just beat the living piss out of the door. I'm like, what do you do? The whole purpose of getting these junk cars and driving them is to save money. But when you've got to get a new one every three months because you've tore it up, you're not saving nothing. Speaker 4 (21:58) So he's 17. Do you not remember what you did when you were 17? Speaker 1 (22:03) I was with Tony when he was 17 and he did not destroy his vehicle. Exactly. Nick and I was always smart Speaker 2 (22:07) enough to Speaker 1 (22:07) ride with the people who would destroy their vehicle. Speaker 2 (22:10) Unfortunately, you Speaker 4 (22:10) have a son who's willing to destroy his Speaker 2 (22:12) vehicle. Speaker 4 (22:12) He's a lot like Speaker 2 (22:13) my brother. Speaker 4 (22:14) Exactly. Speaker 2 (22:15) And I'm not bitching. It's Henry's car. He can do whatever he wants. I don't care. It's a $300 car. I don't know how you ripped the exhaust clear Speaker 1 (22:22) off and everything else when I drove this thing all over the U.S. In our defense, the guys we were riding with had the money to fix their shit. They did, yeah. They were way older than us. And we got to see a lot of cool shit get tore up. Well, Speaker 4 (22:31) Henry has the money to fix it, but he just doesn't want to. Well, this was nice Speaker 1 (22:35) stuff that they were destroying. Yeah, these were new vehicles. Yeah. Speaker 4 (22:37) Yep. It's a hard pass. Speaker 2 (22:39) Every person we ran around with wrecked each other's vehicles. Like, they never wrecked their, well, I mean, they wrecked their own some, too, but it was always somebody was driving the other one's vehicle. But the guy who owned it was riding with them. Like, he was in the passenger seat. Speaker 1 (22:50) Yeah, which never made any sense to me. But, yeah, it happened a lot. Yep. Not when Tony and I were riding. We were always fine. Yep. Sure. It's true. Speaker 4 (22:58) Actually, I 100 % see that. Speaker 1 (23:00) We were always Speaker 2 (23:00) the janitors. Had to come in and Speaker 1 (23:01) sweep up the pieces. Yep, absolutely. Speaker 4 (23:03) But you guys probably got the pot stirring. No. And you're like, hey, I think you could ramp that. You should probably try that. Maybe. We never talked to anybody. And Speaker 1 (23:14) then Speaker 4 (23:14) you sat back there and just watched. Oh, no, we'll come help you out. I know how you two play. We need to Speaker 2 (23:21) get my brother on a podcast. I've never really talked about my family on social media, so I've got two older brothers. I'm the youngest. So my middle brother, this guy, when it comes to vehicles, it's unbelievable. He bought a brand-new four-wheel-drive Chevy truck, I'm going to guess in 01 or 02. I don't know what year it was. Something like that. That vintage, roughly. Bought a brand-new four-wheel-drive. First four-wheel-drive he ever had. The first day he got it, they were screwing around in the river, and he broke through the ice. He had water clear up to the seats inside the truck. Hell, Speaker 1 (23:50) it wasn't no big deal. But Speaker 2 (23:50) he was always one of those that he would always get by. Never had any trouble. He would beat the living piss out of it, like, cosmetically, but, like, he never. Yeah, no Speaker 1 (23:59) major repairs. And then the truck before that, he bought new, and he changed the oil, was it once or twice in Speaker 2 (24:04) 200 and some thousand abusive, abusive miles. Everybody Speaker 4 (24:09) gave me crap about my van, the old van. And here he was with one oil change under his belt. Speaker 2 (24:16) He always says, you guys are throwing your money away changing oil. You ain't got to Speaker 1 (24:19) do that. In his defense, this truck made way less noises inside than your van did. Speaker 4 (24:24) My van had character, okay? It did have character. She was a person. Speaker 1 (24:28) That's true. She was Speaker 4 (24:30) a whole personality. Speaker 1 (24:31) Yours was always just random stuff that happened to it. This was intentional destruction that was designed to be fun. Mine was, Speaker 4 (24:38) I was going to get groceries, and all of a sudden this happened, and I was like, I did nothing wrong. Speaker 2 (24:42) Like, we would be four-wheeler riding, quarterback in the middle of nowhere, and somebody gets something stuck, well, I'll just go get my truck, and I mean, he would just blaze an entire new trail through the woods, hitting trees, I mean, just destroyed this thing. Speaker 1 (24:52) We'd have a fleet of four-wheel drive trucks, busting drifts or whatever. Ah, I can get through that in my two-wheel drive. He actually could go further with his two-wheel drive than he ever could with his first four-wheel drive. Oh, 100%. Yeah. Speaker 4 (25:02) He Speaker 1 (25:03) knew what he was doing. Wheel speed was the Speaker 2 (25:04) key, is what he told me. Speaker 1 (25:06) And I witnessed it several times, and he did have plenty of wheel speed. Speaker 2 (25:09) Yep. I think that was a truck. He smoked the tires until they blew, and then when they come apart, it tore the whole fender off. Yeah, Speaker 1 (25:16) it Speaker 2 (25:16) just tore the bejesus out of the side of the truck. And then that new one that he bought that he fell through the river, a friend of ours was... deer hunting and they knew roughly where his stand was it's kind of close to the road so him another guy went out right in front of his deer stand on the road and smoked the tires there and didn't drive what an eighth of a mile in the rear end but he just laughs he don't care didn't bother yeah he can tell you some stories yeah he Speaker 4 (25:44) does have some good ones yes Speaker 2 (25:45) but yeah i never tore any vehicles up i mean i Speaker 1 (25:48) never really did either Speaker 4 (25:50) Well, that's good. Good job, boys. Good job. Speaker 1 (25:53) I love to smoke the tires off in a vehicle. I'll be the first one to tell you that, and that's why I don't buy vehicles that'll do it. Speaker 1 (25:59) If I had a five-speed Mustang sitting here, I guarantee I wouldn't be on this podcast right now. I'd be out there smoking the tires off. Henry and I would be hot lapping this place. Speaker 4 (26:06) I did see the funniest TikTok the other day, and it was this guy. And he was like, oh, half mile from his house, whatever. And he was complaining about he could tell somebody. And he's like, do it in front of my house. Nobody will do it with me. And I was like, yeah, that's. Did Speaker 1 (26:22) you notice our neighbor reposted that? No. I think on purpose, because the black marks were like 200 foot past his house. I think he was requesting they be right in front of his house. No, Speaker 4 (26:32) I did not see that. Nice. Speaker 1 (26:34) Yeah. Speaker 4 (26:35) So that's what you guys should do more often. People want it. That's what the people want. Speaker 1 (26:40) I'm leaving it up to Speaker 4 (26:40) Henry. Speaker 1 (26:40) I'm too old for that stuff, Carolyn. I got bills to pay. I'm hoping Speaker 4 (26:44) after this last little excursion with Henry that he tames it down a little bit. Speaker 2 (26:51) Yeah, I was going to sound like he had a shit image when he thought he blew that truck up. Speaker 4 (26:54) Yeah. I Speaker 1 (26:55) was him. Speaker 2 (26:56) Which he doesn't tear that truck up. He really doesn't. It Speaker 1 (26:58) was just a minute of tire smoking. Yeah. Speaker 2 (27:01) Yeah. Speaker 1 (27:03) Yeah. Speaker 4 (27:05) I think he figured it out. He hasn't drove it since. Well, Speaker 2 (27:09) he can't because his tires are literally cords. It will spark going down the road if you drive it. Speaker 4 (27:14) This is also true. This is also true. Speaker 4 (27:19) It happens. Speaker 2 (27:19) It does. Yeah, I'm not knocking. It's his drill. It ain't my deal. Speaker 4 (27:23) Here's my favorite thing. So I grew up with four sisters, and girls are obviously very different than boys. And then I have a boy, and I'm like, I don't know how to navigate this. Like, is this normal? Is this what boys do? Is this not? I Speaker 1 (27:38) used to smoke the tires off of my dad. He would do it. And then Speaker 4 (27:40) Tony's like, no, this is completely normal. I'm like, okay, this is normal. I don't need to be worried about this. It wasn't like me and my sisters were going off smoking our tires off. Like, that never happened. See, Speaker 2 (27:52) Nick and I didn't grow up with helicopters anywhere in the vicinity. So, like, there was a lot of shit that could happen. Like, I know you were helicoptered and then... Speaker 4 (27:59) You should name this podcast the Helicopter Podcast. I Speaker 2 (28:02) should. Speaker 4 (28:02) Because you guys are going to talk about Speaker 3 (28:03) this all night long. Speaker 4 (28:03) I mean, your mom Speaker 2 (28:03) invented the Huey. Speaker 3 (28:07) Nick's neighbor growing up would call his mom and be like, Arlene. do you see what the boys are doing in the yard? And she'd say, just don't watch, Woodrow. Yeah, Speaker 1 (28:15) exactly. That's right. Speaker 3 (28:17) Don't look out the window. Yep. Speaker 1 (28:19) Wouldn't Speaker 2 (28:19) hurt nobody. No. And actually, everything of Henry's, I ain't paid for a single thing that that kid owns. His four-wheeler he bought, his truck he bought, that car I gave to him, but it didn't cost me nothing because I got another vehicle. He can tear up everything he wants. I'm not paying to fix any of it. I didn't pay to buy it. And he doesn't ask Speaker 4 (28:37) you to. Speaker 2 (28:37) No, he doesn't. Nope. Speaker 4 (28:38) He fixes it all himself. Speaker 2 (28:40) So yeah, whatever he wants to do. Have fun. Some of those war wounds on Speaker 1 (28:45) the Speaker 2 (28:45) Buick are suspicious, Speaker 1 (28:46) though. Yeah. That didn't happen from just normal driving. Speaker 2 (28:50) I drove it 2,800 miles and never had the roof caved in. I don't know what we're doing. Speaker 4 (28:56) I do know why the roof is caved in, but I'm not going to say. I've got a pretty good idea. I know. I can't Speaker 2 (29:06) believe he hasn't ripped the manifolds and everything to clear up the engine. The exhaust is dragging the ground. I don't know how you put this car in reverse and don't just peel it. Speaker 1 (29:12) Yeah. I'll clear off, but he will eventually. Yeah. He had a flat tire here two Speaker 2 (29:18) months ago, and so he peels it off, and I brought it in here and fixed it the same day he peeled it off, and he just drove on the donut for like two months, literally. And I said, you realize they were rated for like 20 miles, right? Yeah, it'll be fine. I'm like, well, you're going to blow the donut, then you're going to be, I'm like, just change the tire. So he finally did. Speaker 4 (29:34) He was busy. He had stuff Speaker 3 (29:35) going on. Yeah. Speaker 2 (29:37) We Speaker 3 (29:37) didn't tear vehicles up either, but I do remember. Dad saying, like, we tore up a lot of equipment in the field. And dad being like, I just go from field to field fixing shit you girls have broken. Speaker 2 (29:51) Yeah. Speaker 3 (29:52) Yeah. Speaker 2 (29:54) Yeah, that Speaker 1 (29:55) could get aggravating. Speaker 3 (29:57) He's got a lot of stories about that. I'm Speaker 1 (30:00) sure. When my dad first turned 16 or whatever, he must have borrowed my great-grandpa's truck, who I never met. He was dead before I was born. But I remember dad telling a story that his grandpa never said anything to him about it other than he said, you know, I used to get a lot more miles out of those tires on that truck before you started driving them. Speaker 2 (30:17) Yep. You should actually tell our listeners about your grandpa driving the truck that you got blamed for when he was pulling the wagons. Oh, Speaker 1 (30:23) yeah. Speaker 2 (30:25) Oh, years ago. Which you would have to know Nick's grandpa and dad to really put this into perspective, Speaker 1 (30:30) but it's classic. Absolutely. My grandpa still lived at the farm at the time. And so I was moving the pickup truck from field to field as we were harvesting. Speaker 2 (30:39) You'd have been what, 10 Speaker 1 (30:40) or 12? Yeah, Speaker 2 (30:41) something Speaker 1 (30:41) like that, yeah. So it's about the end of the night. Speaker 1 (30:46) And Grandpa's going to head back to the farm. And he never usually helped us. But for some reason, he had to help us move. Like, we needed an extra driver for something. Because he had long since retired. Like, he didn't help us farm that I ever really remember. Other than occasionally moving a little bit of stuff. And this was probably the last time. So he takes off. And at this point in time, there was a road. And it was mud. Well, it wasn't muddy that day. But it was a dirt road. And it had ruts, you know, two foot deep. Overgrown in trees. We never took that road. Speaker 2 (31:12) And this was in an 86? 85 Ford F-250. Speaker 1 (31:15) Four-wheel drive, yep. Four-wheel drive. And he's pulling a couple empty wagons back, like, we're done for the night, we're not going to need these wagons, we've got the fuel done, take the empty wagons back. Okay. So he takes off, and I'm in the combine with Dad, or maybe I drove a tractor and a wagon back to the farm, whatever it was. Anyway, we get back to the farm. We hop in the said pickup truck, plow down the highway, and the tires are just... The steering wheel is three-quarters of the way the wrong direction. My dad looks over at me and starts chewing my ass. What did you hit in this truck? So I'm like, I didn't hit anything in this truck. He's like, bullshit, it doesn't drive at all. So he chews my ass all the way from the farm to the house. How about how I have destroyed this truck? It was the best driving truck we've ever had. and, you know, all the things. Okay, so we get to the house, and he's still super pissed, and he's telling Mom how I screwed this truck up. And Mom's like, well, actually... I saw your dad take off in it, and he kind of missed the turn, drove up the ditch bank, through the ditch, out in the field, back down and onto the road. Speaker 2 (32:09) Oh, my God. And this is Speaker 1 (32:10) a big ditch. Oh, yeah. Pretty good-sized ditch, pulling two empty wagons. So dad gets on the phone. He calls Grandpa. He's like, hey, did you hit anything in that truck? Grandpa, without missing a beat, he's like, yeah, I missed that turn a little bit. Those four-drive trucks don't turn near as short as I thought they did. And hung up the phone. Now, I never got an apology for the ass-chewing that I took the entire way back. And that later became my truck, so then I never did drive as good. We had it all fixed, but it never was as good as it was before Grandpa ran through the ditch. But he didn't miss a beat. It wasn't his fault. Forward-draft trucks don't turn short enough. He never had a forward-draft truck. Shouldn't Speaker 3 (32:42) have Speaker 1 (32:42) sent him in one. Speaker 3 (32:44) That's funny. Speaker 1 (32:45) No reason to go down that road. It wasn't really drivable, you know. It would have probably been out of alignment anyway if he hadn't hit the ditch as deep as the ruts were in that road. I Speaker 2 (32:54) hope and pray I live to be the age where I can tear shit up and just get out of it and blame everybody else. Absolutely. I didn't Speaker 1 (33:00) do it. Speaker 2 (33:00) Oh, Speaker 1 (33:01) my gosh. Speaker 2 (33:02) Or the classic, just park it and don't say a word. So when the next guy goes to get it, it's destroyed. Yep. Speaker 3 (33:08) I Speaker 1 (33:08) sympathize with your dad because some days you and Colby keep me pretty busy. Flat tires or whatever, you know. Just flat tires or dead batteries or whatever. I don't know why my battery's dead. I can tell you why the lights are on. Well, they were until the battery went dead. My Speaker 4 (33:27) favorite is, is it Tommy Boyer, Black Sheep? What did you do? What did you do? No idea. Speaker 1 (33:35) Yeah, I'm single-handedly keeping Michelin in business. Yeah, I get that. Kelly doesn't walk around the car. If the right rear is flat, it's just going to be flat until she gets to where it's run. Speaker 4 (33:48) I am. I feel like you can tell me if I'm wrong. I feel like I'm a lot better with the new van than I was with the old van. Like I'm paying more attention. I Speaker 1 (33:55) think so. Absolutely. Speaker 4 (33:57) But Speaker 1 (33:57) you really only had one way to go. Speaker 2 (33:59) Well, Speaker 4 (33:59) the Speaker 2 (33:59) old Speaker 4 (34:00) van. Who cares? I really miss the old van. I do. I do. Speaker 1 (34:04) Should Speaker 2 (34:04) have Speaker 1 (34:04) kept it Speaker 2 (34:04) around for those special occasions. Speaker 1 (34:05) Still running like a top. Those nights we would all load up and go to somebody's house to get somebody else or whatever. Those were good times. Speaker 4 (34:11) I know. And now I'm, like, vacuuming it out every other week. Nobody eat food in here. Nobody drink anything. Be careful. Make good choices. Speaker 2 (34:19) Yeah. Yeah, this sucks having nice vehicles. You can't smoke in them. You can't drink in them. You can't do anything. Speaker 4 (34:26) I know. I'm sorry. You're going to really hate driving to Bowling Green. I know. Speaker 2 (34:30) Because Speaker 4 (34:30) we'll have to take the van. I Speaker 2 (34:32) know. Speaker 4 (34:33) Well, I guess Speaker 2 (34:33) if Bob ain't going with us now, we can take the blue truck. Speaker 4 (34:37) I mean, we could. The van would be more comfortable. It would be more comfortable, Speaker 2 (34:41) but I don't know if you quite understand the magnitude of this campground that we're going to. Yeah, Speaker 4 (34:45) no. Speaker 2 (34:46) Somebody might smash into it with two lawnmowers hooked together. Say Speaker 4 (34:49) less. Say less. We're taking the truck. I'll be too worried about the van. I'll Speaker 2 (34:55) be like, be Speaker 4 (34:55) careful. Can we make it through that? Are you Speaker 3 (34:57) sure? Speaker 2 (34:58) So you never participated in the tractor pulling gig, Kelly. What's the deal? You've never been to Bowling Green, right? Speaker 3 (35:03) I've never been to Bowling Green, no. You should go this year. You should Speaker 2 (35:06) go. Speaker 3 (35:07) Because I'm going. I can't. I have work. All you guys are Speaker 1 (35:10) trying to ruin my good time. Yeah. Speaker 3 (35:12) Stop. Nicholas. Like I've ever limited you. Speaker 1 (35:16) Well, that's a pretty broad statement. I think I can make an argument for some limitations, but... I Speaker 3 (35:24) don't know. Speaker 1 (35:25) It wouldn't matter. Most of the fun stuff happens later on in the evening where Kelly's probably not going to be up for it. More than likely. From what I've heard. I've never participated in any of it, but... Speaker 4 (35:37) Exactly. From what I've Speaker 1 (35:38) been told. Speaker 4 (35:38) Exactly. Speaker 1 (35:40) I would have taken my son this year, but school started too early. Bob acts like he ain't going to go now, so I don't know Speaker 2 (35:47) if he's going or not. I keep trying to talk him into it, but whatever. We'll see. Speaker 1 (35:52) He's got Speaker 4 (35:53) plans. Of Speaker 1 (35:54) course he does. You guys are going to be gone. The best Speaker 4 (35:58) was we were discussing tonight and I made some comment about worrying about him or something while I was gone. And I was like, well, you're going to be out until like 3 o'clock in the morning. Of course I'm going to be worried. And he's like, no, Mom. I'm going to come home at midnight because that's my curfew. And I didn't say it, but I'm going to be like, right. Speaker 1 (36:17) That's when they're going to move the party here. Speaker 2 (36:19) Or you could be like my middle brother that snuck out his entire. teenage years because that was always an excuse to mom and dad, which they never knew it until years later. But he's like, well, that was always the rule. You said I had to be home at midnight, and I was, but you didn't say I couldn't leave again. Some of Speaker 1 (36:36) those late-night sneak outs and pickups got pretty sketchy from what I remember. I never snuck out. I didn't either. Speaker 2 (36:42) There would be nights that I agreed to stay somewhere and maybe didn't necessarily stay there, but as far as going home and sneaking out, I never did that. I never Speaker 4 (36:51) did it. My mom would have flat out murdered me if I snuck out. So, yeah, it wasn't happening. Speaker 3 (36:57) I never snuck out once. Not a single time. But I always had a later curfew. My curfew was midnight. And my best friend's, theirs was like 11, 1130. And so it was like, you Speaker 2 (37:08) know. Mine was always midnight until you were 18. Then you're on your own then. You don't like Speaker 1 (37:14) curfews. Speaker 3 (37:15) Mine was Speaker 4 (37:15) midnight until I was 20 years old. Speaker 1 (37:20) Shocker. And Speaker 3 (37:20) I moved out. Speaker 4 (37:22) And I moved out. Speaker 1 (37:25) Well, I can see why they tried to ration you in, Carolyn. I stayed out here until you're out here until 3 or 4 in the morning if you're not supervised properly. Sometimes. Speaker 4 (37:32) Sometimes I get tired and Irish goodbye,