Christy Carlson Romano: Disney Fame, Stage Moms & Starting Over

Not Skinny But Not Fat

Host Amanda Hirsch interviews former Disney star Christy Carlson Romano to discuss her new memoir, 'Once Upon a Trainwreck'. The conversatio

Key takeaways

• Christy Carlson Romano discusses the release of her book 'Once Upon a Trainwreck', which chronicles her life from age five.
• The guest reflects on the tension in her relationship with her mother due to the financial and emotional dynamics of being a child star.

Main topics

• Child stardom and its lasting effects
• Memoir and storytelling

Notable quotes

The whole point of this book is about when you aspire to own your story and you stop caring so much about what people think.

Conclusion

An insightful look at reclaiming one's narrative after a life lived in

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:00) The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Speaker 2 (0:03) Welcome back to the Not Skinny But Not Fat podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Hirsch, and I still can't believe that I get to chat with some of my favorite stars on my very own podcast, where you'll feel like you're just talking shit with your best friends in your living room. Speaker 2 (0:30) Hi, guys. How's everybody doing? I realize that I don't have to say welcome to the Not Skinny But Not Fat podcast. I'm Amanda Hirsch, since you know the podcast you just clicked on, and it says it in my intro. So maybe I'll stop doing that. Maybe not. Anyway, how is everybody? I hope you're having a lovely Tuesday, if you're listening on a Tuesday. And if you're listening on another day, another week, another month, another year, then happy whatever day that is. I'm in a super good mood because I finally shared. Speaker 2 (0:58) my redesigned apartment. I always don't know how to say that. Like my redesigned, my revamped, my like I finally revealed. I revealed it. It's been months and I hate waiting. Like I hate it. Like I just wanted to like show you so long ago. Because, you know, you guys like my house is like the background of my life and my stories and my kids and my everything. And it was always in your faces. So I obviously was excited to show you what's going to be in your face from now on. And actually, I want to tell you about the way it happened because I had the carpet cleaner. Gee, you guys know him. He cleans carpets. And he was over in May at some point. And he posted. Before I posted, like, guess whose apartment I'm cleaning or whose rug I'm cleaning. And he, like, posted just, like, a quick photo he took. And when I saw my apartment from someone else's, like, POV, I was horrified. I was like, oh, my God, like, the pictures on the wall were crooked. And, like, it was just, it looked just bad. And I've been nesting ever since I was first pregnant. Like, I feel like I'm always looking around at night when I'm sitting on the couch watching TV. Instead of doing that, I'm looking around. I'm just like hating on everything. Like I need to change that. And that's why I always change rugs and whatever. And I can't listen. I'm not perfect. I don't think I have a good apartment designed, you know, taste and choosing it myself. But I never thought to like redo anything because I think about it like, you know, I'm in a rental. Like I have kids like it's fine. It's it's it's OK. And it can look OK. Like who needs more than that? And then literally the day that I was mortified by him posting my apartment and I was like, oh, my God, that's what it looks like. Lauren from Klein and Kramer Design reached out to me. She was like, did you ever think to like redo it? Like she was like, you're you're you're thriving and like you're doing, you know, so so well in life and like. you're doing big things and like your apartment should represent that. And she caught me on such a fucking good day to say that to me because I was like, oh, my God, I was feeling kind of that. Like I didn't know to say it like that, but I was feeling it. I was like, fuck, fuck, yes, fuck, yes. And then we went on this journey. We started with the common areas of like entryway, living room, playroom to kind of dining area, which in a New York City apartment, it's like. all one fucking space. And I just love it. It was so fun to like work with them on it and see like choosing the fabrics and choosing the, you know, everything. And it just made me so much happier. I spend so much time at home. I, like I said, just look around all the time and I can get so frustrated and my eyes can be so busy and so overstimulated. And now it's the opposite. It's like looking out and just feeling like, like so good. So I'm so happy to finally share it because now it's going to be in your face 24 seven. And it'll look prettier than it did before. I need to post the before photos. So you remember just like how cluttered and fucking crazy it is. And to everyone saying white with kids, listen, it is what it fucking is. Like I've already had to clean up Leo's poop. It's more than the kids. It's my, my old dog is actually ruining my shit. I've had to clean the carpet, but luckily we did choose a lot of like performance fabrics. So we're okay. Anyway, so that's my good mood. My good mood is also because I'm going to see Harry Styles at MSG tonight. I'm so excited about. I'm going to wear feathers for Harry. I'm going to wear Speaker 3 (4:19) feathers. Speaker 2 (4:21) Anyway, let's get into this week's episode because it was such an interesting interview. She was a huge Disney star, one of the first big stars on Disney. You know her from Even Stevens. You know her as the voice of Kim Possible. You know her from Cadet Kelly. And she's since then was a podcaster, now an author. She has come out with a book, Once Upon a Trainwreck. And she talks a lot about like child stardom and what that does to kids, you know, and it's such an interesting perspective that she has on it. Obviously, she lived it. And her book that I listened to was so great and so interesting. And she's here to talk about all of that. It's Chrissy Carlson Romano for all my millennial girlies that grew up with her. Like, this is just going to bring you right back. Like, it's nostalgic. Talk about Hillary, Duff, Lindsay Lohan, going to school with Macaulay Culkin, Scarlett Johansson, why she would never let her girls become child actors, and so Speaker 3 (5:24) much more. So enjoy. I'm 5'7 and a half. Okay. But I think I'm shrinking. I know I'm shrinking. It's happening. Speaker 2 (5:33) Really? Yeah, 42 and shrinking. I think I grew. Speaker 3 (5:36) That's my next Speaker 2 (5:36) memoir. 42 and shrinking. I grew recently, I tell you. You grew. I thought I was 5'4". And then I went with Noah to a doctor's appointment with my older son. And I measured myself as an adult does before the pediatrician comes in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was 5'5". And I was like, you Speaker 3 (5:54) know Speaker 2 (5:55) what? I'm going to run with it. You expanded Speaker 3 (5:56) with the pregnancy then. Speaker 2 (5:58) For sure. Because my Speaker 3 (5:59) feet Speaker 2 (5:59) too. Speaker 3 (6:00) Okay. Yeah. I used to be a 7. Speaker 2 (6:02) I feel like I'm a 7 and a half now. Emotional, spiritual growth and physical growth. And physical growth. Gotta love pregnancies. Speaker 3 (6:10) Yeah, Speaker 2 (6:10) I Speaker 3 (6:10) think you were pregnant. No, it was before you were pregnant that we were texting and we were DMing. Speaker 2 (6:17) Nah. My first kid is 2020. When did you come out? I think it was for your pod supposed to be. Speaker 3 (6:24) Yeah. When did your Speaker 2 (6:25) pod come out? Speaker 3 (6:26) It was 2021 or two. That was the era of all that shit that we were doing. the podcast back then. Yeah. All the podcasts. No, no, no. Speaker 2 (6:39) I Speaker 3 (6:39) stopped doing it. I mean, I got a lot of flack for random things and I was just like kind of over it. Yeah. I just I don't know. It was like I didn't get like a lot of flack. I don't want to say like I'm problematic. There's nothing problematic about it. Yeah. It's just that like. the whole nostalgia thing and poking holes at nostalgia becomes very messy. Yeah. Speaker 2 (6:57) And Speaker 3 (6:57) like people can have problems with that over time. And so like I've had to like dance around it. And Speaker 2 (7:03) that was the goal of the pod to talk with other child stars. It was Speaker 3 (7:07) one of the goals of the pod. Like I had Corey Feldman on and it created like a problem. And I was like, I don't know what to do about this. And like I was like, do I, do I? do I just take it down? So I took it down and I was like, there's just a, I'm trying, I was trying to, she asked me, I was just with Caitlin Bristow and she was asking me, she was like, so how do you like, what's the line between content and, and like showcasing like what the struggle of a child actor is or something like that? Like what, like what's the line between exploitation or something like, I'm like. When you do a podcast, it is monetized. That is just part of how it is produced. And so if you're a guest on a podcast, it's monetized. So you want to create a safe space, but it's not like it's not people don't understand what it what it is like. You have to monetize it. So it becomes hard to be like, I'm not exactly like a Ph.D. person. That's like not my that's not my thing. Speaker 2 (8:01) Yeah. Yeah. So you didn't want to you didn't want that responsibility. Speaker 3 (8:04) I mean, yeah, Speaker 2 (8:05) responsibility. Speaker 3 (8:06) I hear you. Like for some reason with me, it became a thing of like, well, she's our big sister. She's supposed to know better or something like that. I'm like, I'm figuring this out, too. Speaker 2 (8:16) Yeah. Speaker 3 (8:17) So it's a little frustrating. Speaker 2 (8:19) I listen to the book. Yes. Once Upon a Trainwreck. And I say listen because my audio book girlies, I see you, I hear you. It counts. Okay. It counts. Of course it counts. Speaker 3 (8:29) Did you hear it with me? Of course. Good. Yeah. Okay. Can you hear Speaker 2 (8:32) it not Speaker 3 (8:33) with you? I had friends that I sent the PDF to. Oh, Speaker 2 (8:37) and Speaker 3 (8:37) there's this app. Yeah. I just Speaker 2 (8:38) heard about this app. What is it called? I don't know what they use. It's called you guys. Oh, interesting. OK, somebody just told me about this. And Speaker 3 (8:45) then like they could put their PDF into it and then it spoke to that. And Speaker 2 (8:48) you guys, you can choose apparently like Gwyneth Paltrow to read it to you or something on this speechify thing. Speaker 3 (8:55) Oh, wow. I want to hear Gwyneth Paltrow speak my audio book, which is crazy. Speaker 2 (9:00) How like I mean, that sounds A.I. as fuck. And I don't Speaker 3 (9:05) know, Speaker 2 (9:05) like. Did Gwyneth Paltrow read every letter? And then I don't know how it works, but it is because a lot of times you get a PDF and I cannot read off a PDF. Speaker 3 (9:14) No. You know? No, especially the book that I sent them had all the notes and like weird stuff attached to it too. So they really, my girlfriends actually really did me a solid way reading it or listening to Speaker 2 (9:25) it. And did they give you notes, your friends? No. Oh, Speaker 3 (9:28) okay. You just wanted Speaker 2 (9:29) them to. Speaker 3 (9:29) They're my mom friends. So I was like. are you guys still going to want to know me after reading this? Like PTA wise, like am I screwed with mom friends? It is weird Speaker 2 (9:40) to be a public person, but also like be a mom, go to the school things and have people know things about you. It's going to be weird. I mean, like I know things about you even before the book, you know, but. But you're you're saying there's more fear because of things that maybe people didn't know. Yeah. In the book. Definitely. Like what? What do you what do you worry? Drug Speaker 3 (10:06) and alcohol usage. I can't. But that was the Speaker 2 (10:08) old view. True. You know Speaker 3 (10:10) what? You're right. And I like to think that, like, I live in Austin, Texas, and it's Speaker 2 (10:14) a Speaker 3 (10:14) community of people that keep it weird. But we also do live in sort of the the bougie area, if you will. And like, I'm kind of worried that some of the bougie moms are going to be. bougie. And I don't know. I mean, like, but here's the thing. The whole point of this book is about when you start to own your story and you stop caring so much about what people think. And like, if I wouldn't be living up to the goal of this book, if I didn't at least question myself and be like, OK, what are we doing here? Like, I think this book, it took me two years to write this book, and it's perpetually teaching me things about myself. and my marriage and me as a mother and me as a professional and as a creator and like there's just so many aspects of it it's literally like holding up a mirror to myself yeah and being like this is your life how did you decide to write it like what how did that come Speaker 2 (11:05) about i Speaker 3 (11:06) was i was asked if i had been considering doing something like this by my editor uh shout out to ronnie who i love dearly and uh i was kind of you know they were kind of they were itching to see if I would do it. And I had already done so many of these like YouTube videos and TikToks that were going viral and random things that were just out there for the public to consume. And I think finally just Simon and Schuster element was like, let's make a call over to her and see if she'd be interested in this. But the book proposal was where it had to really diverge from whatever I had been telling people. to really digging deeper and be like, yeah, they don't know about this and they don't know about that. These are things that I haven't shared. So these are, there's some stories in there that are way deeper than what people know. Speaker 2 (11:56) When you say things that are, that went viral, are we talking the Anne Hathaway video? I had to take that out, actually. I chose to Speaker 3 (12:04) take it. So there's an anecdote essentially about me going on an audition for Parade, the musical, that I, I, booked and Anne had been sitting in the, we were talking and we were, she was very, very sweet. And I just met her there and I went in before her for the audition. And I, I did have a really, really stellar audition and I ended up booking the part like in the room and she was like right after me. And so there was an anecdote there where I could have shared it, but because of this whole weird Anne Hathaway gate thing that's happened with me. You decided not to? I decided not to. I was like, I'll just take it out. Speaker 2 (12:39) Okay. So. Speaker 3 (12:40) Of Speaker 2 (12:40) course, like I knew I knew that because I listened to the book. But the the Anne Hathaway video, I feel like it's one of those things in social media that when people just read a headline, they can get it completely wrong. Right. So like you can Google it and you could be like, OK, Christie said she could have had her career. But if you watch the video, obviously that's not what you would say Speaker 3 (13:05) that. That's insane. I mean, I clipped, I clipped a, so when you start posting anywhere, your platform, whether it's, I don't know, Dear Media or whether it's YouTube or TikTok, they have best practices and they're like, this is how you title an episode. This is how you title. Well, we'll get the clicks. Speaker 2 (13:26) Right? Well, we'll get Speaker 3 (13:26) the clicks. And then, of course, it's up to you for your authenticity's sake, for your brand's sake, for you to be like, well, how messy am I going to get? Speaker 2 (13:33) Yeah. You're Speaker 3 (13:33) like, what am I going to say to get people to click and convert and stuff? And so in the beginning phases of me being a YouTuber, I did the Anne Hathaway thing and I was like, this should click clicks. But I didn't what I didn't realize, though, is that people would misconstrue it so heavily. Speaker 2 (13:51) You know, Speaker 3 (13:52) I'm saying like I thought people would be like, what does she mean by that? Oh, that's what she means by that. But they didn't. They're like, she means that. Yeah. So the Internet lacks nuance. And I learned that the hard way because there are so many people that have literally taken one headline that I said and been like, no, Christie thinks that she's Anne Hathaway. She's psychotic. She's a crazy person. How Speaker 2 (14:12) did you deal with receiving backlash for that? I've Speaker 3 (14:16) received backlash for for various things in my career at this point as a creator, I will say. And what I've realized is that there's the irony of people. making content off your content when they are calling you out for making said content and they are doing the exact same thing to make money. And then what are the kids? How do the kids go? Speaker 2 (14:38) Like Speaker 3 (14:39) literally. I'll Speaker 1 (14:40) get Speaker 3 (14:40) going. I'll get going. The amount of drama content that's made on the Internet is something that I just never could have understood. And I think that everybody gets this at a certain point. I think, if anything, when you have haters, it's because you're doing something right, I guess. But it's up to you to kind of still gut check with yourself and you'd be like, wait, maybe maybe I was wrong for doing that. Or can I live with the fact that I did do a little like messy clipping? because it didn't hurt anybody. It certainly didn't hurt Anne Hathaway's career. That bitch is killing it right now. She is crushing it and she looks gorgeous. She's got that baby on the way. You didn't say Speaker 2 (15:13) anything hateful about anybody. You didn't hurt anybody. No. And by the way, I would never do that. In your in this video, this is a person I feel like everyone has, even the haters or people misconstruing it, have had a moment in their life. kind of a revolving doors moment. Remember that movie with the sliding doors, it was called, but a revolving doors moment where it's like, what would have happened if? And people also, we do this, everyone does this, even though we say we shouldn't, we compare ourselves to other people and wonder like why we're not doing those things or, and all that is, is human nature also. It's really interesting how the internet just chooses things to be upset about. Yeah. Speaker 3 (15:53) And so therefore, I would say that where I'm at in my life now is just accepting that that is part of it and part of showing up. But what I think worries me about the past and posting and stuff is that people will try to put that onto my book and be like, oh, this is Christy sort of complaining about her past or being bitter. This book is not. like that at all. This book has so much to do with being a mother, my alcoholism, my drug usage, like my toxic relationships, ending up in an FBI office, like being in New York 9-11, which I have shared about, but going to Afghanistan. And like there's I mean, you've listened to the book. There's a lot of different corners of the world that my ass just stumbled into. Yeah. And the reflections upon those things that have nothing to do with trying to click bait. or try to convert people or anything like that. This book is a genuine piece of my life on paper. Speaker 2 (16:52) I really enjoyed it. Good, Speaker 3 (16:55) thank you. And Speaker 2 (16:56) I really enjoyed hearing your story. I think it's fascinating. Obviously, we're all fascinated by people in Hollywood and actors and child stars and how they get to, how they started, how they got to where they are. Like, that's just fascinating to me. And you really do kind of... take us through that entire journey from when you were five. I mean, it goes chronologically. Yep. It's literally goes by years by how old you were from when you started when you were five. And until today, you write in the prologue that your quarter life crisis happened on the Internet. What did you mean by that? How did that play out? Which part? All of it? I feel like Speaker 3 (17:35) I feel like just after having my kids. Speaker 3 (17:41) I was really, after having my first kid, it's even sort of alluded to in the book, I started creating content and it gave me such a new chapter in my career. And I was able to monetize my content and become a creator and identify as a creator, which, you know, even though I have this traditional background, I was still kind of like, well, what am I now? Right. And what I didn't even think of nostalgia in the beginning phases of posting. I was mostly posting like, here's my pregnancy bump and like, here's my toys. And initially I was posting just to get free baby stuff. Yeah. And then it became a thing of like, I got a deal for like 12 months that actually got me out of a little apartment with my husband in West Hollywood out to a house in Orange County. And so. We were leasing it, of course, but it was like still the idea that like, wow, this is a new lane for us as new parents. Where does where does this go? Speaker 2 (18:41) And you didn't have to rely on like booking booking the next thing. Exactly. You didn't have to wait for the phone to Speaker 3 (18:47) ring. Yeah. Speaker 2 (18:48) You Speaker 3 (18:48) got to actually take a photo in the grocery store of a cereal brand or this or that and hit them up on Instagram and be like, hey, would you like to set up a phone call? I'd really like to talk to you about my love for your product. And most of the time, it's a very genuine conversation about, hey, like, do you guys have budget? And would you guys like to work with Speaker 2 (19:06) me? Speaker 3 (19:06) You were doing Speaker 2 (19:06) outreach at the beginning? I still do outreach. Oh, you do? Yeah, Speaker 3 (19:09) I Speaker 2 (19:10) still do outreach. You sound like you're a business lady. Do I? Yeah. I Speaker 3 (19:14) did wear a suit for you. You did wear a suit. I did wear a suit for you. But like, no, Speaker 2 (19:17) it Speaker 3 (19:17) just Speaker 2 (19:17) sounds like you really do take this business seriously. And like, you're like, I'm a creator. I like you're in it. Speaker 3 (19:26) I love creators. I have nothing but like absolute joy in my heart for what it means to be somebody who creates because it's really hard. Speaker 2 (19:37) Yeah. This Speaker 3 (19:37) job is a very consistent thing that is 24-7. And you do need to find a right team for you over time because I've run and gunned it by myself with my husband and like very few people. uh have been welcomed into the fold of this and then i've had a lot of turnover over time because i've been like i can do this on my own i don't need to pay this person and so it's it's you can always rely on yourself and that way it becomes a little harder uh to say to yourself well the money's really good and you figure out how to keep that going and you also want to make sure though that a you're promoting things that you really believe in and then b that you're never not making enough content for it to kind of balance out. You know what I mean? Like you got to make enough content for people to be like, well, this is, I'm still tuning in to talk to Christy and I want to see her story times and, and, uh, yeah, it can't just be Speaker 2 (20:35) QVC. You know what I mean? We'll be right back after the break. I am still trying