Does Gemma need anger management?!

Lost In Translation

Gemma and Gorka recount a series of recent personal mishaps, including London train delays and a split lip caused by their daughter Mia. The

Key takeaways

• Gemma suffered a split lip after her daughter Mia accidentally headbutted her while falling asleep.
• Gorka experienced significant travel disruptions due to cancelled trains and closed tracks in London.

Main topics

• Travel disruptions
• Parenting anecdotes

Notable quotes

I'd be going to see the Jonas Brothers with Papa.

Conclusion

A humorous exploration of personal chaos and the evolving social norms

Transcript preview

Speaker 2 (0:00) A Rayo Original Podcast. Speaker 2 (0:06) Coming Speaker 4 (0:06) up. Proximamente. Speaker 2 (0:08) Woke up in the morning, I had a headache in my finger. You'd, like, ghost them for months and then you'd message saying, hey, I'm just checking, are you on your own tonight? Yeah, yeah. And you'd go, reply, see, told you no-one wants you. Speaker 4 (0:22) Please, God, never let her do that, yeah? Speaker 2 (0:24) If we ever broke up, I'd occasionally pipe, but I wouldn't have a relationship with anybody. I'd be going to see the Jonas Brothers with Papa. And I'm Speaker 4 (0:33) like, yes, girl. Speaker 2 (0:35) I said f***ing wait, have a bit of f***ing patience. There's people in front of me and a vehicle reversing, so f***ing wait. Speaker 4 (0:41) Gemma, I think you have anger issues. Speaker 2 (0:52) So we're back. Speaker 4 (0:53) Yes. I've not Speaker 2 (0:54) seen you for days. I Speaker 4 (0:56) know, yesterday and before, the day before. Speaker 2 (0:58) You've been stuck on a train. Speaker 4 (1:00) Yeah, I mean, I wasn't stuck on a train, but yeah. You Speaker 2 (1:02) were stuck in London because of the trains. Speaker 4 (1:04) Yeah. Not Speaker 2 (1:04) a bad place to be, though, when you've got mates there. Speaker 4 (1:06) Yeah, but it's just the trains. Yeah, Speaker 2 (1:08) it's a nightmare. Everyone I speak to at the minute has had issues with public transport. Speaker 4 (1:12) I was on the train now, and every stop was extra five minutes delays. Oh. And they would say... If you travel on the weekend, make sure that you travel before Saturday at 4pm or Sunday after 4pm. There will be disruptions in the lines which will cancel trains. Always at the weekends also. Of Speaker 2 (1:29) course it is. I hope it's not like that when we go down. We're taking the kids to London soon. We'll tell you about that on the next step, though. This Speaker 4 (1:35) morning, I got to the station. You know how in Houston, outside, you have the... You know how you have the screens inside? Yeah. You have them outside. And I got in and I was like, oh, no. I panicked because I saw so many red crosses. And I was like, oh, no, don't tell me those trains are cancelled today. And it was three trains also cancelled. Speaker 4 (1:55) What is the track? Track four, five and six were closed. So they were like with the red. What's going Speaker 2 (2:01) on with all these trains? And of course, the morning of Gorka being stuck in London, we had an engineer come in to fix our CCTV. Speaker 3 (2:08) And Speaker 2 (2:08) we leave for school at half eight. And I thought to myself when the engineer was booked in, I was like, well, Gorka can stay with him while I take the kids. But of course, Gorka was stuck in London. He came at 20 past eight, bless him. And I was like. We're leaving for school in like nine minutes. So if this job isn't done in nine minutes, I don't know what's going to happen. Speaker 4 (2:25) Kids can't be late for school. Speaker 2 (2:26) No. And he ended up, he was really good. He ended up, he just waited. He was like, don't worry, you go and I'll just wait. So I just left him with Benji. Did the school run come back and we got it fixed. Speaker 1 (2:35) Are you Speaker 2 (2:35) comfy there? I am quite comfy, yeah. Look at me with my calves out. Look at them calves. Speaker 2 (2:41) Look at them. Speaker 4 (2:42) And Lisa, are you matching socks? Speaker 2 (2:44) Matching socks, Speaker 4 (2:45) tan calves, Speaker 2 (2:46) life's good. Tan calves? Fix CCTV, and my sock's filthy on that camera. Speaker 4 (2:50) Why do you have tan calves? Why is that bruise? Speaker 2 (2:53) I've no idea. Speaker 4 (2:54) I'm bruising like a peach. And what happened to your lip? Speaker 2 (2:56) My lip? Oh, my own child headbutted me. I was quite impressed, actually. When Gorka was away, bless her, Mia said to me, can you lie with me till I fall asleep? And normally she's... They're good, we're going to bed, aren't you? They both are. They're like, we're tired, let's go to bed. And I think it's because you were out. She was like, can you lie with me until I fall asleep? I said, yeah, of course I can. So I lay with her. Within minutes, she's gone, like normal. But she's a very light sleeper, Mia, isn't she? Thiago's like me, he'll sleep a Speaker 4 (3:23) lot. She Speaker 2 (3:23) sleeps, and then you move, you're like, oh, you're Speaker 4 (3:24) going? Yeah. Are you going back down? Speaker 2 (3:26) But I went to kiss her forehead because I thought she was asleep. because I always kiss the kids. I go in the room, even, like, we put the kids to bed, I'll go and read a book. As I'm nodding off, I have to go and give them a kiss before bed. Just this weird thing I do all the time. Yeah, I always have to do it. And I kiss the monitor. It's bizarre, but I have to do it. So I went to kiss her forehead. Speaker 4 (3:46) Yeah, Speaker 2 (3:46) I went to kiss her forehead, thinking she was flat out. She was in that in-between stage of sleep. I made a jump. She went, whoa! She flung her head up, literally split my lip. Speaker 2 (3:58) Absolutely wrecked. Speaker 4 (3:59) And probably you went like that and you bited your own lip, no? Speaker 2 (4:02) I was moving in and then she went, oh, you made me jump and I went, it's okay and then she went, your lip. Speaker 4 (4:07) It's actually quite sexy, you Speaker 2 (4:09) know? What, a cut lip? Yeah, Speaker 4 (4:10) it gives it a bit of rough, you know, like, hmm. Speaker 2 (4:12) Why don't you let me do Thai boxing again? Then I'll look rough. Speaker 4 (4:15) Yeah, and the one I have broken nose. That's true. Or broken eyebrow, you know? Speaker 2 (4:18) But no, Speaker 4 (4:19) it Speaker 2 (4:19) split. And then she was like, I'm so sorry. And I said, oh, don't worry, it's fine. And I went into the bathroom and I went, oh my gosh. It is actually a lot better now. Did you know, if Speaker 4 (4:28) you put the, you know, like the yogurt, natural yogurt, and you just leave it there, and then do like this, it heals quickly. Speaker 2 (4:34) But you'd eat it. You'd eat the yogurt. Speaker 4 (4:35) No, but just let it sink a little bit. Like if you do like that with the yogurt and put it there, because of the probiotic of the yogurt, it... regenerates the mucus of your inside part of your... Speaker 2 (4:45) Saliva. Speaker 4 (4:46) Not saliva, the tissue of inside of your mouth, it regenerates quicker. Speaker 2 (4:51) Oh, okay. If only you'd have told me that when it happened. I know it because when I was Speaker 4 (4:53) competing, my partner turned and instead of having her arms fully straight, she bent them and she was doing double turn, so I have a full elbow in here and it broke all inside. Speaker 2 (5:03) Yeah, it's not good. Speaker 4 (5:04) No. Speaker 2 (5:06) Anyway... Anyway, I was proud of her because she's got a strong head. Do you know what I mean? One day she might need to nut someone. I mean, Speaker 4 (5:12) she's very mad, so she has a strong... Speaker 2 (5:14) Well, yes, she gets the big brain from you and the strong head muscles from me. Mm Speaker 4 (5:17) -hm. Speaker 2 (5:17) Perfect combo. So you go for it? Without further ado... Vamanos! Speaker 2 (5:27) As well as my busted lip, I've had an infected finger. What? My bust lip. Speaker 4 (5:32) Oh, I was going to do something else. Speaker 2 (5:34) That's gone down now. I've been in the wars, haven't I? Look at me, feeling sorry for myself. You are very Speaker 4 (5:41) clumsier, you know. Speaker 2 (5:42) No, I had a random idea the other day. It's not a random idea. I've wanted to do it for a while. Painting our back fence. The whole fence. Now, it's quite a tricky job. It's Speaker 3 (5:50) a Speaker 2 (5:50) big fence, isn't it? It's Speaker 3 (5:51) a Speaker 2 (5:51) long, you know, we're very lucky we've got a big garden. It's Speaker 3 (5:54) a Speaker 2 (5:54) lot of fencing. I had to go underneath the bushes and it took me, I started, it was about 10 to 11 when I started. And what time did I finish? Speaker 4 (6:03) When we came back from Big Amir from school. Speaker 2 (6:05) But I had more to do then. That's what Speaker 4 (6:06) I mean, yeah, you got around until like seven, yeah. Speaker 2 (6:08) Yeah, so from like literally 11 till seven I was painting. And in Speaker 4 (6:11) our garden there's one area that we have a big, like a rose plant. Rose bush, yeah. And she was painting, you go here. Speaker 2 (6:17) Ah, ah, ooh, bloody egg. I've still got some of the scratches. I was scratched to death. I've got paint all over me woot, but I just thought, no, look, there's the scratches. I thought, you've got to get through it. So I was just painting away, going, ah, ah, ah. Like, you know, just doing Speaker 4 (6:35) it. Can you take these out for me, please? Speaker 2 (6:37) And then I had them in my finger and I came out and I said to Gorka, can you take these out? Anyway, he was pulling the thorns out of my fingers. Thought nothing of it, went to bed. Woke up in the morning, I had a headache in my finger. I was like, oh, my finger's pulsing. And I looked. It's swollen up, hasn't it? And Speaker 4 (6:55) apparently it goes through your... All red, Speaker 2 (6:56) like yellow bit in the side. And I was like, oh, that's weird. And when I bent it, it felt like it was going to pop. I obviously FaceTimed my mum because what else would a near 42-year-old woman do with an emergency? Did Speaker 4 (7:07) you stay with your mum on holidays? Speaker 2 (7:08) Yeah, my mum was on holidays. I was like, mum, look at my finger. And Peter, you know, Peds engineer, marvellous at everything, he said, thorns travel up. And I didn't know this. They're going Speaker 4 (7:19) to Speaker 2 (7:19) your Speaker 4 (7:19) artery. Speaker 2 (7:19) Yeah, he said, you need to get them out. I said, well, Gorka pulled them out. And he said, yeah, but did he? So then I thought. Speaker 4 (7:25) So Speaker 2 (7:25) he went and got a spyglass. My mum's got a magnifying glass in her house. Speaker 4 (7:30) I Speaker 2 (7:31) went and got a spyglass. Yeah. Pulled them out properly. And they're just going down. So it was quite therapeutic though, like with tweezers and a pin pulling out the thorns because you hadn't got them out properly. Speaker 4 (7:45) You know, as a kid I was scared about moving them, yeah? Speaker 2 (7:48) Moving thorns? Speaker 4 (7:50) Yeah, because you had to do like needles or the twickers. The tweezers? Not twickers. Speaker 2 (7:54) Twickers. Speaker 4 (7:55) The Speaker 2 (7:55) tweezers. And Speaker 4 (7:56) how do you call it? It's chestnuts, the ones that are inside of a spiky ball. Speaker 2 (8:01) Like a Speaker 4 (8:02) conker? Yeah. So, where I used to live, it was like a conker forest, and we used to go there at the autumn, and I slept on the ground and fell backwards, so I put my hands, so my whole palms were full of the little things of the conker, and I had to take them all removed. Imagine, I was like, my hands! I can imagine. With the little, like, needle, they have to do this, it was horrible. So my mum did with a... towel, like a rough towel and vinegar, put it there and you brush it because the vinegar take it out. Speaker 2 (8:35) Yeah. And milk as well, apparently. Yeah, Speaker 4 (8:37) that's what Ryan said. Yeah, Speaker 2 (8:38) Ryan's stylist. He said, put your finger in some milk. Speaker 4 (8:41) Doll doll. Put Speaker 2 (8:42) finger in milk doll doll, it'll suck it out. That's what he said. Speaker 4 (8:44) Changing conversations, yeah? So, we have some questions here, actually. I Speaker 2 (8:49) was going to say, we've made it all about us, but we have had some lovely questions. But we... We had Fraser come and stay with us, speaking of questions. And we got our own little questionnaire going, didn't we? So Fraser's not recently. Broke up. Him and his missus broke up. Yeah, Speaker 4 (9:05) a Speaker 2 (9:05) few months now, Speaker 4 (9:06) no? Speaker 2 (9:06) A Speaker 4 (9:06) few Speaker 2 (9:06) months ago. All amicable. Lovely. Both lovely, just not right together. Speaker 4 (9:10) So for those ones who maybe remember, or those ones who know Fraser, a few episodes back, we were talking about random tattoos that you got done when you were young. And he's my friend with a foxy and his butt cheek. Speaker 2 (9:22) Yeah, he's got a tattoo of a fox on his ass. Speaker 4 (9:24) No, a foxy. A Speaker 2 (9:25) foxy. The Speaker 4 (9:26) one of the Tolley Pepper. The Tolley Pepper. Foxy. Speaker 2 (9:30) But he came up and because he's single now and he's living in Glasgow at the minute, but he's lived in Cardiff, he's lived in London and he works for a company who travels like all over the place and they travel to New York a lot. And Gorka said to him, didn't you? You were like, mate. why don't Speaker 3 (9:46) you Speaker 2 (9:46) go and live in New York? Tell them why you suggested you live in New Speaker 4 (9:49) York. Because the company, I work with them, they are based in New York. So I was like, if I was you, you're 31, 32, you're single now, you don't have like responsibility, like no children, no dogs, no anything, yeah? So I was like, if I was you, I'll go to New York for like a few months. stay there, work in there, you know, meet some chicas. He specifically Speaker 2 (10:14) told them, told him where to meet these chicas. Because I saw them there. Because he saw them and said to Fraser, you want to go this place, you should see the girls there. Speaker 4 (10:23) No, I didn't say that. I said to Fraser, if I was you, or if I was single, I'll go to New York. I said to him, you don't spend money on cocktails and nights out or anything. I was like, because when I went running there for the thing, I have to do the filming on the running thing. So if you go to the West Highway of Manhattan. Speaker 2 (10:40) The Speaker 4 (10:40) specific Speaker 2 (10:40) location of these fit Speaker 4 (10:41) girls. Between 5.30, 6 in the morning to like 7 hours there, it's all these round clubs and it's all the girls with the aloe yoga outfits running there, walking their dogs, looking at the boys' topless there. It's like that. Speaker 2 (10:53) So that's the advice Gorka giving. Go to New York, our 5am run club. And you're hooked Speaker 4 (10:59) up. So if you and I one time break up, hopefully not. Touch wood. But if we break up and you don't know where I am, find me in Manhattan. I'll find you in New York. Speaker 2 (11:07) You'll Speaker 4 (11:07) be in Manhattan. Speaker 2 (11:09) That's a good movie name, Find Me in Manhattan. Yeah. I don't think I'd date. If we ever broke up, I'd occasionally pipe, but I wouldn't have a relationship with anybody. This is Speaker 4 (11:17) like, I wouldn't date, occasionally pipe.