Why Joe Marler Owes EVERYTHING to Richard Osman

Joe Marler Will See You Now

In this episode, hosts Joe Marler and Jake Bhardwaj interview media icon Richard Osman about his accidental transition from TV producer to b

Key takeaways

• Richard Osman became a presenter by accident while pitching the show 'Pointless' to the BBC.
• Osman discusses the evolution of TV culture from a more aggressive era to a more collegiate one.

Main topics

• Richard Osman's career metamorphosis
• TV production and game show formats

Notable quotes

I had zero interest. I mean that.

Conclusion

A high-energy, comedic exploration of how a behind-the-scenes professi

Transcript preview

Speaker 1 (0:04) Er... Jake? Yes? Where is it? What? Speaker 3 (0:12) I knew it. Speaker 1 (0:13) What? I knew it. What? Speaker 3 (0:16) You took it, didn't you? Go on. Look me in the eyes. Okay? And tell me you did not take... I don't get anywhere near those drawers. Go on. The Ross Kemp wig and wear it on Horrible Histories. Speaker 1 (0:35) I want Speaker 3 (0:37) you to look me in the eyes and I want you to eyebrows because I saw on your Instagram a story of you doing Horrible Histories and that wig, I went, oh, this is so good. I wonder what he's doing. And then I went, hang on. That looks a lot like the wig that Ross Kemp had on. Speaker 1 (0:53) It's not in my drawers. Did you knit my wig? It may be similar to the Roskamp wig, but it's not the Roskamp wig. Eyebrows? Right, so again, you're going to need to explain. I would say, as a rule, you always need to explain what this eyebrows thing is. Speaker 3 (1:05) Okay, eyebrows. Are you betting your eyebrows that you're telling me the truth? And if I find out you're lying, I get to shave your eyebrows. That's how eyebrows work. Speaker 1 (1:11) Yes, I'm not... Say eyebrows. Eyebrows. Okay, thank you. I would never take anything from those drawers, whether it be the Roskamp wig. Yep. Michael's ball bag. Speaker 3 (1:25) Michael Ball's ball bag? Speaker 1 (1:27) What is it? Michael Ball's ball bag? No, it's the Michael Ball bag. Speaker 1 (1:34) That doesn't get old, does it? Does it? The Michael Ball bag. No, it doesn't. I also don't think anyone really enjoys it as much as we do. No. That we got Michael Ball to pick up balls from the Michael Ball bag. Speaker 3 (1:46) Did you ever see the clip where my anus was out and we covered it with Michael Ball's thingy and someone went, why have you used Michael Ball's face? We're like, it's not Michael Ball's face. It's the face from Michael Ball's bag that's been put on my anus. Plus, you'd rather that than Speaker 1 (2:01) the actual anus. It's such a specific Easter egg, the Michael Ball bag. Oh, man. Speaker 1 (2:09) Okay, so you didn't nick the wig. I didn't Speaker 3 (2:11) nick the wig. Okay, so that's Speaker 1 (2:12) the Speaker 3 (2:12) aggression. I am Speaker 1 (2:13) doing some Speaker 3 (2:14) scenes in Horrible Histories. Yeah, that's the aggression. I'll say that Speaker 1 (2:16) now. I'm filming it at the moment. When it goes to series, they may be like, all of this is rubbish. We're cutting all these scenes. Joey from Friends? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It could be. Speaker 3 (2:25) It Speaker 1 (2:25) could be. But you never know. For now, I'm having a very good time trying on different wigs. I'm Speaker 3 (2:28) really, really excited. Speaker 1 (2:30) I'm very excited. Genuinely excited. It is a proper like, you get picked up at half five in the morning. You get to the location and then... Oh, Speaker 3 (2:39) you get picked up. Speaker 1 (2:40) Yeah, oh. I see. That wasn't very relatable, was it? Speaker 3 (2:46) Oh, okay. On this particular... Unless you... I've Speaker 1 (2:50) got a bloody cycle here, so, you know, man of the people. Speaker 1 (2:58) Yeah, you turn up, you are doing like three, four different characters a day, wigs in, pins in the wig, different costumes. You get mud on your face if you're playing a peasant. You get rings on your fingers if you're playing a king. You get all sorts, and then you just bang, bang, bang, bang. It's great. It's great. Everyone's so funny. Do you have to do like any accents on it? Oh, yeah. Speaker 3 (3:18) You know that one I saw in a wig? Are you allowed to tell me what sort of? Yeah, Speaker 1 (3:21) that was a French peasant. So I was being a French peasant, I was doing a French accent, it was not so good, but I was trying my best. Is that your Speaker 3 (3:29) gut where you put your teeth? There was another Speaker 1 (3:31) one where I was being a gladiator. I had to be a Geordie gladiator. Speaker 3 (3:35) I don't think that's very accurate. Speaker 1 (3:38) No, but it's a laugh, isn't it? I thought Speaker 3 (3:41) the whole point of Horrible Histories was to be informative. You thought the Speaker 1 (3:45) whole point of Horrible Histories was historical accuracy. I thought it was informative and funny. Speaker 3 (3:49) It Speaker 1 (3:49) is informative, Speaker 3 (3:51) but Speaker 1 (3:51) as you said... You can have a laugh with it as well. You can play with it. You can play with it. So that's what I've been doing. You've also been playing a gladiator. I ape it. Because you're a gladiator in gladiators. Good. How is it? Is it all right? Speaker 3 (4:05) Very tight lycra. Oh. Very. Really? Very tight. Uncomfortably so. To the point of which I had to wear a girdle. You know what a girdle is? No. Like a fat sucker. Speaker 1 (4:22) Oh, what, the thing that pushes everything in? Yeah. So I wore a Speaker 3 (4:24) girdle and a Spanx under the Lycra suit that I had to wear in order to tuck in all my jelly. Yeah. But because I was wearing so many layers of Lycra and Spanx underneath it to tuck it away, it made me even more jellified. So it was a good Speaker 1 (4:44) day all round really. That's so much more jelly than I thought would be in that answer. Speaker 3 (4:48) Mate, but honestly it was so much fun. So hard. Really? Way harder I thought it was going to be. Speaker 1 (4:54) It's average Joes up against an athlete. Surely you're just like swatting them like flies. That's what I thought it might be like. What is it actually like? It Speaker 3 (5:04) is a lot harder and that is all I can reveal. Really? I thought Speaker 1 (5:09) you'd just be like, next. Slap them away, next. With your pugil stick? All I can say is that I Speaker 3 (5:17) kept my pugil stick clean. Fine. I cannot reveal any more, and you will have to wait for it to come out. People put big money on who wins gladiators, mate. Do they? So I can't reveal anything. Okay. What I will say is I didn't realise how popular a show it was. It's massive. It's a mega show. Make a show. The kids, the amount of families they come up to and go, oh my God, are you going to be the new gladiator? You're going to do gladiators? You're a gladiator? I was like, what? And again, I'm having that same problem where they go, they now don't know me for rugby. This lot don't know me for traitors either. They just go, oh, Speaker 2 (5:58) you're the new gladiator, aren't you? Really? Speaker 3 (6:00) Oh my God, I just don't have any identity left. Speaker 1 (6:03) And I tell you who's got lots of identities, the guest coming tonight. Good. This is someone with loads of identities. In fact, someone who has done so many things, it's easier to list the things he's not done. Speaker 3 (6:14) If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have gone on Traitors. And if it wasn't... Seriously! If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be sitting here now with you. If it wasn't for him, I would never have met you. Speaker 3 (6:29) Flipping heck. Speaker 1 (6:30) Genuinely, that's... Right, I'm going to just burst the bubble now so we can find out what you're on about. Yeah. It's Richard Osman. Richard Osman. TV presenter, former TV producer, author. Writes books, Speaker 3 (6:42) podcaster. Speaker 1 (6:43) So Speaker 3 (6:43) what do Speaker 1 (6:43) you mean? He Speaker 3 (6:44) put you in for traitors? I went and met... The booker for traitors rang me, or rang my agent, and said, oh, we'd love to have a meeting with Joe and... see if he'd be keen to come on the traitors I was like absolutely yes let's do it immediately now and when I met her And she turned around, like, opening things. She was lovely, but opening things was like, I'll be straight. I've no idea who you are. I don't really know much about you. And the only reason I was put in touch with you is because of Richard Osman. He said I should take a look at you. He'd been on my previous podcast. He'd met before I'd done House of Games with him. And he was like, oh, have a look at him, mate. From a sport angle, he might be something different or to fill that sport. booking you're looking for and I was like what I knew I mean I'd done House of Games I'd met him twice but we weren't like close or anything and he put my name forward and then Speaker 3 (7:45) The rest is history, which is also part Speaker 1 (7:48) of the podcast Speaker 3 (7:49) family. Which Speaker 1 (7:50) is lovely. It's Speaker 3 (7:51) fine. Speaker 1 (7:53) That's quite remarkable. So all of this, this entire operation... Speaker 3 (7:56) It's Speaker 1 (7:58) pretty much down to him. Speaker 3 (8:00) Bloody hell. Are you excited to meet him? Yeah, I mean, obviously. The Speaker 1 (8:04) guy was a TV producer that came up with loads of quiz shows, loads of game shows. I love quiz shows, I love game shows. I used to... working TV as well, he's sort of done everything I wanted to do, but on a gigantic scale. Not because of his height, because of his achievements. Speaker 3 (8:21) Okay, right, let's do this. Janet, could you send in Richard Osman, please? Speaker 1 (8:28) Thank you. Richard Osman, everybody! Yes! Speaker 2 (8:36) Yes! Speaker 1 (8:36) Yes! Speaker 2 (8:37) Hi, Joe, how are you? Yeah. Hi, Jake. Richard, hi. Are we doing tall stuff? Speaker 1 (8:44) Yeah, I wouldn't do it, Joe. We're going to straighten on that. Speaker 2 (8:48) What are you, 5'9"? For Speaker 1 (8:52) the audio listener, Joe just got owned. Do your Speaker 2 (8:54) knees fit under the desk? Speaker 1 (8:59) Height-wise, yes. Width-wise, no. Which is crazy. If you could see the desk in real life, you'd be astounded by that fact. Hello, Joe. How are you? Speaker 3 (9:08) Yeah, really well. How are you? Dr. Joe, thank you. Yeah. Thank you. I'm an Speaker 2 (9:12) illegal, but absolutely, go for it. Speaker 3 (9:15) How did you find Janet? She's great. Speaker 2 (9:17) Was she? She's writing a novel, so we had a long chat about that. Janet's writing a novel? Yeah. The Speaker 3 (9:23) other Speaker 2 (9:23) week, Speaker 3 (9:24) she was selling meth. Speaker 2 (9:26) Yeah. And Speaker 3 (9:27) now she's writing a novel. Fifty Speaker 2 (9:28) Shades of Filth. Yeah. It goes from bad to worse, doesn't it? Speaker 3 (9:31) What sort Speaker 2 (9:32) of novel is she writing? Like a romanticie. It's a romanticie type thing about two podcast hosts. She didn't tell me anything more about it. Both men. Both very different. Both very different men. It's like a kind of opposites attract, love across the divide type thing. A former Tory Speaker 1 (9:48) MP and a former Labour spin doctor, perhaps. Yeah, that sort of Speaker 2 (9:51) thing. Speaker 1 (9:51) Interesting. That sort of thing. I'm absolutely Speaker 2 (9:54) certain one of them was a rugby player, but I can't. The other guy, I didn't know so well. Speaker 3 (10:00) Right, intake questionnaire, let's begin. Full name. Speaker 2 (10:02) Richard Thomas Osman. Speaker 3 (10:05) Okay. Thomas, be it a family member usually? My grandfather, yeah. My granddad. Good. Speaker 2 (10:10) Star Speaker 3 (10:10) sign? Speaker 2 (10:11) Sagittarius. Can't you tell? First one. Speaker 1 (10:15) No, I'm not your first Speaker 2 (10:16) Sagittarius. How many guests have you had? Speaker 1 (10:18) 40. 40. 40. 40, yes. First Sagittarius. Speaker 2 (10:21) That's insane. Speaker 1 (10:22) Would you describe yourself as fiery, free-spirited, and optimistic, Richard? Speaker 2 (10:25) Fiery, free-spirited, and optimistic. I don't think I'm any of those things. I am, what's the opposite of fiery? Watery, I suppose. Soggy. Soggy. Soggy. Optimistic, no. I know the opposite of that, which is pessimistic. And Speaker 3 (10:39) free-spirited, no. No. Locked up, my spirit. Quite confined. A confined spirit. And ushered around by people Speaker 2 (10:47) telling you what to say and not say. Yeah. Are you talking about my publicist, Olivia? Speaker 3 (10:52) No, no. My Speaker 2 (10:53) publicist, Olivia, I never ever bring people to these shows, right? It's just twice in my entire career of writing, she has come to a show. Once was when I was on Graham Norton and Tom Hanks was on. The second time is now. Wow. Yeah. Speaker 3 (11:11) Now, I'm assuming the way you've teed that up is that that is... Speaker 2 (11:15) She's a huge Jake fan. No, she is a... As am I. She is an enormous Joe Marla fan. Harlequin season ticket holder. Speaker 3 (11:24) Really? Yeah. Wow, now we're getting into... Yeah, now, okay, now we're getting into it. Fine. Great. Thank you so much for coming. She's on my side. She's on, yeah. Nice to have someone in the room on my side. Speaker 1 (11:35) Was Joe your favourite player? Fucking Speaker 3 (11:37) don't turn it into this. Speaker 2 (11:39) Am I allowed to speak? Speaker 1 (11:39) Yeah. What she Speaker 2 (11:41) reads. Speaker 1 (11:41) And just so anyone watching this knows, when people come, everyone's allowed to speak. There's no sort of totalitarian thing going on here. But the Speaker 2 (11:51) thing is, Jake, in seven years of working with me, she hasn't been allowed to. So I think she was asking Speaker 1 (11:54) me. You are genuinely surprised. Speaker 3 (11:57) I'm allowed to Speaker 1 (11:58) speak in Speaker 3 (11:58) front Speaker 1 (11:58) of Sir. Speaker 3 (11:59) Richard, can I speak? Speaker 1 (12:03) He was one of them, absolutely. Oh, no. Speaker 3 (12:05) Enough. Speaker 1 (12:07) Enough. What era are we talking about? I was all for this, but you're here and you couldn't even just lie and say he was. He was one of them. It's lovely. Speaker 3 (12:13) It is, anyway. It's not my... Lovely, thank you, though. We'll have that after. Occupation. Novelist. Interesting. Just an out-and-out novelist. All the other stuff, you know, the unbelievably popular podcast Speaker 2 (12:27) you do, Speaker 3 (12:28) all Speaker 2 (12:28) the TV bits. You can't be a podcaster as a job. That's insane. You've had a real job. Speaker 1 (12:35) Joe, you need to speak to HMRC immediately. Speaker 3 (12:41) The definition of a job is you're paid for services you provide. I suppose Speaker 2 (12:45) so. I just think you have to do a day's work for a day's pay. And you appear not to be doing a day's work. That's what I'm saying. By your own admission. I'm a huge fan, as you know. No, you're fine. Speaker 3 (12:56) Okay, novelist. Okay. Speaker 2 (12:58) Yes. Speaker 3 (12:59) Sorry, is Speaker 2 (13:00) that Speaker 3 (13:00) news Speaker 2 (13:00) to you? Speaker 3 (13:00) No, it certainly isn't. But I'm intrigued as to why that is the definitive answer. Well, because it's the thing I'm best at. Speaker 2 (13:09) And it's the thing I love the most. And yeah. Is Speaker 3 (13:12) this Speaker 2 (13:12) the thing you do the most? Oh my god, yeah. That's why I've had to give up all the Teddy because it takes up because I try and do a book a year and if you do that, that's just all your time. I love it. I love it honestly. I just adore it. Speaker 1 (13:23) What's that then? Page a day? Speaker 2 (13:26) That's how I should do it. Speaker 1 (13:28) I Speaker 2 (13:28) just typeset it myself. Just a page a day and then glue them in at the end of the day. What did you want to be when you were 15? Speaker 2 (13:37) A policeman, probably, I think is what I wanted to be, or a sports writer. Those were the two things I really wanted to be. What, a generic sport writer, or was Speaker 3 (13:44) there Speaker 2 (13:45) a sport in particular that you were like, oh, I love this? Yeah, I love football. I love golf. I love things like darts and snooker and things like that. So yeah, I just love sports, still love sport. And so yeah, that's the thing I would have loved to do. Speaker 3 (13:58) And a policeman. Yeah. Did you have a policeman in your family? My Speaker 2 (14:00) granddad was a policeman, yeah, in Brighton. and along that coast. So yeah, I fancy that, solving crimes and stuff. I think Speaker 3 (14:09) you would have made a really good CDO. A CDO? A custody detention officer. Those Speaker 2 (14:15) are my favourites. When you watch 24 Hours in Police Custody, because they absolutely don't, they take nothing from anyone. There's Speaker 3 (14:19) no bias. You're just here with me for the night. Yeah. Speaker 2 (14:23) How are you feeling? You feeling okay? Yeah, I imagine you are stressed. Yeah, you've just been arrested for murder. I get it. So you're feeling a little bit stressed. Okay, I just need to, you know, you've been arrested before. You have, yeah. I do recognise you, yeah. But this person can be screaming at everyone, flinging punches. As soon as they talk to the CDO, they're like, yeah, mate, it's John, John Edwards. Thank you, John. That's really kind of you. And so you've been arrested for murdering four people, is that right? Yeah, yeah, that was me, yeah. Allegedly. And then off they go again, and then they're swinging their arms at people again. I'd love Speaker 3 (14:54) to be Speaker 2 (14:55) a CDO. I think you'd be good. I think Speaker 3 (14:56) you'd struggle now. What do you think? Yeah, I don't think you'd be able to go back and... Speaker 2 (15:00) I think people would get used to it very quickly. I think there'd be like two seconds of, aren't you the guy from House of Games? I think the crime rates would go up. Speaker 3 (15:07) I think they'd be like, I want to get arrested just so I can go and speak to Richard. Can I get Speaker 2 (15:11) my book signed? Speaker 1 (15:13) Let's do that. I don't think that, yeah. I can't see many of them saying, House of Games. I just don't think the Venn diagram's there. You don't think that there's a, Speaker 2 (15:22) that offenders are watching House of Games? I Speaker 1 (15:25) don't think they are. I don't think they are. Is that a mad... That is such a mental insult. Speaker 2 (15:30) That is the Speaker 1 (15:31) worst thing you've ever said to a guest. I just don't think people are... Speaker 3 (15:34) You said Speaker 1 (15:34) to show, it was your baby, Speaker 3 (15:36) you came up with it. House of Games, yeah. I love House of Games. Yeah. Richard doesn't sound like it, mate. Guys, Speaker 1 (15:40) I love House of Games. I don't want this to be the thing. Oh Speaker 3 (15:43) my word. I love House of Games. I'm just saying Speaker 1 (15:46) that the majority of people who are going into custody, I don't think... Speaker 3 (15:51) Why are you Speaker 1 (15:51) looking at Speaker 3 (15:52) Georgia and Speaker 2 (15:52) Tom for help here, Speaker 3 (15:53) mate? I Speaker 1 (15:53) don't Speaker 3 (15:53) think Speaker 2 (15:53) they're Speaker 1 (15:53) watching Speaker 2 (15:54) House of Games. Speaker 1 (15:54) You have a conversation with us. I don't think they're watching House of Games. You've dug this Speaker 2 (15:56) hole yourself, mate. Speaker 1 (15:58) I think if you're out doing crime... Why not? You're Speaker 2 (16:01) not Speaker 1 (16:01) sitting there being like, right, let me get high score on Answer Smash. Speaker 2 (16:04) You don't think? I don't Speaker 1 (16:06) know. I don't think so. Speaker 2 (16:08) Jake, that's absolutely mental. Okay, I'm sorry. Speaker 1 (16:12) I am sorry. Speaker 2 (16:13) You just