Yours Truly Johnny Dollar: The Kirbey Will Matter (EP1309)

Great Detectives of Old Time Radio Volume 2|Mystery Audio Dramas

Insurance investigator Johnny Dollar travels to Lake Mojave Resort to investigate the suspicious death of Mike Kirby, which was initially reporte

Key takeaways

• Mike Kirby's death was staged to look like a rattlesnake attack, but Johnny found no snake tracks or impact site.
• Martha Woodbury, a niece of the deceased, is a professor of toxicology at Armand College.

Main topics

• Insurance investigation
• Inheritance dispute

Notable quotes

I have carefully spent every dollar I ever owned.

Conclusion

A clever subversion of the murder mystery genre where the motive is re

Transcript preview

Speaker 6 (0:00) The Speaker 1 (0:28) Welcome to the Great Detectives of Old Time Radio from Boise, Idaho. This is your host, Adam Graham. If you have a comment, send it to me, Box13 at GreatDetectives.net. Follow us on Twitter at Radio Detectives and become one of our friends on Facebook, Facebook.com slash Radio Detectives. Before we do get started, I do want to let you know that... We have two other great podcasts going. There's the old-time radio Superman show, LaserAndSword.com. Currently, Blaine Dowler's filling in for me this summer, but they're continuing on through the phony inheritance racket. And also The War, which I'll be wrapping up in just about a month and a half as we follow old-time radio about the last days of World War II. TheWar.GreatDetectives.net Well, it's time now for today's episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Dollar. From February 3rd, 1957, here's the Kirby Will Matter. Speaker 4 (1:39) From Hollywood, it's time now for... Speaker 3 (1:45) Johnny Speaker 4 (1:46) Dollar. Speaker 3 (1:49) Buster? Speaker 5 (1:52) Oh, Speaker 3 (1:54) Buster, how are things? Speaker 5 (1:55) No, Speaker 3 (1:58) but so help me, I'm going to one of these days. Is that what you called me about? Speaker 3 (2:06) Oh, sure. The sweet old fellow I met down at your boat dock. A guide or something? That's the one. Oh, sure. I remember him. How is he? What? Speaker 4 (2:30) In the exciting adventures of a man with the action-packed expense account, America's fabulous freelance insurance investigator... Yours truly, Johnny Dollar. Speaker 3 (2:52) Expense account submitted by Special Investigator Johnny Dollar at the Tri-State Life and Casualty Insurance Company Home Office, Hartford, Connecticut. Following is the account of expenses incurred during my investigation of the Kirby Will matter. As soon as I hung up on Buster, I lost no time in making the necessary plane reservation to Las Vegas and picking up a handful of American Express traveler's checks. That's item one on the expense account, a total of $320. Then I packed a bag, was about to take off, and the phone rang again. Johnny Dollar. Oh, Johnny, I'm glad I caught you. Speaker 3 (3:29) Oh, hi, Danny. Danny, I'm Speaker 4 (3:34) sorry, Speaker 3 (3:37) Dan, but I can't handle it. I'm about to catch a plane out of here. No, Speaker 2 (3:39) no, Speaker 3 (3:39) you Speaker 4 (3:40) listen. There may be a killing involved in what Speaker 3 (3:42) I'm going out... Speaker 4 (3:46) Sorry, Dan. Danny, Speaker 3 (3:52) I told you I... What? Mike Kirby? Okay, Danny, I'm on my way. Speaker 3 (4:13) It was 7.30 a.m. when the plane dropped me off in Las Vegas, Nevada, smack in the middle of the Mojave Desert. Even at that hour of the morning, the otherwise clear, clean air was filled with the cacophony of the city of chance. The centering clicks of the ball on the roulette wheel, the rattle and gallop of the ivories on the dice table, the endless drone of croupiers, the flat clank of the chuckaluck cages, the snap of cards by the blackjack dealers, the never-ending click of poker chips and silver dollars, and over it all, the interminable chunk and whir of the slot machine, day and night from one end of the town to the other. Fabulous. I grabbed breakfast, that's item two, then rented a car and headed south and east on Route 93 toward Kingman, Arizona. Then, just five miles short of that town, I swung right on 68 down toward Davis Dam, down to Lake Mojave Resort. Mile after mile of nothing but sun-baked rock and sand, Speaker 4 (5:10) sagebrush and Joshua trees, tumbleweed and cactus. Speaker 3 (5:13) And right in the middle of it, the clear blue waters of Lake Mojave. Buster Faber, who was General Factotum of the resort, was waiting for me. After a hearty greeting, he led me into the office and we sat down and got to work. Speaker 5 (5:26) Yeah, it was murder, all right, Johnny. Speaker 3 (5:27) Are you sure? Speaker 5 (5:28) Yeah. And by the way, I don't know how much you knew about Mike Kirby. Speaker 3 (5:33) Well, only that he seemed to be one of the fixtures around here. Was obviously well-liked. Speaker 5 (5:37) He'd been a businessman back east. Owned a string of restaurants, made a fortune. Uh-huh. About ten years ago, he retired. Did a lot of traveling all over the world, I guess. Oh, lucky man. Speaker 3 (5:47) Did he have any relatives, Buster? Speaker 5 (5:49) Oh, Speaker 3 (5:49) only some nephews and nieces. I see. Speaker 5 (5:53) Anyhow... A little over three years ago, he settled down here to spend the rest of his life just fishing, taking it easy. Speaker 3 (5:58) Can't think of a better place or way to retire. How old was he, Buster? Speaker 5 (6:02) 61. Didn't look it, though. Speaker 3 (6:04) No. If I remember right, he was pretty fit. Speaker 5 (6:07) He was. Speaker 3 (6:08) Well, I had the impression when I was here before that he was just a hired fishing guy, something like that. Speaker 5 (6:13) Oh, he used that as an excuse to meet folks. Half the time, he clean forgot to charge for his guide services. Speaker 3 (6:19) Accidentally on purpose, no doubt. Well, now you said... Don't Speaker 5 (6:22) rush me, Johnny. I gotta give you the background. Speaker 3 (6:25) Okay, sure. He Speaker 5 (6:26) kept saying over and over and over again how glad he was to be out from under a lot of responsibilities. And one day, about six or seven months ago, he suddenly transferred title to his boat, his motor, his fishing tackle, and his old beat-up Ford. Gosh. Speaker 4 (6:42) I Speaker 5 (6:42) know. I asked him at the time. He wanted to get them off his personal inventory. Why not give them to his relatives? Speaker 3 (6:48) Well, what did he say to that? Speaker 5 (6:49) That he didn't like them. Thought they were just waiting around for him to die so they could get their hands on his money. Speaker 3 (6:55) He Speaker 5 (6:56) just wanted to make sure that if anything happened to him, this stuff would end up with us on account of we'd use it and appreciate it. Also, Johnny, he plunked down $10,000 in cash and insisted that we take that too. Speaker 3 (7:09) $10,000? What for? Speaker 5 (7:11) His rent on his cabin for as long as he lived. Speaker 3 (7:13) Oh. Buster, did he leave a will of any kind? Speaker 5 (7:18) Well, I'm getting to that. Anyhow, last Friday afternoon, he went out fishing alone like we often did. And just before dark, one of the rental boats came in with two young kids. They'd seen old Mike's boat up on the beach in that big cove just before the power line crossed. They found Mike laying on the sand beside it, still as dead. Well, he came tearing Speaker 3 (7:40) in to report it, scared half out of their wits. Well, I sure hope you... Sure, Speaker 5 (7:43) sure. I grabbed Ham Pratt and a big flashlight. You remember Ham. Speaker 3 (7:47) Oh, yeah, the manager of the resort. Yeah. Well? Speaker 5 (7:50) Yeah, we... We found him there. And he... He was gone. Poor old fellow. Speaker 3 (7:59) Go on, Buster. Speaker 5 (8:01) Well, Ham took one look at him and... Rattlesnake, he said. Rattlesnake did it. You saw, by the way, Mike Look laying there. Speaker 3 (8:08) Bang marks? Speaker 5 (8:09) On his right leg, just above the ankle. And a big bruise on his head, like he'd hit a rock when he fell. Speaker 3 (8:15) But on the phone, you said you thought it was murder. And a minute ago, you said you're sure of it. Speaker 5 (8:20) So we put him in our boat, hitched his on behind, and brought him back here. We phoned Ted Harding of the Kingman Police Department. I remember him. Good Speaker 3 (8:28) man. Speaker 5 (8:29) Yeah, well, Ted Harding took one look, and he agreed with him. Poisoned from a rattler. Well, they took him into Kingman, and I telegraphed the relatives. Speaker 3 (8:36) But, Buster, now look, you... Then Speaker 5 (8:38) I got to thinking. There was something wrong. What do you mean? There are very few rappers in this part of the country because of the heat. They can't take it. If anybody'd know better than to fool one, it'd be old Mike. Speaker 3 (8:50) And they always sound a warning before they strike anyhow, don't they? Speaker