Giggling about cigars, cabaret, and compression socks

Giggly Squad

In this episode of Giggly Squad, hosts Paige and Hannah dive into personal anecdotes ranging from bizarre dreams about exes to physical ailm

Key takeaways

• Dreams about past relationships can be emotionally jarring, even when they involve terrifying scenarios.
• Physical injuries like back pain are exacerbated by poor healthcare access and confusing digital systems.

Main topics

• Bizarre dreams about exes
• Back pain and medical appointments

Notable quotes

"I laid in bed. I go, that fucking bitch. Not only did I dream about... the worst ex I've ever had in my life, he came up to me with a knife."

"You don't just go see a real doctor. You have to go to another doctor to get referred to a real doctor. It seems like a fucking pyramid scheme to me."

Conclusion

The episode ends on a lighthearted note with playful banter about futu

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:02) Sup, gigglers? Speaker 1 (0:03) Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Speaker 3 (0:05) Manifest that shit. Speaker 1 (0:06) We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me. Speaker 3 (0:15) Hello, my giggly-saurus rexes. Let me just say, I was like, Paige, can we get the party started? I need to complain about something. And she goes, I have to complain about you. With her long-ass finger, she goes, you. So now I'm scared, alone. No one's on my side. What did I do? What did I do besides Speaker 2 (0:32) pull out my own back? I'm going to tell you exactly what you did. On the pod last week, you said, oh, do you ever dream about exes? And I was like, I haven't dreamt about an ex in 10 to 15 years. Like, it's just not something that happens to me. I woke up this morning cursing. I laid in bed. I go, that fucking bitch. Not only did I dream about. the worst ex I've ever had in my life, he came up to me with a knife and said, if you don't... If you don't kiss me? If you don't stop, I'll kill you. Oh, stop what? Who knows? We don't know. Speaker 3 (1:12) Hopefully it's not one of those dreams that's like a Marvel movie where there's a new one every night and it like continues the plot. Maybe we'll see what happens. Well, Speaker 2 (1:20) you want to know what's crazy is the only way, the only reason I got out of the dream was something in real life woke me up. Kitty saved Speaker 3 (1:29) you. Speaker 2 (1:29) Like a sound like woke me up and I was like, oh my God, I was just having the weirdest dream. And then I didn't go back into it. Thank God. Speaker 3 (1:37) Why do I feel like it's worse when you dream good things about them? Like you're like, oh my God, he was so perfect. And then you have to like spend all day remembering all the worst memories. And then you're like, I could have done without that. Speaker 2 (1:49) No, I definitely went throughout my day today like, yeah, he is a sociopath. In every realm, he's fucking crazy. Speaker 3 (1:57) In every realm, he's ruining my life. Also, I do look like Angelina Jolie's cousin who like is just not, should not, wants to be a spy but like can't because she just like can't get her Speaker 2 (2:10) stuff together. But she keeps trying out. You know what's crazy is I didn't even notice you were wearing sunglasses. Speaker 3 (2:15) Because you see me as pure energy. Yeah, I'm just like, that is the vibe. That's whatever her journey is today. You see me by my aura colors. You don't process actual things, you see. I'm not in a good mood. Okay. Am I PMSing? Yes, but that's not it. That's not the reason. Speaker 2 (2:34) What was the reason? The reason was. Speaker 3 (2:37) look i as you guys know i pulled out my back but like somehow it's getting worse like did people know that did you say that last well i made fun of these old men playing tennis with me and then i pulled my back playing tennis with old men and i do have a l4 l5 situation i'm gonna say situation a little bulge disc if any of the gigglers are chiropractors and it was bad and i got a i got a massage yesterday and it was going well and then the lady like pushed my knee towards my chest like as a stretch and I saw God. Yeah. But like or Satan one of the two. And then I they left and I told Des I'm like I can't find a position that I'm not like shooting pain. Speaker 2 (3:23) Wait it like the massage like fucked you up more? Yeah. Oh like she pinched a nerve. She Speaker 3 (3:30) pinched the nerve like more and then I drug myself. Yeah. And I slept all yesterday. It was so peaceful. I highly recommend it. And then this morning, I got a chiropractor appointment. Made Des walk half an hour with me to the chiropractor. Because I'm not going to a doctor's appointment alone. That's so scary. We walked. Okay, so you're Speaker 2 (3:49) not Speaker 3 (3:49) that injured. Walking is good Speaker 2 (3:50) for your back. But I was limping. Hobbling. Yeah, hobbling. Speaker 3 (3:54) But I like the drama. So I let him get like... really far ahead of me and be like babe wait yeah Speaker 2 (3:59) i'm coming also because he always has a physical ailment and you're probably used to that so now you're like roles reversed yeah Speaker 3 (4:07) we get there place is closed perfect because it is labor day and i'm like then why did they let me book an appointment he's like who did you talk to on the phone i go i don't talk to people on phones i Speaker 2 (4:21) booked it online i Speaker 3 (4:22) booked online i clicked appointment On this day, they shouldn't have let me fucking click it. So then I didn't get a chiropractor. I'm still in pain and I'm alone and scared. Speaker 2 (4:34) Oh, that's why you were like, I'm ready to record the pod. So you never even went to your appointment. Well, you went and did, but you didn't have it. Speaker 3 (4:42) Also, then I'm realizing if I want to see like a real doctor, you don't just go see a real doctor. You have to go to another doctor to get referred to a real doctor. It seems like a fucking pyramid scheme to me. Have you ever tried to log into one of these doctor sites? Speaker 2 (4:55) They're Speaker 3 (4:55) made up. It's insane. If Speaker 2 (4:58) someone approaches me and says the word portal, shut... No, everyone's like, do you have the portal? Have you downloaded the portal? I'm like, shut your bitch ass up. Whenever I hear portal, I'm like, I'll kill you. Why Speaker 3 (5:11) are all the portals so different? None of them work. Can we just have a universal portal that is Speaker 2 (5:18) for medical reasons? Like, you know, when you applied to college and like, I think it was like when we got to college or when we got into high school, it was like one app. Remember it was called like the common app and Speaker 3 (5:31) it Speaker 2 (5:31) was like the same way you applied and like multiple schools would like take that application. Like, come on, just make it normal. Speaker 3 (5:41) because the biggest issue is you have to come up with a new username and password for all these sites and they all have different extents of like what kind of password one password said 14 letters i said 14 let no word is 14 letters what do you think about 14 letters and then i'm not i'm past the point i just no i'm so upset and then des was like okay well if it's is it an online chiropractor appointment today and i'm like let me check the portal and then it's like can you log into the portal and like Nope, Speaker 2 (6:07) can't log in, so we'll never know. And then it's like, can't remember your password, so you make a new password. And then they're like, can't be the old password. So I have like Speaker 3 (6:15) 400 passwords in 400 portals and my back still hurts. Actually, this is added to my back pain. Speaker 2 (6:21) The only thing I know about back pain, because during COVID, Gary threw his back out like so bad. He was like bedridden. He almost like went crazy. Yeah. And the number one thing that he did that he thinks fucked him up even more was like putting heat on it. Like that you should really be putting cold, not heat. Speaker 3 (6:41) Okay, that's good to know. That Speaker 2 (6:43) like a hot pack will make it more inflamed where colds will like shrink it. I Speaker 3 (6:49) was talking Speaker 2 (6:49) to Des about our friendship and I was like... Speaker 3 (6:52) Mine and Speaker 2 (6:52) yours or yours and Des's? Good question. Speaker 3 (6:57) I'm like, let's talk about us. Am I your best friend? Am I your best friend? No, but we were talking about Giggly Squad and I was like, Paige, because sometimes he likes checking in with Speaker 2 (7:04) where your head's at with stuff. Speaker 3 (7:06) Oh, no. That's a slippery slope. And I go, Paige is doing well. And I'm like, you know she wants to do Giggly Squad forever. Speaker 2 (7:13) Yeah. Speaker 3 (7:14) And he was like, really? I'm like, no, no, no. She jokes all the time about like... What else are we going to do? Who would I Speaker 2 (7:19) talk to about stuff going on in my life? Speaker 3 (7:22) And I was like, we're literally going to be like, welcome to Giggly Squad. This episode is sponsored by ARP. We're so excited to have you. And I'm like, she has a new line of dentures coming out. Like, we've planned. We have the future set. Like, don't worry about us. I don't think we Speaker 2 (7:36) give ourselves enough credit that, like, through different phases in our lives. And granted, we've only had this podcast for five, six years. So, like, six years, I feel like. There's not that much different. You'd be surprised. But I feel like we do talk about things. Like a perfect example is nipple hair. Who's out here talking about real stuff? Are you saying we're changing the game? No, I'm just saying like the day that we become mothers or like mothers of teenagers or like businesswomen that do like. the girls will relate we're growing together yeah Speaker 3 (8:18) we need to continue speaking our truth through all the stages des told me something crazy and i'm sorry for bringing him up twice this episode so far but he said something crazy to me because he told me he was like your grays are showing and i'm like you don't have Speaker 2 (8:33) to Speaker 3 (8:33) tell me that like i know i just like i don't look at them so you don't have to point them out anyway and he was like i can't wait Speaker 2 (8:42) for you to be like all gray Speaker 3 (8:45) But he didn't mean it in like a romantic way. He meant it like stylish way. Like he was like, it's going to look good when you're like all gray. And I was like, never. Speaker 2 (8:54) I'm really upset by that. Speaker 3 (8:56) No, he Speaker 2 (8:56) gets me Speaker 3 (8:58) like he knows I want it because I was like, I don't care. Like, I'll fucking grow up my grades. I don't give a fuck. And he's like, I know you're going to look so good. Great. Speaker 2 (9:05) Hannah. No, I'm not allowing it. OK, well, I'm glad. Is he the ray gun husband? I'm glad you two have that romantic moment. Get it the fuck out of both of your heads. It's not happening. Have you like, OK, Reba McEntire? redhead until older. You are going to be an older lady who is a redhead. You're Lucille Ball. Like, enough. You're not going gray. Speaker 3 (9:29) Well, now I need to because you don't want me to. Speaker 2 (9:32) You know who I saw on a plane recently who is actually fully gray and she does look good? When I was leaving Italy, a giggler came up to me and we were, like, chatting and she was like, don't look now, but Jane Fonda's over there. Oh! Speaker 3 (9:45) I would have puked. Oh! Speaker 2 (9:47) I literally, I don't, and I've seen multiple celebrities in airports and on planes. I don't think I whipped out my phone faster than to text my mom like, Jane Fonda's on my plane. Speaker 3 (9:59) Listen to this. We Speaker 2 (10:01) get on the plane. We sit down. Josephine texts me. Guess who I'm sitting next to? I go, if you say Jane Fonda, I'm going to freak out. She goes, Jane Fonda. Speaker 3 (10:09) Josephine doesn't deserve that. I'm sorry. Josephine doesn't deserve it. She doesn't even know. She doesn't even, like, she, no. You ready for this? She's 12 years old. Josephine Speaker 2 (10:17) texts her. Who did she text? She texted her like her boyfriend who's like aunt is friends with Jane Fonda. Oh, I take back Speaker 3 (10:29) what I said. Speaker 2 (10:30) The aunt texts Jane Fonda and goes, you're sitting next to like my nephew's girlfriend, Josephine. Jane Fonda turns to Josephine and goes. Are you Josephine? And she goes, yes, I Speaker 3 (10:42) am. Speaker 2 (10:42) Jane Fonda is a Speaker 3 (10:42) fan of Josephine. This is huge. Speaker 2 (10:44) Jane Fonda is a, which honestly, when you meet Josephine, you can't not be a fan of Josephine. She's Speaker 3 (10:51) like, I love your work. Your photos that you take a page in Venice were iconic. She was Speaker 2 (10:55) like, you're so pretty and so lovely. And then Jane Fonda watched the movies that Josephine was playing on her TV the whole flight home. Is Jane Speaker 3 (11:05) Fonda a giggler? No, Speaker 2 (11:07) they didn't get that far. Speaker 3 (11:09) Wait, Jane Fonda, if you watch her documentary, like not only she's an actor, but then she also like created the best like workout series ever, right? Yeah, she's like a big activist. She's really philanthropic. Why is philanthropic so hard to say? Is it because like our enemies are out to get us? Sorry, we're trying to help Speaker 2 (11:27) people. Philanthropic is like one of those words that when you throw it around, it's like... People respect you. Yeah. Wait, but what's the difference between philanthropic and then like... Philharmonic. They're too close. Remember we had a whole bit about the Philharmonic Symphony? Who Speaker 3 (11:45) was like, you know, we should do Philharmonic, but change it slightly. And then it's a lot of donating to charities. Speaker 2 (11:52) Wasn't it the story like a girl had an orgasm at the Philharmonic Speaker 3 (11:55) Symphony? Oh my God. Yeah. Speaker 2 (11:57) What a throwback. Speaker 3 (11:59) Oh my God. Well, philanthropy, Philharmonic, I don't know, some Latin thing in there. Speaker 2 (12:03) One thing before we move on from my... that flight to Italy there's something I've been doing on long flights and I'm not kidding it's changing my life and this is like some real AARP shit now any flight over really I've been doing it on every flight but specifically ones that are like over two and a half hours I've been wearing compression socks you're an athlete life-changing Speaker 3 (12:27) you're an Olympian here's Speaker 2 (12:28) the other thing I've been doing I haven't been eating on flights anymore Because my stomach gets so insanely fucked up when I get off the flight for like the next 24 hours. It's like bloated. Speaker 3 (12:42) So Speaker 2 (12:42) I've been doing both of those things. And when I get off the plane, I don't feel as like swollen and just like gross. See, Speaker 3 (12:50) I don't have the kind of self-control to be on a long flight that offers you a meal and to look in that lady's eye and be like, no, Speaker 2 (12:57) I won't take. I know. It's really hard. I know. It's really hard. I Speaker 3 (13:02) once was having like a full stomach bug and I was like, don't risk it being on a plane. And I was like, I Speaker 2 (13:09) can't say no to a free meal. You want to know what I've been doing, though? I've just been going a little bit earlier and getting so full at the lounge or like in the airport. Like in Italy, like I just ate before and then I was fine. If Speaker 3 (13:23) you want to nap, it's good to eat beforehand and then pass out. Yeah. Speaker 2 (13:28) So that's really been helping me. But I'm like, oh, my God, how old am I that I'm putting on compression socks? I was like, I literally put them on and I was like, I must add these to the newsletter. You Speaker 3 (13:38) know, I thought about it. Actually, I think I bought compression socks. That's the difference between me and you. Speaker 2 (13:43) Okay, Hannah, so I need to talk about something that's genuinely, and