that's not my fat experience! i'm fat AND well loved, b!tch! – ep. 172
Emotionally Online
In this candid and humorous episode of 'Emotionally Online,' co-hosts Maddie Dragsbaek and Meg Ruoco explore themes of fat acceptance, community belonging, and the emotional
Key takeaways
- Fatphobia is often weaponized in online profiles, but the way it's spelled ('fat-o-phobic') can be unintentionally humorous and highlight performative allyship.
- The emotional impact of missing out on inside jokes—especially viral ones like 'killing my frog' or 'now that's fish'—reveals a deep human need for belonging.
Main topics
- Fat acceptance and reclaiming identity beyond fatphobia
- The emotional weight of missing out on internet inside jokes
Notable quotes
'If you're fat-o-phobic, get out of here. I was like, fuck, that's awesome.'
'BRB killing my fucking frog. Killing my frog. Bye.'
Conclusion
The episode closes with a powerful reminder: true connection and self-acceptance come from
Transcript preview
Speaker 1 (0:00) I was on Hinge this morning and somebody liked me and on their profile it said they were like don't swipe if you are homophobic and they listed out a bunch of things and they did list fatphobia on there but they spelled it fat-o-phobic. I laughed for 45 minutes. Fat-o-phobic, nice to meet you. If you're fat-o-phobic, get out of here. I was like I love the effort, like I love that you're like fatphobes, no, you're not allowed here but they spelled it fat-o-phobic. I was like, fuck, that's awesome. That's really good. Automatic. You're obviously invited, so call me back. Okay, love you. Bye. Speaker 1 (0:52) What's up you guys and welcome back to emotionally online the weekly solar party for heart-to-hearts and hot gossip hosted by yours truly the one and only Maddie draw spec Co-hosted you know where you love her. It's Meg Ruoco. They don't call me Meg Ruoco host for nothing I saw someone in the submission box refer to you as Meg the co-host guard like the coast guard or something that's fun too okay i like that i kind of fuck with that i kind of fuck with that vibe they had it took me a second to get there but once i was there i was like i'm all in yeah i'm not i'm not anti that um have you ever felt fomo for an inside joke that wasn't yours before like literally every single day of my life because i was i'm was laying here the other night laughing my Speaker 1 (1:42) fucking ass off about somebody else's inside joke that i saw on tiktok and i can't stop thinking about it i almost want to like just jack it and be like oh it's just an internet thing no no it's my thing that i can say that funny thing that you said i said i'm gonna say it because there was this it was like screenshots of texts it was like this girl had ended things with a guy and he was crashing out in text was this local bar was this a local bar thing Speaker 1 (2:10) Maybe. I don't know. Okay. Sorry. Sorry. I interrupted you. I thought I was on the same page. I was building off of what you were saying. Sorry. Keep going. Keep going. He was crashing out and like threatening things because she had broken up with him. And he said that he was going to go kill his frog. And so her full friend group overtook it. And now whenever they're having a bad day or something goes wrong, they're like, fuck it. I'm going to go kill my frog. Speaker 1 (2:37) I'm like, no, that's so good. That's so good. BRB killing my fucking frog. Killing my frog. Bye. Are you fucking kidding me? I'm going to kill my frog. I have to kill my frog. Like it's so good. I wish that that was like lore that I was a part of so badly. It also is like so good in the way that it almost sounds like it is just a turn of phrase that has existed for a really long time. Killing my fucking frog. Where it's like, oh yeah, my day is so bad. I killed my frog. Speaker 1 (3:04) It's like, that sounds like that's existed forever. I absolutely feel that way. That is so funny. I was unreasonably high and got really sad that I wasn't a part of this. I was like, are you fucking kidding me? I can't believe people are out there killing their frog and I wasn't included in it and I wasn't there. No, that's how I feel. Like anytime I see like two of my coworkers laughing about something that I'm not a part of. Yeah. I'm like, Speaker 1 (3:31) What the hell are you guys talking about? What are you guys talking about? Guys, I'm over here. I'm literally over here. What are you guys doing? So like nobody thought to invite me. Nobody thought that I would maybe want to laugh too. Guys, me being left out is going to cause me to kill my frog. I'm going to kill my frog. Thanks a lot. I'm organically killing my frog now. That is totally separate. I came up with it independently. I actually bought a frog just so I could threaten to kill it. Speaker 1 (3:57) guys fuck i'm gonna kill my frog uh don't leave me out again or i'm gonna kill my frog i'm gonna kill my frog if you guys leave me out again that's so awesome i am loving that trend on tiktok where it's like this insane thing that somebody said and now it's become like our like friend group thing that we say where that was what i was referring to was the the um these texts between these girls where a girl and a guy were breaking up and he was basically like trying to send her off in some like i don't know dramatic way and he basically was like i'll always remember you at our local bar with a little green heart emoji Speaker 1 (4:39) And like, then it was just screenshots of her and her friends being like, remembering you at the local bar today. Like I'm at the local bar with the green heart every single time. I'm like, that's so good. I feel like the closest I've ever gotten to finding something like that through my own experiences is now that's fish. Now that's fish was a perfect repeatable phrase that had clear definitions. Now that's fish was. Speaker 1 (5:07) Excellent. I think I talked about this on the Patreon. Maybe I talked about it on the main show. I know that I was being very cryptic about it at the time, but now so much time has passed that I can be not cryptic about it. Yeah. That's awesome. I love when that happens. I was seeing this guy and the dates were going really well. I actually really liked him. And then he slowly started to ghost me. And you know, you can like feel that someone's ghosting you. Oh yeah. And you're like, but I didn't want to get in my head and be like, Speaker 1 (5:36) all anxious without knowing if it was affirmative or not. Right. So I was like, let me just text him myself and we'll see what happens. So I knew that he was hosting a tinned fish party over the weekend. I'm going to kill my frog over that. I texted him to ask him how the tinned fish party went. He responded only with photos of the fucking tinned fish. And I was so... Speaker 1 (6:06) annoyed by that that i just thumbs up the messages and did nothing else because i'm like i asked you like a thoughtful i think you're ghosting me yeah i text you asking how your fucking tinned fish party was you just send me random ass photos with no text answers i saw his text like an hour after so he sent photos and then let him sit there for an hour and i was like are you dead the fuck ass so i sent him back the thumbs up and i was like that's it i didn't say anything and then right when i sent him the thumbs up he texted me and said now that's fish And we never spoke again. So then it became like whenever the conversation is dead and there's nothing left to say. Now that's fish. Kind of perfect. But that's the closest I've ever gotten to killing my frog. Yeah, that's really good. We did something in a group chat that I'm in that we. Speaker 1 (6:58) I thought came from somebody else, but I later learned it just was like an original idea from our friend's head where we were talking about some guy. Can't remember which one, but someone who had done something stupid. And my friend texted saying. He must think twice. New text. Nay. Dot, dot, dot. New text. Think thrice. In all caps. And then in all caps in a new text, she just said, he's a loser. So now, now whenever anybody's pissing us off, we'll just go, he must think thrice. He has to think thrice. He's a loser. He's a loser. He's a loser. Said exactly like that. Yeah. Speaker 1 (7:47) I think she actually said you a loser. Just you a loser. L-O-S-A. Perfect. You a loser. No notes. Really good. I like that. I just want to be a part of every single inside joke ever. Because I see me off that I can't. I feel, I don't want to feel left out. I like being a part of stuff. But you know what? There's something uniquely funny to me about. I think like sibling inside jokes are my favorites. Oh yeah. Because you get to pretty explicitly leave out your parents, which is sometimes awesome. And we had, I mean, my siblings and I get in trouble for our inside jokes all the time, but they're one that my mom would get really fucking mad about. Sorry, Michelle, if you're listening, but Spongebob quotes run aplenty in my household. Oh, mine as well. Yeah. I love Spongebob. Speaker 1 (8:41) And my mom has a beautiful talent for making things that are not about her, about her. So when she would say things that like all of a sudden we would be talking about something in the conversation, like turn all of a sudden we're talking about Amichel. Me and my siblings would look at each other and be like, I lost something once. And it took her so long to catch on that we were doing it. And eventually we had to switch to an acronym. So it became I L S. Speaker 1 (9:10) Oh, it'll be like Ilso guys. Ilso. We've now dropped it. Cause it really turned into a big beef last summer, but it was like, it would happen so often that it was like, how many times can we say I lost something once in a singular day? It's like, mom's doing it again. I lost something once. Eventually she started to catch on to what we were doing. And she's like, it's not funny. It's a little funny. Yeah. My friends or my siblings and I have, um, A lot of those as well. And one of the things that has taken press, it's been an ongoing one, is we have a shared notes app of just random people that my mom will reference that she thinks we know. It's titled Regina colon random people she knows. And it's just a running list of who the people are with context for how we know them. Because she'll reference people. Speaker 1 (10:08) all the fucking time and be like oh don't you know this person and like this one number eight it just says first question mark so we don't know their first name last name larkin mother of maureen whom we met over dinner in ischia at le stouffe a tiny restaurant in laco amino near mezzatore hotel grew up in northbrook and also had saint bernard dogs right who Who is that person? And she will list them off as if they are our close personal friends. So we've just, every single time she does this now, we just pull out our phones. We write it down. There's like a bunch of random men that look identical that have been introduced to me through my parents. And there's one that they call Mr. Meat. And I, for the life of me, cannot internalize Mr. Meat's face. Speaker 1 (10:57) Even as recent as two weeks ago, we were in the car and they were talking about some guy named Sniv. And I was like, is that Mr. Meat? And they were like, no. Sniv and Mr. Meat are two different people and you've met both of them many times. Can we pause for a second? His name couldn't possibly be Mr. Meat in real life. I don't know why they call him Mr. Meat, but I don't know what his real name is. They call him Mr. Meat. he eats it he sells it got a big hog beats me beats me all i know is his name is mr meat Speaker 1 (11:31) Beat the meat. Beat the meat. Beat the meat. Well, that's about jerking off. Well, if I was Mr. Meat, that's what my slogan would be. Oh, okay. Sorry. I didn't know you were doing like a slogan thing again. Say it again and then I'll join in. Hold on. Hold on. Actually, let me do something where it's like, okay, everybody, you heard our opener. Now it's time for the main event. Mr. Meat. Beat the meat. Beat the meat. Beat the meat. Beat the meat. No, I actually, I have no idea why they call him that. Well, Mr. Meat, if you're listening, please let us know. And I don't know what he looks like either. But I have said this for years and I can't internalize it. But one time when my grandma was drunk, we was like at her like 80th birthday party and Mr. Meat was there. And I had. Speaker 1 (12:21) made a joke earlier in the day about how I didn't know who Mr. Meat was and I never wanted to know. Don't tell me. And then in the middle of the party, she brings Mr. Meat up to me and she's like, Maddie, this is Mr. Meat. And Mr. Meat's like, yeah. I know Maddie. I've been around her whole life. And Nanny's like, no, Maddie said she didn't know you. And I was like, Nanny, keep it under wraps. Nanny, be cool. Be cool in front of Mr. Meat, Nanny. He's not supposed to know that I don't know him. Be cool in front of Mr. Meat. Yeah, my grandma's also given us a lot of random phrases that are kind of similar to killing my frog. Yeah. Wago boof, which we've talked about on the show before. Wago boof is awesome. Wago boof was the best. Wow, maybe that's where boof originated. Speaker 1 (13:03) Whoa. Holy fuck. Did it? I didn't even realize that. That's why it existed in your brain. Oh my God. It might have. Yeah. Because WegoBoof came shortly before. Yes. WegoBoof started in like October of last year maybe. Whoa. And WegoBoof is of course a synonym for bad. Right. Speaker 1 (13:29) Obviously. Oh, God. This day has been so Wago Boo from killing my frog. You didn't get the Wagoo beef. You got the Wago Boo. Yeah. Speaker 1 (13:42) I've been watching Adults recently. Okay. I've been watching Adults season two. And don't get me wrong, I like it. I watched the whole thing. I liked it. I think these actors... I've heard good things. Yeah, I think these actors have good chemistry with one another. I enjoy it. But I'm noticing something happening with these friend comedies. This new wave of I Love L.A. and overcompensating. adults and not suitable for work which is the mindy kaling show that nobody watched but i did um and i was trying to kind of like put my finger on what exactly it was that felt like off to me and i saw a tweet the other day from someone whose name i'm forgetting so i apologize but they said like all of these shows there's something that feels so plastic about all of these shows lately and they said it's like every character knows they're telling a joke yeah and i was like oh Speaker 1 (14:47) that's what it is yeah like for as joke heavy as 30