8: Trisha Paytas and I talk addiction, dating old men, brands that rejected us & writing memoirs - Ep.8

Brand Safe - Tana Mongeau

Tana Mongeau and Trisha Paytas open up about their journeys through fame, addiction, and reinvention. They discuss the shift to being 'brand safe,' past rejections from major brands, and the emotional toll of public scrutiny. Their conversation dives into personal growth, healing from toxic relationships, and the power of memoirs as redemption.

Key takeaways

• Embracing 'brand safety' helped reclaim creative and financial freedom.
• Past trauma and public shaming shaped their resilience and boundaries.
• Rejection from brands fueled their determination to rebuild their image.

Transcript preview

Tricia Paitis, the woman, the myth, the legend, the generational icon. We are so brand safe. We're so brand safe, congratulations. Oh my God. I am like genuinely beaming about this podcast episode today because this is, you know, when something's just in your mind for so long and you're finally doing it. Yes, it's so it's like surreal because you have so much equipment, it's like surreal because you have so much equipment, it's like so crazy. you have like a full on crew with you like it's so wild to see how do you feel back to podcast day I mean I feel so grateful and like obviously I did a lot in Hawaii and now I'm really integrating it into my life in LA and you are such a huge part of my life in LA even just this room we were originally going to do the foyer upstairs and then obviously you have three beautiful children who were catching a vibe in the foyer and I'm not about to fuck that up and the construction and just so many things hustling hustling and which is awesome that's my favorite thing about the Tricia universe it's similar to mine in the sense that something's always going on so we decided we would do it in the glam room and as I'm sitting here I was like honestly everything kind of happens for a reason sitting here in this glam room because I feel like this is a place a that's not online a lot but also be that like you and I spend so much time in and some of my favorite memories with my favorite memories with you are in this is always the room that we change in it's where we like really talk our cameras like if we're pissed at someone or like let me not use that example but like if we have serious tea yeah no there's definitely venting that but that's so much better that's why you have friends and not do it online yes but you're not messy and then you're brand safe oh my god that just made me want to talk about two things at once obviously I want to get into the like brand safe era we are both in our brand safe era and I feel like you are the only person who's naming this podcast I could see how a lot people can be like that's silly like if they don't you are one of those people if not the only person in my life who resonates in such a deep level of what it means to be brand safe yeah I think for so long we both were like I mean you would say I would say it's just like not brand safe like we're never gonna work with brands like whatever you know what I mean so it's like manifesting that it just kept us further away from like where we need it wanted to be and then yeah it's the switch the decision and I don't even know for me to work with brands was more just so I wouldn't die, you know what I mean? I was just like, and then it in turn brought brand deals, I suppose, yeah. And I almost feel like most people, like, you know what I mean? Like we both went through that where it's like, I'm gonna die and I really want to like protect and foster this life and I'm gonna make this switch to live for this greater life that I believe is going to happen, like, you believe is going to happen. And then that hasn't happened that hasn't happened yet that hasn't happened yet that I believe is going to happen, that hasn't happened yet that I believe is going to happen. And then, that I believe is going to happen. And then, that I believe is going to happen, that hasn't happened, that I believe is going to happen, that hasn't happened, that I believe is going to happen. And then, that deal which is like it's God tier to me okay? Chili's is kind of epic. It's some God tier shit. So brand say. Yeah. Chili's too is too is like, what's cool about these brands too is like obviously they're not as like fearful I think like 10 years ago either obviously in New York as I was like nut so online like acting erratic and stuff like that but I also think they like lean more into just what people want on social media you know what I mean and they're not such an interesting thing that I've never thought about and like what that does to your psyche because like for so long yes like every brand was literally afraid of me utter fear other other fear utter fear at whatever brand it was even down to just sending me like PR yeah even if it wasn't like working with you it's like we're not even gonna send her like that free moisturizer because we're so afraid of her. I'll do you one more I had a company tweet take this down it was an underwear company I won't say who it was like I loved like oh I loved oh my oh my oh my oh my oh my oh my god at that monthly underwear me and Moses like love and they're like please remove this we have no affiliation with you whatever and it was like literally just me tagging like oh my god my love my new at and they love my new at and they're like take it down you know what's funny is they were the first brand I ever tried to work with I know exactly who you're talking about and they shut me down I tell you they were the first brand I ever worked with in 2010 yes do you remember those and I remember those and I remember those and I remember those and I remember those and I remember those and I remember those and I remember those a similar name that did the same thing and I remember being on their begging every brand. Yes and it was so easy like Juulment, she meant the underwear company like you would just apply and they would like send it to you and you would get like maybe like 5,000 dollars and I had like 500,000 subscribers and I remember it was like 5,000 to do these like shoutouts which was it's insane to me and I remember I remember this too that I remember this too that's I remember this too that's like it is so fun and there are money to go around for all the influencers. They have a new one called a genteo. I feel like people are almost bringing that back where they're like having the interface for the brands, but that's so funny that you and I both have like a core memory of this brand being like no no no I'm we're afraid down. I don't know how to explain that then like almost moves into how people treat you obviously like a long time ago and cancel you and I talked about like an influencer basically telling me like I'm horrified to be seen with you and like that person was one of that person was one of many. I didn't it was because of my own actions that these influencers were literally telling me to my face like I'm horrified to be in a photo or a video with you or like whatever but that stuff starts to imprint on you you know where you're like everyone is afraid to be seen with me and everyone is afraid to work with me and then you almost want at least me I wanted to like beat people to the punch where I was like no no one's gonna sponsor me like I get it you're doing charity work I'm gonna make a wish child thanks for being seen with me like did I was overcompensating I was overcompensating I was overcompensating for that but the more Yeah, that is the vicious cycle. I was, yeah, we were the exact same in that way too. And I think it's just like you shouldn't talk about yourself that way, you know what I mean? Even if you are, if you do feel like, even if that's true, right? People are saying I can't be seen with you, right? And just like, well, that's on them, that's like not on me, you know what I mean? And just like, well, that's on them, I'm like, not on me, I'm going to be in a erratic, I'm going to be erratic, I'm going to be erratic, I'm going to be erratic, I'm going to be erratic, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm going to be even if it's trying to defend myself if someone is acting erratically as like oh that's like something I don't want to like get involved I think that I had an error where I was like I offended where I was like I can't believe these people don't want it when looking back it's like no fucking Sherlock you know what I think it is is the transition out of it I think is what makes it frustrating because people will like maybe it was at the time. can have hesitancy which I totally expect I think in like 10 or 20 years we're like okay actually she's she's better now you know there's definitely the trickle down economics where there's still like the the certain people who are afraid and like rightfully so I don't I try not to get offended but even recently yeah there's this brand there's this new brand is launched by an influencer that like everyone loves everyone loves this brand and I ended up hearing through the grapevine because they were kind of like gifting one in my house like Amari and Ashley and Isabella and everyone's getting invited to these events and like they're good ones and like people are at them and I hear it through the grapevine that the CEO of the company essentially told everyone at the company like never send to Tana like never this person yes and I'm friends with this person so I was like damn like you're swiping up on my story saying like you're glowing girl and like I know your tea and stuff and you're behind my back when and it's like I don't even want your candle I don't even want you fuck you and you're whatever it's not candle but like just I don't even like fuck you and I got so offended but then I had to like dial back and be like you know what like I did a lot of things and this is not the direction that they but then they will give to people who are like more problematic in today's current date than I am now and the like friend of it all is what hurt my feelings where I'm like and that's just some LA shit or someone's like you're you're telling everyone at your and your employees are narks your employees went and told us essentially just knowing like not to be like run your business better girl right but maybe yes don't be so messy like and also sending it to people in your house like obviously your friend circle like that is weird and a friend that is like that would be the hardest I don't think I've ever experienced that I mean I've had some shady people in my life but that's that's bad as someone's acting like your friend then they're like she's the worst yeah or yeah or just like we want we want no affiliation with no affiliation with no affiliation with The math is not a math thing to me, but at the same time I also like a significant I understand that's I think it's also like if it's in your circle someone's like Moses come to a but not Tricia I'd be like but that is me like that's an extension of me like we're all the same like that's what's like that's crazy like that to me it's crazy this was my crash out this was my crash out you guys all yeah during brand say you need like a tangent you guys like a tangent extension I also 100% I also think that was like Right. How about you just how about your employees just don't tell people that like you the CEO who's also my friend said that? Like maybe we just like make little little tweaks to how this how this happened. I don't need the product you don't it's your brand. Right. End of the day you don't want me to be gifted your product or work with you or come to your events or whatever that's fine but like here that is ignorance. Yeah, I never understand either when other influencers would be like this to make me feel about like feel about like feel like... that is a big myself. That is a big myself. too much it happened one time with the it like I remember being like it hurts so bad that's why I was like so angry at the person that he said was about me but I should be angry at that person because I was like why did you tell me this like just to like make me feel bad about myself and I swear that's such a thing about LA where people are like yeah and so and so and so said this about you but like I had your back and it's like no I know you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't. I know you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't. I know you didn't you didn't you didn't you didn't. I know you didn't to be out of that part of LA. Like I say it from a far. Yeah. And I feel like you and I have been having like, I don't know, just like a lot of deep conversations off camera on not love line lately, like in between shots. My last one was like an hour. I was like we need to get back to filming, we rush at the end. We really will have like an hour off-camera, off-camera podcast in between episodes sometimes just because of life, and there. And like I feel like we've been having we've been having a lot of like, I guess and like how far we've come. Well you've always been a good friend I always say that like you've been friends with everyone since you were like 10 right like was Isabella 10, Tamari like 12 like you keep friendships you've always been a good friend but I also think that like I let in pee you know I made mistakes in friendship where I kept people for too long you know I was jumping oceans for people who wouldn't jump puddles for me or like maybe just clout into that brew like and I feel like I'm finally at the place now and I think you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like you're like that's okay and you're putting up with less and boundaries and stuff but I feel like you have made strides since we met because I feel like for a long time the word friend to you even yeah I never said it was like you would avoid the word friend at all cost you know yeah it hurt people's feelings I'd be like well I'm really friends we're like waitans as and people to like be so up so I'm like I hate yeah I hated the word friend because it's like I trusted nobody. Yes and it was like I You've come strides on that with me which I think is like just and it's very sweet to me like watching you so he be like wait Tana and I'm our friends and I'm like I'm like I'm like I get emotional I'm like oh because it makes me so emotional because I know that it's not just you choosing to say a word or like it was ever coming from a bitchy place before it was coming from this place of like protecting yourself you didn't want to like say Tana's my friend because the last time you just feel so stupid you're always like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm Yes, but you have like made such strides and I like love seeing you. You know how like getting your pink back and like seeing someone in your feminine or phrases? I don't know what the phrase is. When you and I are like friending out when we're like having a friend moment and like I see you just like let your guard down and like you know tell me a secret or like just like confide in me for something or like or ride for me even recently there was a moment where somebody asked Tricia something about me and my business that like she knew damn well about. Like I think it was I think someone was just straight up asking like does she have a podcast name or like does she something yeah and you were like I don't know yeah and like she knew damn well because they knew and I was like they knew and I was like how do you know but then like she take I'm like okay I was like I say like I never want to slip up ever I was in general when it comes to you I'm like no idea you know what I mean but that's some liar I'm a lie I'm a like I'm a like I'm a like I'm a you know what I'm a I'm a you know what I'm a I'm a I'm a I'm a you know what I'm a you know what I'm a you know what I'm a I'm a you know what I'm a you know what I'm a I'm a you know what I'm a you know what I'm a I'm a you know what I'm a I'm like that's some I'm like that's some I'm like that's some I'm And it's just very cute to see the progress that you've made and then obviously I get so angry we had a day the other day where like I don't know we were just talking you were being kind enough and open enough vulnerable enough to like divulge some like previous friend traumas that you had had I was saying to you before we started podcasting it's almost like when you date someone you're my significant other but like when you date someone and you find out someone in the past cheated on them and then you're like oh my god I'm so heartbroken that this happened to you happened to you before me before me because like I'm live it. Like I was in tears in the car screaming with McColl because I was like I don't know just the way people have made you feel like they can take everything away from you. Yeah. Or the way that people have made you feel like they're only there when it's good and then like wouldn't be there like I was texting you I was like I would bury the fucking body with you you know like and I don't ever want that like we're knocking on wood you know but I'm not bearing anybody. We're not bearing any bodies but the metaphorical body you know what you know what I'm not bearing anybody you know what you know what you know what I'm not bearing anybody you know what I'm not bearing anybody you know what you know what I don't I don't I don't prison first and it's like they point to Noah or something. Oh like Haley back and know I'm back. Yeah they all pointed to Noah like this in an age while like what? Yeah. That is okay yes I don't literally mean a body I really don't but just that like I would be there during the fucking bad. No you are and you are you are you are you are but it's just like you've made such strides when it's just like you've made such strides when it's like you've That's trusting because I you share really like vulnerable things and it's super trusting. Yeah I've learned to like guard myself so much more because I just don't want anyone to use anything against me ever you know and it's so real when every time you thought you had a friend they immediately like used everything that you ever vulnerable shared against you that is something that like scars you and it's almost like I've even had that and it's like you have to re almost retrain your brain you know that the next person is not the last but I also understand getting to a point where you I am learning to open myself more because people are so nice and like people I've seen repeatedly and stuff like that in my life like there people like there are people that are rooting for you would actually want the best for you and I just am so not used to that so the more I see people and the more like consistent people are I'm like you know what let me open myself up again to like friendship yeah yeah but it's also a different place of life I think both you and I did a lot in the influence or space with a lot of people you and you and I are similar where it's we're friends you know like like if we're spending all this time together like and it is such a fine line because like so much is on camera and then like you and I I feel like are our genuine selves on camera so we're able to like genuinely bond with someone even if we are on camera yeah because we film our practice with like eight hours straight so that's like so intense it's like the most intense like hang out session ever and yeah I feel the same way it is crazy when you film with someone so much and then like literally so disposable like What do you mean my whole life just got like flipped upside down and I never see these people? It's very weird. And a lot of creators just don't feel that way. Yeah, when it's like cameras are off it's like they shut down or it's like yeah it's really interesting. But it also that I guess that comes down to those people kind of putting on like a persona. Yeah whereas I don't feel like you or I have a persona necessarily. Yeah, especially with what we're never doing a poker interview because we're literally. I saw one I forgot what I was okay go ahead because I did see what I love this interview I love your side quests because honestly like I do see you popping up in like the most random interview settings I'm like I love this yes I just lost the tournament I was so fucking pissed I was like fine let me let's do let me get something out of today some content they wanted to do it interview after you lost yes I was so upset I was so upset I was like I think it was 500 like 500 500 okay it's not bad 45 out of 50's not bad no no no I whatever the number was I was the absolute last the first last the absolute last the absolute last the absolute last I gave my money to Zach justice and I walked out of the building well that's not everything but kind of everything that did the first out because then you can like go about your day yeah it's gonna waste it is true it is true it is true I think it's better to be 54th than like 25th because then you're still Tana persona on and I was like really thinking about it I was like I really don't like there might be the moments where you like you hone into that side of you and like really played up and stuff and I feel like you're the same like who we are on camera is who we are off camera a thousand percent oh my god you tell stories as if you were watching a story time like the way you tell stories in real life you talk with your hands you have so much like drama you're just like personified you obviously you're not yelling in a grocery store but like they want you to be like but say with Chili's you know what I mean like like you're saying the Tricia bullet points the iconic things but like those come from genuine moments yeah and you just like acted up I suppose then yeah you play a little more of a character but it's all it's all genuine it's all yeah but yeah but finding friends in this industry is hard because of that sometimes like other people it's not like those moments weren't those moments were contrived for there that's always bizarre to me that's always bizarre to me that's always bizarre to me but were pretty authentic to who they were on camera but yeah I guess even like Shane though was very different off camera than he was on camera like he'd be so wild and saying like wild like all the stuff that came out obviously like his jokes and stuff like that were like insensitive like I just he never did that privately yeah I mean and I wasn't around for the era of him on video so it was just like so he was kind of like a different person I suppose maybe for better he was like a better he was like a better person off camera you know but I guess a lot I guess a better person off I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I guess I you know the tea I was like debating telling you I was with Ashley before I had left the house and I was like I don't even want to bother Tricia with like whatever is going on this thing that's going on in my personal life but like whatever I was saying that I love but then I was saying to Ashley I was like but she's just the type of person that you like walk through the front door and she's like how are you and you're not gonna like lie like you create such an environment where it's like what's happening that's like what's happening that's like the nicest because I love trauma dumping on people and not everyone loves it. 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You put me on to something the other day where you were like, because you were talking about how like, obviously and canceled, and canceled I have the name kind of be Tanojo cancelled the podcast would come up first before like all this dumb shit I'd done whereas this is the opposite where like if a brand looks up Tanojo the first thing is brand safe and like I'm manifesting that that like brings me home I think even the opposite I think brands will be like brand safe creators and you'll be the first one to pop up which is so funny like my life is Ava like talking about like sex that they had sex it was like such a crazy thing and they're like because they were like 20-s but they were pretend to be in like high school not like pretend but like make high school videos even though they were like 20 and so I think they just like had that audience I just thought of them as like kids so they're like I was so scared talk about dating or sex and like the minute they started doing it was like or anything real life like surgeries or surgeries or like you and I'm trauma dumping and swearing and talking about all the crazy stuff but at a time where that was not not it welcomed yes like and now almost the internet wants that authenticity from yeah no for sure and I like it's interesting to see people try and go that route yes it's a balance because I see some people try and be like so like so much I guess I'm just older too like when people talk about their sex life so openly like oh my god like keeps some stuff for