Bachelorette Fails, Wedding Night Confessions & Marriage Advice That Works w/ Val & Kaytlyn

Always Here

Val and Caitlin join Abby on a special episode of 'Always Here' during her maternity leave, diving into candid discussions about bachelorett

Key takeaways

• Bachelorette parties can go wrong in unexpected ways—like a bride falling off a boat unnoticed for minutes.
• Open communication with parents before marriage is crucial; many women wish they'd had those talks earlier.

Main topics

• Bachelorette party horror stories
• Wedding day surprises and family dynamics

Notable quotes

"If you want to have a really big and expensive bachelorette party, you should be paying for a majority of it."

"My mom tried to show me her lingerie the day before I got married. I said, Kim. I beg of you."

Conclusion

The episode ends with warmth and connection, emphasizing the power of vulnerability, friendship,

Transcript preview

Speaker 3 (0:00) We have two special guests today. The famous Val. Yeah. And our other girl, Caitlin. You taught me how to mop my floors correctly. Mopping the floor. You know, soap. Speaker 6 (0:08) Who would have thought? Speaker 3 (0:10) This girl said bride fell off the boat and we didn't know for a few minutes. A few minutes is an eternity Speaker 6 (0:15) in Speaker 3 (0:15) the water. If you want to have a really big and expensive bachelorette party, you should be paying for a majority of it. Speaker 6 (0:21) 100 % agree. My mom tried to show me her lingerie the day before I got married. I said, Kim. I beg of you. Speaker 5 (0:27) Two weeks before my wedding, my mom goes, do we need to talk about anything? You're like, I got it. I was like, you should have done that 14 years ago. Speaker 3 (0:42) Well, thank you guys for being here and filling in on maternity leave. Well, thanks for having us. Yeah. Extending Speaker 5 (0:47) that thing out. As long as we can. Yeah. We've been Speaker 3 (0:49) talking about this for a long time. And like, what are we going to talk about with Val and Caitlin? And like, when are we going to have them on the show? So I feel like we have a really fun. When you guys were prepping for the episode today, did you feel like, oh, yeah, this was good? Or like, what is this? I mean. Are you excited about the topics today? Speaker 6 (1:04) Yeah. Yeah. I think it's going to be fun. I feel like we always have like fun combos. So I'm like. Let's just record it. Why don't we? Speaker 5 (1:12) I've always got something to say about Speaker 6 (1:13) about anything and everything and I'm like wow we get to have like uninterrupted conversation now like that's really spiffy. Speaker 3 (1:21) Well perfect. Well here we are here to share the hope and the hard with heart and humor and that's typically how we start our podcast off. Did you guys do a hope and hard? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I can start since I'm not going to throw you guys in the hot seat. Tell me everything that's hard in your life at the moment. So this might be a little TMI, but I did start my, I'm on my period, ladies. Remember, Speaker 6 (1:42) your Speaker 3 (1:42) body's working. I know. You're healthy. Super healthy. So that's hopeful. My hard is I'm still using this FlexDisc thing. Okay. People chime in the comments because this thing is messy. And that's been hard. Like my floors are dirty, you know? So, and it's just always a mess. Like I'm out in public or at church and I'm like, Abby's Speaker 5 (2:02) like talking to me through the stalls. I got Speaker 3 (2:04) blood on my hands. No, literally. I'm like, what are you supposed to do? How do people do this? And my other heart is I'm pretty sure I'm going to be, when does this episode come out? Three weeks. Okay. Yeah. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be on my period when we're in Italy. Perpetual. Oh, dang it. Perpetually on your period. Just forever. I know, which for the obvious is very annoying, but then also for the fact that I'm just going to be really messy on my trip. Oh, that's... You know? Yeah. That's... Speaker 4 (2:29) Just... switch to tear bonds for the trip i think yeah Speaker 6 (2:33) that's what i was thinking i'm like i would just do it i Speaker 3 (2:36) know but honestly the tear bonds hurt Speaker 6 (2:38) yeah really after Speaker 3 (2:39) not using them for so long i used them last month when i went home is this tmi no okay this is a girl's podcast this Speaker 6 (2:46) is for the girls we girls need to know Speaker 3 (2:48) this is how we're kicking it off whenever Speaker 5 (2:50) you're telling me about all this i was like i had no idea yeah so we need to know thank you that's encouragement that's there you go there you go yeah Speaker 3 (3:01) i feel like when i went back i used tampons when i went home because i got really frustrated with the mess of the desk and it hurt after a couple days after two days it felt really really Speaker 6 (3:10) yeah Speaker 3 (3:10) sensitive so I don't want to go back to that. A lot of people have done talking about period underwear. Have you seen ads for that? Yeah. I don't understand how that works. Just free Speaker 6 (3:19) bleed that right into that right into them panties. I don't know. Speaker 3 (3:22) It's like a Speaker 6 (3:22) pad that just Speaker 3 (3:23) smells all day. Speaker 1 (3:24) No Speaker 5 (3:24) I mean I do feel like it would stink. Yeah and I feel like it's really limits what you can wear. Yeah. Like you can't wear that kind of underwear with everything. Nope. Yeah. Speaker 6 (3:35) that's yeah no workout clothes for you Speaker 5 (3:36) no i know i have Speaker 6 (3:37) none advice i am a tampon girly through and Speaker 3 (3:40) through i have none advice for that dang it a lot of people message me saying that they love the period underwear and i've been getting served a lot of ads i'm very tempted to get a little bit it just maybe i need to talk to her about it more and get more of the logistics because you're like does it smell yeah Speaker 6 (3:55) do we wear more perfume that day what Speaker 3 (3:57) happens because even when you wear a pad all day i'm like it Speaker 6 (4:00) gets oh it gets you yeah well that's half the reason that postpartum like has that special smell where you're like i'm just i'm an onion farmer literally Speaker 3 (4:09) and this Speaker 6 (4:09) isn't it right i've never been able to put that smell like you're just milky and bloody and it's like that smell and you're like it's just i'm an onion farmer it's just you smell stale and sour yeah yeah Speaker 5 (4:24) yeah like like is that what happened yeah dry Speaker 3 (4:28) blood so yeah that's kind of been i've just been navigating that this week which isn't bad but yeah i've just been on my mind constantly i'm like am i leaking am i yeah how are my pants i'm wearing brown i think we just bring back that can you Speaker 6 (4:51) check me remember that can you check me yeah Speaker 3 (4:53) have you seen that trend where it's like the girls ask the guys they quiz them on yes thanks and that's one of them what does that mean what does can you check me mean Speaker 5 (5:03) can you check me yeah we're all like 13 starting our period oh Speaker 6 (5:07) can you check me it's almost like hey i'm just letting you guys know i'm on my period can you please check me so comical i'm Speaker 3 (5:14) so Speaker 6 (5:14) mature Speaker 3 (5:14) i'm Speaker 6 (5:14) so Speaker 3 (5:15) mature yeah so those are my hopes and my hearts well i don't really give a solid hope but Speaker 6 (5:20) There it is. There it is. Hope we will one day figure Speaker 3 (5:23) it out. It's honestly not been the greatest week. I'm like, it's Wednesday. Yeah. So Speaker 6 (5:28) we're Speaker 3 (5:29) getting through it. There's so many things that I'm like, I don't want to share that. I don't want to share that. Speaker 6 (5:33) Yes. Next week. That's good. Next week. Don't be a hope for sure. I Speaker 2 (5:37) pulled Speaker 6 (5:37) the trip. The trip could be a hope. Yeah. I'm going to look forward to. Yeah. Speaker 3 (5:42) something exciting i'm Speaker 5 (5:42) gonna Speaker 3 (5:42) go shopping this weekend that's Speaker 5 (5:45) the Speaker 3 (5:45) help excited for that yeah yeah i love that yes my Speaker 5 (5:48) hope dave and i celebrated nine years our nine year anniversary yesterday Speaker 6 (5:52) what'd you guys do not a thing i love that that is nine years i'll tell you what Speaker 5 (5:58) we've we've been saying the last three years we're like 10 years that's when we're gonna like do it you know So, I mean, we like said some nice things to each other. Love that. Love that. We said 10 years, we're going to Speaker 6 (6:12) go big. I think you should. That's kind of where we're at too. Like we're at nine years too. And I'm like, Hey, 10 years. Let's go. Let's do Speaker 2 (6:20) something cool. I Speaker 6 (6:20) don't know what, but cool. So I want a piece of jewelry on 10 years. Like, yeah. So I'm like, so start saving up those pennies. Speaker 5 (6:27) Save up those pennies. I know. He asked me last night, he goes. if you could have had a snapshot into our life nine years ago do you think you would have believed it and i was like i don't even think i could have like comprehended it you know what i mean like when you're married you've got kids you're like just your young self like you can't even really imagine it Speaker 6 (6:46) totally Speaker 5 (6:46) well i feel Speaker 6 (6:47) like it's even hard now to be like i am older than 23. well yeah you know what i mean like that's one of those things where i'm like i'm a teen mom i know i'm walking around target i'm just a girl i'm just a girl i have literally said that to my children before it's like i'm just a girl this is my first time too i don't know i know yeah i don't know what i'm doing i'm just a girl but Speaker 5 (7:06) here we are amazing i love Speaker 6 (7:08) that Speaker 5 (7:09) my heart guys i gave myself gym flu you ever Speaker 6 (7:12) heard that no I've been complaining to you for weeks about how I'm tired about Speaker 3 (7:17) it. Speaker 6 (7:17) Yeah, Speaker 5 (7:17) but then yesterday, I'm outside with Abby after burn, and I'm like, I don't feel very Speaker 3 (7:22) good. Speaker 5 (7:22) Oh, no. Speaker 3 (7:23) We were looking at each other because we kind of talked about hanging out. I couldn't look Speaker 5 (7:26) Abby in the eye because I was like, I am going to throw up or pass out one of them, too. Yeah, we were both struggling. Yeah. And I was like, I don't Speaker 3 (7:33) want Speaker 5 (7:33) to hang out. Speaker 6 (7:34) I'm sorry. Yesterday was brutal for sure. I Speaker 5 (7:37) had to go home and take some ibuprofen. Really? lay down yeah and it never got better like i went to bed at like 7 30 i was like i'm achy and my stomach hurts and i think something's wrong like i was like i have the flu then yeah dave's like i think you have the gym flu it's like Speaker 4 (7:57) a Speaker 3 (7:57) thing i've Speaker 5 (7:57) never heard of this i've never heard of this i just looked it up Speaker 4 (7:59) it says temporarily flu-like symptoms such as nausea chills body aches and fatigue that happen after intense exercise it comes from over training pushing your body past its current recovery limit i know dehydration low blood sugar and muscle inflammation you need to be eating all those things are mean right now yeah five Speaker 6 (8:18) months well what you were saying that you had to need like chat said you had to have like 2600 calories yeah i asked chad gbt last week like hey Speaker 5 (8:26) give me give me help give me help me like how many calories should i be eating and give me some ideas of like a day of eating and they were like 26 to 28 hundred calories and i was like that's a lot Speaker 6 (8:37) i'm eating at a constant state at that point Speaker 5 (8:40) of food and i'm certainly not consuming that much food Speaker 6 (8:44) and Speaker 5 (8:45) so i was like well i'm starving myself well Speaker 6 (8:48) this is like the hardest time too of like breastfeeding is like yeah you know like they're getting hungrier you're right before they're starting solid so they're hungry and it's still all you yeah so you gotta up that well in five months i'm like Speaker 5 (9:02) i think i feel fine but then i go work out i'm like i don't feel fine yes that's how i felt Speaker 6 (9:07) um yeah i totally felt that way and then i literally once i stopped nursing at a year it was like life had been just breathed into me and i was like i'm fit but like i feel like you came back Speaker 3 (9:20) I struggled really bad at four to five months postpartum too. Yeah. I feel like there's a hormone shift there that I really felt. And I got frustrated at the gym because I'm like, I feel like I should be feeling stronger. I feel like I should be doing, like I've been coming, you know. You feel like there should be a shift, but you're just still so fresh. Yeah. But Speaker 5 (9:37) five months doesn't feel fresh. No, but it is. It really is when you think about it in like the Speaker 3 (9:41) grand scheme of things. Like you look at Speaker 5 (9:43) your baby and you're like, but he's. not fresh anymore right like he feels like not a newborn anymore Speaker 6 (9:48) but Speaker 5 (9:49) yeah you're Speaker 6 (9:50) just starting over Speaker 5 (9:51) from scratch yeah it's just hard yeah well and i Speaker 6 (9:53) also think like you have to remember like five months we think of it as like a long time but like if we were talking about pregnancy like five months into pregnancy you have a long you're only halfway so you know what Speaker 5 (10:04) i Speaker 6 (10:04) mean like you got to give yourself grace in that because it really isn't that long because you think six weeks right after birth there's nothing there and then you're basically just like running yourself into the ground yeah trying to feed the baby and take care of the other kids and like you're on the back burner still and i like i agree i think there's a total hormone shift at like five months because that's always when i go downhill yeah like and this is my worst Speaker 5 (10:29) one i've never felt like that the other ones but this one i'm like noticing it really i was gonna Speaker 3 (10:33) ask because val just had her third her third baby yeah um cute jackie do you feel like your expectations postpartum after the third were different or bad like do you feel like you thought oh i got this and then yeah i thought that the Speaker 2 (10:46) second Speaker 3 (10:46) i'm like well i do it again with the third probably yeah no yeah realistic expectations for myself i Speaker 5 (10:51) totally was like no i'm good like i know what to do and i know what to expect and i feel like as far as like management wise of like okay i've got three kids like that's easy i feel like i've got that i like figured that's come really easy but yeah the like fit my physical part of it has been a lot harder yeah Speaker 3 (11:10) and Speaker 5 (11:11) it's not sleep or anything like that it's just like i feel like my body should be able to do the things it could even Speaker 3 (11:17) during Speaker 5 (11:18) pregnancy. And I'm like, no, I'm not quite there yet. You know? So it just feels like it's taking a little bit longer. Yeah. And it's like, I haven't really lost weight this time. Like I did with the other ones. Speaker 6 (11:28) So Speaker 5 (11:29) it's just, everything's a little slower. And so I'm like, maybe that's age and it's just, yeah. Third, third, third time. So I think my expectations were off a little bit. Speaker 6 (11:39) There will come a time. I always, I literally just. a year postpartum is like I give myself a full year and then after that I can you know but I'm so glad that like I can be hot feel hot if Speaker 5 (11:51) I could if I could pick though like I would much rather have the wrong expectations of like me physically than the wrong expectations of like what my family like looks like you know because I feel like that's just so Speaker 3 (12:02) hard like Speaker 5 (12:03) that was really hard with one to two Speaker 3 (12:04) but Speaker 5 (12:05) I so I'd rather have it this way because it feels more like okay I can like do xyz yeah to help it i cannot work out as much or eat more or whatever but the other one it's like can Speaker 3 (12:16) someone come help me and live at my house and literally me yeah like all Speaker 5 (12:21) of Speaker 3 (12:21) us Speaker 5 (12:22) so mom never leaves yeah i mean tears anytime my mom would leave with my second so see Speaker 6 (12:28) i feel like i all i mean i don't know cozy was so cozy was Caitlin's like, I always disagree about this. Well, no, I don't disagree because I can understand that. But I really just had to get with it within two weeks. Like after two weeks of having cozy, I mean, we were at the farm five Speaker 5 (12:45) days. Feeding the animals. Speaker 6 (12:48) I was at Girls Night, I think, a week in, and I'm like, who's holding my baby? Because I just was like, I'm certainly exiting the house, so I don't lose it. But I don't know. I just, within two weeks, I had to get with it. And so I just was like, we're just going to try to get back to our normal and get out of the house by 10 a.m., which is like a feat. But I mean, I don't know. I had to for my eldest because that was, yeah, she was really struggling. But yeah, so I Speaker 4 (13:15) think it. Speaker 6 (13:16) I mean, I'm not expecting the third to go. Same. Speaker 4 (13:19) Like, Speaker 6 (13:20) I'm not expecting that to be walking the park, Speaker 5 (13:22) like, at all. But you just know you can do it. Totally. And I'm like, I Speaker 6 (13:26) always am like, you have to get uncomfy to stretch. Like, you have to get in that uncomfy and just go with it. And I would just find the humor in everything. Like, remember how Cozy would literally have a blowout? Literally every day. Every single day. And it was like, all right, we're packing for at least two blowouts while we're out. And you know what? Ain't no thang. Well, I'll Speaker 3 (13:46) wrap that up. I'll encourage you in that, Val. Thanks. You've done an amazing job. You look amazing. Oh, Speaker 5 (13:51) thank you. Speaker 3 (13:51) You've done such a good job of just being so present with your kids. I haven't Speaker 5 (13:55) even known that you Speaker 3 (13:56) were struggling with those thoughts or anything. I just feel like you carry yourself so gracefully. Sweet. Thank you. I agree. Except for yesterday Speaker 5 (14:03) when I was just in the fetal. Let's crack it up. Speaker 3 (14:07) We were like not, we talked about hanging out and it was like. I said, I also want to hang. And I wasn't looking you in the eyes. Then you go, maybe we could push it to next week. I was like, that's perfect. Speaker 4 (14:16) Maybe we could push it. Speaker 3 (14:17) I said, I really don't want to hang out right now. And then I was like, I need to lay down. I need to lay Speaker 4 (14:22) down. That's so real. Speaker 3 (14:24) I love Speaker 4 (14:24) it. That is so real. Let me hear your hope in your heart. Speaker 6 (14:27) I feel like my hope this week is just, like, we've been having, like, a lot of family time. And I have just been loving that. Like, I feel like after we started preschool, I'm like, let's just. Speaker 2 (14:38) let's do fun things as a family and just be Speaker 6 (14:40) together like all the time so we've been doing a lot of family time and it's been it's been super fun and then my heart is that my oldest is not feeling great yeah so we had a couple yeah we had a couple days of lots of laundry so i'm just like and i feel like being sick i'm always like Speaker 5 (14:58) don't give it to the other one and so Speaker 6 (15:01) yeah it's just what does she Speaker 5 (15:02) have what is it i don't Yeah, it's Speaker 6 (15:04) been so weird and like yesterday no symptoms Yeah, nothing and then this morning symptoms and I'm like sister. What does she have a Speaker 4 (15:15) rash? Well, Speaker 6 (15:16) no, she had a rash for What it was literally like two months ago. I noticed it and I was you know texting it to our close personal friend Dr. Speaker 1 (15:26) Cooper and Speaker 6 (15:28) I'm like do I need to take her in like what's going on and I sent him pictures and now there's like it's hypo pigmentation like they're white dots and he's I know and I said do I need to be concerned about that and he's like no it's just what happens like they'll go yeah they'll go away over time so I'm like okay but yeah the rash there's Speaker 3 (15:46) a little Speaker 4 (15:46) rash going around Speaker 3 (15:47) um yeah having sick kids is so hard it's the worst you got in the car today after seeing you and he was like Speaker 5 (15:53) i Speaker 3 (15:53) don't feel good like benny oh i think you're fine buddy yeah yeah you're you're just happy but you're fine no he's totally fine Speaker 6 (16:00) and that's i even have to do that with benny because i'm like what are you watching yeah Speaker 3 (16:04) like Speaker 6 (16:04) i remember it's like we would be watching check in Speaker 3 (16:07) i'm like Speaker 6 (16:07) well it's like we'd be watching up and it's like you know when he's walking the house he's like my elbow hurts well which elbow my knee hurts that's very much my child I love that. So I'm like, I've seen her pull that one on you. Totally. Totally. She hasn't, gosh. So she's a little drama queen. So I have to be like, is this Speaker 3 (16:27) for real? Speaker 6 (16:28) But he was so sweet helping me buckle cozy into the card. He's like, can I, can Speaker 3 (16:31) I be a big helper? I'm like, yeah. Speaker 6 (16:33) Or like when he came to me and was just like wanting me to love on him for a minute. I was like, oh Speaker 5 (16:38) yeah. That was sweet. I was like, that was sweet. He did. And I was a Speaker 6 (16:42) little shook that he did, but I was like, I'm so grateful. Thanks for coming to me, buddy. That was Speaker 3 (16:46) so precious. It's always an honor when another kid chooses you. You're like, yes. Speaker 6 (16:50) You're like, I am a safe Mother Teresa. Yes. Speaker 3 (16:54) They love me. They love Speaker 6 (16:55) me. Speaker 3 (16:56) Thank you to Instant Hydration for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. I'm not even kidding you guys. I'm about to go make myself one. Dump that hydration in there. They are Speaker 1 (17:04) so... Good. I'm obsessed with the flavor. Like, I literally just crave it. Which ones do you have? I love the strawberry lemon. Me too. It's so good. Speaker 3 (17:11) And Speaker 1 (17:11) you guys, it doesn't even taste like an artificial strawberry flavor. No. Like, Speaker 3 (17:15) it Speaker 1 (17:15) tastes like real strawberries and real lemon. It's the perfect amount of sweet, and it's the perfect amount of salty. Instant hydration is the perfect amount of hydration that my body needs. Breastfeeding with living an active lifestyle. Instant hydration is a premium electrolyte drink mix designed to support hydration, energy, recovery, focus, and overall performance without sugar or unnecessary additives. One of the biggest differences with Instant Hydration is that they use authentic French gray sea salt imported literally from France. It's naturally harvested and rich in naturally occurring trace minerals. They're known Speaker 3 (17:47) for their refreshing flavors, not overly salty, smooth taste, and just making it an easy daily habit. For a better way to stay hydrated, go to instanthydration.com slash alwayshere and use our promo code alwayshere for over 40 % off your first subscription order. It's Instant Hydration's best offer available. That's instanthydration.com slash always here promo code always here. Okay, let's talk. I don't we probably should introduce a little bit more how we all became friends because maybe some context would be helpful. Yeah, they're like, Speaker 6 (18:15) who are these people? Why are they on the podcast? Speaker 3 (18:17) Yeah, just more than like they're our friends. But wow, we became friends. We both moved here at the same time. Yeah, we moved here after each other. Speaker 5 (18:24) And we had a mutual friend. Yeah. Speaker 3 (18:26) Or Speaker 5 (18:26) like a mutual mentor friend. Yes. And they kind of. put us together and we just hit it off yeah Speaker 3 (18:33) we did we were both pregnant and we were Speaker 5 (18:35) you were farther along than me Speaker 3 (18:37) but Speaker 5 (18:37) yeah we just hit it off our husbands hit it off and then that's Speaker 3 (18:40) how Speaker 5 (18:40) i met abby it's because we were in like a group like a mom's group together yeah and so it was at my house everyone came she was there and our kids were the same age so we were like let's all do stuff together yeah Speaker 3 (18:52) do you know something that's kind of funny about that this is this is just my personality type This might be bad, but I think someone texted maybe it was you and you're like does anybody want to go to the park? Just like on a wing. Yeah, and I was like Do people just go to the park on a wing? Like I was like so And then Abby responded. Yeah, I'd love to and I was like, oh my gosh people say yes I need to start saying yes to things and I was like, this is a good example of putting yourself out there and asking people to join along and then that's how you become friends it's just like putting yourself out there and saying yes to things because in my head i was like i i'm immediately no but Speaker 5 (19:28) i don't know why i think i just did it i was just Speaker 3 (19:30) comfortable in my house well and i remember Speaker 5 (19:31) i remember that because dave was out of town for work and so i was by myself and i was like i've gotta gotta get out do something you know i've got these two little kids and so i think it was a saturday which is like risky business with Speaker 1 (19:43) moms parks are busy and Speaker 5 (19:44) it's like yeah everyone's with their family But yeah, and I, we became friends through that. Speaker 3 (19:50) And then just, that Speaker 5 (19:52) was years ago though. Yeah. Speaker 3 (19:53) That set a good tone. I feel like for our friend group, it was just being like, let's just set play dates and throw it out there. Who wants to come and just come if you can type vibe. And Speaker 5 (20:01) then I came to burn with you like two years ago. Yeah. And then I feel Speaker 3 (20:05) like that's Speaker 5 (20:05) just, Speaker 3 (20:06) yeah. Speaker 6 (20:06) Caitlin's Speaker 5 (20:06) the burn gal. Speaker 6 (20:07) You were at Augie's gender reveal and I didn't know you. No, not gender. no it wasn't his gender real it was i was at griffin's second birthday Speaker 5 (20:14) yeah we were just talking about that the other day yeah Speaker 6 (20:16) it was griffin we were both there but we didn't know each other yeah we didn't know each other and i was like fresh friends with abby i feel like fresh friends but i was like i want to make friends and i had reached out to her a couple times because like you know griffin and benny would like play a lot together like at the gym and i was like hey i do something fun after the gym every single day if you ever want to tag along like you know we're going here tomorrow like if you want to come and then she started like moving things around to like go to these things like our funtivity yeah Speaker 3 (20:49) is Speaker 6 (20:49) was that and so i just that's kind of then she just invited me to griffin's party and i was like well okay like i want to make an effort to go and then i'll invite her to benny's birthday party because it was just like a month later and i feel like just from there it's you know taken off like our friendship was just kind of taken off and I feel like Speaker 5 (21:06) You Speaker 6 (21:07) I talked to a little bit Griffin's party. Yeah, but like you had just started burn I think yeah at that time. Yeah fresh So I was like, oh great like I'll Speaker 2 (21:15) be Speaker 6 (21:15) seeing you around like, you know, just cute things But then I just feel like we all mesh so well and we all have like I don't know like it's motherhood so Speaker 3 (21:25) much Speaker 6 (21:25) more fun together and i think we've all realized that and so it's like okay like yeah like let's get together let's make that effort yeah to do a funtivity or whatever you know Speaker 3 (21:33) caitlyn for context and if you're this friend or if you're like the person who's a good planner and you're like a glue of a friend group this is such a good idea that caitlyn did she created a shared note and she plans weekly funtivity so it'll be monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday and some days there aren't things but you'll look up the free activities going on in the area the cheap the taller times you've done all the research yeah Speaker 6 (21:56) and Speaker 3 (21:56) you'll just put it on there and if there's anyone who's new we'll just add them to that shared note totally there's like never an open invite Speaker 6 (22:02) and Speaker 3 (22:03) they're out and about it's not like someone's house where you know you're maybe feel capped at people or don't over invite it's just an out of the house activity with the kids every day and anyone could come so yeah yeah because even our friends with Speaker 5 (22:14) no kids sometimes go oh totally like lauren she comes Speaker 6 (22:17) like and i love when she comes oh my gosh i'm like wow i get to eat another set of kids a good idea it's so fun and i i mean the reason i started doing that is because bennett was working from home all of a sudden and he couldn't be Speaker 5 (22:28) there Speaker 6 (22:29) no and our house at the time was like he didn't have an office or like a room he was just in the dining room working so i'm like we gotta get out. Yeah. Like she is bothering Speaker 3 (22:39) him like to no Speaker 6 (22:41) end. So I'm like, we have got to get out. And so, and that's how I like, I met Ashley is I was like, Hey, you're new here, like to Arizona. And I was like, I do something fun every single day. Yeah. So if you want to do that, I feel like it's easier to parent toddlers outside of the house than inside. Speaker 5 (22:57) Yeah. At Speaker 6 (22:58) least for me. So I don't know. And I just feel like it worked and it's Speaker 5 (23:02) a great idea.