Will Yun Lee: The Call That Changed Everything & Fighting for His Son's Life | AJ Buckley Show

AJ Buckley Show

On this episode of The AJ Buckley Show, actor Will Yun Lee opens up about his remarkable journey—from growing up in poverty and moving between families after his parents'

Key takeaways

• Will Yun Lee's early life was marked by instability and poverty, with years spent moving between family homes after his parents' divorce.
• His connection with martial arts began not from ambition but as a survival mechanism—learning discipline and strength to cope with bullying and hardship.

Main topics

• Childhood trauma and family instability
• Martial arts as identity and survival

Notable quotes

"I was always scared to go to school, you know? Yeah. And then, you know, nothing really came of it. He was just busy trying to figure out how to be a new dad."

Conclusion

Will Yun Lee's story is one of transformation—from a child shaped by hardship to

Transcript preview

Speaker 2 (0:00) For many of us, going further isn't a choice. It's a feeling we can't ignore because ambition has a way of outgrowing where it began, turning dreams into direction. Every journey brings us closer to the life we imagine. So, where will your journey take you? Etihad, beyond borders. Speaker 1 (0:29) He's fought James Bond. He's fought Wolverine. Speaker 1 (0:35) He has fought some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Then one morning his phone rang and little did he know he was about to be in the biggest fight of his life. Thousands of miles away from home, he gets a call that his three-year-old son just had a stroke. And what this father did next, you'll want to hear. Speaker 2 (0:57) This is William Lee. Speaker 1 (1:00) Oh, my man. Will, welcome to the show, buddy. Speaker 3 (1:03) Thanks for having me, man. Appreciate it. Speaker 1 (1:05) Yeah. It's been a minute, man. It has been a minute since I've actually physically seen you. Yeah. But, you know, I always see you constantly either on the... That's the problem with Instagram. It's like you think that you, like, you're keeping up with people or you're seeing them, but your mind plays tricks. I don't know when the last time we actually physically... I Speaker 3 (1:25) mean, it had to be before you moved. So, you know, we're looking at at least eight to 10 years. Speaker 1 (1:32) Wow. Yeah. And then, cause we've just been on, you know, you, we've been both very blessed with, with work and stuff. You've been, you were up in Vancouver for a long, so long doing the good doctor. And then even then when I, when I, when I came to Vancouver to do something, you guys were on hiatus and stuff like that. So, but dude, it's great to see you, man. It's I'm such a, a big fan of you. um as an actor and the work that you you've done i was always as a fan prior to you know being introduced to you but uh i just really believe man you're you're you're one of the greats just in so many things that you do your performances you deliver you give such honest raw performance and you know for someone that's been cast as the villain is that each time that you you come on the screen you have such new take in such an it's such interesting stories especially with your martial arts background and how you implement those skills into the characters. And, um, dude, I'm, um, it's truly honored to get to sit. No, man. Yeah. Speaker 3 (2:30) I'm equally a big fan. I'm like, does AJ ever stop moving? I mean, I love calling you during COVID and you're like, you need a 60 foot gallon refrigerator. And then you went through the whole survival list. I'm like, we got to get all these things, babe. Speaker 1 (2:48) And then I packed up the motor home and drove. I was like, I rented a 40 foot diesel pusher. And we just were like, we're not staying here. I love Speaker 3 (2:56) it. I love it, man. Yeah. It's so good to catch up. I'm so glad we're doing this. Speaker 1 (3:02) Me too, man. Me too. Well, I love to, your, your, your career obviously speaks for itself and millions of people know who you are, but I, part of the joy of, of doing this podcast is, is getting to sort of. really peel back the layers and sort of read the journeyman story that each guest has been on. And you have such an incredible story. So I'd love to go back to the beginning and just sort of talk about like, where are you from? Speaker 3 (3:31) Where it all started. Yeah, I was born in... Speaker 3 (3:36) Arlington, Virginia. My dad, you know, came to the United States, I think somewhere around 1967. He was one of the first Taekwondo masters to come to the United States. So at that time, it was a lot of karate masters. So he was one of the first, you know, I guess they called it back then Korean karate, Taekwondo. And I was born, yeah, so I was born in Virginia, and he had a bunch of schools there. And, you know, not too many people know about this version of my life. But, you know, I think at, I think five, um, my parents got divorced and, uh, my dad didn't know what to do. It kind of, you know, the businesses kind of all imploded and everything went haywire and, you know, he just dropped me off at, uh, I just went from family to family for about six years. Um, you know, living in. cousins houses and friends homes and you know just kind of my dad was trying to figure out life he was a young father um and then by the time i hit uh 11 10 or 11 years old i moved back uh with him um i thought my dad had died at one point and my aunt called my dad up and said it's time to take your son back so i got to hawaii where my dad was living and he was living in a motel So we lived in a really shitty motel for a long time. It was kind of like the kitchen and the bathroom were the same. He had a little hot pot and rice cooker, and he was driving taxis. And it was just like I was barefoot all the time. It looked like I lived on the streets of Hawaii. But a lot of my childhood, my first kind of bit back with my father was in Hawaii. I got beat up a lot. Hawaii's, they love to get out. Hawaii's Speaker 1 (5:31) tough, Speaker 3 (5:31) man. Yeah, Hawaii's tough. And I never- That's a lot of Speaker 1 (5:34) people. People don't understand that. In Hawaii, the local culture there, it is very, it's not only people that go to the streets of Hawaii, but there is real, you have to prove yourself in those circles. Speaker 3 (5:48) Yeah. And that's kind of the beautiful part of Hawaii. It's a very family, very like once you're once you're in you're in and and so you know i got indoctrinated into hawaii with a couple of fists and uh you know that was the beginning of me asking my dad you know i want to learn martial arts um but yeah we lived there for a long time then we we eventually moved to san francisco and i think all said and done i think i went to i think i counted it out at one point 23 different schools so i was always the i was always the the scared kid who walked into a new school sometimes twice a year, my dad would just move, you know, and he would blame his economics on the economics of the city. So he'd pick a new city and we'd be gone. And so by the time I think I reached college, which I eventually considered my first home because it was the first time we didn't move within 12 months. And it was the first time that I got to establish myself as a young man and, you know. you collect your friends and and and who become your family and uh yeah and then you know fast forward you know i thought i was gonna i thought i was gonna become a lawyer because korean fathers or parents always say you need to be a doctor or a lawyer and so uh i thought you know i wasn't smart enough i knew to be a doctor i realized quickly i wasn't smart enough to be a lawyer And so I started taking over his martial arts schools. And then one day... Speaker 1 (7:22) Not to interrupt you there. So when you were in Hawaii and you went and talked to your dad about... like training with them. What was that moment like for you where you, you, you obviously gotten in a couple of scuffles and, and you hadn't really, you know, had you connected with your father on other levels or was this the one sort of thing that you're like, Hey, maybe there'll be a connection here. Every single night. It's the same fight. Too cold in the room, too hot in the room, too cold in the room, too hot in the room. The ghost bed climate pro is dual sided. Her temperature, her side. My temperature, my side. Cooling and heating built right into the bed. The GhostBed Climate Pro drops in November, so go to ghostbed.com forward slash Buckley and sign up now. Here at the AG Buckley Show, we just started working with a company called Cortrex. Cortrex is an e-commerce team out of Walmart's backyard that takes brands from launch to millions a month. It is a risk-free guarantee. You want to book a strategy call with these guys? I highly recommend it. Go to coretrex.com. That's C-O-R-E-T-R-E-X dot com. These guys are the game changer. Speaker 3 (8:37) I don't think I thought that deeply. I just knew it was, I was always scared to go to school, you know? Yeah. And then, you know, nothing really came of it. He was just busy trying to figure out how to be a new dad. Speaker 1 (8:51) Got it. Speaker 3 (8:51) So. It wasn't until we moved back to the Bay Area in San Francisco and I got really beat up. And then he had just opened up a school in Napa Valley of all places. Speaker 3 (9:07) So we'd drive, you know, every day somehow he would drive there and eventually he started taking me and I put on my first, you know, my white belt at 13 years old. And, you know, he was one of those dads, like he never pushed me to do it. And then until the day I said, I want to do this, then he locked the door behind me and I was training six hours a day. No Speaker 1 (9:27) way. Speaker 3 (9:28) Yeah. you know and then i eventually hated him for it because i was kind of like that you know that gymnastic kid or that ice skater kid where it's like you wake up at five in the morning and you train and and you know that was my life for a good solid five years before i went to college where every day i lived in the studio after school i rode my bike to the to the studio and i stayed there till nine ten o'clock at night did Speaker 1 (9:52) you find like stillness because you obviously with moving around and stuff Throughout your life, did you find a stillness within the martial art for the first time where it was like, this was your discovery? This was your, you Speaker 3 (10:06) know, I don't know if I was mature enough to understand that. All I knew was I was obsessed with it. And, um, I just Speaker 1 (10:15) obsessed in what, obsessed in what, what was it about? No, I bought Speaker 3 (10:18) every Bruce Lee book, you know, he had like the five different books of, of self-defense I bought. I would break down kicks. I would break down sequences and, and, you know, I, and then I'd watch movies, you know, that one guy, I forgot what his Al Young, maybe he would do jump spinning hook kicks and then Ernie Reyes, you know, and, Speaker 1 (10:36) and, Speaker 3 (10:36) you know, and so I just became obsessed with the whole part of it. And then, uh, And then what happened was they introduced Taekwondo Olympics was they introduced it into the Olympics in 1988. And that became my goal. I wanted to go to the Olympics. And so I, you know, I trained my ass off and, you know, all the things that come with what we we understand as martial arts in terms of like finding stillness, finding peace. It's like my aggressive version of yoga. I didn't Speaker 1 (11:10) really understand Speaker 3 (11:11) it until much later in life that those were all the things that it was doing for me. Speaker 1 (11:17) Yeah. I guess it's true, though. It's like with that perspective of looking back, it's like when you're in it, you're just trying to get through the day and whatever that – Speaker 1 (11:33) When I was younger, I didn't have such a concept of time. I didn't understand what time was. I was like, oh, this is what I'm doing. But there was no like, you know, because I hadn't experienced it. I didn't have enough experience under my belt to like comprehend what was happening. But I was sort of building the data center in my brain of like my own journey. And it's crazy when you do look back like you just said there. It's like all of a sudden you're like. Oh yeah. Like I didn't know that that, but it's amazing what, how you're guided through those things that you're attracted to and how that builds who the man you are today that you can actually look back and go, Oh, that actually, that's what was happening there. I was, you know, I was learning and now I can have this perspective. It blows me away when that stuff happens. Speaker 3 (12:19) Absolutely. For sure. Speaker 1 (12:21) Did your, um, did your dad. When he when you and him saw the he saw that passion in you for the martial arts was there the father son sort of I'm going to accomplish more, you know, with my father when, you know, we'd always have like, it would be fun in a sense of like, oh, I would, if my dad was faster than me, I would want to be faster than him. If my dad could, you know, kick the ball farther, I would want to be able to do it, you know, whatever it was. But I would always be challenging him unknowingly, you know, until sort of the torch was passed. Was there something within that that you were like, you know? No, you Speaker 3 (13:05) know. honestly then you know he was always superman to me um yeah you know i i still remember this day i don't remember a ton of things early in my life but i do remember the day that that my mother left and it was an empty condo in staten island uh in staten island we where we were living and all the furniture had been taken except for a mattress and and i was laying there And, you know, I still remember it like yesterday where, you know, I'm laying and, you know, he's next to me. And I asked him if he's ever going to, I don't know why I remember this, but I asked him if he's ever going to die. And then he looked at me and he said, he said, no, I'm Superman. And so I believed it, you know. So he was always that figure to me. I remember, I think at 15, we were sparring, him and I. And, you know, obviously he was older. And he roundhouse kicked me so hard in the head. And I don't even know he realized what happened. And I was on the ground. And he grabbed me and he held me. It was the last time he ever sparred me. I think he was just mortified. I think he thought he killed me. Because it felt like a gunshot to the head. Yeah. So, you know, I never had that thought. You know, I just loved it. You know, it became this obsessive passion. And, you know. And then I went through a period of where I was there, you know, from, you know, when you're a 16-year-old kid and everyone's out partying or everyone's, you know, going to track or football. And, you know, my life was stuck in the studio. And so, you know, there was a period of love-hate with the martial arts where I was just like, why do I have to now do it six hours? Why do I have to be here six hours a day? Because I was helping teaching and all these different things. You know, you come full circle, and by the time you hit 30, you realize, you know, I think from 20 to 25, you think you know more than your dad. And as the years creep up, you realize you don't. And, you know, he becomes your hero all over again. Speaker 1 (15:10) Yeah, yeah. My dad was, you know, was always my hero to the day he died and still is. And that's one of the biggest things with my kids is I pray that I. will always you know i'll always be their hero to them that that they they'll always have that image of me you know and i talk about this a lot is like it's like as a dad you we don't know what we're doing what i'm doing i'm just trying my best and i hope that in the moment that i make that split decision to make a decision for them whether it's it's how i you know we're pretty strict at our house you know um Speaker 1 (15:52) And it's how I was raised. But I always hope that I'm doing the right thing. But I don't know. But sometimes it'll keep me up. I'm like, was I too hard on the boys today? Did I? Did I not listen to Willow properly? Did I snap too quickly? But you just don't know. And it's not until later where I found where I've grown more as a dad is like where I can go and talk to my daughter and be like, hey, you know what, Willow? I didn't handle that properly. You were asking me something else. I was going through some stress today. I took that on you, and I apologize. I'm just trying to figure this out. And I feel like the more that I go and talk to them about my own struggles and how I'm just trying to figure it out and how. Telling them sometimes I'm scared. Sometimes I don't know what I'm – but I always know that I love them and that I'm doing my best, and that's all. And if you've got something to say, then come to me. And I might not always – don't think I'm always right. Let's talk. And to me, that's been the most humbling thing. And I realize my dad kind of did that too, but it was in his own way. He just was very – the door was always open. Speaker 3 (17:04) Yeah. You Speaker 1 (17:04) know, that's Speaker 3 (17:05) beautiful. Speaker 1 (17:06) And it's a, it's a, it's a learning, uh, you're constantly learning as a father. So, um, now back to San Francisco, right? So Berkeley, you go to Berkeley, you end up at Berkeley. Speaker 3 (17:17) Yeah. Is Speaker 1 (17:18) that correct? Yeah. So how did, how old were you there? And, and, and, and this is sort of where. You know, I read you were teaching kids in the neighborhood and stuff. Speaker 3 (17:27) Yeah. So, I mean, basically, I wasn't smart enough to get into Berkeley. You know, I'm the Asian that ruined the bell curve. Like, you know, I was horrible at math, you know. Speaker 1 (17:40) What? Yeah. Speaker 3 (17:42) No way. I took the SAT five times and I got the same score five times. And I'll never forget. I was like, 10, 20 will barely get me into a state school. That's Speaker 1 (17:52) consistency though. That's good. Consistency is good. I think Speaker 3 (17:55) that's a feat to do that five times in a row. And, you know, but fortunately I had Taekwondo and at that time it was the first year they were implementing an athletics recruitment program. So Speaker 2 (18:08) they Speaker 3 (18:09) took one athlete a year and I was lucky to get that spot. So then I went to go teach, you know, I would help teach, you know, part of the the taekwondo program i would you know run drills and then you know the the professor who brought me in was a guy named dr ken min and uh i was just very fortunate that that that program existed and uh did terribly in school because i was still obsessed with with competing um and then i think by the third year i realized i wasn't going to get into law school Like it was an impossible feat with my grades and my standardized test taking abilities. So I thought selfishly I needed volunteer work. So I was just like, okay, I need to put that on my resume. And I went to a bunch of different places, and I landed at a place called the East Bay Asian Youth Center. And at that time, my mentor was a guy named David Kakashiba. He ran two programs, and one of them was one he let me kind of... he let me be a part of and help develop called the neighborhood action project. And it was where we took a lot of kids from, from the inner cities of inner city of Oakland, East Oakland and East Oakland. If you know, Speaker 1 (19:25) that's, that's, that's tough. Yeah. Is Speaker 3 (19:27) a really, really rough area. Um, it was, it was heavy gang culture. Um, a lot of Southeast Asian, like, you know, uh, A lot of Southeast Asian, you know, there were different sets, Crips and Blood sets in there. Of Speaker 1 (19:42) Asian Crips and Bloods? Speaker 3 (19:44) Bloods, yeah, yeah. So they were, at least the kids I was working with, they were all Crips. They were juniors, so they were between 13 and 15. So, you know, I went in there at first, like Speaker 2 (19:57) as a selfish thing to put on my resume, and then I ended up going, oh, Speaker 3 (20:01) they're letting me develop a curriculum. So the kids would get paid to be there. Speaker 3 (20:06) And it was a grant. And so from nine to one, I would teach them Asian American studies, but I knew I had to teach it in a different way that they would sit and want to learn. So we opened every day with a rap song and we broke it down and what it meant. No Speaker 1 (20:23) way. Speaker 3 (20:23) Yeah. So I think the first song I did was an Ice Cube song and we broke it down. And then from one to five, we would go into their neighborhoods and clean. and that was what Speaker 1 (20:34) ice cube song was it i Speaker 3 (20:38) think it was called black korea um oh Speaker 1 (20:41) no way yeah Speaker 3 (20:41) you know so what what Speaker 1 (20:43) what did it what did that mean to them that song I Speaker 3 (20:46) think at first they were just like, holy shit, this guy's dropping beats at the beginning of class. You know, I hit the tape record, the play button, and they were like, what is he doing? He's not like a regular teacher. And we just discussed, you know, just the history of blacks and Koreans in America and their overarching relationships with each other having to be put in the same community. Speaker 3 (21:13) you know, it was just an open discussion on how two people who don't speak the same language are in the same economic division and the good things, the bad things that came from it. And hopefully we see in the evolution of time that there was a cross, like, you know, a bonding, especially during the George Floyd Speaker 2 (21:34) movement. Speaker 3 (21:37) you know it it just became those