Richard Speight Jr.: Band of Brothers & The Scene He Wrote That Made It to Screen | AJ Buckley Show

AJ Buckley Show

AJ Buckley sits down with actor and director Richard Speight Jr. to discuss his journey from Nashville theater to major television and film

Key takeaways

• Richard Speint Jr. began his career performing in local Nashville theater and Disney Channel productions like Ernest Goes to Camp.
• The hosts discuss the emotional weight of parenting, with Richard describing the process of sending a son to college as 'unexplored territory.'

Main topics

• Fatherhood and Parenting
• Acting Career Origins

Notable quotes

Our job as parents is to make our job obsolete.

Conclusion

A deeply personal look at how life's transitions and family responsibi

Transcript preview

Speaker 2 (0:00) Welcome back to the AJ Buckley show. So just to give you a heads up what you're about to hear are some archived episodes of The show formerly real fake seal which became the AJ Buckley show So when you hear the intro real fake seal sex appeal, that's where this all began So some of these episodes we did when we transferred over Were taken down And you, the fans, that said, hey, I wanted to hear the Gary Sinise episode or the Dallas Alexander or some of the other amazing guests that we had on the show. So, producer Sean said, your wish is his command. And here you go. So, this is still the A.J. Buckley Show, but it's the formerly Real Fake Seal Archive episodes. Enjoy the show, and I will see you next Tuesday. Speaker 1 (0:50) My next guest is Richard Spade. Richard Speaker 2 (0:52) is... an actor, a director, a father. Welcome to the show, brother. Good to see you, Richard. Speaker 1 (0:58) Good to see you. It's been a minute. And good for you for having a show. I'm new to this news, too. You Speaker 2 (1:04) know what? I'm really enjoying doing this. This is something that I just love talking to people. And it's just like, let's have some fun. So we jumped, and here we are. So I just started reaching out to my buddies, and you were one of them. And you answered the call. I love it, man. Speaker 1 (1:20) I was stoked to have you reach out. Speaker 2 (1:22) All right. So how are you, buddy? Where have you been? Every time I see your Instagram or anything, you're somewhere in the world living the rock star lifestyle that you do. Speaker 1 (1:31) Sure, that's it. Speaker 2 (1:35) How are you? Where have you been? Speaker 1 (1:37) We just got back from Chicago. We Speaker 2 (1:39) were in Speaker 1 (1:40) Chicago doing, as you know, being a Supernatural alum, the convention circuit is. has long tendrils. Yeah. And so we were there doing a little supernatural dog and pony show this weekend. And previous to that, this has been a summer of, and you can appreciate this as a father. This has been a summer of getting a son off to college. You're not there yet, Speaker 2 (2:05) but Speaker 1 (2:06) my oldest started college. And that to me, that has been my all encompassing summer journey. Speaker 2 (2:11) What like emotionally, how are you? Oh, terrible. Yeah, that would suck. It's awful. I'm dreading that day. Speaker 1 (2:17) You know what sucks is that, like, I feel bad because we live in a podcast world. Yeah. You know, my dad didn't. Your dad didn't. Yeah. But we do. And we're also, you know, guys who can have a podcast and have people listen to it. So, like it or not, my son's going to know about my emotional journey. Like, my dad kept his bottled up. Speaker 2 (2:37) Yeah. Speaker 1 (2:37) But mine's just going to be out there for everybody to analyze. But really, like. Man, there's not much I... Speaker 1 (2:48) cling to in this world, but I cling to my children. Speaker 2 (2:53) I Speaker 1 (2:53) love being a dad. That's my favorite thing in the world. Speaker 2 (2:56) Being a dad is the best thing in the world. I wouldn't trade for anything. Speaker 1 (2:59) And I constantly am always analyzing my own parenting and judging myself. I'm a harsh critic of my own work, but it's just the never-ending, ever-evolving process of trying to be the best dad you can be. Speaker 1 (3:16) And this is just a new chapter, right? You don't know what it's like to have a kid until you have a kid. You don't know what it's like to walk. You don't know what it's like to take him to the doctor. You don't know anything until you are doing it. Speaker 2 (3:26) Yeah. Speaker 1 (3:27) For the first time. And so sending a son off or a child off to college was completely unexplored territory. And, you know, this is. Speaker 1 (3:38) this is what's supposed to happen. Like our job as parents is to make our job obsolete. Speaker 2 (3:43) Yeah. I heard this person say recently. Speaker 2 (3:51) The thing I realized when I was raising my son is that I'm raising him to be a strong man so he can leave me one day. Correct. And I was like, I got choked up. I was like, oh, my God. My job is to prepare him to like. To Speaker 1 (4:06) walk out the door. Speaker 2 (4:08) And Speaker 1 (4:08) not only to walk out the door, but to walk out the door gladly. Speaker 2 (4:11) Yeah, gladly. Speaker 1 (4:12) And like ready to go. Like, I'm ready to go. I want to scoot. I'm done with this phase. And you're just like, Speaker 2 (4:17) yeah, Speaker 1 (4:18) I. Speaker 1 (4:20) So it's all working correctly. Like it's, it's like building an airplane that you want to fly and being, and then being heartbroken when you see it sail off to the sunset. Speaker 2 (4:32) Every single night, it's the same fight. Too cold in the room, too hot in the room, too cold in the room, too hot in the room. The Ghostbed Climate Pro is dual sided. Her temperature, her side, my temperature, my side. Cooling and heating built. right into the bed. The GhostBed Climate Pro drops in November, so go to ghostbed.com forward slash Buckley and sign up now. Here at the AG Buckley Show, we just started working with a company called Cortrex. Cortrex is an e-commerce team out of Walmart's backyard that takes brands from launch to millions a month. It is a risk-free guarantee. You want to book a strategy call with these guys? I highly recommend it. Go to coretrex.com. That's C-O-R-E-T-R-E-X.com. These Speaker 1 (5:20) guys are the game changer. Speaker 2 (5:22) Man. You know. It's so, it's, because it's, because you, you know, it's like, I, there's like moments that you're like, man, I was away for this. Speaker 1 (5:32) I was, you know, I was working on this. Yes, yes, yes. And you're going like, I wish Speaker 2 (5:36) I had a, you can't, it's, it's, it's. Speaker 2 (5:40) time just goes through your fingers. You can't hold on to it. Right, but you Speaker 1 (5:43) can't. Everything you're saying has been my life for the last six months. And I keep telling myself, and my wife will tell me, you got to not do that. Because here's the thing. We are all imperfect people. Imperfect beings. But I've done my darndest with the parenting. And one thing I did right, I traveled a ton. You traveled a ton. I know that our lives were on the road a lot. But I didn't do it for fishing trips. Yeah. I didn't do it for a bowling weekend with my college buddies. Like it was to draw a paycheck. Speaker 2 (6:15) Yeah. Speaker 1 (6:16) It never left the house without, never got on an airplane unless it was to draw a paycheck. So, and that's for the family, right? That's what the whole gig is. But nonetheless. Yeah. It prevented me from being the T-ball coach I wanted to be or prevented me from having a hand in an Americana father-son relationship that I had wished for. Truth of the matter is, whatever your father-son relationship is, is exactly what it's supposed to be because everybody's job is different. Were you closer to your Speaker 2 (6:49) dad? Speaker 1 (6:50) I was, yeah. Speaker 1 (6:53) He didn't travel that much. He traveled some, but not like I did. And this was in Nashville? Yeah, born and raised in Nashville. Speaker 2 (6:59) Can we start at the beginning of your... Speaker 1 (7:03) Let's do it. Speaker 2 (7:04) Yeah. Yeah, just because my brain just went there. So tell them, you know, these are things I don't know about you, Rich. I want to get to know you. Was music first or was acting first? Speaker 1 (7:16) No, acting. Acting was first. Music is a hobby. Music to me is like pick up basketball with your buddies. Speaker 2 (7:21) Really? Speaker 1 (7:21) I've been in bands. I wish I could say Speaker 2 (7:23) that, though, because for me to like, I can drum a little bit, but you guys are good. You're a good band. Thank you. You're not like a hack, like just pick it up. You guys are like legit music. It's good. Speaker 1 (7:33) Thank you. I appreciate that. Well, you know, we try. And I'm smart enough to surround myself with people who are better than I am. Speaker 2 (7:40) That Speaker 1 (7:40) is the key. The march of a good leader is being the worst one in the room. So I have – I played in bands. I started playing guitar when I was like 13, 14 years old just for fun. Exactly. No dreams of being a star. Just wanted to play parties and goof around with my buddy. And that's exactly what we did. We were in a cover band. Speaker 2 (8:03) You did a cover band? Speaker 1 (8:05) We were a cover band. We were playing the old time rock and roll stuff for high school parties. And then... Went to USC for college, Southern California, not South Carolina, Speaker 2 (8:19) and Speaker 1 (8:20) had a band there, again, just for fun, like a blues band, just a bunch of guys. It's just always been something I've done. And the second. Speaker 1 (8:29) there's been somebody and this rarely happened, but somebody who's like, man, we got to get signed. We got to like play, you know, I would bow out because I'm like, I'm just not, you know, you know, the acting is hard enough. Speaker 2 (8:39) Yeah. Speaker 1 (8:39) Like I was already starving in one field. I didn't want to starve in two. Speaker 2 (8:43) Yeah. Speaker 1 (8:44) So, and, and I know where my strengths were. Like I'm also wise enough. I feel like understanding pushing yourself is great and I'm all for it. And I tell all the people all the time, go for it, reach for it, do. dive in right Speaker 2 (8:59) but Speaker 1 (9:00) i do think there's a certain amount of realism that has to exist in one's personal journey if you want to try to succeed you got to find your lane Speaker 2 (9:10) you Speaker 1 (9:11) know what i mean like if if if southern Speaker 1 (9:18) boyish Richard Spate starting a career said, no, I'm only going to play street thugs. You know, I would never have made a nickel. Yeah. Like I'm narrowing my focus. You would be a great Speaker 2 (9:31) street thug. Thank you. Speaker 1 (9:35) Yeah, yeah. Like a Peaky Speaker 2 (9:37) Blinders street thug. You know what I mean? Speaker 1 (9:40) Something with charm. Yeah, exactly. How are you? How are you going there? Exactly. Well, I'm the goofy guy. I'm the goofy guy. You know, the gun goes off. I'm like, I'm shooting myself in the foot. So music to me was that. It was like I understood that I was not a powerhouse player. And I was not trying to be a powerhouse player or fool anybody into thinking I was a powerhouse player. I was fun. I'm good on stage. I'm good with the microphone. I'm good with the chit-chat and the banter and the having of the fun, you know, and being sure everybody else is having fun. This band I'm in now, which is Dick Jr. and the Volunteers, which is a country band, full-on country band. Speaker 2 (10:20) Like, Speaker 1 (10:21) I was never playing country music before. Now I'm full-on country for many reasons. Number one, As soon as I started having kids, I started listening to country music more. And I don't know if that's a flashback to my youth because my dad did. Also, country music, I found that from a language standpoint, very little bleeping you got to do in a country song. Yeah, it's true. Pretty safe. The whole radio station, you kind of play the hits and you're not going to be like, ooh, oops. My Speaker 2 (10:49) daughter, her favorite, if you ask her, because I played it a ton, was, you know, she's... She would say Johnny Cash. She loves Johnny Cash. Yeah. You know? Yeah. And it's crazy. My boys Speaker 1 (10:59) love country now. Yeah. And I think, you know, I kind of, full disclosure, when you're from Nashville, or at least when I was from Nashville, and you're into music, you have a tendency to pull away from country music because it was a stereotypical brand of the town. And Nashville is also different now. Nashville that I grew up in, I moved to Los Angeles, California to go to college. And immediately people thought I was stupid and racist based on my accent, which baffled me Speaker 2 (11:28) because Speaker 1 (11:28) I didn't I'd never been around non-southerners. Yeah. And I went to an all boys prep school. I was anything. I was as far away from racist and stupid as you could get. Speaker 2 (11:38) Yeah. Speaker 1 (11:39) But the but I realized, oh, at that time in America, a southern accent. I mean, then you start to think about it. Well, every idiot in every movie has a southern accent. Yeah. They always use the southern accent for the dimwit. Speaker 2 (11:50) Yeah. Speaker 1 (11:51) For the douchebag. Which is not fair. Which Speaker 2 (11:54) is not fair. It's not. Speaker 1 (11:55) Nope. It's also not accurate because the South has generated more American presidents than any other part of the country. That is true. Speaker 2 (12:01) All Speaker 1 (12:01) that to say, you know, along with the charm and the manners and all the old school things that people would find delightful about the South, there was that little bit of a thing. So I kind of, that stereotype also made me kind of reject country music as a style that I wanted to play. Speaker 2 (12:18) I Speaker 1 (12:19) came back to it as a grown man. I hadn't been in bands for years. And when it came time to start another band, the guys I was starting it with were like, dude, we've got to be a country. Like, this is what you are. Can Speaker 2 (12:30) I throw this out there? Do you think maybe because I think the good country, like outlaw country, they're telling a story of a life lived. I think when people, artists tell stories like country, like... maybe you just weren't ready to tell that story. Like you've lived a pretty fucking awesome life and you've been through some things. So like good that you're, you're telling the story now, maybe you're, you know, maybe that's why I found you again. You're ready to tell that story, the country story. I Speaker 1 (12:58) think that's a very astute point. And, and, and that goes part and parcel with what we were just talking about earlier, parenthood and those, those, those chapters of life. Have Speaker 2 (13:07) you written a song about your son leaving yet? Speaker 1 (13:10) No, dude. I mean, I have not. And I don't know if I'm ready yet. Speaker 2 (13:14) Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? Speaker 1 (13:16) Yeah, yeah. Because you hear those songs. Full disclosure to you, I went to the movies on Friday night by myself when I was in Chicago. I Speaker 2 (13:25) was Speaker 1 (13:25) killing time. I went to Speaker 2 (13:26) the Speaker 1 (13:26) movies by myself and sat in the theater and cried at every parent-child moment throughout the whole movie. And that's not a surprising revelation until you... You hear me tell you the title of the movie. It was Conjuring 4. That's not a Speaker 2 (13:43) movie you Speaker 1 (13:43) think of Speaker 2 (13:43) as Speaker 1 (13:44) being a tearjerker. But I sobbed my way Speaker 2 (13:47) through Speaker 1 (13:48) Conjuring 4. Speaker 2 (13:49) Was the top of your popcorn wet, not from the butter, but from your tears? Yes. I Speaker 1 (13:53) was a mess because there's a daughter in there and it was the parents and she gets, you know, it's like, ah. And I was just, and I'm sure people around me thought I was a. Speaker 1 (14:05) This guy's coming down off something. Speaker 2 (14:08) This Speaker 1 (14:08) guy's life's in the shit. Speaker 2 (14:10) He's crying, sobbing, and conjuring. He came to conjuring for Speaker 1 (14:14) it. Sob it out. Speaker 2 (14:17) That's crazy, man. Yeah, so Speaker 1 (14:19) maybe you're right. Maybe the stories I'm telling now make more sense. But I will say this. That's why I love country music. You just said something that I think is where, as a creative person, Speaker 2 (14:29) country Speaker 1 (14:30) music allows you to be funny, angry. patriotic, resentful, in love, heartbroken, Speaker 2 (14:38) all Speaker 1 (14:39) the things. Whimsical, Speaker 2 (14:40) direct, Speaker 1 (14:41) on one album. Speaker 2 (14:43) 100%. You Speaker 1 (14:43) can hit all those notes on different songs, and nobody goes, well, that's off-brand, because country is that wide a lane. Speaker 2 (14:51) Yeah. A dog, a truck, a beer, and a broken heart. Speaker 1 (14:54) Yeah. Speaker 2 (14:55) You know, that's kind of the spectrum of life. You're going to touch some of that in some way, shape, or form, whether it's a truck or you could say, you know, an electric truck or a Tesla or whatever it is, but you're going to have... But Speaker 1 (15:06) it is kind of a universal thing because even people who don't get, like they're not from small-town America, Speaker 2 (15:12) there's Speaker 1 (15:14) something about that struggle or that joke or that date gone wrong or that marriage gone right that people relate to. Speaker 2 (15:21) Yeah. There's a song that I believe it's the guy that's married to Faith Hill. Kimberly Williams. Faith Hill. Oh, Tim McGraw. He has this song, and it literally, I'll get choked up thinking about it, but it's about daddy's girl, daddy's little girl. And he talks about Speaker 1 (15:42) his daughter. Daughter? Yeah. Speaker 2 (15:44) Oh, my God. And it just talks about all that. And it's like, my daughter, my boys and my daughter, I'm saying, I can't, you know, and I'm at the point in my career, too, where it's like, there's no assholes allowed jobs that I'm doing. And anything that I go and do, I got to be able to look at my kids in the eye and say, I'm leaving right now. But what I'm about to go do is going to be for you. And I know I'm going to miss the game. I know I'm going to miss this. But I know it's something that is going to change your life or it's going to make you good. But it's like to miss anything of them, it's got to be fucking worth it. It has to be. I know. But, Speaker 1 (16:26) you know, the other thing is, I mean, you can tell me your opinion on this, but sometimes, man, like I remember one time an offer came in for an indie film. Speaker 1 (16:36) it was a decent paycheck, not great, but a decent paycheck, nice limited couple of two weeks away. And it was over the weekend and I read the material and the agent called me on Monday. She's like, I read the material and we'll talk about it. And she goes, so what'd you think of the material? And I go, does it matter? Kind of. I mean, because like it wasn't Speaker 2 (16:59) horrible. Yeah. And Speaker 1 (17:01) at that point. I got kids. I got mouths to feed. I have a responsibility to go do the job. I'm like, Speaker 2 (17:06) does Speaker 1 (17:06) it matter that it's not my favorite thing in the planet? Speaker 2 (17:08) Yeah. I Speaker 1 (17:09) said, are the people decent you're talking to? Is Speaker 2 (17:11) the Speaker 1 (17:11) check going to clear? Is the check clearing to clear? Speaker 2 (17:14) Yeah, 100%. Yeah, it's true, though. It's like it is, you know, and look, we've been very lucky in our careers to have the careers that we have. But you do as humans. Speaker 2 (17:26) have like i'm sure you and your wife have had this before like you go on a vacation and you're like the first couple days like oh this is so good it's just you and your wife and then by like the fourth or fifth day you're like man i can't wait to get home my kids like you're like i Speaker 1 (17:38) don't think it's four days i think it's like 48 hours in yeah like you're facetiming the kids Speaker 2 (17:44) yeah and they're and then they're like a day we're watching we're we're busy i'm like hey whoa whoa whoa whoa where you going i'm gonna talk to you No, for sure. Speaker 1 (17:52) They're a moving target. Yeah, I know. It's always me who's like, hey, what are you doing? Trying to leave. Speaker 2 (18:00) Three pillars of discipline, spirit, mind, body, in that order. That right there is the foundation of a company I started called Born of Discipline. It's incredibly important to me. This company incorporates my faith. The lessons I learned from my father on discipline, pain from regret or pain from discipline is something my dad always said to me. And I've incorporated that into my life. Speaker 1 (18:22) And I want to share it with you. Go check it out at bornofdiscipline.com. Speaker 2 (18:26) So, hey, so when did you move to L.A.? Like what was the – College. Sorry, not to L.A., but when was your acting gig, when that bug hit you? Like when were you just like, I'm going to like – Speaker 1 (18:39) When I was a kid, man, I did local theater in Nashville. So I had two older sisters who did theater. And they did dance class. And so I started doing dance class in theater. I was like, oh. Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly, my favorite. Speaker 2 (18:52) Singing in the Rain, I broke the tape watching that. I Speaker 1 (18:54) wanted to be Fred Astaire as a kid. I did tap dancing. I really wanted Speaker 2 (18:58) to Speaker 1 (18:58) be Fred Speaker 2 (18:58) Astaire. Me too. Speaker 1 (18:59) Oh, my God. Speaker 2 (19:00) Look Speaker 1 (19:00) at us. Speaker 2 (19:01) Yeah. Speaker 1 (19:02) And so I wish I'd never quit, by the way. I wish I'd stayed in the tap dance lane. I'm bummed that I stopped. Do Speaker 2 (19:08) you Speaker 1 (19:08) remember when Speaker 2 (19:08) Tony Danza and Sammy Davis, and the guy that did, what's his name? Gregory Speaker 1 (19:17) Hines? Yeah, God. See, I don't remember Tony Danza. Tony Danza did. Speaker 2 (19:21) Well, Tony Danza, he was a decent tap dancer, but he did the intro. There's this bit where he intros everybody. He was young, and he does a little bit. And there was that movie Taps or whatever. Yeah, Taps. God, that was so good. That was one. Speaker 1 (19:36) Taps. Taps is the military. Yeah, that's Speaker 2 (19:38) right. But it was like that whole, that just, there was a guy in a tuxedo, you know, just like. dancing like that. I just remember I was like, you know, Christopher Walken, like, like would get on my, there's Speaker 1 (19:51) just Speaker 2 (19:51) something so cool. Like, you know, this is going Speaker 1 (19:55) to sound shallow, but I remember being in, uh, in my twenties, I'd long since given up dancing, you know, and I had a friend who was a choreographer dancer. She was very incredibly talented and I'd go see her shows. Like they'd be a performance and there'd be tap dancers involved. And this is when I was single. And I would see this guy who was their primary tap dancer, who was like a straight dude, who was like the Tony Hawk of tap dancing. He'd come out and he'd be unbelievable. And wearing like, dressed like you're, like we're dressed like baseball hats, t-shirt, Speaker 2 (20:27) comes Speaker 1 (20:28) out, just tap his face off. And every girl in the entire room was just like collapsing. Speaker 2 (20:35) Oh, yeah. Speaker 1 (20:36) And I'm like, afterwards, I'm like. And Tracy's like, yeah, he's the one straight dude in our entire. Speaker 2 (20:42) Smart, smart man. Unit. Speaker 1 (20:44) I'm like, he's a genius. That guy Speaker 2 (20:47) knows what's up. He's like, I know what I mean. You guys play sports. I will tell. I mean, no joke. Like it is, you know, I never, ever got to the level of any of those guys, but I always loved percussion and just the thing. And like, man, it just, there was something that. When you saw the guys do it, like when it was done right, you're like, it was like, how are they making that sound? Speaker 1 (21:09) And Speaker 2 (21:09) the slide across the, when they throw the dust, like the little sand on the thing, just the sawdust or whatever on the ground. You Speaker 1 (21:19) know, like the stomp type stuff. Yeah, yeah. Did Speaker 2 (21:22) you see Stomp in New York? Of Speaker 1 (21:24) course. I saw Stomp when it came to L.A. I took the kids. Speaker 2 (21:27) Like the greatest. Yeah. Speaker 1 (21:29) This thing here, I was like, what's it with this weird slap thing Speaker 2 (21:32) back and forth? It's like, how does the body just... make that sound it was like i Speaker 1 (21:36) dude it's amazing also how do you decide like hey guys you want to grab a couple of uh long-handled janitorial brooms and put on a show somebody was taking mushrooms i can tell that you guys like i got an idea guys follow me they saw somebody sobbing and conjuring this guy Speaker 2 (21:52) like this weirdo they would have they would have heard like drip drip the tears and ruffled this thing that drip drip drip pop drip drip chew pop chew It's crazy. So what was your first acting gig? Speaker 1 (22:06) Well, so when I was in Nashville, Speaker 2 (22:09) a Speaker 1 (22:10) couple of productions came through town for Disney Channel. And so I did a couple of local hire. There was something called Love Leads the Way, which was a... Speaker 1 (22:28) uh true story of us of the first seeing eye dog in america and the guy had been morris frank was the real gentleman's name he was from nashville even went to my high school so they they told his life story at the disney channel movie and i played some kid part in that and so i would do like Speaker 1 (22:48) small, you know, a couple of scenes here, a couple of scenes there. Cause again, the talent pool in Nashville is very small, especially the kid acting pool. So local getting local work was apparently pretty easy. Cause I've watched some of these things and I'm, I'm horrific. I was no prodigy. I think I was just the only guy in the room. It was literally, I'm watching some stuff. I'm like, that's unbearably bad, but Hey, I guess it was like, it was enough to like, get by and then I can sort of build on that. It's good. It's like I got off the bench early. And then I did, when I was in high school, I got to do Ernest Goes to Camp because that shot in Nashville. Oh, wow. Which was kind of a fun like kids movie. Yeah. So Speaker 2 (23:29) I Speaker 1 (23:29) got to do that with some dudes that I'm still friends with. So I did a couple of things like that that were like, obviously not to make a living. They're just little, you know, put some money in your